Chapter 1.8
“I’ve been thinking,” Tom said to Elaine on the phone, “All this avoiding each other is too hard on the boys. I think we need to come to some meeting of the minds and find a way to get along better. For their sake, I mean. We can act like adults.”
“I agree,” she said, but then did not offer him anything more to work with.
“Do you want to get together to talk things over? Go out to dinner, maybe?”
“I don’t see the point, really. We can just do it, can’t we? Make nice in front of the kids, I mean.”
Tom took a deep breath. She was not making this any easier. “C’mon. Don’t be like that. I won’t bite,” he said.
“You have to apologize for running out on me in the restaurant like that. That was awful,” she said, with more than a little hurt in her voice.
“I do apologize. Really, I do,” said Tom. “I mean it.”
“Fine. Apology accepted,” she said. “You can come to my office at work any day between ten and twelve if you really want to talk.”
“I’d have to take off work to do that,” said Tom.
“Take it or leave it,” said Elaine.
The next morning at ten minutes past ten, Tom pulled into the parking lot at Webster’s Gardens. He was no connoisseur of gardens and landscape design but anyone with half a soul couldn’t help but feel nurtured by the arrangement around the entrance, particularly the large pond with overhanging weeping cherries. He stopped to admire the setting before setting off to try to locate Elaine’s office. A very fit woman in a Webster’s Gardens polo shirt approached him. “Can I help you?” she asked.
“I’m here to see Elaine,” he said. “I don’t know where to find her.”
“You must be Tom,” she said. “I’m Judy. Pleased to meet you.” Tom shook her hand, which was surprisingly strong for a woman. He smiled at her and to himself, pleased that Elaine must be interested enough in seeing him to have someone watching for him to arrive. “I’m pleased to meet you too,” he said. “I just realized I haven’t met many of Elaine’s other friends.”
“Let me give you a quick tip,” she whispered, conspiratorially. “Elaine won’t let you see that she really does want this relationship to work out. She’s too afraid. You can push if you’re not too pushy.”
“Huh?” said Tom, but the quick little confidence was over, and Judy was right back in character as the helpful employee. “I’ll show you the way, but then I’ve got places to be,” she said. “Through the front entrance, walk all the way through the patio furniture to the dead end at the back of the store where the sign says ‘employees only’ going into the experimental greenhouse. Her office is just to the left of that, but it’s not marked. Look for the green birdhouse painted on the door. It’s like her symbol. Toodles.” She strode off toward a path that went around the main building. Tom watched her go, wondering if he’d imagined her words of advice. He shrugged and made his way to the office.
The door was open, so he paused trying to decide whether to knock on the door frame. Elaine looked up from her desk, covered in papers and seedlings in peat pots, and waved him in. She looked pleased to see him for a fraction of a second but put a stern look back on her face quickly, although not quickly enough to fool him.
“Hi gorgeous. It’s been ages,” he said. He hadn’t intended to start off on such a strong note until he talked to Judy, but it just sort of happened. Elaine grinned and motioned for him to take a seat in the Adirondack chair that apparently served visitors to her office. “Cool,” he said, patting the chair on its wide arm. The seating arrangement did make him feel a bit at a disadvantage, but he decided not to let that throw him.
“Glad you like it,” she said. “This is a garden center after all.” She didn’t tell him that she had brought the chair in just a little while ago so that he would have to sit below her. She was not satisfied yet that the score was settled.
“So. State your case,” she said, secure in the power position behind the desk.
“Do you have to be so formal?” Tom asked.
“Yes,” she said.
He waited for a second for her to add more, but she did not. “OK. I really am sorry, like I said before. Please forgive me,” he said. “My behavior was rude that night.”
“I do forgive you,” she said. Again she didn’t return the conversational volleyball. Still his serve. He did make a mental note that if they were to ever end up married, as he still hoped, she might be a more formidable adversary in a fight than he was used to.
Tom got so nervous that he forgot everything that he’d planned to say and blurted out, “Will you go out with me again? Can we just start over?”
“No,” she said.
