XXIX
It was Tiny who discovered that it was leap year, and invited Menlo todance at her house one Saturday night and take all advantage of itsprivileges. Mrs. Yorba consented that Magdalena should have a new frock,the organdie being in a condition for a maid to sniff at. Magdalenaasserted herself, and ordered a scarlet tarlatan. The frock was smartlymade at a good house, and Magdalena, on the night of the party, wasalmost pleased with herself. The vivid colour slanted under her swarthyskin. She wore red slippers and red roses in her hair. By this time sheknew something of dress,--it was October,--and she had also discoveredthat red was Trennahan's favourite colour.
She was happy, but a little nervous. There had been more than one signof late that the pretty comedy of friendship had run its course. Thevery words they uttered had lost their clear-cut black and white, seemedto grow more full-blooded. His eyes had made her lose her breath morethan once, had even sharpened her wits to hasty subterfuge.
The Montgomery parlour was a narrow room at right angles with thedining-room. The two rooms had been thrown into one and canvased.
Tiny invited Don Roberto to open the dance with her, and thatplatonically enamoured gentleman consented with a grand flourish. Ilaexercised her blandishments upon Mr. Polk, but to no purpose. No onecould understand his constant attendance at these dances, for he merelystood about with unrelaxing visage, scarcely exchanging a word with eventhe older men. He wore the suit of evening clothes which had done dutyat men's dinners these fifteen years, and had bought a pair of eveningshoes and a white necktie. Eugene Fort remarked that he looked like aman whose vital organs had turned to gold and were giving him trouble.Mr. Washington replied that the tight skin which had done such goodservice was certainly beginning to bag, and that if he didn't knock offand take a vacation in Europe he'd find himself breaking.
"To my knowledge," he added, "he hasn't taken a vacation in thirtyyears; hasn't even been to Yosemite or the Big Trees. He has always saidthat work was his tonic; but the truth was that he feared to come homeand find a dollar unaccounted for,--neither more nor less. And therecomes a time, my dear young man, there comes a time--"
"It comes early in this State."
"It does," Mr. Washington replied, with a sigh and a glance at his youngwife. "But the fevers have raged themselves out here, or I am muchmistaken. We're in for quiet times. The next generation will livelonger, perhaps."
"How old is Polk?"
"Nearly sixty. He's worn better than many, because he's let whiskeyalone; never took a drop more than was good for him when Con. Virginiawas tumbling from seven hundred to nothing. Neither did Yorba, who isseveral years older; but he's got the longevity of his race. JackBelmont is under fifty, and looks older than either,--when you get himin a good light. California is all right, and whiskey is all right, butthe two together play the devil and no mistake."
"It is the last place where I should want whiskey," said Trennahan, whohad joined them.
"You weren't here half a dozen years ago. While the Virginia City mineswere booming, your backbone felt like a streak of lightning; you hadn'ta comma in your very thoughts; you woke up every morning in a coldsweat, and your teeth chattered as you opened your newspaper. Youbelieved every man a liar and dreamt that your veins ran liquid gold.The Stock Exchange was Hell let loose. Men went insane. Men committedsuicide. No one stopped to remark. Do you wonder that men watered theroots of their nerves with alcohol? I did not, but the fever of thattime burnt me out, all the same. I've never been the same man since. Norhas any other San Franciscan. Even Polk and Yorba, although they soldout at the right moment in nine cases out of ten, felt the strain. Asfor Jack Belmont, he was on one glorious drunk all the time,--and nevermore of a gentleman. How he pulled through and doubled his pile to boot,the Lord only knows; but he did."
"Miss Belmont will be a great prize," observed Fort, thoughtfully. "Thegreatest beauty in the State, if she has fulfilled her promise; anyamount of go, and one or two cold millions,--the Californian heiresssublimated."
"And mistress of herself and her millions in a few years. I hear thatBelmont has not drunk a drop since he has been in Europe with her; he'sbeen gone a year now. That is fatal at his age,--after having been inpickle some thirty years. Poor Jack,--the best fellow that ever lived! Isuppose his love for the girl brought him up with a round turn.Doubtless he suddenly realised that she was old enough to understand,and that he must pull himself up if he would keep her respect. There's agood deal of tragedy in California, Mr. Trennahan, and it's not of thesentimental young folks' sort, neither."
