“I thought you might be here,” he said, as he pulled up to where I was standing. “Get in. We need to leave.”
“What’s going on?” I asked, sliding into the passenger seat.
He drove on toward the main road. “One of my priests told me of a conversation he overheard in the village. Some government officials are in town and they were asking questions about me and the mission.”
“What do you think they want?”
He looked at me reassuringly. “I don’t know. Let’s just say. I’m not as certain as before that they will leave us alone. I thought, as a precaution, that we should drive up into the mountains. One of my priests lives near Machu Picchu. His name is Father Carl. We’ll be safe at his house until we can better read the situation.” He smiled. “I want you to see Machu Picchu anyway.”
I suddenly had a flash of suspicion that he had made a deal and was taking me somewhere to turn me in. I decided to proceed cautiously and to stay alert until I found out for sure.
“Did you finish the translation?” he asked.
“Most of it,” I said.
“You had asked about human evolution. Did you finish that part?”
“No.”
He turned his eyes from the road and looked at me intensely. I pretended not to notice.
“Is something wrong?” he asked.
“Nothing.” I said. “How long will it take to get to Machu Picchu?”
“About four hours.”
I wanted to remain silent and let Sanchez talk, hoping he might give himself away, but I couldn’t control my curiosity about evolution.
“So how do humans further evolution?” I asked.
He glanced at me. “What do you think?”
“I don’t know,” I said. “But when I was up on the ridge I thought it might have something to do with the meaningful coincidences that the First Insight talks about.”
“That’s right,” he said. “That would fit with the other insights, wouldn’t it?”
I was confused. I almost understood but I couldn’t quite grasp it. I remained silent.
“Think of how the Insights fall into sequence,” he said. “The First Insight occurs when we take the coincidences seriously. These coincidences make us feel there is something more, something spiritual, operating underneath everything we do.
“The Second Insight institutes our awareness as something real. We can see that we have been preoccupied with material survival, with focusing on controlling our situation in the universe for security, and we know our openness now represents a kind of waking up to what is really going on.
“The Third Insight begins a new view of life. It defines the physical universe as one of pure energy, an energy that somehow responds to how we think.
“And the Fourth exposes the human tendency to steal energy from other humans by controlling them, taking over their minds, a crime in which we engage because we so often feel depleted of energy, and cut off. This shortage of energy can be remedied, of course, when we connect with the higher source. The universe can provide all we need if we can only open up to it. That is the revelation of the Fifth Insight.
“In your case,” he continued, “you had a mystical experience that allowed you to briefly see the magnitude of energy one can acquire. But this state is like leaping ahead of everyone else and glimpsing the future. We can’t maintain it for very long. Once we try to talk to someone who is operating in normal consciousness, or try to live in a world where conflict is still happening, we get knocked out of this advanced state and fall back to the level of our old selves.
“And then,” he continued, “it is a matter of slowly regaining what we glimpsed, a little at a time, and to begin a progression back toward that ultimate consciousness. But to do this, we must learn to consciously fill up with energy because this energy brings on the coincidences, and the coincidences help us actualize the new level on a permanent basis.”
I must have looked puzzled because he said, “Think about it: when something occurs beyond chance to lead us forward in our lives, then we become more actualized people. We feel as though we are attaining what destiny is leading us to become. When this occurs, the level of energy that brought on the coincidences in the first place is instituted in us. We can be knocked out of it and lose energy when we are afraid, but this level serves as a new outer limit which can be regained quite easily. We have become a new person. We exist at a level of higher energy, at a level—get this—of higher vibration.
“Can you see the process now? We fill up, grow, fill up and grow again. That is how we as humans continue the evolution of the universe to a higher and higher vibration.”
He paused for a moment then seemed to think of something he wanted to add. “This evolution has been going on unconsciously throughout human history. That explains why civilization has progressed and why humans have grown larger, lived longer, and so forth. Now however, we are making the whole process conscious. That is what the Manuscript is telling us. That is what this movement toward worldwide spiritual consciousness is all about.”
I was listening intensely, totally fascinated with what Sanchez was telling me. “So all we have to do is fill up with energy, as I learned to do with John, and the coincidences begin to happen more consistently?”
“Well yes, but that’s not as easy as you think. Before we can connect with the energy on a permanent basis there is one more hurdle we must pass. The next insight, the Sixth, deals with this issue.”
“What is it?”
He looked squarely at me. “We must face up to our particular way of controlling others. Remember, the Fourth Insight reveals that humans have always felt short of energy and have sought to control each other to acquire the energy that flows between people. The Fifth then shows us that an alternative source exists, but we can’t really stay connected with this source until we come to grips with the particular method that, we, as individuals, use in our controlling, and stop doing it—because whenever we fall back into this habit, we get disconnected from the source.
