Chapter 44 Day 34 A Talk with Dyn
Three days ago Rafe turned in the true log of the Lost Star and his report to Min. As I've mentioned, it added little to the stories of the Four Shipmates, save the hints of a Fifth Shipmate, which we rather hoped Min would never notice. Other than that, its most notable feature was three, several-year-long stretches of blankness – no ship readings at all – which shouldn't be possible. Rafe admitted to being unable to explain how the ship's automatic recorders could be shut down since they were so deeply integrated with the operation of every system aboard the ship. And yet, this very lack of evidence was a strong hint that there was something in the Four Shipmate's stories. The problem was that this evidence added little to our knowledge, save that their voyages – even the blank ones – often started or ended in Kintrine orbit, meaning it'd be a likely starting point to look for answers. But that starting point was almost two years sailing away.
She thanked Rafe for all his work, and said she'd look it over and if she had any questions, she'd get back to him. So, with the report now in her hands, the question of what to do or say to Dyn became more pressing.
Dyn, I'll admit, is a mystery. As close as he was to Captain Miccall, he's always been a very shy and retiring person with everyone else. He was essentially, Miccall's shadow. Perhaps he was always a fragile soul, but with the death of Miccall, he's closed himself in even more, so the last thing I'd want to do was drag him into the spotlight. But not knowing how soon or how closely Min would study the recovered log, or how closely she'd grill Rafe, I wanted to have a word with him about the log if only to make sure he'd not be taken off guard – even though, like Rafe, he seemed to know just about everything that goes on within the ship. I was, however, reluctant to summon him for a meeting, which would be unusual for me and likely put him off. So I let it ride, until I happened to find Dyn alone in the screen and status light lit environmental control room working at his control panel.
'Evening Dyn,' I said, as he turned to see me at the door.
'Evening Wil. Making your rounds?'
'Aye, useless I know, but it's a ritual now.'
He nodded. Never one for conversation.
'Are you very busy or can we have a little chat?'
He shrugged. I decided to take that as a yes, and slid the door-panel closed behind me.
'First off, I want you to know that this is just between you and me, and will go no further.'
'What's this about?' he asked watching me, warily.
'I believe you're aware of my efforts to recover the true log...'
He nodded.
'And I'm certain you realize that Rafe is not only good, but can be relied on to keep secrets...'
He nodded again, growing wary.
'I'm pretty sure you can guess what Rafe found, but I'll just say it anyway. He believes there was, in addition to the Four Shipmates, one more crew member who was aboard the Lost Star during all the years Captain Miccall was in command of it, and possibly before. A Fifth Shipmate, so to speak, who is most likely you.'
He said nothing, watching me. So I pressed on.
'You also know Min's determined to find out all she can about who killed her parents and why. It seems clear that the trail leads directly into the past lives of the Four Shipmates. And I'll add that whoever is behind her parents' murder – and there's no doubt in my mind that it was murder – is also determined to kill her too, so this is not an exercise in academic curiosity. It's a question of life and death. That makes it important for me to know if you were along during those years and can perhaps throw some light on the subject. I've no doubt about your loyalty to the ship, Tallith or myself, but if Rafe is right, you'd seem to know a whole lot more about all this that you've let on to. And so, you'd be able to help Tallith not only find the answers she's looking for, but perhaps save her life as well,' I paused, but he just watched me, a shadow etched in the lights of his control panel.
'Neither I nor Rafe have mentioned this possible Fifth Shipmate to her, or your possible connection with those old days, and, I assure you, neither of us will do so voluntarily – without your permission. Truth be told, I'm not anxious for her to find those answers, at least not right away. I think it'd be best just to let them go, and with Rafe's help, disappear into the Unity's 900 billion. But... But that's not going to make orbit with her as things stand now. And, well, it's possible that in looking over the recovered logs and reading Rafe's summary, she'll discover the Fifth Shipmate on her own and either confront you, Rafe or me about that. With that in mind, I'm wondering where you stand. Are you willing to help Min? Or will you help me somehow steer her away from danger? In any event, I want to emphasize that your secret is safe with me and Rafe. It's your choice how you wish to deal with this. You're an old shipmate and my first loyalty is to you, Dyn,' and I left it at that.
