Olivia scurried off and I knew that I had made a big mistake. Again.
It was raining, so we were confined to the cafeteria. My mood was darker than the cloudy sky. Monet still wasn’t talking to me.
I surveyed the room, gripping my tray. Where was I supposed to sit? Monet wasn’t in the caf. She was probably holed up in the art room with Scott. Maybe even making a little voodoo doll of me. The girl had skills.
Vanessa and Haley waved to me. “Sophie, over here.”
They were sharing a table with a couple of girls from drama, but from the way Haley had her back to them, she made it clear she wasn’t sitting with them. I sat between them, in the no-man’s-land between popular and forgettable.
“Hi, Sophie,” Ava said.
Haley nudged me, then deliberately turned her back. I was tired of talking only to the popular people.
“Hi,” I said. “Hey, did you have fun at that concert?”
“I can’t believe you missed it,” Ava said. “Next time you should go with us.”
I smiled at her. “Maybe I will. Let me know.”
Haley nudged me again, but I ignored her. I wasn’t going to let her tell me who I could talk to. I was so over that. Why did she care who I talked to, anyway? Did popularity have to mean I acted like a snob?
Dev stomped up and grabbed my arm. “I need to talk to you. Alone.”
“Well, hello to you, too,” Haley said with a pout.
Dev ignored her and steered me into the empty hallway. “I want you to stop those rumors about us,” he said.
“Yanking me out of the caf wasn’t exactly the best way to go about it,” I said mildly.
“I don’t have time for your crap today,” he said. “Monet is acting like I peed in her cornflakes or something. And all everyone is talking about is—”
“Is us,” I finished for him.
“Yes,” he said furiously. “God, are you so concerned about being popular that you had to spread that rumor?”
Ice settled in my stomach. I opened my mouth to deny it, but then I snapped it closed as just as quickly. Why did Dev always think the worst of me?
“How do I know that you didn’t start that rumor?” I asked him.
“Get over yourself, Sophie Donnelly,” he said. “I would never tell anyone that I’d kissed you. I’m ashamed of myself.”
“Then why did you kiss me?” I practically shouted.
“Keep your voice down,” Dev said. “Or is that part of your plan?”
“Now who needs to get over himself? You didn’t answer the question. Why did you kiss me if I’m so repulsive?”
“I—I felt sorry for you,” he said.
“You felt sorry for me?” I said. Fury surged through my veins. Was he trying to humiliate me even more than I already was? “Well, don’t. There are plenty of guys who want to kiss me.”
“Only the stupid ones, like Tanner,” he hissed. “Or the desperate ones, like Jason Brady.”
I froze. “I think you’ve said enough.”
I went back to the caf. That’s what Dev really thought of me? That you had to be stupid or desperate to kiss me?
Was that what everyone else thought? No wonder I wasn’t popular any longer.
“Sophie, have you seen this?” Ava waved her phone in front of me.
“What is it?”
“It’s the latest hotness poll,” she replied.
“So?” I said indifferently.
“You don’t seem very excited about it,” she said. She pointed to something on the screen.
“What are you talking about?”
“You’re number one, baby,” she said.
“What? That can’t be right.” I grabbed the phone from her hands.
I stared at the words in front of me. Apparently, I had regained my hotness. And it didn’t take a boyfriend or trashing another girl to do it. Who knew? And now that I was back on top, I was surprised to find I didn’t even care.
“Are you okay?” Ava said.
“I’m fine,” I said. “Just surprised. Thanks for telling me.” I handed the phone back to her.
“What was that all about, with you and Dev? He seemed angry about something.”
I found myself telling her the whole pathetic story. “And the worst part is that Monet is furious with me.”
“Do you like her brother?”
“I don’t know. Sometimes I think I hate him,” I replied honestly. “But I’m not sure if he likes me.”
“Oh, you have it bad.”
I was very afraid Ava was right.
Chapter 20
Ava took pity on me in my friendless state. “Want to go see a movie this weekend?” she asked.
“Are you sure you want to be seen with me?”
“I think I can take the heat,” she replied.
“Cool.”
We went to see the latest blockbuster. It wasn’t really Ava’s cup of tea, but I think she suggested it in the hopes of cheering me up. I avoided the Good & Plenty and opted for the more substantial nachos.
“Nothing like a cheesy flick to make me feel better,” I said, propping my feet up on the row in front of me.
“Can’t I take you anywhere?” she said. “That,” she pointed to my feet, “is just rude. Somebody’s head is gonna be there in a few minutes. Would you want your hair up against someone’s feet?”
She was right. I put my feet down. “Sorry.”
“No worries,” she said. “Now, hand over some of those nachos.”
We’d gotten there early because Ava insisted on getting seats in the back row.
“I forgot to get a soda,” I said. “I’m heading to the snack bar. You want anything?”
“No, thanks,” she replied.
There was a long line at the snack bar, so I decided to hit the restroom before the movie started. When I walked in, I saw Olivia Kaplan fixing her makeup at the mirror and then heard a familiar voice emanating from one of the stalls.
“Can you believe she’s here with that fat lesbo? And to think Sophie used to be popular. But I fixed her.” A little chuckle followed.
