Chapter VI
"_If the bowl had been stronger My tale had been longer_."
Steve entered Mitchell's office with the painful uprightness andprecise carriage of one who has lunched not wisely but rather toowell. His speech, too, was of ponderous brevity. The man of affairschided him with fatherly kindness.
"This won't do, my boy--this won't do. I like you, Thompson. I'msorry--I'm pained to see this. Don't go in for this sort of thing, oryour good fortune will prove a curse in disguise."
Steve hung his head, muttering something incoherent about not beingused to wine and that he'd soon get over it.
"Oh, young men _will_ be young men, I suppose," sighed Mitchelltolerantly. "Tell you what. Archibald's going for a spin over toEast New York. I'll just 'phone him to drop by on his way and take usalong. Fresh air'll do you good."
Steve assented, and fell to poring over the immense wall map of NewYork with preternatural gravity.
But Mitchell's benevolent plan was doomed to be frustrated. Hardly hadArchibald arrived and the employees been dismissed, when the sordid,busy, money-making city intruded in the person of Loring.
There were merry greetings all around. The artist was much pleased torenew his acquaintance with Thompson, to whom he had taken a fancy.Loring, it seemed, was an old friend of Archibald's and was promptlyinvited to make one of the party.
"Oh, I can't," demurred Loring. "And I hate to spoil sport, but I'vegot a good thing which must be put through to-night or not at all. Iran in to get Mitchell to handle it for me. I've got the opportunity,but not the wherewithal." He made the candid admission with adelightful smile.
"I fear that you are leaning on a mighty nearly broken reed," saidMitchell. "I'm all tied up in money matters this week. But spit itout, anyhow. I've got six or seven thousand loose. If it's more thanthat perhaps Archie can swing it--if it's a safe proposition."
"Safe as United States bonds, and good for thirty per cent, profit.Come back, Thompson!" Steve was making for the door, with apologies."You're not in the way a bit. Sit down, man! Your six thousand won'tbe a starter, Joe. I've got some four thousand myself, in red,red gold. All I have in the world--wish it was more." His blitheinsouciance was irresistibly charming.
"Get down to business, old fellow," said Archibald. "What's the lay?"
"This is all confidential, between gentlemen, you understand?" Allnodded. "You know young Post is in hiding? Well, I've been in touchwith him all along. He's tired of skulking and wants me to sell thathouse his mother left him, strictly on the Q.T. He's got a chance toslip away on a private yacht to-night. Said I could have all I couldget over thirty thousand. It's worth fifty, at least. I know whereI could get forty-five, but I dare not approach those people now,because they are unfriendly to Post and would make him trouble. Oncehe is safely away----" He waved his hand.
"That ought to be a good thing," said Archibald thoughtfully. "Itrents for six thousand a year, and values going up. I've a good mindto go into it for a permanent investment. Let's see--he'd want spotcash, wouldn't he?"
"Naturally. Cash on the nail. He could hardly afford to be identified,you know."
"Can't raise that much to-day," said the shipowner. "Maybe, byborrowing from my partner, I could get enough to pool with you andMitchell. What's your proposition? About cutting profits, I mean."
"I think I should have ten per cent. net, besides the proportionateearning of my four thousand--for giving you fellows the first chance.There's plenty would jump at it."
"That's fair enough," said Archibald. "Mr. Thompson, you will excuseus? Our trip will only be postponed. I'll have to fly around to rustleready money. I'll see Bowring first."
"Hold on," said Mitchell. "Why don't you let my friend in on this?He's got the scads, and he's a good fellow."
"Oh, he would have to go and see the place," objected Archibald, hiseye evidently on the main chance.
"No, he won't. We looked it over yesterday. I showed it to him becauseI used to live there. Don't be selfish, Archie. There's plenty ofchances for you to make money. Get your pail, Thompson!"
"We-ll," said Archibald grudgingly. "So long as it's not sure thatBowring can spare me the money, let him take over a third if he wantsto."
"Sure I do," grinned the prospective buyer, highly elated, "and muchobliged to you, too, Mr. Archibald.
"That's all right," said that person gruffly. "Now then, Loring, comeout of it! Time's flying. Where? When? How? Never saw an artist yet thatcould think on straight lines," he grumbled.
"All of you get your money, meet at Mitchell's rooms. I'll let Postknow and join you there later. We'll wait till dark, get a tried andacquitted notary of my acquaintance, slip around to Post's lair afterdark and do the deed. I'll stand a ripping dinner for the bunch outof my ten per cent. Put deed on record to-morrow morning. That'll givehim start enough. Is that all clear?"
"Clear as a bell. I'm off!" said Archibald.
"Archie's a good sort, but he does hate to let a dollar get by him."The artist laughed indulgently. "I say, Thompson, did you see how hestuck on letting you have a whack at it?"
"Where do you bank?" inquired Mitchell. Steve told him where his moneywas deposited. Mitchell shook his head. "I was hoping we would go thesame way, but I go uptown."