"I won't admit it," said Trennahan, who was looking at Magdalena. "Itsvery air breathes content--now, at any rate. I am glad I did not comeearlier."
"California is the Princess Royal of her country," said Fort; "and ather birth all the good fairies came and gave her of every gift in thestores of the immortals. Then a wicked fairy came and turned theskeleton in her beautiful body to gold; and, lo! the princess who hadbeen fashioned to bless mankind carried, hidden from sight by herinnocent and beneficent charms, a terrible curse. Men came to kiss, andstayed to tear away her flesh with their teeth. When her skeleton hasbeen torn forth, even to the uttermost rib, then the spell of the wickedfairy will be broken, and California be the most gracious mother mankindhas ever known."
"Eugene, you like to hear yourself talk, but it must be admitted thatyou talk well. Will you come out and have a cigar? and you, Mr.Trennahan?"
There was no doubt that the party was a success. Between dances thegirls stood together in groups and superciliously regarded the ranks ofhumble wall-flowers. Suddenly a half-dozen would dash down upon a youngman, beg him simultaneously for an eighth of a waltz, and scribblehieroglyphics on their fans. Alan Rush was the belle, and no girl wasallowed to have more than a fourth of him at a time. Once the girls leftthe room in a body, returning, with mumbled excuses, after the music forthe next dance had been playing some three minutes. Sometimes a girlwould approach a segregated youth, ask him patronisingly if he wasenjoying himself, talk to him until the music began, then sidle off withan inaudible remark. Altogether if the young men had sinned during thesummer,--and they searched their consciences in vain,--they werepunished. The New Woman had not arrived in the Eighties, but theinstinct was there, inherited from remotest mother.
The party was a third over when Trennahan approached Magdalena for thefirst time. She had taken her partner to his chaperon, Mrs. Geary, andwas regarding a group of expectant youths. The spirit of the thing hadpossessed her and she was enjoying herself. Her shyness had worn off tosome extent; she danced rather well, and had learned to make small talk.Being happy, all things seemed easy of accomplishment. She became awarethat Trennahan was standing beside her, but did not turn her eyes.
"Will you sit out a dance with me--or rather walk it out in the garden?You must be a little tired, and it is delightful out there."
"I'd rather--I think papa would not like it."
"I am positive that he would not mind."
"I am engaged."
"Let me see your fan."
She delivered it reluctantly.
"You have no one down for the next--nor the next."
"I--I--think I'd rather not go."
"Do you mean that? For if you do, I shall go home. I came for nothingelse. I have not seen you alone for three days."
"I am sorry."
"Come."
Her jumping fingers closed about her fan, and the sticks creaked; butshe followed him.
As they descended the steps he drew her hand through his arm. The gardenlooked very wild and dark. The stars were burning overhead. Slantinginto the heavy perfume of flowers were the pungent odours of a forestfire.
"You look like a pomegranate flower."
"Do you like my frock?"
"You know that I do."
"Should you like to smoke?"
"I should not."
"It is a beautiful night."
"Very."
"I had a letter from Helena to-day."
"Did you?"
"She described a wonderful experience she had climbing the Alps. Shall Itell you about it?"
"Good God, no! I beg pardon, but the American girl in Europe isinteresting to no one but herself."
"She is interesting to me."
"Because you love her. Her letters really bore you, only you won't admitit even to yourself."
"But Helena is really more brilliant than most people."
"Possibly; but I did not come out here to talk about Helena."
Magdalena's fan was hanging at the end of a chain. She clutched at it,missed it, and pressed her hand against her heart, which was hammering.
He saw the motion, and took her hand in his. She glanced about wildly.She was in a whirl of terror of everything under heaven. Too dignifiedto wrest herself away and run, she gave him a swift glance of appeal,then bent her head. He dropped her hand.
"I would not frighten nor bother you for the world, but you know what Ihave wanted to say for days past. That, at least, can be no shock: youhave known for a long while."
"I'd rather you didn't say it," she gasped.
