CHAPTER 11
“All right, ladies,” Janine said with a smile, “let’s lean back against our significant others. Get comfortable. Relax.”
Dan was sitting against the wall, his legs spread apart, with Jess positioned between them. As ordered by their tiny, dark-haired instructor, she leaned back against his chest and tried to relax. Instead, she was tense and ill at ease. Being this intimately close to him would take some getting used to.
“Relax,” he whispered in her ear.
“Okay, folks, at this point in her labor, the mother of your child is going to be seriously contracting, and in a good deal of discomfort.”
“C’mon, Janine,” Sara, a petite mother of two, said with a laugh. “You know darned well that labor is a whole lot more than uncomfortable, so why not be honest and just say we’ll be in a lot of pain?”
Very early in to the first class it became clear that Sara was the most experienced mother in the small group of seven couples. Having already given birth to two babies, she didn’t hesitate to let the others know when their instructor tried to whitewash certain aspects of childbirth.
“All right,” Janine sighed, glancing pointedly at Sara. “You’re going to be in a lot of pain, and it’s up to you men to help them out. What I want you to do is stroke her stomach in big, soft circles.”
Jess felt Dan’s gentle touch on her stomach, and his breath in her hair, as his chin rested against the side of her head. She closed her eyes and tried to enjoy the light massage.
“Okay. We’ve got a contraction coming up. Jess, Melanie, open your eyes, and concentrate on your breathing. Deep chest breathing, in through your nose, and out through your mouth. Focus on whatever object you’ve chosen. Coaches, this is important. Don’t forget it on your way to the hospital. Okay, let’s begin – now.”
“Slow down, Jess. That’s it. In through your nose, out through your mouth. Good girl. You’re doing fine.” Dan’s voice was quiet and reassuring, as the caresses on her stomach continued. Jess focused on the stuffed Pooh bear she’d chosen to concentrate on. From the way their instructor talked, whatever they chose would have the power to take her mind off the pain. Sara said it didn’t really, but Jess was hopeful. “You’re doing great.”
“Reaching the peak now. Keep breathing. This is the point where some of you may begin to consider the choices available to you for pain,” Janine explained. “. Muscle relaxants, epidurals. You should discuss them with your doctor before labor. Just try not to make that decision during a contraction. Okay. Take a deep, cleansing breath. Not you, guys. I was talking to the ladies.”
“Look at Mark,” Dan murmured, suppressing a chuckle. Jess noted the youngest father-to-be was looking rather pale and strained. “Anyone would think Emily was having the baby now.”
“He does look petrified, doesn’t he?” Jess agreed, grinning.
“Your contractions will be coming closer together now,” Janine was saying. “If you remember your breathing techniques, you should be able to get through your labor without drugs. But don’t be ashamed if you can’t. Every woman is different, and the level of pain you can tolerate is unique to you.”
“Is there anything we can take?” one of the guys joked.
“How about a hike?” Janine suggested, grinning at him. “That’s it for tonight. Remember to practice everything we’ve learned so far. Next week we have the film you’ve all been waiting for.”
“You mean the one about the birth?” Mark asked, paling even more. Everyone chuckled.
“That’s the one. See you next week.”
Jess scooted forward so Dan could stand and pull her to her feet. She found it impossible these days to get up from the floor without some sort of assistance, be it from Dan, or by using a piece of furniture for leverage. And she still had seven weeks of fun left.
“Pizza?” Dan asked, holding her arm with one hand, while carrying two pillows and Pooh in the other.
“And brownies?”
They had gotten into the habit of stopping off for supper after class, and Jess was famished, relieved when they were both buckled in and heading for her favorite place. For some reason Dan started to laugh.
“What?” she asked, curious to know what he found amusing.
“Mark.”
“Poor kid. You really should be sorry for him.” But Jess laughed, too. On one hand, she did feel bad for the young man. On the other, he was providing a good deal of comic relief for the members of the class.
“I can’t wait until next week. Ten to one he’s going to pass out.” Dan sounded like he almost hoped he would. Not in a mean spirited way, Jess knew, because there wasn’t a mean bone in his body.
“I wouldn’t be surprised. He doesn’t look old enough to be married, let alone about to become a father.”
“Emily is going to have to pull him through her labor, not the other way around.”
“I don’t know. He might come through for her. You should talk to him.”
“Not me,” he said, shaking his head. “I’ve got my own wife to worry about.”
His own wife. He always made comments like that lately, and it sounded like the most normal thing in the world. So much so that Jess often forgot that there wasn’t much that was normal about their marriage.
Her stomach chose that moment to growl, and they both chuckled. There were definitely more important things to think about at the moment, and that was – per usual – food.
Still, she thought, the next morning as she sorted clothes for the wash, she felt married to Dan. More so than she’d ever felt to Frank. A honeymoon wasn’t day-to-day living, and she and Frank hadn’t had a chance to share that. If truth be told, she actually knew more about Dan than she’d ever known about her first husband.
Dan always bit down on the tip of his pen when he was writing listings for his houses, searching for just the right words to entice a buyer. He liked to relax with a current Dean Koontz book, and always used a book mark, never folding a corner to keep his place. He always kicked off his right boot first when he walked in the back door.
