“Jane, Jane wake up.”
Slowly, I blinked my eyes open, my brain trying to make sense of the world around me. But everything was confusing and blurry. An odd gray haze permeated the living quarters, telling me that it wasn’t morning yet, but it wasn’t night either. Although my blanket was thick, there was a bite to the air. Confused, I scanned the dorm room, taking in the many sleeping forms huddled on their cots. It could have been any normal morning...but something felt off. Not quite real.
“Jane,” someone whispered once more. A feminine voice. A familiar voice.
I rolled onto my right side, facing the culprit. I couldn’t see her features in the dark, but I knew her tone. “Momma?”
“Shhh, you know you’re not supposed to call me that. At least not here.” She held out her hand. “Come on.”
Trustingly I wrapped my small fingers around hers. She tugged me from the bed, my stocking feet hitting the hard, wooden planks. I was in the children’s dorm. A place I’d been a million times before, yet I couldn’t deny the sensation that it felt wrong, as if I wasn’t supposed to be here.
“Where we going?” I whispered.
“Quiet.”
She led me toward the door. Even though I didn’t want to go out into the cold, I couldn’t help but feel a thrill of excitement. We weren’t allowed outside at night. As she pushed the door wide, I glanced back, fearful someone would hear us. But no one stirred. Everyone slept with no idea that we were breaking the rules.
Suddenly, we were racing from the dorm and into the early morning dawn. Her long, dark hair floated back like a veil tickling my face, but I didn’t dare complain for fear she’d change her mind and take me back. She’d never much paid attention to me before, why now? But I kept my mouth shut because I wanted to know what was out here at night, what happened while we slept. The ground hadn’t completely defrosted and it chilled my feet through my thick socks, but I spent so little time with her that I craved her attention. Not that I would tell her. No, we’d been taught since birth to not speak of our affection.
We didn’t pause until we neared a patch of wild shrubbery by the fence. Being that close to the metal bars made me nervous and excited all at once.
“Here.” She shoved me under a patch of vines, heedless to the fact that the thorns were scraping my skin. I fell to my knees and cringed. Most of the time she ignored me, but once in a great, great while, like now, she seemed almost desperate to see me. “I found this.”
I curled my legs under me, the cool mist of night coating my exposed skin. She shoved a book into my hands. I stared at it, confused. “A book, Momma?”
She sat beside me, grinning. When she smiled like that I swore she was the most beautiful person in the compound. “Not just any book…something I’ve never read before. Something I didn’t even know could exist. You know the stories that Albert tells in the evening around the fire?”
I nodded, staring at the book, marveling over the smooth leather. Unable to stop myself, I brought it close and breathed deeply the musty scent. It smelled like everything I loved: the thrill of the unknown, knowledge and excitement.
“This book,” she tapped the cover, “is like one of Albert’s stories. You’ll hide it for me, won’t you?”
The moon was almost full and shone upon the cover, making the golden lettering glow. Magic. If I got caught with the book, punishment would be swift and severe. “The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe?”
Suddenly she gripped my shoulders, startling me. “Don’t ever give up hope, Jane. You hear me?” She shook me, a quick jerk that snapped my head back. “Don’t ever, ever give up hope that there is more, that there is something better. It’s there.” She released me and looked up at the sky, just barely visible through the vines. “Can you hear it calling? You just have to believe.”
I parted my lips to question her odd comments, but she stood, dove from the vines and raced back toward the adult ward, leaving me there…alone with the novel.
I clutched the book to my chest. “Mamma?” I whispered, suddenly afraid. The world seemed too big, too dark and too mysterious. Dropping the book, I bolted from the vines and raced toward the children’s ward.
“Jane,” a deep voice called out to me.
I didn’t dare look back, but forced my legs to run faster. But no matter how hard I tried, the dorm didn’t get any closer.
“Jane!”
Not my mother this time. A man. Reality slapped me in the face in the form of a large, cold wave of salty water. My lashes lifted, the hazy clouds above. Suddenly, I was gasping for air. I tightened my arms around Thane. I hadn’t been with my mom, it had only been a memory…a long, lost memory from childhood. Water surged up over my head again, stinging my eyes and filling my mouth and nose. Just when I’d suck in the pure air, another wave of water would crash around me. I coughed up the bitter taste of salt, desperate to breathe clean, fresh air. My lungs burned, my chest hurt and my lips and mouth were raw from the salt.
