Their foreheads touched as he pulled her even tighter against him, her legs naturally went around his waist. And they sat there, in an intimate embrace just looking at one another. And again, his heart slammed with the idea that he was finally home, finally exactly where he wanted to be. In her arms.
He closed his eyes and began a slow rhythm of love-making. She smiled faintly as he pulled her tightly against him and claimed her. The only thought that crossed his mind was that he would be happy to stay inside her forever.
The moment was gone too soon. His body was already wanting to take her again and again until they were both exhausted. He sagged against her and sighed, his body still humming with the aftermath of the life-shattering encounter.
“I love you,” Kacey whispered against his cheek as she gave him a kiss. It should have been expected. Hadn’t he thought the same thing over and over again? But for some reason he froze. Severe dehydration after sex did that to a man. So he stared at her, a blank stare, and then pushed away and sat up. Suddenly feeling like a nervous idiot.
“Travis?” She rubbed his back.
“Oh God, I’m such an idiot.” He needed to say those words but there was something so wrong about only admitting his true feelings after she’d just given her body to him. She was so much more than sex, so much more than one moment.
She jerked her hand back. “What?”
“I’m an idiot. I’m so sorry, Kace.” How could he explain to her the depth of his feelings? She needed to know it wasn’t about sex. It was about something so much more. Something he was unable to describe.
He turned and looked at her face, unable to meet her gaze. He should have been the one to say it first. He was better than that, and she deserved better than this. He nervously glanced away.
Suddenly insecure, he walked to the bathroom and shut the door quietly. He just needed time to think, time to decide the right words to say so he didn’t screw up the best thing that had ever happened to him.
****
Kacey was numb. For the second time in her life she experienced utter loss. A loss so huge that she couldn’t even cry.
Was she cursed to always have bad sexual experiences? Not that the experience itself was awful. It was the exact opposite, perfect, wonderful. Life-altering and then, nothing.
He’d stared into space.
He’d put his head in his hands.
And he’d walked away.
Just like Jake.
The knot in her throat made it hard for her to breathe. She grabbed her discarded clothes and ran out of the room.
She locked the door to the guest room and slid against it, the tears finally coming, and with them, pain she never knew possible.
The pain of a heart being broken, a girl being rejected by yet another man in the Titus family.
And suddenly she felt exactly like a stripper, like one of those girls Jake salivated after. Quickly, she packed up her things, changed her clothes, and peeked out into the hallway.
Travis was nowhere to be found. It was nearing midnight. She could see if any flights were going out and just hang out at the airport. Anything was better than facing Travis, than seeing the disgust on his face.
She hurried down the stairs and out the front door and ran directly into Grandma.
“Grandma,” she blurted, suddenly feeling ashamed and guilty.
“Honey, where you off to? Where’s Travis?”
Kacey fought hard to keep the tears from falling down her cheeks, but the minute Grandma reached out and touched her, she shattered into a million pieces.
“He doesn’t love me,” she wailed on Grandma’s shoulder.
“Yes, he does,” Grandma said simply.
Kacey shook her head and tried to clear her throat. “No, he doesn’t. It was just like Jake and then…”
“What?” Grandma peeled Kacey from her shoulder and held her head between her hands. “What happened with Jake, honey girl?”
“We slept together, in college, my first time.” She hiccupped. “The night my parents died. And he f-froze. He just sat there afterwards. I was so vulnerable and he just sat there, and then he left w-without saying goodbye.” Tears freely flowed down her cheeks. It was as if everything that had happened so many years ago was finally coming to the surface. All the hurt, the anger, the betrayal.
“And Travis, you and he?” Grandma asked softly.
Kacey nodded and continued, “And he just sat there! He called himself an idiot and went into the bathroom!”
Grandma put her hands on her hips. “I may be old, but that is no way to leave your bed partner.”
“Grandma,” Kacey said, managing a tiny smile. “It doesn’t matter. I’m leaving.”
“You can’t!” Grandma grasped her hands tight within hers. “You need to talk to him. He loves you. I know him, he does! He’s just scared!”
“And I’m not?” Kacey yelled. “I’m terrified!”
Grandma gave her a peculiar look. “Does Travis know how Jake reacted that night?”
Kacey slowly shook her head, feeling a little guilty for allowing her hurt heart to put them in the same category.
“Go,” Grandma said, surprising her. ”Get on your plane. I’ll take care of this.”
Kacey shook her head. “There’s nothing to do but pick up the broken pieces.”
“There’s always something to do.” Grandma handed her the keys to the BMW. “Just leave it at the airport, and I’ll have Wescott take me down there to retrieve it tomorrow.”
“Thanks, Grandma. I love you.”
“I love you too, honey.” Grandma kissed her cheek and walked quite briskly into the house. The last thing Kacey heard before she started the car was Grandma yelling at the top of her lungs at Travis.
Kacey pulled out of the driveway feeling completely raw as she left the house, full of memories for the second time in her life, knowing with certainty that it was not in her future.
“Sorry, Mom, Dad.” Kacey wiped the tears from her eyes. “I guess I’m just not good enough.”
