Bethany smiled at the memory. Her mom had been so patient with her. She hoped that she would be just as patient with her own child. Her heart skipped a beat. Was there even a possibility that she would have children? She’d given up on that dream somewhere many years ago, trapped in the underground darkness.
“Maybe, in the future, that is something we can talk about,” Drake’s voice spoke quietly in her mind. He sounded strained, as though it was difficult to speak.
She shivered. It felt weird having him talk to her while she was naked. “Could you give me some privacy?” she asked gently, not wanting him to feel like she was rejecting him.
“You are okay?”
She knew he really was asking, “Are you alone?”
“I’m locked in the bathroom by myself. I’ll be done as quickly as I can.” Bethany felt his presence in her mind lessen a little, like a glass being emptied. But she could still feel him there, hovering in the recesses of her mind. The feeling was both reassuring and terrifying at the same time. She climbed into the shower, feeling something that she hadn’t felt in more than eleven years—hot water flowing over her skin. Well, maybe I won’t be done quite as quickly as I thought. She let out a long peaceful sigh as years and years of grime, that had practically become a part of her skin, flowed from her body—cleansing her both physically and mentally.
Twenty minutes later Jen was beating on the door for her to hurry. Bethany was still in the shower and she didn’t want it to end. The water poured over her head, restoring a small part of her lost humanity. But then something other than Jen’s pounding pulled her from the paradise, and she sharply cranked the knob and shut off the water. A desperate plea had sounded in her mind.
“Please.”
It was one word but it was filled with such longing, such need. She felt his emotions briefly before he closed them off from her again. Chaos. That is the only word that she could think of to describe what was going on inside of him. His wolf wanted blood because someone had taken her from his presence. The man just longed for her by his side.
She dried off and wrapped the towel around her before opening the door just a crack. Jen was standing there with one hand on her hip and the other holding a bundle of clothes.
“What part of be quick did you miss?”
Bethany frowned. “You didn’t say be quick.”
Jen huffed and pushed past her while at the same time grabbing Bethany’s arm to pull her back into the bathroom. She shut the door, turned the lock, and then handed Bethany the clothes.
The blonde turned to look at herself in the mirror and started running her fingers through her long hair.
Bethany realized after several moments that the other girl wasn’t going to be leaving any time soon. She started to protest, but already she realized that this one was used to getting her way. No doubt her protest would only be met with a smart remark, causing things to be more awkward than they already were.
So instead, Bethany laid the undergarments on the ground and then, slowly, deliberately, placed a foot in each leg hole. As carefully as she could, she bent down, holding her towel in place with one hand, and reached the other hand down to grab the panties, inching them up until they were firmly planted where they were supposed to be. Now, bolstered with the confidence of having her nether regions covered, but still holding the towel in front of her upper body, she grabbed a cute cotton skirt. It was black, long, and straight. Mimicking her actions with the underwear, but with, perhaps, a tiny bit less caution, she was able to pull the skirt up and fasten it around her waist. The fabric hugged what little curves she had. When she took a small step forward, leaning to grab the shirt, she felt the air hit her thigh. Bethany looked down and saw that there was a slit in the skirt from the bottom all the way up to…well, a nearly indecent spot at the top of her leg. It made her uncomfortable, but she didn’t want to offend Jen by complaining about the clothes she was loaning her, especially after the girl, who had no doubt noticed her subtle contortionist act to get into the skirt, had so far not made any embarrassing comments. So instead she discretely turned the skirt until the slit was closer to the back right side. She felt a little less vulnerable with her hip being the thing someone would see if the slit opened. Then, again one-handed, she slipped the long sleeved top over her head. Finally, she was able to let the towel drop to the floor. Once she was dressed Jen turned to look at her.
“Looks good. I went with a skirt because I thought it would be more comfortable even if it wasn’t a perfect fit. Pants can be utterly annoying and very uncomfortable if they don’t fit.” Jen grabbed a brush and signaled by spinning her finger that Bethany should turn around. Before she could stop herself, Bethany obeyed.
She wanted to slap herself for not speaking up. For so long she wasn’t allowed to question anything or anyone. It was going to take time for her to reprogram her brain.
Bethany met Jen’s eyes in the mirror. Jen was frowning at her. “You look like I just ripped the head from your favorite doll. Did you want to brush your own hair?”
She nodded hesitantly.
Jen stepped to the side and held out the brush to her. “If you want something, you have to speak up. You aren’t going to get in trouble. No one is going to spank you” —she paused and her eyes filled with glee. She waggled her eyebrows up and down— “unless you want him to.”
Bethany’s head tilted as her eyebrows drew together. “What?” She didn’t understand what the older girl had said. Why would she want someone to spank her?
Jen groaned and threw her head back. She raised her arms with her hands fisted and shook them. “Why! Why am I using good material on a chick so pure that she could be bottled without needing a filter?”
Now Bethany was even more confused. She began slowly brushing her hair as she watched the other female in the mirror. She was pacing and muttering under her breath. Once she laid the brush down, Jen stopped her pacing and looked at her.
“Food will be waiting for you back downstairs. You ready, Dasani?”