Ten minutes after they left the industrious bookkeeper returnedwith navvies and draymen, and removed the office furniture to partsunknown.
* * * * *
When the four financiers got together in Mitchell's room Steveproposed to continue his lessons in the fascinating game of bridge.
He drank freely and his game was the apotheosis of bumble-puppy.Archibald, his partner, was much irritated by his stupidity.
A bellboy came to the door. A gentleman in the parlor would like tosee Mr. Thompson.
Mr. Thompson looked at the card. "Mr. A.W. Wyatt," he announcedsneeringly. "You can tell Mr. A.W. Wyatt, if he wants to see me, hecan just naturally mosey himself up here."
"Not _the_ A.W. Wyatt--Anson Walworth Wyatt?" asked Loring. "I knowhim--I mean, I know him by sight."
"I believe it is," said Steve with surly indifference. "If you knowhim, you know an overbearing jabberwock. He's head devil of the pushthat bought the Copperbottom and I don't like his style even a littlebit. He seems to think I'm the dirt under his feet. I'll show him.I know what he wants, and that's the other fourth of my mine." Hethumped the table viciously. "He'll pay for all he gets from _me_,I'll tell you that."
Mr. Wyatt was ushered in; irreproachable, flawless, exquisite. ("It'shim!" breathed Loring.) He remained standing, hat in hand, fittedhis glass with vacuous care and surveyed the room with deliberatelyinsolent scrutiny. Thompson kept his seat, fairly prickling withantagonism. The others rose with exemplary good breeding.
"Aw!" said the newcomer, after an eloquent pause.
"Mistah--er--Townsend, cawn I have a few moments of quite pwivateconvehsation with you?"
"No, you cawnt!" retorted Thompson truculently. "Sit down, boys. Sitdown, I say! These gentlemen are my friends. Anything you got to say?If there is, say it. And my name's _Thompson_, if you please."
"Aw!--what an _extwemely_ wemahkable ahttitude!" Wyatt fixedhis monocle on the offending miner with bland and exasperatingcondescension. "Weally, you quite intewest me, y' know! I appwoachyou, quite civilly, y' know, with an offah decidedly to youahahdvahntage, Mistah--ah--Tomlinson, and you tweat it----"
"_Thompson_!! By Heavens, you say Tomlinson again and I'll pound yourface into shape!" roared the misnamed one, jumping up. Mitchell andLoring vainly tried to quiet him.
"Weally, I shall be obwiged to wefeh you to my lawyehs----" Wyattbegan.
"Refer _me_--you animated outrage--you libel! Turn me loose, youfellows! _I_ don't want to see _you_ or your durn lawyers! I knowwhat _you_ want, well enough. You want to bamboozle me into selling myinterest in the Copper-bottom for less than it's worth. Here's my lastword to you--Mr.--ah--White! If you want my fourth at forty thousand,to
-day, all right. It's worth more--it's paid from the grass-rootsdown. But that'll make me the round six figures, and that's enough._I_ can make money--_I_ know _my_ little way about," he boasted, withinsufferable complacency.
"Nobody left me _my_ pile! Put up or shut up!"
"Mr. Wyatt," said Mitchell, "pardon me, but may I suggest that youcall at a more favorable time?" He made, behind Thompson's back, themotion significant of an emptied glass.
"Aw! I see--I _see_! Thawnks awfully for the hint. Good-evening,gentlemen--and--ah--Mistah Tomkins!"
Thompson broke away, shaking his fist in Wyatt's face. "Say that againand I'll brain you--pawdon me, I should say, I'll smash your head in.Thompson's my name--T-h-o-m-p-s-o-n, _T h o m p s o n_! And you tradewith me, now or never!"
"You see, gentlemen?" Wyatt appealed. "Mistah--ah--Tawmson, I offahedyou twenty-five thousand on my own wesponsibility, as a--ah--businesspwoposition. My--ah--associawates in this undehtaking aw all fwiends,quite congenwial, y' know, and I felt suah they would sanction that. Ido not cyah to go futheh lengths without--ah--a confewence with them,as I believe that pwice quite ahmple, y' know. But if I could awwangefo' an option----"
"You pay me twenty thousand, cash, in this room, at eight o'clockto-night, and I'll give you an option for one week at forty thousand,"persisted the morose miner. "After that, the price goes up."
"Fifty pehcentum down on an option! This is uttehly unpwecedented, y'know. I must wemonstwate, weally!"
"It's all the option you'll get from me, you jackanapes." He snappedcontemptuous fingers under Wyatt's nose.
Wyatt buttoned his coat with dignity. "Weally, this pahsses allbounds!" he ejaculated. "Gentlemen, I accept this--ah--puhson's offeh.I cannot enduah such an associwate. You ah all witnesses. May I ahskyou-ah names, and may I wequest youah pwesence to-night, both toensuah the--ar--fulfillment of the vehbal contwact which you haveheahd, and to pwevent the wepetition of this scandalous scene?" Heopened the door. "Aw wevoah, gentlemen!" By this time he was in theelevator. From this coign of vantage he sent a Parthian shaft.
