Read The Bridge to Holy Cross Page 37


  Pasha was silent. “Alexander, there is no hope. There are five hundred thousand men over that hill.”

  “Yes, and thirteen million men are coming over that hill to kill them.”

  “Yes, but what about you and me?”

  “I need your unit’s arms.”

  “So you’ll have my arms. You’ve got nineteen men. What on earth are you thinking?”

  Alexander lowered his voice to a whisper. “Don’t worry about what I’m thinking. Just…”

  “Just what?”

  “Pasha, I need to get inside Germany. I need to live long enough to do it.”

  “Why?”

  Because the Americans are coming to Berlin. Because the Americans are going to liberate Germany, and they’re going to liberate the POW camps, and eventually they’re going to liberate me. But Alexander didn’t say any of this.

  “You’ve lost your mind,” said Pasha.

  “Yes.”

  Pasha stared at Alexander for a long time, in the crackling, wet, absorbing woods, standing miserably next to him, his cigarette burning bleakly to ash between his ravaged fingers. “Alexander, don’t you know about the Germans? Don’t you know anything?”

  “I know everything, but I still have hope. Now more than ever.” He glanced at Pasha. “Why do you think I found you?”

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  “So you could torture a dying man?”

  “No, Pasha. I’ll help you, too. Just—we’ve got to get out of here. You and I. You have medical kits?”

  “Yes, plenty of bandages, plenty of sulfa, morphine, even some penicillin.”

  “Good, we’ll need it all. What about food?”

  “We’ve got canned everything. Dried milk even. Dried eggs. Sardines. Ham. Bread.”

  “Canned bread?” Alexander nearly smiled.

  “What haveyou been living on?”

  “The flesh of my men,” replied Alexander. “Are most of your men Russian?”

  “Most of them, yes. But I have ten Germans. What do you propose we do with them? Certainly they are not going to go on your side and fight their own army.”

  “Of course not. That’s unimaginable, isn’t it?”

  Pasha turned away.

  “We’ll take them prisoner,” said Alexander.

  “I thought the penal battalions had a no-prisoner policy?”

  “I make my own policy here in the woods,” replied Alexander, “having been abandoned by my suppliers. Now, are you going to help us or not?”

  Pasha took a last smoke, stubbed out his cigarette and wiped the wet off his face, a useless gesture, Alexander thought. “I will help you. But your lieutenant will not approve. He wants to kill me.”

  “You let me worry about him,” said Alexander.

  Ouspensky was not easy.

  “Are you out of your mind?” he whispered hotly to Alexander, when Alexander outlined his plan for the absorption of Pasha’s unit.

  “You have better ideas?”

  “I thought you said Gronin was coming with supplies?”

  “I lied. Get me my troops, please.”

  “I say we kill the commander, and then lie in wait in the woods until we get arms and men.”

  “I’m not killing the commander, and I’m not waiting for anything. They are not coming.”

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  “Captain, you are not acting according to the rules of engagement. We cannot take the Germans prisoner. We have to kill their commander.”

  “Lieutenant, get me my men and stop this foolishness.”

  “Captain—”

  “Lieutenant! Now!”

  Ouspensky, his face full of squinting suspicion, turned to Pasha, who stood by Alexander’s other side, untied. Ouspensky and Pasha glared at each other for a few moments. “Captain, you’ve untied him?”

  Ouspensky said in a low voice.

  “Why don’t you worry about what you have to worry about, and let me worry about everything else.

  Go!”

  Alexander, Ouspensky and Telikov had fourteen privates and two corporals under their command. With Pasha’s battalion, they would have over sixty men, not including the German prisoners of war. He motioned Pasha to come.

  Pasha said, “My men need to know it’s me when I call to them.”

  “Fine,” said Alexander. “I’ll stand by you, you yell. They’ll know.”

  Ouspensky stood in Alexander’s way. “With all due respect, sir, you are not headed toward the firing line.”

  “I am, Lieutenant,” Alexander said, moving Ouspensky out of the way with his machine gun.