“Why?” Tom asked. He wasn’t really surprised, but he hoped she would offer an objection that he could overcome.
“I think you know why,” she said. It was clear to her that if his disgust at her family background, i.e. her mother’s profession, was strong enough to make him run from the restaurant that night, there was very little hope. She wanted him to tell her that he’d thought it over and it didn’t matter, but he hadn’t said any of that. He was simply settling for inferior goods, because he had no other options.
Tom said, “Well, it was worth a try.” He gave her his silly grin, and she wished it was not so cute.
Tom became more serious and said, “I was hoping that we could still come to some agreement to work together where the boys are concerned, even if you don’t want to date me. Celibate coparents, sort of.” She was still in love with Mr. X, and always would be. He had to accept the facts.
Elaine stood up, relenting on the relative power positions issue, and said, “Let’s take a walk. I guess we really should talk about that part of it.”
She showed him around the whole facility, talking enthusiastically about her new projects and the history of different sections. They arrived back at the pond by the front entrance and sat on a carved wooden bench. It was a rather conspicuous place for a personal conversation, but Tom was learning that Elaine never made such choices by accident. Perhaps she wanted to underscore the success of her business to make him feel small, but he knew she wasn’t like that. He didn’t suspect that she simply was hoping to override the scene with David Wells in her memory with something good happening between her and a man by the water.
“So then,” she began, “You were saying that we need to work together about the boys. I think that’s a good idea.” She really, really hoped that if she was nicer, he might say what she wanted him to say.
“Really? It’s that easy?” said Tom surprised. “I thought you’d put up more resistance.”
“Don’t be silly,” she said. “I love both the boys. So do you. They need us to get along.”
“Right. That’s exactly what I thought,” said Tom. “So it’s settled then.”
He had one foot in the door again. He could wear her down from there, maybe. At least he had the access. And the stuff about the kids was all true too. He was satisfied.
She was terribly disappointed but she gave him no sign of it. “First point on the parental agenda,” she said, “is that I’ve got it worked out for Josh and Max to both work here this summer. I was doing that anyway, you know.”
“I know, and I appreciate it,” said Tom. “I hope I can do something as good for Max to reciprocate.”
“He wants to learn all that stuff that you and Josh do fixing up old cars,” said Elaine. “He feels left out, and he really does like to learn nearly anything that he doesn’t know how to do. Would you teach him?”
“Of course,” said Tom. “I’d love to. Why didn’t he ever ask me?”
“Cause, silly, he doesn’t want to admit that he’s jealous of Josh.”
“Right,” said Tom. “I should’ve thought of it myself.”
“We do work well together don’t we?” said Elaine.
“
Yes’m we do,” said Tom. He leaned over to give her a kiss on the cheek, but she pulled away and stood up. “I’ve got to get back to work,” she said. “See you back on Jefferson Street.”
Tom’s latest restoration project, a baby blue 1971 Mustang convertible sat up on blocks in the garage minus its old exhaust system. Tom and Josh were preparing to install a new custom system with help from Max. They were used to working together like long time dance partners who could anticipate each other’s moves, but including Max was like adding an excited puppy to the dance. The new exhaust system was laid out on the floor like the fossil of a metallic beast with every bracket, hanger and adapter in its corresponding position the better to explain to Max what had to be done. “And these of course are the mufflers,” Tom said pointing.
Max eagerly said, “Right. They muffle sound. Something about the length is exactly the right distance to reflect the sound backward so the peaks and troughs of the sound waves moving in opposite directions cancel each other out. I looked it up.”
“If you say so,” said Tom. “I just know how to install them.”
“That’s actually very cool. Real science,” said Josh.
“Thank you,” said Max.
“Real science won’t help you though when your brackets are crooked and the whole mess just won’t line up,” said Josh.
“That’s the truth,” said Tom. “There’s nothing like experience. After you’ve made every mistake there is a couple of times, you know how to avoid them. So that’s it. We get all the brackets and hangers installed. Rough assemble as we go along to double check position, and then assemble for real from the headers back. The tricky part is the clearance going over the rear axle.”
