CHAPTER IX.
MEETS A PAIR OF BLUE EYES.
I kept pretty quiet the remainder of that summer--didn't even attendchurch for several weeks. In fact, I got father to give me a vacation,and beat a retreat into the country during the month of July, to anaunt of mine, who lived on a small farm with her husband, her son offourteen, and a "hand." Their house was at least a mile from thenearest neighbor's, and as I was less afraid of Aunt Jerusha than ofany other being of her sex, and as there was not another frock,sun-bonnet, or apron within the radius of a mile, I promised myself amonth of that negative bliss which comes from retrospection, solitude,and the pleasure of following the men about the harvest-field. Sittingquietly under some shadowing tree, with my line cast into the stillpool of a little babbling trout-brook, where it was held in somehollow of nature's hand, I had leisure to forget the past and to makegood resolutions for the future. Belle Marigold was forever lost tome. She was Mrs. Hencoop; and Fred had knocked me down because I hadbeen so unfortunate as to lose my presence of mind at his wedding.All was over between us.
The course now open for me to pursue was to forever steel my heart tothe charms of the other sex, to attend strictly to business, to growrich and honored, while, at the same time, I hardened into a sort ofgranite obelisk, incapable of blushing, faltering, or stepping onother people's toes.
One day, as the men were hauling in the "loaded wains" from the fieldsto the great barn, I sat under my favorite tree, as usual, waiting fora bite. Three speckled beauties already lay in a basin of water at myside, and I was thinking what a pleasant world this would be werethere no girls in it, when suddenly I heard a burst of silverylaughter!
Looking up, there, on the opposite side of the brook, stood two youngladies! They were evidently city girls. Their morning toilets were theperfection of simple elegance--hats, parasols, gloves, dresses, thevery cream of style.
Both of them were pretty--one a dark, bright-eyed brunette, the othera blonde, fair as a lily and sweet as a rose. Their faces sparkledwith mischief, but they made a great effort to resume their dignity.
I jumped to my feet, putting one of them--my feet, I mean--in thebasin of water I had for my trout.
"Oh, it's too bad to disturb you, sir," said the dark-eyed one. "Youwere just having a nibble, I do believe. But we have lost our way. Weare boarding at the Widow Cooper's, and came out for a ramble in thewoods, and got lost; and here, just as we thought we were on the rightway home, we came to this naughty little river, or whatever you callit, and can't go a step farther. Is there no way of getting across it,sir?"
"There is a bridge about a quarter of a mile above here, but to get toit you will have to go through a field in which there is a very crossbull. Then there is a log just down here a little ways--I'll show itto you, ladies"; and tangling my beautiful line inextricably in myembarrassment, I threw down my fishing-rod and led the way, I on oneside of the stream and they on the other.
"Oh, oh!" cried Blue-Eyes, when we reached the log. "I'll be sure toget dizzy and fall off."
"Nonsense!" said Black-Eyes, bravely, and walked over without winking.
"I shall never--never dare!" screamed Blue-Eyes.
"Allow me to assist you, miss," I said, in my best style, going on thelog and reaching out my hand to steady her.
She laid her little gray glove in my palm, and put one tiny slipper onthe log, and then she stood, the little coquette! shrinking andlaughing, and taking a step and retreating, and I falling head overears in love with her, deeper and deeper every second. I do believe,if the other one hadn't been there, I would have taken her right up inmy arms and carried her over. Well, Black-Eyes began to scold, and so,at last, she ventured across, and then she said she was tired andthirsty, and did wish she had a glass of milk; and so I asked her togo to the house, and rest a few minutes, and Aunt Jerusha would givethem some milk. You'd better believe aunt opened her eyes, when shesaw me marching in as bold as brass, with two stylish young ladies;while, the moment I met her sly look, all my customary confusion--overwhich I had contrived to hold a tight rein--ran rampant and jerked atmy self-possession until I lost control of it!
"These young ladies, Aunt Jerusha," I stammered, "would like a glassof milk. They've got lost, and don't know where they are, and can'tfind their way back, and I expect I'll have to show them the way."
"They're very welcome," said aunt, who was kindness itself, and shewent into the milk-pantry and brought out two large goblets ofmorning's milk, with the rising cream sticking around the inside.
I started forward gallantly, took the server from aunt's hand, andconveyed it, with almost the grace of a French waiter, across thelarge kitchen to where the two beautiful beings were resting in thechairs which I had set for them. Unfortunately, being blinded by mybashfulness, I caught my toe in a small hole in aunt's rag carpet, theresult being that I very abruptly deposited both glasses of milk,bottom up, in the lap of Blue-Eyes. A feeling of horror overpowered meas I saw that exquisite toilet in ruins--those dainty ruffles, thosecunning bows the color of her eyes, submerged in the lacteal fluid.
I think a ghastly pallor must have overspread my face as I stoodmotionless, grasping the server in my clenched hands.
What do you think Blue-Eyes said? _This_ is the way she "gave mefits." Looking up prettily to my aunt, she says:
"Oh, madam, I am _so_ sorry for your carpet."