  “Captain,” Ouspensky said, “sir, have you ever played chess? Do you know that in chess you will often sacrifice your Queen to take the opponent’s Queen? His men will kill you and him both.”

  Alexander nodded. “All right, butI’m not the Queen, Ouspensky. They will have to do better than killme

  .”

  “They kill you, they win the game. Let the bastard go by himself. He can stop the bullets with his teeth for all I care. But if something happens to you, we’ve got nobody else.”

  “You’re wrong, Lieutenant. We’ve gotyou . Now look. We are under a direct order to plow through the woods.” He lowered his voice. “And I’ve finally figured out why. It’s because of them—the Vlasovites.

  Stalin wants his Soviet dregs—us—to kill his Soviet dregs—them.” Pasha was standing nearby.

  Alexander didn’t want him to hear. He led Ouspensky away. “We have only one directive—to go forward—and only one responsibility—to save our men. We’re nearly all out. To save our men you’d save Metanov’s life, wouldn’t you?”

  “No,” Ouspensky said. “I’m going to shoot the motherfucker myself.”

  “Nikolai,” Alexander said quietly, “if you touch him, you’ll die. Just so you understand my position and won’t accidentally fly into patriotic fervor, I want you to know your life is at stake. Anything happens to him, anything at all, I will blame you.”

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  “Sir—”

  “Do you understand?”

  “No!”

  “That man is the brother of my wife,” said Alexander.

  Something appeared on Ouspensky’s face. Alexander couldn’t quite place it. Some clarity, some understanding, some completion, almost as if Ouspensky had been waiting for something like this.

  Alexander couldn’t tell, the expression in the eyes was too fleeting. Then Ouspensky said, “I did not know that.”

  “Why would you?”

  Alexander and Pasha began their mission. It was mid-afternoon. Quiet in the woods except for the sound of drizzle on the evergreens. Disturbing, unexplained quiet. A burning branch broke and fell to the ground. It burned reluctantly, dampened by November. Pasha Metanov stood ten meters away from Alexander and yelled, “This is Commander Kolonchak. Can you hear me? Bring me my Lieutenant Borov immediately.”

  There was no sound from the woods. “Hold your fire! And bring me Borov,” he yelled.

  A shot rang out. It narrowly missed Pasha. Alexander closed his eyes and thought, this is crazy. I’m not putting him in front of the firing squad before my own eyes. He called Pasha back, and sent for a corporal to shield Metanov next time he called out for his lieutenant. There was no more fire from the other side. Soon they heard a voice calling, “Commander Kolonchak?”

  “Yes, Borov,” said Pasha.

  “What is the password?”

  Pasha glanced at Alexander. “If they asked you, wouldyou know?”

  “No.”

  “Would you guess?”

  “Don’t play games. This is for the lives of your men.”

  “No, it’s for the lives of yours.”

  “Give him the password, Pasha.”

  “The Queen of Lake Ilmen,” yelled Pasha Metanov, wavin
g a white handkerchief.

  After a pained silence, Alexander said, “Well, I’m sure your sister would appreciate her name being summoned in the heat of battle.”

  Borov walked forward from behind the gray trees not thirty meters away—that’s all that separated the

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  two enemy battalions. In one hour this would have turned into hand-to-hand combat. Alexander had been in the woods too many times, up on hills, in the mud, in the marsh, shooting at phantoms, at shadows, at branches falling. He bowed his head. He was glad that at least for now the fighting would be over. He heard Pasha speaking to Borov, who was disbelieving and reluctant. “Permission not to surrender, sir.”

  “Permission denied,” said Pasha. “You see a way out?”

  “Die with honor,” said Borov.

  Alexander stepped forward. “Tell your men to lay down their arms and come forward.”

  “Captain!” Pasha cut in. “I’ll handle this.” He turned to Borov. “And the Germans are to be taken prisoner.”

  Borov laughed. “We’re surrenderingthem ? They’re going to love this.”

  “They will do as they’re forced to.”

  “What about the rest of us?”

  “We’re going to fight for the Red Army.”

  Borov stepped back with a look of disbelief on his face. “Captain, what’s happening? This is impossible.”