Tom took a pair of brackets and slid under the car on his dolly. “Come under here and watch, Max. Sorry I’ve only got one dolly,” his voice floated up through the automotive obstacles. Josh demonstrated his technique for wiggling under the car and then moved out of the way to let Max take his place.
Josh passed the workers a few parts, fidgeted with the tools, tickled his father’s leg until Tom kicked his hand, and then fidgeted some more. “What’s happening down there?” he asked. “Max is a fast learner,” Tom’s voice answered. “He’s doing this one almost all by himself.”
Elaine appeared in the open garage door, wearing a pretty floral summer dress and carrying a tote bag. “Morning, Josh,” she said. “Where are the other guys?” Josh pointed at four feet.
The bigger pair of feet immediately shot out from under the car. The dolly rolled to a stop at Elaine’s feet and Tom jumped up, brushed himself off, and said, “Hi Elaine,” and stood there smiling and trying to act as though he’d been upright the whole time. Josh laughed and grabbed the opportunity to get the dolly and disappear.
Looking up at the underside of the Mustang with Max, Josh could see how far they’d gotten and picked up where Tom left off. He held the next bracket in place and Max efficiently attached it. “You really are getting the hang of this,” he said. “It’s kind of fun,” said Max. They worked together quietly so they could eavesdrop on the grownups. After a bit of small talk went by, Josh poked Max in the ribs and whispered, “Here it comes. He does this at least once a week.”
“Does what?” said Max. They heard Tom say, “Oh, by the way, I got you a little something.”
“That,” said Josh. “Give her stuff.”
“How did you know he was about to?” whispered Max.
“He always shuffles his feet right before. I’m watching his boots.”
Max laughed. “Watch this,” Josh told him. He pushed off of the gas tank to send the dolly rolling right into his father’s legs. Elaine was examining a book and avoiding Tom’s attempt to kiss her on the cheek. Tom managed to run his nose along her ear as she turned away and Josh ran into him at the same time. Josh laughed out loud.
“What’s going on out there?” Max asked.
“The usual. But he’s getting better at it,” Josh said still lying on his back.
“Don’t I get a present? It’s my birthday,” he asked up at his father. Tom stepped back and said, “You said you didn’t want a birthday this year after everything that’s happened and all.”
“Well, not a big deal birthday, but maybe a little deal birthday, though. Something,” said Josh. He really didn’t want a birthday but he couldn’t resist the impulse to give Tom some trash.
“Something. Maybe like this?” said Elaine. She pulled a wrapped package out of the tote bag. Tom grinned one of his “gotcha”, show-all-his-teeth-grins at his son. Max appeared to see what Josh got.
Josh, still on his back, took the present Elaine bent down to give him. Max rolled over next to him. They were like two toddlers playing on the floor.
The card was from Elaine and Tom together. Josh tore the paper off. Another wrapped box was inside and then another. Finally he got to an envelope which contained tickets for all of them to the Eagles hosting the Giants in two weeks. “Way cool,” said Josh. “Thank you both very much.”
“You’re welcome,” they both said in unison. Josh held his arms up for a hug, like a baby. Tom grabbed his arm and pulled him to a standing position and they hugged. Elaine kissed him on the cheek and he kissed her back. “When do I get some of that?” asked Tom. Elaine rolled her eyes but Tom could tell that she was pleased that he kept asking.
Max said what everyone was thinking but no one else would say. “I really miss Aunt Bonnie today.”
“Me too,” said Josh.
“Me three,” said Tom.
“We all do honey,” said Elaine. “Maybe she misses us too wherever she is.”
“Hey Mom. How are you doing?” said Josh to the rafters. Tom laughed.
“Don’t you think she’s up there?” said Max to Tom.
“I don’t know.” said Tom.
“What do you believe?” Elaine asked him. She gave him the impression that his answer was important.
Tom thought about it a minute and then said, “You mean God and philosophy and all that? I try not to think about it. You can drive yourself crazy. Why? What do you believe in?”
The boys disappeared back under the Mustang.