He sat in silence for what must have been a minute or more, and then, staring off into the darkness, he spoke.
'The shipmates kept their secret simply by not telling anyone,' he said at last in his quiet voice turning to me. 'At the beginning, when they needed his help, they – the three others – told Fen everything. You see, he was not originally part of the struggle the others were enmeshed in. He was brought into their secrets only because it was necessary for him to know. He was their pilot and navigator. He needed to know. But he also knew that the others would stop at nothing to preserve their secret. Stop at nothing. The rest of the crews never knew about the underlying dynamics of what was going on. As far as they knew, we were just drift traders with dealings with all sorts of ruthless people, and much of what went on was typical of such dealings. If you deal with pirates, you can expect to have to deal like pirates, if you get my drift.
'Anyway, the core conflict, the one that drove the shipmates, was always an internal affair. And however deadly the conflict was waged, both sides were in agreement that the essential secret had to be preserved, though the other side could never be certain the Shipmates would keep it. Which is why, I suppose, Min's parents were killed a half a century after giving up the fight. Their enemies could never be certain the secret would be kept.
'As for the secret they kept, well, it is one worth keeping; a gold mine for a few, a disaster from many, and for those involved, a secret of the utmost importance. Even as they fought fiercely and to the death, they'd all die rather than reveal the shared secret.
'And as I said, the crews of those ships – and the Lost Star was only one of the ships that the Shipmates sailed on – were often entangled in the fighting of those early days, but they were more or less innocent bystanders – hard cases, mind you – well paid smugglers, pirates or mercenaries, but they had no knowledge of what was really going on. And since the struggle, on the surface, anyway, was a familiar one to those involved, the real issues could remain unsuspected. But in the end, the four came to realize that they couldn't continue to fight head on, and needed to get lost before they could resume the fight. They got lost, and in the end, got old as well, and perhaps even wise, and the embers of passion cooled to grey ashes.'
He turned to look at me. 'So you see Wil, I've nothing to offer, except a warning. The secret leads to death. The more you know, the closer to death you stand. If you can keep Tallith from pursuing it, you'd be doing her a great favor. If I thought I could keep her from pursuing it, I'd try. But I know her pretty well, if only because I knew her parents very well, and if you can't, I certainly wouldn't be able to either. And if I tried, I'd be putting myself in the position of either lying to her or defying her. I'd rather not find myself in that position.'
'Do you know their secret?' I asked quietly.
'Some, but not all of it. But I'm no different than anyone who does. I can't tell you. And really, if there's anyone who can discover it, it's likely Tallith, for I'm certain some provisions had been made to carry on the struggle, though what exactly they'd be, I couldn't say. But, you see, I was never interested in the struggle. I was only interested in Fen. Tal
lith will have to find her own way.'
I shrugged. 'I can't argue that. Hopefully with finding her own way comes wisdom as well. Still, I wanted to at least prepare you, should she find her way to you.'
'I appreciate that, Wil, but you needn't worry. If she should discover my shadow in the log, well, she'd have to find me if she wanted to learn more. And I'm hard to actually find, and even if she did, she'd learn no more about the Four Shipmates than you have. Still, I'd rather not have to avoid Tallith, so I'd appreciate it if you and Rafe kept this to yourselves. I'll stay in the shadows as I've always done,' he said, adding with a faint smile, 'I'm more of a shadow than anything else.'
I decided there was nothing to be gained by pressing him. I suppose I might've tried harder, but it's hard to pin something down with someone as evasive as Dyn. He's simply too nice to treat harshly and too closed up to get anything out of him without sounding harsh. On the other hand, knowing that he knows the secret, I had to believe that he'd steer us clear of danger should we find ourselves too close to the uncharted reefs of this secret conflict. And that was a comfort.