“You still with me?” Thane asked, panting as he sliced through the water.
“How…how much further?” Coughing, I rested the side of my face against Thane’s back, my weak arms clinging to his shoulders as he surged through the waves. In that moment Thane was no monster. He wasn’t a vampire or even a dhampir; he was merely the man I had to rely on, a man who was doing everything in his power to save me.
“Almost there,” he said. “Keep breathing for me, okay?”
I was too weak to respond, and instead closed my eyes. The feel of his muscles, taunt and strong under my body as he moved through the water reassured me, but that tiny strip of land seemed so very far away. Afraid and exhausted, I squeezed my eyes shut. I’d never felt water so cold. My entire body had grown numb.
I wasn’t sure how much time went by but suddenly I noticed a difference in Thane’s movements. He wasn’t floating, but almost seemed to be walking.
Even when Thane peeled my arms away from his neck, leaving me floating alone, I still didn’t open my eyes. My feet hit land that shifted, gritty dirt seeping through my socks. Somehow, at some point, I’d lost consciousness and my shoes. My legs buckled and I fell back into the water.
Before I hit the surface, Thane grabbed both of my hands and vaguely I was aware of him dragging me onto land. I never would have made it without him. He released his hold and left me laying there, staring up at the blue sky, gasping for fresh air. The water that had been sucked into my lungs surged upward. I rolled to my side and vomited up salt water.
“You’ll be fine,” Thane said, his booted feet noticeable from the corner of my eye.
I somehow managed to shove my hands into the rocky shore and sit up. Where the hell were we? A land of trees, rocks and dirt. Utterly depleted, I sank to the ground, laying on my side and facing the ocean. The mainland was a hazy strip of land in the distance, so far away that I’d never be able to see Will or Kelly. Were they dead? Captured? Or had they managed to escape?
“Come on,” Thane was on his feet, soaking wet, but not shivering like me. And although he’d swum a great distance while pulling me, he seemed only slightly out of breath. “We need to go now, before you get sick.”
He gripped my hand and pulled me to my feet. For a brief moment I leaned into him, his breath warm across my cheek as the water dripped from his hair onto the tip of my nose. I swore even my bones were frozen. There had been a few times when a wave had crashed over us that I was positive we’d drown. But as always, Thane had done what he’d set out to do and we’d somehow survived. At some point our luck would run out…wouldn’t it?
“We need to find shelter.” He released his hold and started along the shore, leaving me dripping and shivering near the water’s edge.
Once again, I found myself turning to look at the ocean and toward the mainland. “Please, Will,” I whispered. “Please still be alive.”
“Jane,” Thane snapped. “Let’s go.”
Cursing, I stumbled after him. Without Will and Kel
ly, I felt alone, adrift, lost. I had no home of my own, but they had centered me. Now…I had no one but Thane, and I wasn’t even sure if he wanted me.
My clothing was heavy, and I was cold, so cold I couldn’t feel my limbs anymore. But before I could voice my complaint, Thane disappeared around a bend ahead. Barely tired, although he had pulled me across the sea. What else could the blood drinker do that I didn’t know about? The question left me uneasy. I crossed my arms over my chest, trying to retain what little warmth my body could produce.
“Found a pier,” Thane called out.
My lungs hurt and it was hard to walk, but I quickened my steps, only to draw up short when I rounded the bend. A long, wooden platform somehow floated atop the water. At the beginning of the pier, on land, was a small wooden building. The dock and small home made me acutely aware that someone actually lived on this mound of land. I realized in that moment that I hadn’t been quite sure if I believed in their mythical man. Unnerved, I found myself studying the woods, peering at the shadows. Raven. Who was this mystery man who knew more about vampires than anyone?
“Sh…should we try to find him?” I asked through chattering teeth I couldn’t seem to stop. The icy water had entered my blood stream, had chilled my bones making them feel as brittle as glass. “As soon as possible?”
“No.” He jumped off the dock and headed toward the small house. “We need to get warm. We can explore the island later.”
Did the cold affect him as it did a normal human? He didn’t seem chilled even though the wind held a bite to it. Eager to get dry, I started toward him, only to stub my toe on a rock, reminding me I wore no shoes. The cold made the pain worse. Cringing, I hobbled on. “Can we get inside?”