Elaine said, “I believe in myself. Everyone else is undependable, unpredictable, and possibly dangerous until proven otherwise.”
“Really?” said Tom.
“Yes. Really,” said Elaine. She leaned back against the work bench.
“You just need a good man,” said Tom.
“You know any?” said Elaine.
“Ouch.” Tom made a show of holding his chest.
“I’m sorry. That was mean.” She seemed to be genuinely sorry.
“You’re forgiven. And kind of cute.”
“You are incorrigible.”
“I bet you can even spell that.”
“Yep. As a matter of fact I can,” said Elaine.
“I’ve really got to get back to work,” said Tom. “Are you going to stick around?”
“For a while.”
“Excellent,” said Tom. “Josh, bring my dolly back out. Those brackets aren’t going to install themselves.”
Josh’s voice came out from the depths. “They are all done. We’re working on the pipes.”
“OK cool. Are the adapters on the headers?”
“Yep.”
“Come out anyway. Let me check them,” said Tom.
Under the car he inspected the work and told Max, “You guys did a nice job.” Max was enjoying the male attention. They were getting the first set of pipes into position when Max heard a different voice coming from above. “We came for Josh’s birthday. Why are you people working on Josh’s birthday?” it said.
“Oh. Yippee,” whispered Tom in a voice that signified the exact opposite.
“Who is it?” Max whispered.
“Josh’s grandmother. I’ve got to go.”
“I’ll stay here,” said
Max.
“I always knew you were a smart kid,” said Tom.
“Cause that’s what I want Grammy,” Max heard Josh say. “It’s my birthday and I can have what I want.”
“You have to have a real birthday. What’s that matter with people these days?” said Juliet.
“I’m sure Josh appreciates your interest, don’t you honey?” said Elaine.
“Yep. You betcha. Absolutely,” said Josh and then he suddenly appeared next to Max. He began to bang loudly on one of the exhaust pipes for no purpose other than to drown his grandmother out with the noise. Max giggled.
“I’m not doing so well,” said Juliet, loudly enough to be heard over the noise. “I’m upset.” Her tone became more desperate. “Really upset.”
Josh stopped banging. “Dad won’t take the bait. Wanna bet?” he whispered to Max.
“Mom will,” Max replied. “She can’t help it.”
“About what if I may ask?” said Elaine politely. “Told ya,” said Max.
“Oh my. It’s my poor Mitch,” Juliet wailed. Max started the banging this time and Josh eagerly joined in. Juliet got louder and louder to compensate.
“I haven’t heard a word, I tell you, not a word from him in months,” she yelled. “I purely don’t know what’s become of him.” The next pipe went in quietly. Max was intrigued.
“Sounds like a good thing to me,” Josh whispered.
“He’ll be around when he needs money,” Tom said.
“He’s driving me crazy with worry. How can he do this to me?” Juliet said.
“I’m sure he’s fine,” said Elaine.
“He’s not fine. He wouldn’t do this to me if he was fine,” Juliet snapped. Max started banging again with a bit of imitation of a flamboyant drummer. “Too much rhythm,” Josh told him. Max turned to find Marvin on his hands and knees watching them. Max nudged Josh to make him look at Marvin. Marvin winked at them and then disappeared.
Emboldened, Max said loudly enough for Juliet to hear, “If I might make a suggestion?”
“Are you out of your mind?” Josh whispered.
“What?” Juliet demanded.
“Have you filed a missing persons report with the police?” said Max.
There was no reply. After a couple of minutes of quiet, Josh asked, “Is she gone?”
“She skedaddled. I guess Max scared her off,” said Tom. “I don’t even try to understand.”
The boys both emerged. “Good. I need the dolly. We’re not getting anything done today.”
“Yes we are. We got it done. All you have to do is double check our clearances,” said Max, proudly.
Elaine laughed. “See Tom. They did most of it for you.” She was more than a little proud herself.
“Cool. Works for me. I must be a good teacher, then,” said Tom.
“I’m going to get going,” said Elaine. “I’ll walk you out,” said Tom.