He hated liver, and had a long-standing love affair with the mound of bacon he fried up every Saturday morning. Silly things she noticed about him that she’d never noticed about Frank.
The only common thought she had about the two men was that each of them were handsome, and too sexy for her own good. Except the thoughts were directed less and less at the memory of Frank, and more often at Dan.
As the days and weeks passed, Dan filled nearly all of her waking thoughts. He was even finding his way into her dreams, unnerving dreams of a real marriage, real in every way.
She threw the whites into the washer, adding soap and bleach, and tried to think of other things. Like what to fix for supper. That didn’t stop her thoughts from straying to her the state of her marriage though. She wasn’t sure anything could distract her that much.
~~~~~
“How go the classes?” Nate asked, sauntering into Dan’s office and perching on the edge of his desk. He laughed when Dan told him about Mark, and Jess’s request that he offer some assistance. “Well, it couldn’t hurt your cause.”
“What do you mean?” Dan shoved the pile of papers he’d been reading away and leaned back to look at his father.
“She already looks at you like some knight in shining armor. You’d probably be an even bigger hero if you helped that other couple.”
“I don’t like to get involved in other people’s lives, Dad.”
“Right That’s why you married Jess?”
“Did Jess call you? You’re ganging up on me, right?” But he knew he’d have a chat with Mark and sighed. “I give up.”
“On Jess?”
“Never.”
“Are you making progress in that direction?”
“Not as much as I’d like.”
“Give it time, son. She’s had a rough year. You can’t expect too much too soon.”
~~~~~
“Since your doc
tor probably isn’t going to let us sit on the floor at the hospital when the time comes,” Dan decided that weekend, “we’re not going to practice here anymore. Come on.”
He seemed a little nervous as took her hand and led her through the house, up the stairs, and to his room.
“This will be much more comfortable,” he murmured. Jess could only stare at the bed in stunned surprise.
He arranged the pillows on the bed so they would offer some back support, sat down, and motioned for Jess to join him. She hesitated for a second. Yes, it would be more comfortable, but Dan’s bed? Oh man.... She mulled over Emma’s last comments. It was good they were having lunch again on Monday. She needed to talk.
“Jess?” His voice jolted her out of her thoughts, and she saw him holding out his arms. “Practice, remember?”
Self-consciously, Jess positioned herself against him, and tried not to be so acutely aware of their location. She could hardly breathe as his fingers began their caressing movements. What had seemed mostly natural in class seemed pretty darned sensual here.
“You’re not relaxing,” he accused, his voice soft. How could he not be as uncomfortable with this as she was?
“I’m trying.”
“Breathe. In through your nose, out through your mouth. That’s it. Much better. No. You’re tensing again.”
“We forgot the bear. Maybe that’s the problem,” she said nervously. What would he think if he knew what his touch was doing to her? Certainly not relaxing her. No, it was waking feelings she thought had died with Frank.
“Look at something on the dresser then.”
“What?”
“I don’t know.” He waved his arm around the room. “A picture. Or a bottle of cologne. Whatever you want to focus on.”
A bottle of cologne. Okay. Jess tried her best, but his touch was sending currents of desire coursing through her. She closed her eyes and gave in to the pleasure, dropping her head back against his shoulder.
~~~~~
“Jess, you’re not trying very hard. Breathe.” At least she was beginning to relax. He looked down at her and grinned broadly. She wasn’t just relaxing, she was enjoying this.
“I think I’m a little tired,” she murmured.
“Did you take your nap today?” he asked softly, desperately wanting to kiss her neck.
“Mmm. No. I forgot.”
“No wonder. You need your rest.”
“I know.”
“Jess-” Dan reached up and turned her face toward his as she opened her eyes. The tension was almost palpable as they looked at one another, and then Dan’s face lowered until his lips covered hers.
His arm tightened around her, and she moaned softly as the kiss deepened, his hand cupping her cheek so she had no choice but to stay there until he decided to let her go. Not that she protested. She was definitely kissing him back, with enthusiasm. And then, as suddenly as he’d started, Dan stopped and leaned his forehead against her hair.
“I think maybe you’d best get to bed,” he said gently, a tremor in his voice.
“That would probably be a good idea,” Jess whispered. He wasn’t sure she understood what he’d said, and she didn’t move so much as one little muscle.
“Jess, we need to stop this. Now.” Carefully, he pushed her away repeating, “You really should go to your room. You didn’t get a nap today. You need some sleep.”
“Bed?” She did sit up then, eyes wide, and struggled off the bed, her face flaming. “Dan, I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me.”
“Jess,” he called out as she fled from the room. Her door slammed before his feet hit the floor, and he cursed softly.
She didn’t understand. The only reason he’d called a halt was because he didn’t want things to happen so fast she might regret them in the morning. He couldn’t stand that.
Flopping back down on the mattress, the water rocking him gently, he wondered if he should seek some advice on how to court his wife. Maybe Emma could help. She knew her better than anyone. He’d phone her on Monday.