“I can.”
Fortunately there was no need for force as the door opened easily under his touch. Either this Raven wasn’t expecting anyone, or he wasn’t here any longer and therefore didn’t care. Around us the island was quiet, eerily so. The few birds chirping and the lap of water against the rocky shore were the only sounds. Had he left? Perhaps we were too late.
“Come on,” Thane said. “You need to dry before you’re ill.”
Hesitantly I moved into the small building. It smelled musty, old, as if no one had been inside for some time. I hoped we weren’t on a fool’s errand, trying to find a mystery man who might not even be here.
Only a trunk and cot furnished the dusty floorboards. Two small windows allowed light into the dreary place. “Looks abandoned.”
Thane shook his head. “No cobwebs tells me someone’s been here recently.”
A shiver of nervousness whispered down my spine. So, he was still here…somewhere.
“How did he build all of this?” I reached out and lightly touched the beige curtains covering the windows. I found it odd that he would need curtains when he lived on an island, supposedly alone. “How could he have possibly gotten all this stuff from the mainland to this island?”
“My guess was it was already here. The blood drinkers probably missed the island when they set out to destroy human-made society.”
Thane closed the door, reminding me of the fact that we were the only two in the building, and it seemed even smaller with him so close. I felt Will and Kelly’s absence acutely in that tiny house and wished more than ever that they were there. The realization that Thane and I were completely alone hit me hard. Yeah, I was grateful he had saved me, but I still didn’t trust him. Frankly, I didn’t know him. Why would he save me? What was in it for him?
“Come here.” Before I could comprehend his command, he stepped forward and without my permission, he gripped my upper arms, pulling me close.
“Hey!” I snapped, struggling out of his grasp. “What are you doing?”
“Calm down. You need to get warm.” He jerked my jacket from my arms and tossed the sodden material to the ground. He was so close I could feel the heat radiating from his body. The urge to sink into him overwhelmed me.
“I can take off my own jacket,” I muttered.
“Fine.” He stepped back, paused, seemingly confused, as if he wasn’t quite sure how to react. I realized I wasn’t the only one who felt uneasy. And in that moment Thane appeared more human than he ever had before.
He raked back his hair, his gaze shifting from me, to the door, back to me. “I don’t...humans are complicated.”
“What do you mean?” I asked warily.
He sighed, annoyed. Good God, was that a blush on his cheeks? “I mean that blood drinkers are direct. They tell you exactly what they want, there is no care for other people’s feelings. But humans….they’re confusing.”
I could argue with that, but decided not to. “What are you saying?”
“I’m saying,” he snapped. “That if I seem gruff or strange, I don’t mean to.”
I stood there for a moment, letting his words sink into my muddled mind. Was Thane actually trying to apologize? Oh, how I wished Kelly was here to witness the rare incident. I doubted she would ever believe me if I retold the story.
He placed his hands on his slim hips. “Now, clothes off.”
My amusement fled. “What? No!”
“Seriously? You’re going to worry about something as asinine as being naked when your life is at stake?” He spun around and stomped toward the trunk. “You’re freezing, and I promised Will I’d make sure to keep your sorry ass alive until we saw him again.”
I wondered briefly when they’d had this talk. What else had they planned while I was unaware? But then his words truly hit me: Thane believed we would see Will again. Maybe he’d said it to make me, or himself, feel better, but I’d take it.
I rolled off my wet socks. “I have nothing to wear.”
He stood from the trunk and tossed me some folded garments.
I caught the clothes, holding them close to my sodden shirt. So, this Raven was always prepared. Did he live in this small home? “I won’t undress with you here.”
“You’re lips are blue. Stop being stupid. Undress.”
I tilted my chin stubbornly high. “When you leave.”
He started toward me, the look on his face sending me scurrying toward the far corner of the small room. “I’ll do it on my own!”
Without pause, he pulled his shirt over his head. “Hurry then.”
My throat went tight. Stunned, I merely stood there staring at his naked chest. I hadn’t realized, silly of me, that he would undress as well. I couldn’t help but notice the dips and valleys of muscle that rolled down his stomach. Not an ounce of fat. He was stunning, pure and simple. He was also covered in scars.