  “What’s happening, Borov, is that I’ve been taken prisoner. And so you have no choice. This is for my life.”

  Borov bowed his own head, as if he truly had no choice.

  A little while later Pasha explained, “Borov will always be loyal to me. He is to me what Ouspensky is to you.”

  “Ouspensky is nothing to me,” said Alexander.

  “Ah, you’re joking.” Pasha paused. They were walking back to the Soviet camp, their men in front of them, the ten Germans with their hands tied. “Alexander, do you trust him?”

  “Who?”

  “Ouspensky.”

  “Inasmuch as I trust anyone.”

  “What does that mean?”

  “What are you getting at?”

  Pasha coughed. “Do you trust him with personal things?”

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  “I trust no one with personal things,” Alexander said, looking straight ahead.

  “That’s good.” Pasha paused. “I don’t know if he can be trusted.”

  “Oh, he’s proven his loyalty to me over the years. He can be trusted. Nonetheless, I don’t.”

  “That’s good,” said Pasha.

  Alexander was right about many things. Soviet reinforcements did not come. And there were no Red Army Imperial uniforms for Pasha and his Russian soldiers. Though he had lost many more than forty-two men himself, he buried his dead in their wet and bloodied resplendent velvet garb. Now he had forty-two men in German uniforms with German haircuts. Alexander ordered them shaved, but they were still in German uniforms.

  Pasha was right about many things. German reinforcements moved to the foot of the mountain looking for their Russian battalion, expecting to find Pasha’s men and instead found Alexander’s battalion and not a Vlasovite in sight. Though their shells and grenades were more plentiful than Alexander’s, Alexander had the advantage, for the first time in his military career, of being at the top of the hill. The German artillery unit was repelled, with difficulty, then an infantry unit was repelled with ease, and his men moved down the mountain, having lost only five soldiers. Alexander said he would never fight again unless it was from a great height.

  Pasha said maybe the first time the Germans had sent in a handful of troops to block Alexander, but next time they would send a thousand, and the time after that ten thousand.

  Pasha was right about many things.

  On the other side of the Holy Cross mountains was more forest and more fighting, and another day brought a heavier artillery, heavier machine-gun fire, more grenades, more shells, less rain, more fire.

  Alexander’s battalion was again reduced by five. The next day brought more Germans, and the battalion became three squads. No bandages, no sulfa helped. His men had no time to construct defenses, pillboxes, trenches. The trees covered them but the trees were felled by mortar fire, by grenades, by shells, and his men were, too. Nothing could sew back their severed limbs.

  After four days, two squads remained. Twenty men. Alexander, Pasha, Ouspensky, Borov and sixteen foot soldiers.

  One of Alexander’s men was bitten by something in the woods. The next day he lay dead. Nineteen men. Back to where they were before Pasha. But they had eight bound prisoners to barter their lives with.

  The German army was not advancing. It certainly wasn’t retreating. Nor were they sitting still. Their singular purpose seemed to lie in finishing off Alexander’s battalion.

  Alexander managed to hold out for a fifth day. But then there were no more bombs, no more shells and the guns were nearly empty. Borov had been killed. Pasha cried when he buried him in the mud under

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  wet leaves.

  Then Sergeant Telikov. Ouspensky cried when they buried Telikov.

  The bandages were gone. The food was gone. They collected rain water into leaves and poured it into their flasks. The morphine and the medic were gone. Alexander bandaged his own men.

  “What now?” asked Pasha.

  “I’m fresh out,” said Alexander.

  Retreat was the only option.

  “We can’t retreat,” Alexander said to Ouspensky, who was ready to turn back.

  “Yes, Lieutenant,” said Pasha. “You know retreat is punishable by death.”

  “Fuck you,” said Ouspensky. “I’d like to punish you by death.”

  Alexander and Pasha exchanged a look. “And you wonder why I chose the Germans over death,” said Pasha.

  “No,” said Ouspensky. “You chose the Germans over your own people, you bastard.”

