Chapter 4.
With each new day the alpha became more and more aggressive toward the maturing young male. His unusual behaviors and extended absence from the group had apparently not gone unnoticed. The time was growing near when the young male would have to either leave the family, or challenge the alpha for leadership. Though he had become proficient with his new skills, still he was unsure that he was ready for a confrontation.
The day finally came when the decision was taken out of his hands. For several days now the alpha had been increasingly irritable. He had been stomping around aggressively, cuffing the young ones and forcing both males and females to submit to his dominance. Always when this happened he would glower at his perceived rival, grunting and snarling his displeasure.
Finally as tensions grew, the alpha did something totally uncharacteristic. Repeatedly he began mock charges, screaming his rage at the young prospective challenger. Unbalanced by this new behavior, the now-mature male had no choice but to respond.
Backing away cautiously, he retreated to the place where he had hidden his weapon. Reaching down carefully, never taking his eyes off the alpha, he grasped the stone tightly in his hand. His heart pounding in his ears, he slowly rose to the upright stance he had practiced so often. His whole body seemed to tense with the realization that now was the time he had dreaded.
Carefully advancing to the throwing distance he had practiced, he stabilized his stance as much as was possible. Then, glaring at the alpha, he threw the stone.
At exactly that moment alpha charged. The young male had practiced well. His stance had been perfect. The stone flew through the air as if in slow motion. The throw was exactly on target.
During his practices his targets had been stationary. This target was moving! In an instant that seemed like an eternity, the stone struck. As alpha charged, the distance between them closed rapidly. The projectile struck precisely where, just a moment before, his head had been. Now, instead of cracking against his skull, the stone glanced off his muscular shoulder. Alpha was knocked only slightly off course, but screamed forward.
The young male was still standing upright in astonishment when the alpha made contact. The full weight of the charge landed squarely in his abdomen. Air flew from his lungs as he was hurtled backwards by the impact. He had barely hit the ground when the alpha was on top of him, pounding, biting and screaming rage.
Frantic for breath, all he could do was try to fend off the blows that seemed to come at him from every direction. He smelled the hot breath of his opponent and gasped for some air of his own. Searing pain shot through him as teeth sank deep into his scalp. Instantly blood gushed from the wound, filling his eyes and mouth.
Desperate to escape this impending doom, he groped feebly for anything that might help him to get away. Miraculously, his fingers closed around a small sapling. Wrenching with all his remaining strength, he slammed it down onto the back of the alpha. The impact knocked them both off balance. Alpha was momentarily stunned.
In that brief moment the young male broke free. Scrambling blindly, he crashed head-long into a growth of nearby saplings and underbrush. Thrashing wildly, bent on surviving at any cost, he staggered out on the far side. Clambering and stumbling to his feet, he limped away into the undergrowth.
For only a brief moment alpha had become disoriented and vulnerable. He recovered almost immediately, springing up to continue the battle, but nothing came. Silencing his own screams, all he heard was the cacophony of noise coming from the onlookers. The challenger was nowhere to be seen.
The noise dissipated quickly as, one by one the family gathered around the triumphant alpha, displaying profound obeisance to their leader who had once again prevailed.
Bloodied and battered, half blinded and disoriented, the defeated young male staggered on through the dense underbrush. Gradually panic gave way to shock and fatigue. Though his body desperately needed to rest, he dared not stop so close to the home-ground of his former family. He knew that to remain in the area meant another almost certain confrontation with the alpha, one which he would most certainly loose.
He continued moving away from the area, stopping only rarely to clear away the blood which had begun to cake around the open gash in his scalp. The bleeding finally stopped. But his head throbbed with pain.
He chose a familiar path for his escape. The family had only recently come this way. They had foraged efficiently a few days before, clearing trees and bushes of all but the least ripe fruit. It was unlikely that they would return.
Overcome with fatigue, he stopped to rest under the tree where he had nested several days before. Discarded pieces of over-ripe fruit lay strewn about the base of the tree. Desperate to regain some strength, he wolfed down all that was within his reach, ignoring the acrid taste and smell. His stomach wretched, but he forced himself to keep the rancid food down. His eyes streamed water as he struggled to keep from vomiting.
His hunger somewhat satiated, he slowly began to relax. His taut muscles un-knotted as nourishment replaced adrenaline that had so recently coursed through his veins. His eyelids became heavy though he tried vainly to remain alert. Soon he dozed into a fitful sleep in the cool shade of the tree.
