from themselves.” This resonates so true because people who are authentically happy are a joy to be around.
If you’re not sure where to begin on thinking more positive thoughts, first identify what makes you unhappy. Identifying the things you want to pull away from will help lean you toward the things that make you happy. Martha Beck said, “Every time you choose social acceptance over your true desires, or financial gain over ethics, or your comfort zone over a great adventure… you are not having happy thoughts.”
Search your heart. The secret to happiness is within you. Listen to your joy; it knows the way.
Can you imagine…positive, happy thoughts every day?
Finding Utopia
Column #245, Published 3-17-11
(second release)
I have previously told you about this dream, however, it has been on my mind quite a bit lately and I can’t help but feel very strongly that it bears repeating.
During a very thought provoking phone conversation with a friend I referred to an event in my past. To which they calmly responded, “It really doesn’t matter where we’ve been; it’s where we are going.” I know this to be true and after we hung up, I fell asleep and dreamed.
In my dream, my friend and I were flying on a rubberized canvas raft. Except it was more pancake shaped than a raft with sides. It was navy blue on top and I felt as if it was a different color on the bottom, possibly red. On the edges of the raft, where the colors formed a seam, a rope was threaded in and out around the entire raft. My friend was sitting cross legged on the edge, facing the direction we were going and holding the rope loosely in their left hand. Was the raft being guided or was it taking us? I knew not.
Uncertain of where we were going; or even if there was a destination. Yet, I was astounded by the terrain we were flying over and crawled to the edge and peered over the side for a better look. My friend sensed I was there and reached over to gently pull me away. Telling me it was better to focus on where we were going, which appeared to be a slight glow on the horizon. Apparently, what we were flying over wasn’t important.
The terrain we were flying over, however, was very diverse; changing from dangerously rocky mountain ranges to swampy marshlands. Randomly scattered about were plush valleys and meadows, which seemed few and far between. During the dream, I could not comprehend the reason for such a vast contrast in scenery. It wasn’t making sense.
As the glow on the horizon got brighter my friend would patiently refocus my attention on it. So I finally pulled myself away from the side and concentrated on the approaching brilliance. Suddenly, the ground below smoothed out and became flat; then it seemed to change to multi-jewel-toned water. The glow on the horizon became brighter, almost blinding, yet my eyes weren’t affected by its luminosity. Suddenly, shapes started to form and colors appeared more vibrant.
Amazingly the scene morphed into a magnificent island with white sand and green trees all surrounded by brilliant sapphire blue water. Objects dotted the landscape but my mind couldn’t quite form them into identifiable shapes. Yet they sparkled with amazing brilliance. In my dream I believed I had just discovered Utopia. Then I woke up.
Remembering the dream as soon as I arose, excitedly I realized I’d ‘dreamed’ the conversation from the night before. So I began writing in my journal. As my dream formed words on the page the meaning of the dream became clearer.
The ever-changing terrain was my life. Rocky mountains…the difficult times. Swampy areas…the overwhelming times. Valleys and meadows…the pleasant times. The purpose of the dream, I believe, was to remind me to stay focused on my goals…my future…my Utopia. I can’t even begin to tell you how profound this dream was.
Occasionally we all need a gentle reminder to keep moving toward the ‘glow.’ After all, our future is as bright as we can dream it. And keeping our hopes and desires always in our focus and continually moving toward our own version of Utopia is what life is all about.
Friends, Utopia is defined as: a place or state of perfection. What is your Utopia? Do you consciously keep your focus on it with every fiber of your being? Or, do you think about it every once in a while, when you have a spare moment? Consider where your life is going. What are your hopes, your dreams? How do you see your future? Ask yourself, what is my Utopia?
Can you imagine…all your dreams coming true?