“Getting rid of this habit isn’t easy because it’s always unconscious at first. The key to letting it go is to bring it fully into consciousness, and we do that by seeing that our particular style of controlling others is one we learned in childhood to get attention, to get the energy moving our way, and we’re stuck there. This style is something we repeat over and over again. I call it our unconscious control drama.
“I call it a drama because it is one familiar scene, like a scene in a movie, for which we write the script as youths. Then we repeat this scene over and over in our daily lives without being aware of it. All we know is that the same kind of events happen to us repeatedly. The problem is if we are repeating one particular scene over and over, then the other scenes of our real life movie, the high adventure marked by coincidences, can’t go forward. We stop the movie when we repeat this one drama in order to manipulate for energy.”
Sanchez slowed the truck and moved carefully forward through a series of deep ruts in the road. I realized I was frustrated. I couldn’t quite grasp how a control drama worked. I almost expressed my feelings to Sanchez but I couldn’t. I realized I still felt distant from him and I didn’t care to reveal myself.
“Did you understand?” he asked.
“I don’t know,” I said curtly. “I don’t know if I have a control drama.”
He looked at me with the warmest regard and chuckled out loud. “Is that so?” he asked. “Then why do you always act so aloof?”
CLEARING
THE PAST
Ahead the road narrowed and bent sharply around the sheer rock face of the mountain. The truck bounced over several large rocks and slowly proceeded through the curve. Below, the Andes rose in massive gray ridges above banks of snow-white clouds.
I looked at Sanchez. He was leaning over the steering wheel, tense. For most of the day we had been scaling steep inclines and edging through passages made more narrow by fallen rock. I had wanted to broach the
subject of control dramas again but the time seemed inappropriate. Sanchez appeared to need every ounce of energy for driving, and besides, I wasn’t clear on what I wanted to ask. I had read the rest of the Fifth Insight and it had echoed exactly the points Sanchez had related to me. The idea of getting rid of my style of controlling seemed desirable, especially if it would make my evolution accelerate, but I still couldn’t grasp how a control drama operated.
“What are you thinking about?” Sanchez asked.
“I finished reading the Fifth Insight,” I said. “And I was thinking about these dramas. Considering what you said about me, I assume you think my drama has something to do with being aloof?”
He didn’t reply. He was staring up the road. A hundred feet ahead, a large four-wheel drive vehicle blocked the way. A man and a woman stood on a rock precipice fifty feet from the vehicle. They returned our gaze.
Sanchez stopped the truck and looked them over for an instant, then smiled. “I know the woman,” he said. “That’s Julia. It’s all right. Let’s talk with them.”
Both the man and woman were of dark complexion and appeared Peruvian. The woman was older, appearing to be about fifty, while the man looked approximately thirty. As we got out of the truck, the woman walked toward us.
“Father Sanchez!” she said as she approached.
“How are you Julia?” Sanchez replied. The two embraced, then Sanchez introduced me to Julia. Julia, in turn, introduced her companion, Rolando.
Saying nothing else, Julia and Sanchez turned their backs on us and walked toward the overhang where Julia and Rolando had previously been standing. Rolando looked at me intensely and I instinctively turned and walked in the direction of the other two people. Rolando followed, still looking at me as though he wanted something. Although his hair and features were young, his complexion was ruddy and red. For some reason I felt anxious.
Several times as we walked to the edge of the mountain, he looked as though he was going to speak, but each time I turned my eyes away and increased my pace. He remained silent. When we reached the precipice, I sat on a ledge to prevent him from sitting next to me. Julia and Sanchez were above me about twenty-five feet, sitting together on a large boulder.
Rolando sat as close to me as possible. Although his constant stare bothered me, I was slightly curious about him at the same time.
He caught me looking at him and asked, “Are you here for the Manuscript?”
I took a long time to answer. “I’ve heard of it.”
He looked perplexed. “Have you seen it?”
“Some,” I said. “Do you have something to do with it?”
“I am interested,” he said, “but I have not seen any copies yet.” A period of silence followed.
“Are you from the United States?” he asked.
The question disturbed me, so I decided not to answer.
Instead I asked, “Does the Manuscript have anything to do with the ruins at Machu Picchu?”
“I don’t think so,” he replied. “Except that it was written about the same time they were built.”
I remained silent, looking out at the incredible view of the Andes. Sooner or later, if I remained quiet, he would divulge what he and Julia were doing here and how it concerned the Manuscript. We sat for twenty minutes with no conversation. Finally, Rolando stood and walked up to where the others were talking.
I was perplexed as to what to do. I had avoided sitting with Sanchez and Julia because I had the distinct impression they wanted to talk alone. For perhaps another thirty minutes, I remained there, gazing out at the rocky peaks and straining to overhear the conversation above me. None of them paid me the slightest bit of attention. Finally I decided to join them, but before I could move, the three of them stood and began walking toward Julia’s vehicle. I cut across the rocks toward them.
“They have to go,” Sanchez remarked as I approached.