At the corner Elaine carefully went out of her way to step around a certain, still stained, section of the sidewalk. She smiled ruefully at Tom, hoping he did not think her to be superstitious. He said sympathetically, “I still have dreams about that day.”
“I know it’s just concrete with, unfortunately, a bit of extra iron in it. I don’t believe in ghosts. Not really. But …,” her voice faded away. Tom smoothed her hair back from her face and kissed her cheek and this time she let him.
A few months later, Josh was sitting on his bed staring at his new laptop computer. The book report he was trying to write on Lonesome Dove refused to grow from two pages to three pages. Max was flat on his stomach on the other bed doing Chemistry homework. The room was quiet. Elaine was adamant about not listening to loud music when they were doing homework. Josh was astounded at first. His family used to be thrilled if he did it at all. They certainly didn’t care how. But he’d gotten used to the quiet and he had to admit that he did find it easier to concentrate. Summarizing a long meandering story into three pages was still too difficult, quiet or not, he thought.
Tom’s voice came floating down the hall, but Josh only heard a word here and there. He slowly became aware that something interesting was going on, probably because when Tom raised his voice one of the words Josh picked up was ‘coercion’ and another was ‘money.’
Josh put his laptop down, saw Max looking his way and put his finger in front of his lips, and tiptoed to the door. He stood just out of sight from the living room, but leaned into a spot where he could hear the adults talking.
“You shouldn’t do that,” said Max, rolling back over onto his stomach.
“Don’t you want to know what they’re talking about?” whispered Josh.
“If they wanted to talk to us, they would come in here,” said Max without looking away from his book. “They want to talk to each other.”
“You’re such a priss,” said Josh.
Max flipped his middle finger at Josh over his shoulder.
Josh closed his eyes to concentrate better. He barely heard Tom say, “I don’t care. I still think you don’t have to honor a promise made when you were too shocked to know what you were doing.”
Josh couldn’t make out everything Elaine said. Part of what he heard was, “responsible for bigger consequences than…something.”
Then Tom said, “Consequences to him, or consequences to Max and you?”
This time Josh heard Elaine clearly, because she must have turned in his direction. “Very big consequences to him.”
“Screw him,” said Tom. “I’m only concerned with my family.”
Elaine said, “Why should I upset the cart if Max isn’t concerned about it right now. You’re the only one who’s worried about it.”
Tom said, “Max is more worried about it than he ever lets on to you. He needs to know who his father is. Wouldn’t it drive you crazy not to know if it was you?”
Josh whispered to Max, “They’re talking about your father.”
“Really?” said Max with great interest. He slipped off the bed and came to take a spot opposite Josh. Josh shook his head at Max like he was a naughty little boy. Max stuck his tongue out in return.
Elaine said, “I think you’re the one who can’t stand not knowing. That’s not fair. I told you in the beginning that I couldn’t tell.”
“I really don’t care. I’m just arguing for Max’s sake. Really.”
“Theoretically, I agree with you. He should know who his father is. But this situation is more complicated than that.”
“No it really isn’t,” said Tom. “Truth is generally very simple.”
They were silent for a minute. Josh could tell they’d had this conversation before. He looked over at Max. Max was disturbed. Josh didn’t understand why, but he could see that Max’s face was twitchy.
Tom said, “He’ll find out someday. You can’t keep a secret like that forever. He’ll respect you more if he hears it from you.”
“I really want to tell him, you know?” said Elaine. “I hate keeping secrets.”
Max brushed past Josh and strode down the hall. Josh was too surprised to do anything at first and then he hurried along behind him to see what was going to happen.
Max came to a stop right in front of his mother and said, “So tell me then.”
Josh skidded to a halt at the door of the living room.
Elaine looked at him and didn’t say anything. Max crossed his arms in front of his chest and said, “It’s my life. Tell me.”
Elaine looked at Tom. Tom said, “You said he never directly asked. Now he’s asked.”
“Were you eavesdropping?” she asked Max accusingly.
“Yes,” he said without embellishment, or embarrassment. “Mom, come on. It’s time.”