They resembled the scar on his face, which meant someone had taken a knife to his beautiful body. Disconcerted, I set my dry clothes on the cot. With fingers numb from cold, I somehow managed to undo the button on my trousers. While Thane was busy undressing, I rolled the damp trousers from my chilled legs. I could admit to myself he was right; I needed to get warm and fast. I’d been this cold before, once when I’d been caught in the pasture during a storm. So cold that my head pounded and my stomach clenched.
“Here.” He’d picked up the clothes and held them out. “Dress.”
We worked in silence, keeping to our own sides of the room. Not that I wasn’t completely and utterly aware of him the entire time. I watched from beneath my lashes, too curious not to. But as he reached for the button on the waistband of his trousers, my fascination gave way to embarrassment.
I’d seen men half-dressed. At camp people were very free, finding no shame as they dressed and washed in front of each other. But it wasn’t something I was used to. And for some reason it was different with Thane.
Instead of focusing on the fact that he was probably naked, I made quick work of dressing. He was right, the cold could kill me. There was no time for embarrassment. The shirt and trousers might have been large on me, but they were dry and warm and that was all that mattered.
Hugging myself tightly, attempting to war
m my chilled skin, I turned to face him. Thane’s back was to me and I could study the scars without him noticing. His body was long and lean, muscled, but it wasn’t perfect after all. Horrified and saddened, I could merely stand there and stare. I counted at least ten cuts on his arms, back and chest before his shirt fell into place.
“What happened?” I whispered before I thought better of it.
He glanced over his shoulder, wariness in his ice-blue gaze. “What?”
I flushed, realizing how rude it was of me to bring up his marks, but I couldn’t take it back now. “The scars.”
He shrugged and looked away, as if they weren’t in the least bit important. “In my early years I didn’t quite conform to the rules the beautiful ones enforced.”
So, they’d punished him with a knife to the face for merely being born, and later in life again for not thinking the way they wanted him to. Was it any wonder he was cold and distant? I would be as well if I’d gone through what he had. I bit my lower lip, feeling myself soften toward him and not liking it in the least.
“Lay down on the cot,” he demanded, as he finished dressing in nondescript gray clothing similar to mine. “We need to get warm.”
“We?” I walked to the cot, grimacing as my body protested the movement. It wasn’t just a lack of sleep that was getting to me; I’d been pushing myself too hard the last couple weeks. I lay on my side on the cot and tucked my cold hands under my head, watching Thane.
I assumed the blanket he held was for me. But when Thane lowered to the cot, lying beside me on the small bed, I stiffened, my heart leaping into my throat. Completely unconcerned, he wrapped his arm around my waist and jerked me up against his muscled form.
“What are you doing?” I asked, the words a breathless whisper. His warm scent swirled around me, curling and tiptoeing over my body until I was sure I’d never be rid of it.
“Don’t throw one of your fits.” He reached for the blanket. “The best way to get warm is body heat.”
I didn’t dare move as he pulled the blanket over us. Barely breathed as he tucked his arm under his head and closed his eyes. As the moments ticked by and as I slowly got over the shock of feeling his body molded to mine, I realized how very warm he was. I slid my chilled toes toward his feet. He didn’t even flinch when we touched. I glanced up at him. With his face relaxed, his lips slightly parted, he looked almost… human.
Emboldened, I shifted closer, sinking into his warm body, hoping he slept and wondering how much I should push my courage. When he swallowed hard, this throat working, I realized he wasn’t sleeping after all. But I was too cold and he was too warm for me to care…much.
I closed my eyes, reveling in his heat. “Do you think the others escaped?”
“I don’t know.”
A chill raced through me and I shivered, whether from the cold or my emotions, I wasn’t sure. “Oh,” I whispered. The image of Will and Kelly dying flashed to mind. I squeezed my eyes shut, refusing to dwell on it. They made it, I was sure of it.
Thane’s firm fingers suddenly gripped my wrists. Startled, I opened my eyes, but he wasn’t paying attention to me. Instead, he pulled my hands forward and slid them under his shirt, pressing them against his chest and holding them there. While I…I could merely lay there, stunned, staring at him.
He apparently understood my confusion, for he shrugged. “Your hands are freezing.”
I could feel his heart-beat, slow and steady against my palm, all too human for my liking. “And the cold doesn’t bother you?”
“Not nearly as much as it does you.”
