CHAPTER XVII
LOVE FINDS A WAY
Less than three weeks later, Harold Mainwaring entered MissCarleton's private drawing-room in Mr. Thornton's London home.Soon after her arrival in the city she had received from him abrief note of apology, stating that unexpected business of thegreatest importance would render it impossible for him to call asearly as he had anticipated; hence this was their first meetingsince the leave-taking on board the "Campania."
As Miss Carleton stepped forward with cordial smile and handextended to welcome her visitor, she was shocked at the change inhis appearance. He was pale, almost haggard, and deep lines aboutthe mouth and eyes told of some intense mental strain. She gavea low cry of astonishment, for it seemed as though years, insteadof only a few weeks, had intervened since she had seen that face.
"Mr. Mainwaring, you have been ill!" she exclaimed.
"No, Miss Carleton," he replied, his face lighting with a raresmile; "I have been perfectly well, but loss of sleep and constantcare and anxiety have told rather severely on me. Nothing moreserious, I assure you."
"Anxiety!" she repeated, at the same time motioning him to a seatby her side. "Surely you do not anticipate any difficulty inestablishing your claim?"
"No difficulty so far as its validity is concerned. My attorneysassure me there can be no question as to that with such irrefutableproofs in my possession, but some unlooked-for complications havearisen, and we have had to prepare ourselves to meet them. But Idid not call to burden you with my perplexities, Miss Carleton.Tell me of yourself. I trust you have been well since I last sawyou."
"Yes, I am usually well," said Miss Carleton, who thought shedetected on the part of her visitor an avoidance of any detailsconcerning himself; "but I have been rather bored of late." Then,in answer to his look of inquiry, she continued, "Of course, onaccount of Hugh Mainwaring's death, we have been living veryquietly since our return, but, notwithstanding that fact, societyhas been paying due homage to the prospective increase of fortuneand added social position of the Mainwarings. I am not particularlyfond of society in the ordinary sense of the word, you know, and Ihave found it exceedingly tiresome."
"From reports, I should judge 'society' to be very fond of yourself,"he remarked, with a smile.
"After its own fashion," she replied, smiling in return; "but itbecomes very monotonous. It is the same old round, you know, onlythat just now it bows a little lower than formerly, while it minglescondolences and congratulations in the most absurd manner. Onehears, 'Such a dreadful affair! so shocking, don't you know!' and'Such delightful fortune! I quite envy you, my dear!' all in thesame breath. I am only awaiting what society will say when the realfacts become known."
Harold Mainwaring made no reply, but a strange pallor overspreadhis already pale face, at which Miss Carleton wondered.
"I have thought very often of you during these past weeks," shecontinued, "and felt quite impatient to learn how you wereprogressing, and your note was so brief, you know. It left so muchunsaid. I fear you forget how interested I am in all that concernsyourself."
"No," he replied, slowly, "I do not forget; and I appreciate yourinterest in me even though I may not seem to,--even though I amforced, as you say, to leave so much unsaid which I had hoped tosay."
Something in his manner, more than in what he said, thrilled herwith a vague, undefinable sense of impending evil, and, during theslight pause which followed, she dreaded his next words, lest theyshould in some way confirm her apprehensions. He said nothingfurther, however, and when she spoke it was with an assumedlightness and cheerfulness which she was far from feeling.
"I hoped to have the pleasure of meeting you often ere this, andmy uncle and cousin would have been so glad to welcome you totheir home during your stay in London, but they have just gone outof town for a few days."
"Ordinarily, Miss Carleton," he replied, quietly, "I should bepleased to meet them, but on the present occasion, as I sail,to-morrow, I naturally care to see no one but yourself."
"To-morrow!" she exclaimed, while her own cheek suddenly paled."Do you return so soon?"
"Yes," he replied, observing her emotion, and speaking rapidly toconceal his own feelings; "my business is at last completed. Ihave been detained longer than I expected, and I found thesituation more complex than I anticipated, but I shall return wellequipped for the battle."