~~~~~
Jess hadn’t slept well, tossing and turning most of the night, and wondering what Dan must think of her. Here she’d claimed to love Frank, and then she’d thrown herself at him like he’d never even existed. Except he obviously had. The baby she carried was proof enough of that.
Still, what man in his right mind could be interested in the attentions of a fat, bloated, pregnant woman? More to the point, how could she face him this morning?
Hard as she tried, Jess couldn’t think of a single instance in her entire life when she’d been this mortified. Nope. Last night definitely left any other embarrassing moments in the dust.
Weary, she got up and slipped into a pair of maternity jeans and another of her huge sweaters. No sense in putting it off. She couldn’t stay locked in her room all day, or for the rest of her life, which didn’t seem like a bad idea at the moment. No. She had to confront him, and hope he accepted her apology. First, however, she headed off to the bathroom to, among other pressing reasons, brush her teeth and hair.
“Oh.” Not bothering to knock, Jess pushed the hall door open, only to find Dan drying off from a shower – and utterly naked. For the second time in less than twelve hours, she was unable to move.
“Good morning,” Dan said, casually wrapping the towel low on his hips. “Did you sleep well?”
“Uh, yes,” she lied, gazing at the droplets of water glistening on his chest. And what a chest it was. Broad, as she’d known it would be, and lightly covered with dark, curly hair.
“What do you think about running in to Elias Brother’s for breakfast?” he asked. “I think we both deserve a day off from cooking.”
“Whatever you want is fine with me,” she stammered. What would it feel like to run her hands across his skin, to feel those soft hairs beneath her fingers?
“Good. I’ll finish up in the bedroom so you can do whatever you need to in here.” Rather than entering his room through the other door, he walked to where she stood, and kissed her nose. “I won’t be long.”
“All right,” Jess said almost inaudibly. If she reached out just a little....
CHAPTER 12
“And I just stood there like an idiot,” Jess groaned, covering her face with her hands. She and Emma had met at Ponderosa again, but even the steak tips she loved didn’t interest her, so she merely pushed the food around her plate, as she filled Emma in on the latest developments with Dan.
“He wasn’t embarrassed at all?” Emma asked. Jess looked at her then.
“Em, he acted like this sort of thing happened every day.” Lucky her if it had!
“Apparently it bothered you more than it did him.”
“I was mortified. First I make him feel like he has to kiss me, and then I stare at him like a pervert. It was too awful. I can’t imagine what he thinks of me. Probably that I’ve lost my mind. Or maybe, if I’m lucky, he’ll just put it down to crazy pregnancy hormones.”
“I seriously doubt that he thinks you’re crazy. For one thing, it sounds to me like he wanted to kiss you. And for another, what did he look like?”
“What?”
“In the bathroom. What did he look like?”
“Emma.”
“Well,” Emma defended herself, “he looks really nice in clothes. I just wondered if he looks as good out of them.”
“You have no idea,” Jess whispered, closing her eyes, and seeing him in vivid detail again. She’d relived that scene more times than she’d ever admit to. “His chest is magnificent.”
“That good, huh?” Emma grinned when Jess looked at her again, nodding her head vigorously. “I told you there could be worse things than staying married to him, didn’t I?”
“You did say that.”
“And I was right, wasn’t I?”
“There could be worse things,” she agreed looking down at her stomach with a grimace. “But why would Dan be interested in me?”
“Why wouldn’t
he be?”
“I look like a blimp.”
“Maybe from your perspective. To the rest of us, you look like a beautiful pregnant lady. Believe me, Dan is attracted to you.” Jess rolled her eyes. “He is. I’d bet money on it.”
~~~~~
“Hi, Emma, it’s Dan,” Dan said nervously, later that same day. He’d stayed at the office late so he could catch her at home. He wanted to be able to talk to her without the risk of his wife overhearing.
“Dan? What is it? The baby?” Emma asked quickly.
“No. No, as far as I know nothing is going on in that direction right now.” At least he hoped not. It was too early for that.
“What’s wrong? Is it Jess?”
“No. Why would you think that?”
“You’ve never called me before.”
“I guess I haven’t, have I?” he said, wincing. She was right. He never had called her, and he wished he’d remembered that before he scared her. “I’m sorry. And no, there’s nothing wrong.”
“Then what’s up?”
“I-” This was going to be harder than he thought. It was one thing to contemplate asking for advice, and quite another to actually do it. He vaguely recalled her suspicions over his marriage proposal.
“Dan?”
“I can’t think how to say this,” he mumbled, rolling a pencil between his thumb and forefinger.
“Try straight out,” Emma suggested.
“Okay.” Straight out. “I’m in love with Jess.” He had to take the receiver away from his ear when Emma let out an ear-piercing shriek.
“I knew it,” she exclaimed happily. “I told Jess you were.”
“What?” Dan demanded, sitting bolt upright in his chair. The pencil clattered on his desktop, and he picked it up again, clenching it in his fist this time.
“Well, I didn’t say you loved her, but I did tell her I thought you were attracted to her,” Emma amended.
“When?”
“This afternoon.”
“Why?”
“Dan, Jess is my best friend. What she tells me is private. She’d have my head if I say anything.”