"Your dress!" exclaimed Aunt Jerusha.
"Never mind _that_, madam. It can go to the laundry."
"Well, I never!" continued aunt, flying about for a towel, and wipingher off as well as she could; "but John Flutter is so careless. He's_always_ blundering. He means well enough, but he's bashful. You'dthink a clerk in a dry-goods store would get over it some time now,wouldn't you? Well, young ladies, I'll get some more milk for you; butI won't trust it in _his_ hands."
When Aunt Jerusha let the cat out of the bag about my bashfulness,Blue-Eyes flashed, at me from under her long eyelashes a glance soroguish, so perfectly infatuating, that my heart behaved like athermometer that is plunged first into a tea-kettle and then intosnow; it went up into my throat, and then down into my boots. I stillgrasped the server and stood there like a revolving lantern--oneminute white, another red. Finally my heart settled into my boots. Itwas evident that fate was against me. I was _doomed_ to go on leadinga blundering existence. My admiration for this lovely girl was alreadya thousand times stronger than any feeling I had ever had for BelleMarigold. Yet how ridiculous I must appear to her. How politely shewas laughing at me.
The sense of this, and the certainty that I was born to blunder, camehome to me with crushing weight. I turned slowly to Aunt Jerusha, whowas bringing fresh milk, and said, with a simplicity to which pathosmust have given dignity:
"Aunt, will you show them the way to Widow Cooper's? I am going to thebarn to hang myself," and I walked out.
"Is he in earnest?" I heard Blue-Eyes inquire.
"Wall, now, I shouldn't be surprised," avowed Aunt Jerusha. "He's beenpowerful low-spirited lately. You see, ladies, he was born thatbashful that life is a burden to him."
I walked on in the direction of the barn; I would not pause to listenor to cast a backward glance. Doubtless, my relative told them of myprevious futile attempt to poison myself--perhaps became so interestedin relating anecdotes of her nephew's peculiar temperament, that sheforgot the present danger which threatened him. At least, it was sometime before she troubled herself to follow me to ascertain if mythreat meant anything serious.
When she finally arrived at the large double door, standing wide openfor the entrance of the loaded wagons, she gave a sudden shriek.
I was standing on the beam which supported the light flooring of thehay-loft; beneath was the threshing-floor; above me the great raftersof the barn, and around one of these I had fastened a rope, the otherterminus of which was knotted about my neck.
I stood ready for the fatal leap.
As she screamed, I slightly raised my hand:
"Si
lence, Aunt Jerusha, and receive my parting instructions. TellBlue-Eyes that I love her madly, but not to blame herself for myuntimely end. The ruin of her dress was only the last drop in thecup--the last straw on the camel's back. Farewell!" and as she threwup her arms and shrieked to me to desist, I rolled up my eyes--andsprang from the beam.
For a moment I thought myself dead. The experience was different fromwhat I had anticipated. Instead of feeling choked, I had a pain in mylegs, and it seemed to me that I had been shut together like anopera-glass. Still I knew that I must be dead, and I kept very quietuntil the sound of little screams and gurgles of--what?--_laughter_,smote my ears!
Then I opened my eyes and looked about. I was not dangling in the airoverhead, but standing on the threshing-floor, with a bit of brokenhalter about my neck. The rope had played traitor and given waywithout even chafing my throat.
"I STOOD READY FOR THE FATAL LEAP."]
I dare say the sight of me, standing there with my eyes closed andlooking fully convinced that I was dead, must have been vastlyamusing to the two young ladies, who had followed Aunt Jerusha to thedoor. They laughed as if I had been the prince of clowns, and had justperformed a most funny trick in the ring. I began to feel as if I had,too.
Aunt rushed forward and gave me a shake.
"Another blunder, John," she said; "it's plain as the nose on a man'sface that Providence never intended you to commit suicide."
And then Blue-Eyes, repressing her mirth, came forward, half shy andhalf coaxing, and said to me:
"How my sister and I would feel if you had killed yourself on ouraccount! Come! do please show us the way to our boarding-house. Mammawill be so anxious about us."
Cunning witch! she knows, how to twist a man around her little finger.
"Come," she continued, "let _me_ untie this ugly rope."
And I did let her, and picked up my hat to walk with them to the WidowCooper's.
They made themselves very agreeable on the way--so that I would thinkno more of hanging myself, I suppose.
Only one more little incident occurred on the road. We met a tramp. Hewas a roughly-dressed fellow, with a straw hat such as farmers wear,whose broad brim nearly hid his face. He sauntered up impudently, and,before we could pass him, he chucked Blue-Eyes under the chin. Inless than half a second he was flying backward over the rail fence,although he was a tall fellow, more than my weight.
"Now," said I proudly to myself, "she will forget that unlucky circusperformance in the barn."
Imagine my sensations when she turned on me with the fire flashing outof those soft blue eyes.
"What did you fling my brother over the fence for?"
That was what she asked me.