Elaine took a deep breath, blew it out slowly and said, “Yes, you’re right. It’s time.”
She made a face, picked up the remote control and said, “How about I show you? It shouldn’t be t
oo hard to find him.”
She flipped to CNN, and held up a finger for silence, and waited until they finished a story about a fire in a coalmine. Then they moved on to the never-ending political news about the upcoming presidential primary. George Curfani, senator from Illinois had announced today that he was seeking the nomination. Elaine was still holding her finger up, intent on the TV screen and gave Max no clue what they were watching for. Tom shrugged his shoulders in response to Max’s curious look in his direction.
Then they showed a still photograph that they’d been showing all week of David Wells, the Governor of Colorado, and speculated as to whether his long awaited announcement was going to come in the next few days.
Elaine lowered her finger toward the screen.
Josh was getting tired of standing in the doorway and came in and sat on the couch.
“I see,” said Josh. “It’s obvious.”
“What?” said Max.
“Look at him, man,” said Josh. “You’re not his son. You’re his clone.”
“David Wells?” asked Max. “Really?”
“Do you know something about him?” asked Elaine.
“Yeah, I do,” said Max. “We’ve been doing a unit in social studies about elections.” He sat down where he stood, at his mother’s feet. His brain was too busy to think much about where he put his body.
“Wow,” Max said. “You weren’t kidding about big-time consequences.”
“No. I wasn’t,” said Elaine. “I’m going to have to tell him that the cat is out of the bag. I’m sure he wasn’t going to run anyway. Too much possibility of a big scandal.”
“Wow,” said Max again. “Can I meet him?”
“I guess that’s up to him,” said Elaine. “I don’t know.”
“Wow,” said Max for the third time. His brain was starting to catch up. “If I didn’t exist he’d be running, wouldn’t he?”
“Yes,” said Elaine. “Serves him right. He dumped me, and you, although you weren’t born yet, so he could get to this. And now, for the same reasons, he can’t close the deal. I guess he wasn’t quite as smart as he thought he was.”
“Wow,” said Max again.
“Let’s stop talking about his problems. Center of the damn universe,” said Elaine. “How are you?”
Max thought for a minute and said, “Like my life suddenly makes more sense. I’m not half human and half mystery. I’m a real person.”
“Good,” said Elaine. “I’m glad.”
“How about you?” Tom interjected. “How do you feel, Hon?”
Elaine grinned. “Like a big weight I’ve been carrying around for sixteen years is suddenly gone.”
“Excellent,” said Tom. “Now can we really start going out again?”
“Maybe,” said Elaine. “Are you sure you’re really OK, Max, honey?”
“I don’t think anyone cares how I’m doing,” said Josh, “but since you didn’t ask, I am fine thank you. Max, bro, your other pop? Are you going to tell people about him?”
“Wow,” said Max again. He looked at his mother. “I could ruin his life if I wanted to, couldn’t I?”
“Certainly,” she said. “Do you want to?”
Tom started to say something, but she held her hand up to shush him. Tom’s the one that wanted to get this over with, so he’d have to see what happened when all the balls that were set in motion began to roll. This question was strictly and only for Max.
Finally Max said, “No. I have a father now. David Wells can be deprived of my delightful company until hell freezes over and he dies a lonely old man. I just needed to know. I’m not going to tell anyone.”
Elaine got tears in her eyes. “I’m so proud of you, Max,” she said. She reached over to pull him up off of the floor and hugged him hard.
“Can I say something now?” said Tom, when they were finished.
“Yes. I’m sorry,” said Elaine.
“You are beautiful,” said Tom.
Elaine smiled at him, and at everyone.
Josh said, “I won’t tell anyone either, then. Mr. Details, that’s me. Always have to tie up all the loose ends, while you people get all the good lines,” which resulted in Josh and Max having a pillow fight with the couch cushions.
Tom and Elaine had a wonderful night. Elaine was late to work and gave every employee at the nursery a free hanging basket. Tom was learning that getting into the messy emotional stuff that he used to think men were supposed to avoid was quite a turn-on for the women. Who knew?