Olivia’s eyes met mine in the mirror. She opened her mouth to say something, but I shook my head and she froze.
“Is that Haley Owens’s voice I hear?”
Silence. Then, “Sophie, I didn’t know you were here. I’ll be right out.”
She emerged from the stall and rushed to give me a hug. I sidestepped her. “I interrupted you in the middle of a story. Please go on.”
“I—I—I was just joking,” she stuttered. “I knew you were there all along.”
“Haley, I know it was you who took that photo of me at the dance,” I said. “And I was prepared to forgive you, but don’t talk trash about my friends.” I leaned in closer and said softly, so that only she could hear, “And if I ever hear that you called Ava names again, I’ll personally see to it that a few photos of you are passed around.”
A little louder, I said, “Good, I’m glad we understand each other. Have a nice day.” Score one for my big mouth!
I swept from the room, leaving Olivia and Haley gaping. They deserved each other. How could I have been stupid enough to think Haley was my friend? Olivia was bad, spreading malicious gossip, but she was open about it. Haley was worst of all, pretending to be my friend while stabbing me in the back.
“You were gone a long time,” Ava observed when I returned.
I handed her a pack of gummi bears. She loved gummi bears. “Here.”
“What are these for?”
“They’re a thank-you,” I said, “for being a good friend.”
Just then, Dev and Beth walked in. I ducked down in my seat. “Oh, no.”
“What is it?”
I motioned to where they stood, scanning the theater to find seats. It was crowded, but there were seats next to us.
“Do you want to leave?” Ava said.
“No, of course not,” I said.
But she wasn’t convinced. “Let’s get ou
t of here,” she said. “We can watch the movie in the next theater. C’mon, before they see us.”
But it was too late. “Hi, Ava. Hi, Sophie. Do you mind if we sit here?” Beth asked.
What could I say? “Of course not.”
It was almost worth my own discomfort when I saw Dev’s expression.
“I’ll get us some snacks,” he said. He practically bolted down the aisle, as if fleeing the scene of a crime.
Beth chatted away, completely oblivious to my discomfort.
Ava shot me a puzzled look, but I shook my head. Beth wasn’t doing it on purpose, at least I didn’t think she was. She wasn’t aware of the gossip about Dev and me because she was too much of a straight edge to listen to it.
When Dev got back, the only seat left was the one next to me. He sat there because he didn’t have any other choice, but I could tell he’d rather be anywhere else.
Thankfully, the movie started, which discouraged any conversation. Beth, I noticed, talked during movies.
I kept my eyes on the screen but was hyperaware of Dev’s every move. I swore I would kill him if he made a move on Beth in front of me, but he kept his hands firmly on his own side of the armrest.
Still, I was consumed with jealousy.
His leg bumped against mine once and he whispered a “sorry,” but other than that, we didn’t exchange one single word.
It was the longest hour and a half of my life. When the lights went up, I practically bolted down the aisle.
Outside, Ava looked at me. “So, how did you like the movie?” she said deadpan, but I could see the twinkle in her eye.
“That wasn’t funny,” I said, “it was horrible. You have the worst taste in movies.”
We burst into hysterical laughter.
Chapter 21
No, no, no,” Mr. Fanelli shouted. “Try it again. And, Dev, this time, kiss her like you mean it, not like you’re kissing your grandmother.” We were practicing the wedding scene and Fanelli had it in his head that we needed a big kiss at the end.
“Can’t we just stage kiss? The audience can’t even tell the difference, anyway,” I pleaded. I mean, how embarrassing. Dev wasn’t even trying to hide his reluctance to put his lips on mine.
“I can tell,” Mr. Fanelli replied, “so no, you can’t. We are striving for authenticity, Sophie. We want the audience to think that you and Dev are passionately in love, carried away, transported.”
“Let’s just get this over with,” I said to Dev. He grunted, which was what passed for communication from him these days.
He put his arms around me, but it looked artificial, even to me. There was no feeling in his arms or his lips. I kept my own lips firmly closed.
Mr. Fanelli clapped his hands again. “Wait, wait,” he said. “This is not working. We need fire.” He snapped his fingers. “Angie, Connor, come show Sophie and Dev how it’s done.”
“Great,” I whispered furiously to Dev, “now we have to take kissing lessons from Connor.”
“Not if I can help it,” Dev said. He grabbed me and planted a long, slow kiss on my lips. He moved to the curve of my cheek and murmured, “Kiss me back, Sophie.”
So I did. Wildly. Gladly. Passionately. I forgot about our audience, forgot that I was angry with him, and forgot everything except the feeling of him pressed against me.
The sound of applause brought me to my senses, and I ended the kiss. The cast finally went back to what they were doing, Connor frowned, and Dev disappeared, but I still stood there.
Monet bustled up with the pretense of showing me something. “Don’t stand there like a guppy with your mouth open, Sophie.”
They were the first words she’d spoken to me in days. “We were just acting,” I said quickly.
“I get it now,” she said.
“Get what?” But she ignored me and went back to her clipboard.
When Mr. Fanelli called a five-minute break, I decided to pass out the cookies I’d made the night before.