"And you will win, I am sure. Tell me something regarding yourplans," she added, with a wistful smile that touched her companionfor more than he cared to betray.
"Mr. Alfred Barton goes with me to America," he said, speakingcheerfully; "and we have already cabled instructions to Mr.Sutherland, my New York attorney, regarding the initiatory steps.Mr. Barton and myself will be accompanied by James Wilson, the oldservant who witnessed the execution of the will,"--Miss Carleton'seyes brightened,--"and also by a thoroughly competent, first-classScotland Yard officer."
She gave a low exclamation. "I see what a powerful witness oldWilson will make; but the detective, what will you do with him?"
"We are going to investigate the murder of Hugh Mainwaring," hesaid, calmly.
"Why, surely, you cannot mean--" she hesitated. "You do not thinkthat suspicion will be directed against any of the guests at FairOaks, do you?"
"My dear Miss Carleton, I cannot say at present. Perhaps," he added,slowly, looking steadily into her eyes, "perhaps, when all is over,suspicion will be directed against myself so unmistakably that publicopinion will pronounce me guilty."
"I cannot believe that," she cried; "and even were it so,--shouldthe whole world pronounce you guilty,--I would still believe youinnocent; and I think," she added, quickly, "that is your object inemploying a detective: by finding the real murderer, you willestablish your own entire innocence."
"May God grant it!" he replied, with a fervor she could notunderstand. "I thank you, Miss Carleton, for your kind words; Ishall never forget them; and, however the battle goes, I can feelthere is one, at least, whose friendship and confidence are mine,can I not?"
"Most assuredly, Mr. Mainwaring. But why do you speak as thoughthere were a possibility of defeat or failure? I am so confidentthat you will win, after the story of your life that you have givenme, that I am all impatience to learn the outcome of the contest,just as having read one chapter in some thrilling romance I am eagerfor the next."
He smiled at her comparison. "Real life, as well as romance,sometimes contains startling surprises, Miss Carleton. The nextchapter might prove less pleasant."
She looked keenly into his face for a moment, and her manner becameas serious as his own.
"There must be something," she said, "of which you have not told me;if so, I will not ask your confidence until you choose to bestow it,nor do I trust you, personally, any the less. It only seemed to me,with your prospects of success, and the great wealth and enviableposition so soon to become yours, there could be no unpleasantanticipations for the future."
A bitter smile crossed his face, as he inquired in low, tense tones,"Of what avail are wealth and position to one who finds aninsurmountable barrier placed between himself and all that he holdsmost precious on earth?"
"I fear I do not understand you," she replied. "I cannot imagineany barriers surrounding you; and did they exist, my judgment ofyou would be that you would find some way to surmount or destroythem."
"There are some barriers, some fetters," he said, gently, "againstwhich humanity, even at its best, is powerless."
"Yes," she answered, a touch of sadness in her voice; "and there aresometimes sorrows and troubles in which even the closest and warmestfriendship is powerless to aid or comfort."
"Don't allow yourself to think that of your friendship for me," hesaid, quickly. "Assured of your confidence and sympathy, I shallbe ten times stronger to face whatever the future may bring. If Isucceed in what I am about to undertake, I shall one day tell youall that your friendship has been worth to me. If I fail, thethought that you believe in me and
trust me, while it will not beall that I could wish, may be all that I can ask."
"And if you should fail," she queried, slowly, "would you give meno opportunity to show you, and others, my confidence in you, eventhen?"
"My dear Miss Carleton," he replied, in tones tremulous withsuppressed feeling, "much as I appreciate your kindness, I wouldnever, now or at any future time, willingly mar your life or yourhappiness by asking you to share any burden which might be laidupon me. I would at least leave you to go your way in peace, whileI went mine."
"And I?" she asked, reproachfully. "Would it contribute to myhappiness, do you think, to remember the sorrow and suffering whichI was not allowed to share?"
"Could you not forget?"
"Never!"
The young man sprang to his feet abruptly, his face working withemotion, and took two or three turns about the room. At last hepaused, directly in front of her, and, folding his arms, stoodlooking down into the beautiful eyes that met his own sounflinchingly. He was outwardly calm, but the smouldering firewhich seemed to gleam in his dark eyes told of intense mentalexcitement.