  “Look at the way our own people are treating their army!” Pasha exclaimed. “They’ve put you in here without any support, they’ve sent you to certain death, and to add insult to your injury, they made surrender a crime against the Motherland! Where have you ever heard of such a thing happening? In what army, in what place and time? You name me where.” Pasha made a scornful sound. “And you ask why.”

  Alexander said, “Oh, Pasha, you take it all so personally. Who do you think cares for our death?”

  He and Pasha mutely glanced at each other, and then Alexander stopped talking. He was sitting on a broken tree, pushed up against another, covered with his wet trench coat, carving a stake with his knife.

  From another tree Ouspensky called to Alexander to stop his useless tasks. Alexander replied that with the stake he was going to catch a fish, eat it himself and let Ouspensky starve for all he cared. Pasha mentioned mournfully that Borov always caught the fish for them, that he was his best friend and his right hand for three years. Ouspensky said, cry me a fucking river Vistula, and Alexander told them both to shut up. Night fell.

  Alexander and Tatiana are playing war hide and seek. Alexander stands very quietly in the woods, listening for her. He can’t hear a thing except for the bugs and ticks and flies and bees. Many insects, no Tatiana. He looks up above him, nothing. Slowly he moves forward. “Oh, Tania,” he calls for her.

  “Where are you, tiny Tania? Where are you? You better have hidden yourself good from me, because I’m getting the feeling that I need to find you.” He is hoping to make her laugh. He stops talking and listens. There is no sound. Sometimes if she is near he hears her cocking the pistol he gave her. But today not a sound.

  “Oh, Tania!” He walks through the woods, turning around every few seconds, watching his back. This

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&nbs
p; game ends once she is behind him, his own gun in his kidney. “Tatia, I forgot to tell you something really important, are you listening?”

  He listens. Not a sound. He smiles.

  Moss lands on his head. She is doing it again. Where did that come from? He immediately looks up. Not there. He looks around. Can’t see her. During this game she puts on his camouflage undershirt and becomes nearly invisible. He is already laughing. “Tatiasha, stop throwing moss at me, because when I find you—” He hears a noise and looks up. Water pours on him from above; not just water, but a whole bucket. He is doused. He swears. The bucket is in full view dangling from a branch, but she is nowhere to be seen. The rope connecting to the bucket descends and disappears behind a fallen log to Alexander’s right. “All right, that’s it. The gloves are off. Just you wait, Tania,” he says, taking off his wet shirt. “You are in so much trouble.” He moves towards the log, and suddenly he hears a little whoosh, and in the next instant he is covered with a white powder that gets into his hair and face. It is flour; now it is moist glue around his wet hair and head. Alexander can’t believe it. How long had she been planning this, to lure him into the woods, to an exact position first for the water, then for the flour? Marveling at her, at what a formidable opponent she makes, Alexander says, “Oh, that’s it, Tania, that’s just it. If you think you were in trouble before, I can’t even tell you what—” He moves towards the log, but hears a soft tread behind him, and without even turning around extends his hand and grabs her as she is at his back. He doesn’t actually grab her, he grabs the gun. Tatiana squeals, lets go of the gun, which remains in his hands, and runs wildly through the woods. He chases her. The forest near this part of the river is sloppy—not the neat pine forest leading from Molotov to Lazarevo, or like the one around their clearing, but overgrown with the underbrush of the oaks and the poplars, the nettles and the moss. The low-hanging branches, the fallen trees slow Alexander down. Nothing slows her down. She jumps over them, passes underneath them, zigzags, and squeals. She even manages to pick up moss and a handful of leaves and throw them back at him.

  He has had enough. “Watch your back!” he yells and flanks her on the side; ignoring the bushes in his way, Alexander jumps over three logs and comes out in front of her, holding the gun and panting. He is covered with water and flour. Tatiana shrieks and turns to run away, but before she can move, Alexander is on her, toppling her flat on the mossy ground. “Where do you think you’re going?” he pants, holding her down as she tries to get away. “What do you think you’re doing, you clever girl, too clever by half for your own good, where are you going to go now?” He rubs his floured cheek against her clean face.