Some time later he awoke to the sounds of approaching dusk. Crickets and frogs had begun venturing out from their hiding places as darkness drew near. Still disoriented by the pain in his head, he climbed slowly into the safety of the branches above. Finding his old sleeping nest, he settled into its familiar comfort, pulling leafy branches close for warmth and security.
As darkness settled around him, he listened with a new intensity to the sounds of the night. No longer did he hear the familiar stirrings of his family members. Gone were the tell-tale grunts and rustlings of family members as they settled into sleep. Absent were the reassuring sounds the infants made as they suckled and cooed contentedly at their mothers’ breasts.
With only few exceptions, night times had always been the same. Even after his “awakening,” the familiarity of family life had been a source of comfort.
Though he recognized the change within his mind, he had come to realize that it was not at all obvious to the others around him. He came to understand that the self-awareness he now possessed had now alienated him from the others in a way that only he understood. But not until this night, wounded and beaten, did he realize that he was uniquely and utterly alone.
The next morning he awoke un-rested and weary. The pain from his wounded scalp stabbed at his concentration. The memory of his defeat tore at him in a way he had never before experienced. All the planning and practicing he had done had availed him nothing. Instead of winning him the coveted place of dominance, his efforts had rendered him a wounded outcast, bereft of familial security, stripped of the status he had worked so hard to achieve. In a primitive and fundamental way he wondered if his new-found ability had become more a burden than a boon.
The “awakening” he had experienced contained many ramifications that were not at first easily discerned. His new-found reasoning capability had enabled him to manipulate his environment in ways that he would previously not have been able to do, let alone comprehend.
Tool usage had been a very limited part of his upbringing prior to the “change.” He had observed his mother and other adults using stones as hammers to open seed pods. They had used twigs to fish succulent insects out of termite mounds. In his youth he had mimicked their behaviors and had eventually become reasonably proficient in doing so himself. But once he had mastered these behaviors his consideration and curiosity had advanced no further.
Now, foraging alone in his solitude, he began to realize how his thought processes had changed. He was becoming able to conceptualize his experiences. What had before been essentially a mimicking process was now perceived in a much more complex way. He was now able to understand how a stone or a stick might be used for more than just one purpose. Experimentation was now deliberate rather than random.
His s
olitary experiments had taught him much, but his defeat had taught him much more. He realized that his new skills could be effective, but only under specifically controlled circumstances. He had become comfortable with the results of his practice sessions. But when he applied them in a combat situation he had failed to recognize that he was no longer in complete control of the situation. In his mind he had imagined the confrontation as being static. Under those conditions he had become proficient in hitting a stationary target consistently. What he had failed to anticipate was that his opponent might do something unpredictable, like move out of the path of the projectile. The implication had become painfully obvious.
Over the next several weeks the wound on his head healed, leaving a long, jagged scar just above his right eyebrow. From time to time he would touch it tenderly, feeling rough skin where before smooth fir had been. Each time he did so his memory went back to that terrible day when the exercise of his new abilities had nearly cost him his life.
In his solitude he had learned to fend for himself. He managed to find sustenance, though not in the quantities to which he had previously become accustomed. He had taken to following his old family, scrounging through their leavings for what food he could find. He had deliberately stayed one or two days behind so as not to attract attention.
Though he was becoming accustomed to being alone, still at times he yearned for the security and comfort of belonging that he had enjoyed with his family. Also never far from his consciousness, the drive to procreate nagged at him.
The skills he had learned were still with him. But he had deliberately neglected to use them, fearing that somehow, using them might result in something terrible happening again. Still, as time went by, his fears became less and his curiosity began to dominate.
Over time his fear of confrontation began to be outweighed by his need for interaction with others of his own kind. He was, after all, a social animal. Day by day he ventured closer to the clan, always wary of being seen by the alpha male. He risked his safety just for the chance sighting of anyone familiar. Invariably the only ones he saw were adolescents skirting the perimeter of the group. Mature females and infants remained in the center, always under alpha’s watchful eye.
Gradually his courage returned. The reasoning process he had so recently acquired was becoming more fine-tuned. With his growing understanding came increased confidence. He was now able to view the events that led up to his banishment more objectively. Having reached this new plateau in his development, he resolved to resume refining his skills with weapons.