“Can I talk to you?”
It was Connor. I handed him a chocolate chip cookie and then remembered that they were his favorite. So what? I told myself, they were everybody’s favorite.
Connor led me to a corner of the auditorium, but I balked. “I’m not having an audience to our conversation. Not again. Whatever you have to say to me, you need to say it in private.”
“Okay, that’s fair. Hallway okay?”
I poked my head out the door and surveyed the hallway. Deserted. “Make it quick.”
He followed me out. “I wanted to say something,” he began. He gave me his trademark roguish grin, the one he used to charm me into going out with him in the first place. If I knew my ex-boyfriend, he was about to ask me for a favor.
“You may have heard that Angie and I have been having some problems lately.”
“I never listen to idle gossip,” I replied. Hey, if you can’t lie to an ex-boyfriend, who can you lie to?
“It’s just not working out. I was so stupid before, the way I treated you. And you’re so great…”
Oh, no. It couldn’t be. Dread filled my stomach. Connor couldn’t be asking me out again, could he? As he spoke, I realized that I was completely and utterly over him. I wouldn’t take him back even if it meant that I would never be popular again.
“Connor, listen, you’re great, too, but I’m not into you anymore.”
He looked startled. “I know that.”
“You do?”
“Yes, but I thought maybe you could talk to Angie. Let her know that I’m a great catch. That kind of thing. I think she might be losing interest.”
Was it possible that Connor was actually unsure of himself? He was, probably for the first time ever.
“I don’t know,” I replied. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Anything.” He smiled charmingly.
“Tell me why you dumped me in the first place.” Monet said I never learned, but maybe I could learn from this.
“I don’t know why,” he said.
“Of course you do,” I replied. “You’re just afraid that if you tell me, I’ll get mad and do something stupid.”
“Won’t you?”
I winced. “Probably,” I admitted. “But I’m trying not to.”
He shrugged. “Remember when we met? You were kind of awkward and a little shy. I thought you needed me. But after a while, it seemed like the only thing you needed was to be talked about, no matter how you went about doing it.”
“You liked me because I needed rescuing?”
“Everyone needs to be needed,” he said. “I did care about you, but it started to feel like you didn’t really care about me. Angie did.”
I didn’t say anything. I stood there trying to absorb what he was saying.
“That’s it? No scenes, no drama?”
“Nope.”
He grinned. “Why, Sophie, I believe you must be changing.”
“So what exactly do you want me to do?” I wasn’t going to completely transform, at least not overnight, anyhow. These things take time.
“I want you to convince Angie that there are no hard feelings.”
“Why does she care?”
“She thinks it was bad for her image, the way I broke up with you. She wants us to hang out to show everyone that everything’s okay.”
Translation: She was worried that everyone thought she was a boyfriend-stealing ho.
“Why should I do this for you?” Or for Angie, for that matter. But maybe it would give me some sort of closure. It took a lot of energy to hate someone.
“Why? You have firsthand experience. I was a good boyfriend to you, and I’d be a good friend.” He said it with such confidence that I didn’t have the heart to point out that good boyfriends don’t dump their girlfriends in public.
“I’ll try, Connor, but I can’t make any promises.”
“Let’s meet at Wicked Jack’s later tonight.”
“Tonight?” It wasn’t like I had anything better to do.
/>
“Please?” he said.
“Angie has to come, too.” The last thing I needed was new rumors about Connor and me getting back together or something ridiculous like that.
“Then you’ll do it? Sophie, I love you!” He picked me up and whirled me around.
“Put me down,” I said, but I was laughing as I said it. Connor’s exuberance was contagious.
“Not until you say yes.”
“Yes, yes. I’ll meet you tonight. Now put me down before someone sees us.”
But someone already had. Dev was glowering at us from the doorway of the auditorium. “They need us,” he said curtly.
Connor set me down, and we followed Dev back into rehearsal. Connor wandered off and I was left to deal with Dev.
“What’s your problem?” I said, but he didn’t answer.
We went through another scene, thankfully not one in which we were supposed to kiss.
Mr. Fanelli called out, “Okay, people. Let’s call it a night. Dress rehearsal on Thursday. Don’t be late.”
Connor and I left together and waited for Angie by his car. We were heading to the restaurant as soon as she managed to tear herself away from whatever it was that she was doing. The waiting was irritating me and I looked at my watch again.
“You can ride with us, you know,” Connor said.
“Now you’re pushing it,” I said.
Dev walked by us.
“Good night, Dev,” I called out, but he ignored me and got into his car. A minute later, it tore out of the parking lot.
“What’s with him?” Connor said. But the subject was dropped when he saw Angie.
“Let’s get this over with,” she said.
“Hey, I’m the one doing you two a favor,” I said. “I’m not the one who broke up a happy couple.”
She observed me for a long minute. “You have a point,” she said. “But let’s call it a mutually beneficial endeavor.”
I hated it, but she thought like me. And she was right. Monet still wasn’t talking to me, and I needed all the friendly encounters I could get.
Chapter 22
The dinner with my former boyfriend and my archrival was a success. The rumor mill had done its job and spread the word of our amicable outing at Wicked Jack’s.