“Who’s Dasani?” Bethany asked.
Jen groaned again. “Bloody hell, it’s bottled water, and not nearly as funny since you have no clue about anything. But, that’s okay. We’ll get you educated soon enough and then you will be able to understand all my brilliant, hilarious comments. Let’s go.” She motioned for her to follow.
They didn’t run on their way back, but they walked at a brisk pace. Just as they reached the stairs that lead down to the room where Drake was currently in a cage waiting on her, Bethany stopped Jen. “How long are we going to have to stay down there?” She motioned down the stairs.
She saw the sadness in the other female’s blue eyes. “That’s up to you two, I’m afraid. We can’t let him out until Drake won’t kill the first male that breathes the air in the same room as you. And we can’t let you into the outside world because he would kill himself trying to get to you. So…” Jen shrugged, raising her eyebrows at the same time.
Bethany’s mouth opened slightly and her eyes widened. “Would he really do that?”
“You are the only person on earth that is safe with him,” Jen said. “The rest of us are prey. His wolf sees us as predators and, therefore, dangerous to his mate.
“What if he never calms down?” She didn’t know if she really wanted the answer, but her mouth acted before her brain caught up.
Jen’s eyes narrowed. “Let’s hope we don’t have to find out.”
Chapter 2
“At some point, the supernatural races will realize that they do not have to live in the shadows like cockroaches hiding from the light. That time is coming quickly. It is almost time for our brothers and sisters to step into the light of day and take their rightful places as shepherds among the sheep. It is almost time for us to rise up and put the world in its rightful order.” ~The Order
Lilly looked down at the sleeping infant in her arms and felt her heart clench in her chest. She remembered when Jacque was born and how she’d held that li
ttle baby just like she was now holding this one. Jacque’s birth had been in a difficult time in Lilly’s life. Now Jacque’s son was following in his mother’s footsteps, his birth marking a time of great trial. Lilly remembered how broken she had felt after Dillon left. And until Jacque was born, she thought she’d moved on. But as she held their daughter close to her heart, she’d realized that making a child with someone creates a bond not easily broken.
“Have you slept at all?” Alina asked from the doorway, peering into the room that they’d converted into a makeshift nursery. The Serbian pack mansion would apparently be home for the time being as they watched, waited, and worried about Fane and Jacque. Alina had taken it upon herself to get everything they would need to care for their grandchild. Lilly knew that they were both attempting to keep themselves sane as each of their children fought for their lives. Neither had even seen their child before they had slipped away, together, to hover somewhere between life and death.
“I’ve dozed,” Lilly admitted. “But I don’t like closing my eyes.”
Alina walked further into the room, her arms crossed in front of her chest. “I understand. You see them when you close your eyes.”
Lilly knew she was talking about Jacque and Fane. “I can’t think about it, Alina.” She breathed out. “Every time I think, even for a second, that they won’t come back from this, I can’t breathe. It’s like a two-ton brick has been dropped on my chest. I feel as though I’m going to suffocate and if I give thought to it, I don’t know how I could return from that kind of devastation.” Her jaw clenched as she confessed her emotions while attempting to hold herself together.
“They’re both fighters, Lilly. They’re both stubborn. They won’t give up the chance to raise their child.”
“What if they have no choice?” Lilly asked softly. “What if this is beyond Peri’s power, and Rachel’s skills, and our own wills? What if this is what is supposed to happen?”
Alina shook her head. She pulled her shoulders back as she dropped her hands to her side. Her head was erect; her chin jutted out defiantly. She looked every bit the Alpha female that she was—regal, in control, confident. “I will go before the Fates myself and offer Vasile and I in their place. I won’t stand by and watch my son and daughter-in-law pass from the life they were just beginning. This isn’t their end, Lilly. I need you to trust me on that.”
“Is such a thing even possible?”
“It is not unheard of. With the combined power of Peri and Vasile, we can get their attention. We can demand an audience. The Fates love to make deals. They would hear us out.”
Lilly nodded finally, reluctantly, with silent tears streaming down her face. “Do you want to hold him?”
Alina smiled. “I need to speak with Peri for a few minutes and then I will be back to take over. Is that alright?”
“Do what you need to. We aren’t going anywhere,” she said gently as she looked down at their grandson who was sleeping peacefully.
Lilly didn’t hear the Alpha female leave, but she felt the power of her presence recede and knew that she was gone. She wanted to feel more hopeful after hearing Alina’s declaration of faith, but Lilly was no fool. She knew that the Fates could refuse the request. If it came to Alina offering herself up, Lilly would be right beside her. There were many tough choices in life, but the choice to sacrifice her life for her child wasn’t one of them. If she had to, that would be one of the easiest choice she would ever have to make. She hoped she’d never find herself in the position to make it, but if it came down to it, she’d do it without hesitation.
Alina slipped quietly into the garden room where Peri stood between two of the most important people in her life. She walked slowly across the room, her eyes steady on the lifeless form of her son. She kept waiting for him to sit up suddenly demanding to see his new son. But he didn’t. He simply laid there with his eyes closed.