“I’m sorry we did not have time to talk,” Julia said. “I hope we see you again.” She was looking at me with the same warmth Sanchez often displayed. As I nodded, she cocked her head slightly and added, “In fact, I have a feeling we will see you soon.”
As we strolled down the rocky path, I felt the need to say something in response but I couldn’t think. When we reached her vehicle Julia only nodded slightly and said a quick good-bye. Both she and Rolando got in and Julia drove away toward the north, the way Sanchez and I had come. I felt puzzled by the entire experience.
Once we were in our vehicle, Sanchez asked, “Did Rolando fill you in on Wil?”
“No!” I said. “Had they seen him?”
Sanchez looked confused, “Yes, they saw him at a village forty miles east of here.”
“Did Wil say anything about me?”
“Julia said Wil mentioned being separated from you. She said Wil talked mainly with Rolando. Didn’t you tell Rolando who you were?”
“No, I didn’t know if I could trust him.”
Sanchez looked at me in total bewilderment. “I told you it was fine to talk with them. I have known Julia for years. She owns a business in Lima, but since the discovery of the Manuscript she has been looking for the Ninth Insight. Julia would not be traveling with anyone untrustworthy. There was no danger. Now you missed what could have been important information.”
Sanchez looked at me with a serious expression. “This is a perfect example of how a control drama interferes,” he said. “You were so aloof you didn’t allow an important coincidence to take place.”
I must have appeared defensive. “It’s all right,” he said, “everyone plays a drama of one kind or another. At least now you understand how yours works.”
“I don’t understand!” I said. “What exactly am I doing?”
“Your way of controlling people and situations,” he explained, “in order to get energy coming your way, is to create this drama in your mind during which you withdraw and look mysterious and secretive. You tell yourself that you’re being cautious but what you’re really doing is hoping someone will be pulled into this drama and will try to figure out what’s going on with you. When someone does, you remain vague, forcing them to struggle and dig and try to discern your true feelings.
“As they do so, they give you their full attention and that sends their energy to you. The longer you can keep them interested and mystified, the more energy you receive. Unfortunately, when you play aloof, your life tends to evolve very slowly because you’re repeating this same scene over and over again. If you had opened up to Rolando, your life movie would have taken off in a new and meaningful direction.”
I felt myself becoming depressed. All this was just another example of what Wil had pointed out when he saw me resisting giving information to Reneau. It was true. I did tend to hide what I really thought. I looked out the window as we followed the road higher into the peaks. Sanchez concentrated again on avoiding the fatal drop-offs. When the road straightened, he looked over at me and said, “The first step in the process of getting clear, for each of us, is to bring our particular control drama into full consciousness. Nothing can proceed until we really look at ourselves and discover what we are doing to manipulate for energy. This is what has just happened to you.”
“What is the next step?” I asked.
“Each of us must go back into our past, back into our early family life, and see how this habit was formed. Seeing its inception keeps our way of controlling in consciousness. Remember, most of our family members were operating in a drama themselves, trying to pull energy out of us as children. This is why we had to form a control drama in the first place. We had to have a strategy to win energy back. It is always in relation to our family members that we develop our particular dramas. However, once we recognize the energy dynamics in our families, we can go past these control strategies and see what was really happening.”
“What do you mean, really happening?”
“Each person must reinterpret his family experience from an evolutionary point of view, from a
spiritual point of view, and discover who he really is. Once we do that, our control drama falls away and our real lives take off.”
“So how do I begin?”
“By first understanding how your drama was formed. Tell me about your father.”
“He is a good man who is fun-loving and capable but…” I hesitated, not wanting to sound ungrateful toward my father.
“But what?” Sanchez asked.
“Well,” I said, “he was always critical. I could never do anything right.”
“How did he criticize you?” Sanchez asked.
A picture of my father, young and strong, appeared in my mind. “He asked questions, then found something wrong with the answers.”
“And what happened to your energy?”
“I guess I felt drained so I tried to keep from telling him anything.”
“You mean you got vague and distant, trying to say things in a way that would get his attention but not reveal enough to give him something to criticize. He was the interrogator and you dodged around him with your aloofness?”
“Yeah, I guess. But what is an interrogator?”
“An interrogator is another kind of drama. People who use this means of gaining energy, set up a drama of asking questions and probing into another person’s world with the specific purpose of finding something wrong. Once they do, then they criticize this aspect of the other’s life. If this strategy succeeds then the person being criticized is pulled into the drama. They suddenly find themselves becoming self-conscious around the interrogator and paying attention to what the interrogator is doing and thinking about, so as not to do something wrong that the interrogator would notice. This psychic deference gives the interrogator the energy he desires.
“Think about the times you have been around someone like this. When you get caught up in this drama, don’t you tend to act a certain way so that the person won’t criticize you? He pulls you off your own path and drains your energy because you judge yourself by what he might be thinking.”