In the beginning he had practiced throwing at stationary targets set at a consistent distance. His accuracy had improved rapidly as a result. But what his primitive reasoning had failed to recognize initially was that his opponent had the ability to move about. Now, lightly touching the still-sensitive scar above his eye and remembering, he knew he much modify his tactics if he was to be successful in any future confrontations.
He began by practicing with targets at varying distances. As his accuracy improved, he began focusing his attention on technique. Owing to his short bowed legs and his overly long upper body, he was inherently unstable in an upright position. This resulted in his throw lacking significant power. When he threw harder he became even more unbalanced.
To this point he had kept both feet firmly planted on the ground, even grasping ground-level vines with his toes (which more resembled and functioned like fingers). This had helped somewhat, but his upper body had still remained relatively stationary. The throwing power thus generated came almost exclusively through his shoulder, elbow and wrist joints.
When he moved about looking for suitable stones to throw, he walked on all fours. Then, after picking up a stone and holding it in his left hand, he used a three-point walking technique. Once, while walking this way, it dawned on him how very stable his body felt in a three-point stance. He tried throwing in this position, but quickly realized that all he could accomplish was a weak under-handed throw. Standing upright, he had been able to thrown over-hand, though with less stability.
Intrigued by this new discovery, he tried something new. Standing upright, he held the stone in his left hand. He drew the stone back behind him as his upper body rotated to the left. Then, while forcefully drawing the stone up and over; he rotated his shoulders to the right, dropped his right hand to the ground, and released the stone at the top of the arc. The result was a smooth follow-through that lent greater force to the throw, while at the same time stabilizing his stance. After only a few throws, he was able to consistently hit his targets.
At first the loud crack the stone made upon impact startled him. Crouching low, he listened intently, breath caught in his throat. Fearing that the sound might draw unwanted attention, he remained motionless for several minutes. When nothing unusual happened he began breathing easier.
The implications of what he had accomplished elated him. The possibility of issuing another challenge for leadership now seemed to be once again within his reach. He consciously admitted to himself that access to the females was his primary motivation. Even as he practiced the new throwing technique, his drive to procreate remained constant in his thoughts.
As he pondered the possibilities, he knew that his first confrontation with the alpha male had been ill-prepared. The unanticipated reaction of the leader had taken him totally by surprise. Instead of remaining stationary, as he had done in the past; alpha had charged forward, avoiding a direct hit from the on-coming projectile.
He remembered how the glancing blow to alpha’s shoulder had not had any noticeable effect. The impact had not opened a wound. The charge had continued unabated. Now he wondered; even if the projectile had found its mark, would it have inflicted sufficient harm to stop the charge? Consumed with concern, he redoubled his efforts. He chose heavier stones and exerted all his might trying to increase accuracy as well as force. Day after day his throwing skill improved.
Though his confidence continued to increase, loneliness continued to plague him. Regardless of his new skills (physical and mental), he was, after all, still a social animal. In the evenings, when daylight began to recede, he would lay quietly in his nest, gazing sleepily up into the sky. As darkness descended, sounds of the night enveloped him. They reminded him of the security and inner peace he had taken for granted when he was still a part of the clan. He remembered how the spats he had had with the other young males had upset him. Now he realized that in their way they had been an integral part of his sense of well-being. Even the apprehension he had felt, watching alpha fight to retain dominance, had contributed to his sense of belonging.
Often he awoke suddenly in the darkness, remnants of a dream troubling him. Indistinct scenes flashed though his mind: A newborn clinging to its mother’s fir, whimpering quietly, eyes wide with fear; fleeting glances cast his way by an unknown young female, penetrating deep into him; huge dark shapes looming over him as he cowered, frozen with fear, trying vainly to disappear into himself. Always the dreams were the same. Always the feelings of helplessness; always the sense of foreboding; always the answer . . . indistinct . . . just beyond reach; always . . . the eyes!
Every day he ventured closer to the clan. Longingly he watched from his cover as familiar scenes passed before him; toddlers playing in the sun; young males testing one another; alpha moving about the clan, pausing here and there to grunt at or stare down an individual who caught his attention; the females. . . .
Reluctantly he would back away, retreating once again into his solitude, plagued by the growing demand for resolution. Stoically he would resume his regimen, throwing stones, wielding sticks, wrestling with the inevitability of making the all-important decision.
Unknown to him as he continued practicing his skills, he had not gone unnoticed. Deep in the cover of undergrowth, other eyes watched.