Chapter Thirty
Travis stared at the running water in the sink for what felt like hours. Really, it was probably thirty minutes, but he needed to get his speech perfect. Words often failed him, but he was going to try to convey the raw emotional need he had to be with Kacey, and not just for one night.
But forever.
“Travis!” Grandma’s voice echoed into his room. What the heck was she doing back?
“Coming.” He ran into his room and put on a pair of jeans just in time for Grandma to come bursting through the door.
“You are officially my least favorite grandson.”
Travis smirked. “So I was your favorite before?”
“You are a jackass.”
“Grandma, I hardly think swearing is appropriate—”
“She’s gone.”
Travis felt his world tilting. He sat on the bed and put his hands over his face. “What do you mean she’s gone? She was just here.”
“She left.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re a jackass.”
His heart constricted. “What did I do? I mean, I didn’t say I love you back, but I was so ashamed of myself for not having said it first, for taking her to bed and not telling her how much…” His voice went hoarse and then silent.
“Well, she thinks you’re ashamed of her.”
“What?” Travis bolted from the bed. “That’s impossible! I didn’t say anything hurtful!”
“I know.” Grandma sighed. “That’s the problem. You didn’t say anything at all.”
“What?”
“Just like Jake.”
“Pardon?” He clenched his fist and began to sweat.
“He and Kacey… She never told you?”
Travis shook his head. “I know they slept together, but…”
“When all was said and done, Jake grabbed his stuff, said he was sorry and walked out of her life.”
“But…”
/> Grandma patted his hand. “You, my dear boy, had the exact reaction. Your motives were different. I know this and you know this. Kacey, however, feels like you think you made a mistake, and now she’s at the airport.”
“You let her go!” he roared, ashamed that he was yelling at his grandmother.
“No.” She turned and walked to the door. “You did.”
Travis didn’t know what to say. Instead he pushed passed his grandmother and ran down the stairs. It wasn’t until he was outside that he realized he didn’t have a shirt on. Cursing, he ran back into the house and grabbed a t-shirt from the laundry room.
His truck wouldn’t be fast enough. He would never catch her in that thing. It was huge and hard enough to weave in and out of traffic.
He ran into the garage, nearly out of breath. The black and white Ducati sat quite comfortably in the middle.
“That’ll do.” He grabbed the helmet and sped off in the direction of the airport.
The whole time he weaved in and out of traffic he prayed he wasn’t going to be too late. How could he be so stupid? He hadn’t been thinking.
He still smelled like Kacey.
Her perfume was intoxicating, and it seemed every time he angled his head, he could still smell her on his skin. Feel the touch of her lips against his.
“Damn.” He pulled into the Portland airport and rushed to short-term parking.
He almost forgot to take his helmet with him and tripped trying to get the bike to stand alone, but finally he was through the entrance and looking frantically for Kacey’s brown hair.
She had to be flying Alaskan Airlines, either that or Southwest. He ran to the ticket counter. “Have you seen a girl with brown hair, brown eyes, really cute…” Oh God, he was officially turning into the guy in the movies who breaks down at an international airport.
The lady shook her head. “I’m sorry, our last flight left an hour ago.”
“Right.”
He went to the Southwest counter. “Have you seen—”
“Sir, you need to get in line.”
“Listen, I’m not here to fly. I’m here to—”
“Sir! Get in line!”
Travis slammed his hand against the counter. Which, apparently, the lady didn’t like. Within minutes, security guards were escorting him back outside.
Fabulous.
“I’m looking for my—”
What was she? His friend? Never, she would never be just a friend. She was more than a girlfriend. She was his lover… his — well, he wanted her to be his wife.
He smiled, despite being escorted out of the airport. He grabbed the security guard closest to him and grinned. “I’m going to marry her!”
“Good for you, son.” The guy gave him a perplexed look. “Now, we need you to leave.”
Dejected, Travis went to the bike, then pulled out his cell and dialed Kacey’s number. It went straight to voicemail.
Which meant only one thing.
She was flying, in the air, back home, and he didn’t even get to say he loved her.
Chapter Thirty-one
Kacey laid her head back against the wall.
No flights out tonight meant she had to sleep in the airport. Sure, she could go to a hotel, but for some reason she wanted to feel sorry for herself. Well, there was that and the small opportunity she had to get an earlier flight than the one Jake was on.
That was just what she needed.
To sit next to Jake after sleeping with his brother.
Her life was like a dramatic TV show. She shook her head and shivered.
The airport was desolate. It was doing nothing for her horrible mood. Maybe she really should go somewhere else so she didn’t end up crying by herself in the corner. That would be the ultimate of lows.
Pulling out her cell phone she pressed Menu, but the screen was black. She shook it — not that shaking a phone really did anything.
Dead.
Just like her heart.
Figured.
She threw it back into her purse and sighed. Maybe if she just closed her eyes for a bit she could get some sleep.
But the minute they fluttered closed she heard a voice.
“Hey…”
Her eyes flickered open. “Jake?”