"I intend to say it, nevertheless, and you will soon get used to it.Will you marry me?"
"Oh--I--suppose so--that is, if you want me to. Let us go back to thehouse."
"I have no intention of going back to the house for fully half an hour.Do you love me?"
She hated him at the moment.
"Answer me."
"I--I--thought I did--I don't know."
"Well, we will drop the subject for a moment. There are some otherthings I want to talk to you about. Shall we walk on?"
She drew a long breath at the respite. He resumed in a moment.
"Of course I am double your age, but I do not think we shall be any lesshappy on that account. My life, I am going to tell you, has not been anideal one. After the wildness of youth came the deliberatetransgressions of maturity, then the more flagrant, because purposelesssins which followed satiety. I know nothing of the middle classes of theUnited States,--I have lived little in this country,--but the young menof the upper class are not educated to add to the glory of the Americanrace: they are educated to spend their fathers' millions. It is truethat in spite of a rather wild career at college I left it with ahalf-defined idea of being a scientific explorer, and had taken aspecial course to that end. But my ambitions crumbled somewhere betweenthe campus and New York. I am not seeking to exculpate myself, to throwthe responsibility on my adolescent country: I had something more thanthe average intelligence, and I pursued my subsequent life deliberately.Not pursuing an ideal, I had no care to reserve the best that was in mefor the woman who should one day be my wife. I entered diplomacy becauseI liked the life, and because I believed that the day would come whenwomen would mean little more than paper dolls to me, and power wouldmean everything. I did not reckon on wearying to desperation of theworld in general. That time came; with it a desire to live an outdoorexistence for the rest of my life. That at least never palled. Idetermined to come to California. It was an impulse; I hardly speculatedupon whether I should remain or not. As the train slid down the Sierras,I knew that I should. Memories jumbled, and I made no effort to pullthem apart. For the first time in my life I wanted a home and a wife.The night we met I felt more attracted to you than to the other charmingCalifornians I had met because you seemed more a part of the country. Itis singular that a man should love the country first, and the woman as alogical result, but I did. I think that you know I love you; but not howmuch, nor what it means to me. I am not good enough for you. My soul isold. I see life exactly as it is. I have not an illusion. I am asprosaic as are all men who have made a business of the pleasures oflife. I could not make you a perfervid or romantic speech to save mylife, and as the selfishness of a lifetime has made me moody and fitful,there will be intervals when I shall be the reverse of lover-like; buton the whole I think you will find me a rather ardent lover. It seemsvery little to offer a girl who has everything to give. But I love you;never doubt that. What little good was left in me you have coaxed up andtrained to something like its original proportions. I want you tounderstand what my past has been; but I also want you to understand thatI am not the same man I was six months ago, and that you have worked thechange. When I crossed the continent, it is no exaggeration to say thatI had Hell in me,--that ferment of spirit which means mental nausea andthe desperate dodging of one's accusing soul. I suppose such a timecomes to most men who have persistently violated the original instinctfor good. With the lower orders it means crime; with the highercivilisation a legion of imps shrieking in a man's soul. I will not saythat my particular band have been silent since I came here, for thatwould mean moral obtuseness; but they are placated, and have consentedto fix a generous eye on the future. I believe, firmly believe, that myfuture will atone for my past,--morally, I mean; I want you tounderstand that I have wronged no man but myself, that I have beenguilty of no act unbecoming a gentleman. Now look at me and tell me thatyou do not hate me."
Magdalena lifted her face. Her lips were dry and parted, her eyesexpanded, but not with horror.
"I love you," she said; "I am glad that I can help you."
They were near a huge oak whose limbs shut out the stars. Trennahan drewher into its shadows and took her in his arms and kissed her many times.He lifted her arms about him, and she clasped her hands tightly. Hemight be business-like, without illusions, but he knew how to make lovewith energy and grace. Magdalena from brain to sole was on fire withadoration of him. The words of it surged toward speech, but reserve heldher even then. She only clung to him and breathed the passion which histouch had startled. His own pulses were full, and he held her close,glad that the spiritual desires had caught and embraced the human, andthat their chances for happiness were all that he could wish and a gooddeal more than he deserved.