"Miss Carleton," he said, slowly, in low tones, but yet whichvibrated through her whole being, "you are almost cruel in yourkindness; you will yet make a coward of me!"
"I have no fear of that," she answered, quietly.
"Yes, a coward! Instead of remaining silent as I intended, andkeeping my trouble within my own breast, you will compel me inself-defence to say that which will only give you pain to hear,thereby adding to my own suffering."
"Perhaps you misjudge," she replied, and her voice had a ring ofpathos in it; "any word of explanation--no matter what--would beless hard for me to endure than this suspense."
"God knows I would make full explanation if I could, but I cannot,and I fear there is nothing I can say that will not add to yoursuspense. Miss Carleton, you must need no words from me to tellyou that I love you. I have loved you almost from the first dayof our meeting, and whatever life may have in store for me, you,and you alone, will have my love. But, loving you as I do, couldI have looked forward to the present time, could I for one momenthave foreseen what was awaiting me, believe me, you should neverhave known by word or look, or any other sign, of my love."
He paused a moment, then continued. "If that were all, I mighthave borne it; I could have locked my love forever within my ownheart, and suffered in silence; but the fact that you have given mesome reason to believe that you were not wholly indifferent to me,--thethought that I might in time have won your love,--makes thepossibilities of the future a thousand times harder to bear. It isharder to forego the joys of Paradise when once you have had aglimpse within! It was to this I alluded when I spoke of theinsurmountable barrier placed between myself and all that I holdholiest and best on earth!"
"But I do not understand!" she cried, her lovely color deepeningand her eyes glowing with a new light, until Harold Mainwaringconfessed to himself that never had he seen her so beautiful. "Whatbarrier could ever exist between you and me?"
For an instant he looked at her in silence, an agony of love andlonging in his eyes; then drawing himself up to his full height,he said, slowly,--
"Not until I can stand before you free and clear from the faintestshadow of the murder of Hugh Mainwaring, will I ever ask for thatmost precious gift of your love!"
Her face blanched at the mere possibility suggested by his words."But you are innocent!" she cried in swift protest, "and you couldprove it, even were suspicion directed against you for a time."
"Even admitting that I were, the taint of suspicion is sometimes aslasting as the stain of crime itself."
She arose and stood proudly facing him. "Do you think I would fearsuspicion? To hear from your own lips that you love me and thatyou are innocent would be enough for me; I would defy the wholeworld!"
He did not at once reply, and when he spoke it was slowly andreluctantly, as though each word were wrung from him by torture.
"My dear Miss Carleton, even to you I cannot say that I am innocent."
There was a moment's pause, during which she gazed at him,speechless with astonishment; a moment of intense agony to HaroldMainwaring, as he watched whether her faith in him would waver.But she gave no sign, though she scanned his face, as the condemnedcriminal scans the document handed him as the fateful day approaches,to ascertain whether it contains his pardon or his death sentence.
"Understand me," he said at last, gently, unable longer to endurethe terrible silence, "I do not admit that I am in any way guilty,but until I am fully acquitted of any share in or knowledge of thedeath of Hugh Mainwaring, I can make neither denial nor admission,one way or the other."
"But you still love me?" she inquired, calmly.
"Miss Carleton,--Winifred,--how can you ask? You are, and alwayswill be to me, the one, only woman upon earth."
"That is sufficient," she answered, with a strange, bright smile;"my faith in you is perfect, and faith and love can wait."
"Wait, my love! until when?" he cried.
"If needful, until Eternity's sunlight dispels Earth's shadows!Eternity holds ample compensation for all of Earth's waiting."
"But, my darling," he said, half protesting, while he folded her tohis breast, "you know not the risk you may be running; I cannotaccept the sacrifice that may be involved."
"My decision is taken, and it is irrevocable," she answered, withan arch smile; then added, "There can be no barriers between us,Harold, for Love will find a way!"