He wasn’t completely human and he wasn’t like me, Will, or Kelly. I would not mistake his kindness for compassion. He merely wanted me alive…for some reason. “And does Raven know we’re coming?”
“I doubt he has any idea,” he replied, his warm breath stirring the hair around my forehead. “But he probably knows by now.”
Surprised, I pulled my hands away, preparing to jump from the cot, but Thane’s arm held me tight. “Don’t worry,” he said softly, his eyes still closed. “I’ll keep watch.”
He didn’t seem like he was keeping watch. I tried to relax, but it was impossible. Did Raven know? Was he watching us even now? And why did Thane not seem concerned?
“Tell me about the beautiful ones,” I asked, desperate to dwell on something other than my own troublesome thoughts.
“Almost two-hundred years ago, humans ruled this world.” His arm slid around my waist, his palm flat to my back, so very warm. “Vampires lived in the shadows, worried that they would be caught, fearing they’d be destroyed. But then, while the humans were fighting each other, a blood drinker decided to act. He took control, told the other blood drinkers that they shouldn’t have to hide. He started a revolution.”
The world around me was fading, his voice a soft song that lulled me toward slumber. “Are they human?” I murmured. I wasn’t quite sure why he was telling me this story, but I didn’t want him to stop. I liked the sound of his voice; it made me feel safe, secure.
“There are some who believe that vampires and humans shared a common ancestor thousands of years ago. They say it was a combination of mutant genes and environment that changed us.”
“Their names. They’re Greek or Roman, right?”
He released a soft laugh. “Yes. Arrogant, to say the least. They only use the names of gods, of course.”
I snuggled closer, pressing the side of my face to his shoulder. “And your name?”
“A minor god of death.”
“Death.” Half his words made no sense, but I liked hearing him talk, the rumble of his chest as he spoke fascinated me. “And do you think humans will ever regain control?”
He shrugged. “Maybe, with the right training, and if you can get the dhampir on your side.”
Hadn’t Will said the dhampir wouldn’t work with us? Confused, I tried to remember, but it was so hard to think when Thane was slowly moving his hand up and down my spine, stroking my back. The small building grew quiet. The only sound was the lap of water against the dock outside.
I couldn’t sleep, wouldn’t. He was finally answering my questions. Yet, I was tired, so very tired. “And blood…”
“Blood nourishes the body. It is the life force that keeps us all going, even humans.” I wasn’t sure, but thought I felt his hand brush against my hair. Everything had grown blessedly numb and heavy. “But for vampires it’s even more important.”
I took in a deep breath, soaking in his sweet, musky scent. Decades from now, if I still lived, I swore I would be able to recognize that scent blindfolded. “Can they eat other things?”
“They can. But it doesn’t keep them alive. They need blood to live.”
“So…take away the blood and you take away their survival.”
“I suppose.” He shifted his leg so that it rested over mine. I didn’t dare protest, he was too warm. “But it’s impossible to take away blood. You can’t stop it from flowing through your veins. No living being can. And as you’ll always have blood in your body, you’ll always be their source of food.”
I forced my lashes to lift, meeting his gaze. “And you?”
His eyes were open, alert. “I can survive on regular food, but it makes me weak. Blood gives me strength.”
He wasn’t weak now, far from it. So where was he getting his blood? I licked my suddenly dry lips. Although exhaustion pulled down on me, begging me to rest, I couldn’t close my eyes. He might have saved me, but I couldn’t trust Thane. I wouldn’t. I had to stay alert…somehow.
“Sleep,” he said softly. “I’ll guard you.”
Guard me from whom, I wanted to ask? The only threat nearby was him. “That’s not really fair, is it? You need rest too.”
The cabin had grown dark, the sun had set. But I could just see his lips quirk and knew he smiled. I wanted him to say more, but I was so very tired. “I don’t need as much sleep as you.”
“Ye
s, but…”
He lowered his head so that his lips were a mere breath away, his glowing gaze focused on my eyes, and I was falling…falling within their depths. “Sleep, Jane. Sleep.”
“Yes.” The heaviness grew, pressing down on me. My lashes fluttered, my eyes closing. I couldn’t last any longer. I knew in the deep recesses of my mind that I was going to fall asleep and I couldn’t stop myself. “Okay.”
With Thane’s lips so close to mine that I could feel his warm breath, I allowed my body to sink into temptation, giving into the darkness I so craved.