“I know, I know. I’m supposed to be at the condo or wherever, but I got bored, and Grandma left saying something about having dessert with the neighbor away from the watchful eyes of the family, leaving me even more bored. Then Mom and Dad were treating it like another honeymoon, if you know what I mean. Anyway, I decided nothing was worse than that, so I drove home.”
“Oh.” Kacey shifted in her seat and broke eye contact.
“But then,” Jake continued to talk. “Travis was gone and Grandma was muttering something about her damn grandson. I can’t help but think she was referring to me.”
Kacey snorted.
“What?” Jake nudged her. “No flippant remark? No agreeing? What’s wrong? You sick or something?”
She shook her head and then burst into tears.
“God, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I didn’t know you were sad. I’m such a selfish bastard sometimes. What’s wrong? Are you sick? Are you okay?” He pulled her into his arms and held her.
It felt foreign, not at all like Travis. It was comforting to an extent but only as a friend, not a soul mate.
She shuddered, trying to gain her breath. “Nothing. It’s fine, it’s…” She continued to sob even though she was willing herself to stop.
“Kace?” Jake whispered into her hair. “What’s wrong? What happened?”
“Travis.”
“I’ll kill him.” Jake pushed her away and rose to his feet. “Did he do this to you? Is that why you’re crying? That son of—”
“No, no.” Kacey sniffed. “It was me too. It was both of us. But in the end it was him.”
“Huh?” Jake crouched to her eye level. “Why don’t you start at the beginning?”
He had no clue. This perfect specimen of a man had no clue the hurt he caused. Well, he was about to.
“Actually…” Her voice waivered. “It starts with you.”
“Me?”
She nodded. “Yup, the night you left me and never came back.”
Surprisingly, she was holding herself together quite well, considering.
“You’re referring to the night I live to regret every day of my life. That night?”
She wasn’t sure if that was a compliment or a really cruel thing to say.
Jake cursed and wrapped his arm around her. “I was scared.”
“What?” Of all the things he could have said, that was the least expected.
“Yes, I know. Jake Titus, scared? But it’s the truth. I knew I’d messed up. I knew we were friends, and of course we were attracted to one another. I mean, how could we not be? We were inseparable, and let me tell you it’s nearly impossible for girls and guys to be friends.”
Kacey sighed into his shoulder.
“I knew I’d messed up and I didn’t know how to fix it. For once in my life I didn’t have a plan. I had no idea what to do. Should I apologize? Should I do it again?” He chuckled. “Should I say I loved you? I just didn’t know, so I did the only thing I could at such an immature age.”
“You left,” Kacey finished.
Jake nodded. He looked at her watery eyes and cursed. “I was an ass.”
Kacey laughed. “That we can agree on.”
“I never said I was sorry.”
Her lip trembled.
Jake reached out and tilted her chin. “I am though. I’m so sorry, Kace. I never meant to hurt you. I was stupid and young and well, sometimes it’s easier to be selfish and cruel than to be real. I chose the stupid route, hoping it would just make everything go away.”
“I’m sorry too,” Kacey mumbled. “I should have done more, said more, or even said no. I just, I don’t know…”
Jake pulled her to her feet. “Kace, let’s both agree that bad choices were
made, but let’s move past it. I don’t know what Travis did, but I do know one thing. That kid has been obsessed with you ever since you were old enough to run away when he threw rocks.” He leaned in and kissed her cheek. “It will work out, promise.”
Kacey nodded, still not trusting her voice to speak.
“And, I think we’ve waited long enough. Let’s drive home.”
“It’s four hours.”
“We’ll pay someone.” He shrugged.
“Heartless billionaire.”
Jake threw his head back and laughed. “Heartless, no. Billionaire, yes.” With a wink he wrapped his arm around her and led her back through the airport.
And directly into the lion’s den.
Paparazzi cameras went crazy. The flashing lights blinded Kacey so much that she tripped. Jake grabbed her arm and, with a curse, tried to cover her with his jacket as they walked to the waiting cars.
He looked down the street and cursed. “Come on, this way.”
Kacey followed in an emotional haze as Jake led her back inside and pulled out his cell phone.
“I don’t care if it’s past midnight, just get a car down here now.” He threw his phone onto the chair and sat down.
“I’m sorry, Kace. I had no idea. I mean, we’ve been here for the whole weekend without actually running into the paparazzi. I only told the ones I hired.”
Kacey sat with a huff and put her hand on his back. “It’s okay, it’s not like you’re a normal person. You hired people to take pictures of us? You really are an ass sometimes, Jake.”
Jake lifted his eyes to glare at her.
“But it’s not like you had to hire anyone. People follow you everywhere.” She shrugged then gave him a small nudge. “You are Seattle’s most infamous bachelor, not to mention a celebrity in these parts.”
“Right.” He looked down at his hands.
“Jake,” Kacey said as she rested her head on his shoulder. “It’s going to be fine. The car will be here soon and then we can go home. Besides, isn’t this what you wanted?”
“Home,” he repeated and shook his head. “I thought it was. But not like this, Kacey.”
With a sigh he nodded his head and said, “Home sounds good. Thanks, Kace. Sorry for dragging you into all this. You know they’re going to think we’re together.”