The high fae looked up at her and Alina paused in her steps. The normally pristine woman now appeared as though she had aged a couple of decades and hadn’t bothered to stop and brush her hair during any of that time. Dark circles underlined her eyes and her usually full lips were drawn into a tight line across her gaunt face. Her hands were on the foreheads of each of her charges and Alina could see a faint glow coming from her palms.
She continued forward, having gathered herself from the shock of Peri’s appearance. “Where is Rachel?”
“She needed to sleep. She’s useless to me if she can’t stay on her feet,” Peri answered. Her voice was scratchy, as though she’d lost it screaming.
The Alpha nodded. She slipped her shoes off and stepped into the shallow water that had been infused with the powerful healer’s healing magic and felt it tingle against her bare feet. She walked up to Jacque first and leaned down pressing a kiss to her cheek. The girl’s skin was cold and Alina felt as if an icy hand was gripping her insides, spreading a chill throughout her body.
The Alpha stood, shaking, and walked over to her son. Alina closed her eyes, holding her head up and swallowing painfully. She didn’t want to look down. She didn’t want to see the child she’d brought into this world, the boy she’d raised for nineteen years—her only son—reduced to a corpse. Her breath sped up and she had to take several deep breaths to gather her composure. Finally, she opened her eyes and looked down.
His eyes were closed as though sleeping. But, instead of appearing peaceful, his face was contorted, frozen in some state of unknown pain. She reached out a shaking hand and cupped his chin. Like his mate’s, Fane’s skin was ice cold. Feeling this was the Alpha’s breaking point. She fell to her knees, heedless of the water soaking her clothes. Alina gripped his shirt in both her hands, balling the fabric tightly. She wasn’t sure if she was trying to hold him to this realm or if she was trying to hold herself together. Her eyes scanned over his face, remembering the first time she’d ever held him as a baby. She’d run her fingertips over every inch of his tiny face. She’d been in awe of something so perfect, so special, being given to her to care for. Her hands had shaken then too, so many years ago. Her heart had sped up as he opened his bright blue eyes and stared up at her in wonder. For that moment in time, she was his whole world. There was no one else in the world that was as important to her as him, nor anyone as important to him as her. He’d listened to her voice for nine months. He’d smelled nothing but her scent for nine months. She was his safe place and it was all there in his little eyes as he looked to her to protect him, feed him, and love him. And she had, as long as she’d been able, until he’d grown into a man and left her protection.
She could hold him in her arms just as she did the day he was born, but she was no longer his world. Now there were others he loved, and there were dangers beyond her control. Now he was the protector, the provider, and the parent.
Those facts did not make it acceptable to see her son lying lifeless beside his true mate. She was his mother. She was the one who was to die first. Parents should never have to bury their child and she knew it would destroy Vasile if that was what it came to.
She pulled herself closer to him until she was right in front of his face and bore her gaze into him. Her words came out in her native tongue, as if they would have more effect than being spoken in their second language. “We have taught you to fight since you were a boy. We have instilled in you the need to persevere even when the situation seems impossible. We have given you all the tools you needed to be the man you are. You cannot stop now. I won’t allow it! Fane Lupei, you will return to this life. Wherever your soul has drifted, you had better pull it back into your body and open your eyes to the world where you are needed. Your mate needs you, your son, oh god, Fane your son—” Her voice broke as she swallowed down the tears. “He’s beautiful, blue eyes like yours and auburn hair like Jacque’s—perfect in every way. And he needs you—you, Fane—not me, not Lilly, not Vasile. We are just petty substitutes. He needs his parents. You need to fight! I will not say goodbye to my only son. So fight, da
mmit!” She slammed a fist onto his chest as she finally let go of the tears.
She heard another sob that wasn’t her own and her eyes were drawn up to the fae she’d forgotten was there. Tears streamed down Peri’s face as she stared back at Alina. “I’m trying,” she choked out. Her lips trembled as she sank down on one knee. Her hands remained on Jacque and Fane’s foreheads, but her head fell forward and her shoulders shook with sorrow.
“I know you are,” Alina told her as she pushed her fear, pain, and anger back down. She called on her wolf to give her strength and clarity of mind so that she wouldn’t be led by her emotions, especially since her emotions were a raging typhoon right now. She needed to be strong. “You are doing something that I never could. Thank you. Truly, Perizada, thank you.” She stood, caressing her son’s face one last time before she stepped away. Alina walked over to Peri and pulled the fae back to her feet. “The high fae only bow to one, and I am not her. It is I who should be bowing to you. I know what you’re doing and I’m selfish enough to ask you to hold on a little longer.”
Peri’s eyes widened. “As if I’d stop, even if you ordered me to. No one dies on my watch—not if I can do something about it.”
“How long can you do this?” Alina motioned to her hands.
“I have a lot of immortality to give,” she said with a familiar smirk that helped Alina gain even more control.
“Wadim is doing research—”
“That’s surprising,” Peri interrupted, sniffing back her own tears. “He is the pack historian and record keeper, after all.”
Alina’s lips lifted slightly. If Peri could still be contrary, then there was hope, at least that’s what Alina was going to choose to believe.