The Bucket List
Column #274, Published 1-5-12
Upon rising on this wonderfully scrumptious first day of 2012 I felt totally energized. I felt confident, in control and ready to take on the world. In fact, I couldn’t remember the last time I felt so excited to be alive; so…in the moment. Suddenly the ‘meaning of life’ manifested itself with such profound clarity it took my breath away. It was exhilarating! Then I got out of bed. (I know, old joke… but still funny.)
Seriously though, I actually woke up this morning feeling magnificent. Taking the canine crew outside for ‘stinky’ and ‘tinky’ duty I was feeling so prolific I decided to explain the insight of a ‘brand new year’ to them. A brand new year when anything and everything is possible…yes! A year that could change all years to come from this day forward! Double wowzer!
Needless to say, they just looked lovingly at me with those beautiful, brown puppy-dog eyes and waited for their morning biscuit oblivious to the fact that I was on cloud nine, ten and eleven. My only audience and they weren’t the least bit interested in the concept of ‘endless possibilities.’ Undaunted, I gave them each a treat, patted them on the head and decided to share with you instead.
My feeling of utopia actually started December 31st as I was talking to one of my best friends, whom, from all outward appearances has “their act together,” as the saying goes. However, they were disappointed because they felt they hadn’t accomplished anything during the year. Quite honestly, I was surprised to hear the lamenting of regrets. It left me feeling disappointed for them and inwardly examining the past twelve months of my life.
Being honest with her and myself, I shared that I felt like I had a devil on one shoulder saying, “You had an entire year to get things done and you did nothing!” At the same time however, I have an angel sitting on my other shoulder saying, “Bulldookie! You accomplished a lot this year. And the best part is you’ve got a brand new year to kick some butt!” (Actually, she didn’t say butt… I’m paraphrasing.)
Then I realized more of you might be feeling slightly disappointed too, and that’s okay because there is a plan. It’s certainly not a new concept, but one worthy of putting into action. Simply put… it’s a Bucket List, not to be confused with a resolution list to which most resolutions don’t survive the first 72 hours. A Bucket List encompasses your desires over a lifetime.
Okay, let’s get started. First thing you’ll need is a bucket. Bear with me; I’m only considering the best receptacle to hold all your lists. Yes, you will conceivably have more than one. Why limited yourself? Let me explain. You might want to write a list about career goals. For instance, hosting Saturday Night Live… oh, wait… that’s me. How about vacation goals like spending a week on a dude ranch? Oops… me again. Seriously folks, take time to stretch beyond your ‘instant gratification’ thinking pattern and put together a list of desires/goals/plans you’d like to accomplish before you die. Takes the pressure off when they’re stretched over a lifetime, doesn’t it? Of course, more immediate goals will be on a ‘short’ list with longer range plans on another list.
Now, start by considering all the facets of your life: health, family, home, career, financial, travel, recreation… and the list goes on. Then write goals for each. Let’s say you want to be fluent in Swahili? Put it on your list. Invent a better mousetrap? Write it down. How about dancing in a music video, taking a trip across county on a bicycle, meeting your favorite A-list celebrity, or swimming with sharks? It doesn’t matter what’s on your Bucket List because it’s what you want to accomplish in your lifetime.
Remember friends, it’s never too late to start experi
encing your desires…never too late to start living your dreams.
Can you imagine…being fluent in Swahili?
Losing It
Column #277, Published 1-26-12
How much will you gain by losing your urge to talk back; to tell someone off; to give someone a piece of your mind?
How much will you gain by losing the need to spread gossip; to put down others because they aren’t like you; to take people for granted?
How much will you gain by losing the urge to tell lies; to blatantly spread rumors; to manipulate a situation to your advantage?
How much will you gain by losing the need to always be right; to prove something to others; to prove something to yourself?
How much will you gain by losing the urge to hold on to a grudge; to refuse forgiveness; to devise revenge?
How much will you gain by losing the need to worry about everything; to control everything; to control everyone in your life?
How much will you gain by losing the urge to react in anger; to explode over trivialness; to work yourself into a fury?
How much will you gain by losing it? Losing all of it…with just a snap of your