"Till eight o'clock, Mistah--ah--Tomkinson!"
The three held the raging Thompson with some mutual dishevelment. Theysoothed him with flattery, stayed him with flagons, for he yearned forblood with a great yearning.
"Listen to your friends, boy," urged Mitchell. "Take his money, anddon't do anything you'll be sorry for. Make out your papers and pay noattention to what he says. Come, brace up! It'll be time for dinnerin a jiffy. Promise us not to drink any more, and not to make anytrouble, or we'll 'phone him not to come."
Steve allowed himself to be pacified at last, but he regarded hismitigators with a malignant eye.
"Here's what I owe you on bridge, Mitchell--twenty-three dollars," hesaid sullenly. "Archibald can settle with Loring. _I_ don't want nodinner--I'm going to sleep."
"Oh, come on now, that's a good fellow," purred Mitchell, pickingup the two bills and the coins. "Say, old man--you haven't turnedcounterfeiter, have you?" he said good-naturedly. "This one's N.G."
Steve took it clumsily. "It's no such thing," he blurted. "Good asgold. Take it or leave it. I don't care."
"Oh, very well," said Mitchell, humoring him. Then he reflected. Theindications were that their projected _coup_ might fail if Steve'ssurly humor kept up. Why not improve the shining hour? The coin wasobviously bad.
"I'll take it before it gets you into trouble," he insinuated.
Steve lurched to his feet, thrusting an undecorative face over thetable. "You think' it's bad?" he queried darkly. "You think I'm afool?" He flung a packet of bills on the table. "Cover that, if youdare," he said. "There's the money for the Post place--ten thousanddollars. It says that's a good dollar. Put up or shut up!"
"You'll lose your money!" warned Mitchell. "Then you'll say I tookadvantage of you."
"_I_ know what _you_ think," said Steve shrewdly. "_You_ thinkI'm drunk, but I'm not. _I_ know a good thing when I see it. Don'tyou--don't you lose no sleep about _me_. I'm--I'm all right, you bet!Now what'll you do or take water?" he fleered.
Surreptitiously Loring had tried the coin with his penknife duringthis controversy. The metal was quite soft--the knife left a greatscar, which he flashed at Mitchell.
"Well--if you insist," said Mitchell reluctantly. He counted out tenone-thousand-dollar bills. "Who'll be the judge?"
"Anybody. Archie. I've got you skinned a mile anyway."
"I am sorry, Mr. Thompson," said Archibald, "but this dollar seems tobe pewter, or something of that general description. Aw, give him backhis money, Mitchell--he's drinking.
"I won't!" said Mitchell stubbornly. "He forced me into it. Hewouldn't have given it back to me if I'd lost."
"Sure I wouldn't," assented Steve. "I'm no boy. _I_ play for keeps,me. Don't be so fast, _if_ you please. This money ain't won yet. Cutinto that dollar! I was from Missouri before ever I saw Montana."
"Cut it, Loring," said Mitchell. "Show him!"
Loring scratched it with the penknife point. "You see? soft ascheese--rotten," he said. And then the knife struck something hard.A chill crept over him. Stupefied, he scraped the base metal back,revealing a portion of _an irrefutably good dollar._
The dismayed rascals looked up. In Thompson's hand a large,businesslike gun wavered portentously from one head to the other.
"Go on!" he admonished. His tone was not particularly pleasant. "Peelher off! Yah! You puling infants! You cheap, trading-stamp crooks!"He raked off the money. "Be tran-tranquil! You doddering idiots, I'dshoot your heads off for two bits I Try to rob a countryman, will you?Why, gentle shepherds all, I've been on to such curves as yours eversince Hec was a pup! You and your scout Loring and your Bickfordand your Post!" he scoffed. "Don't open your heads. Bah! Here, youskunks!" He threw an ostentatiously bad dollar on the table. "Takethat, and break even if you can. That patronizing half-baked tailor'sdummy that called me out of my name will be back bimeby, with hispockets full. I'd like to see him taken down a peg, but I dassentspoil the sale of my mine. Tell him I'm in bed, full, but'll be out inan hour or so. He'll come again to buy me out. Hates me like poison,he does. If you can get him to bite, go it! But I doubt if you'll findeven that saphead as rank as you three wise guys. Anyway, I don't wantto see him while I feel this way. My head aches, and I suppose there'ssome sort of law against shooting the likes of him--or you. I'mleavin' for another hotel, right now. Don't you fellows bother meif you value your hides. If you can skin, that puppy, why, sic 'em,Towse! and the devil take the hindmost! Oh, you Smart Alecks!"
He backed out with a traditional wiggle of his fingers.
It is to be regretted that the stringent regulations of the postalauthorities will not permit us any report of the heart-to-heart talkthat followed his departure, other than the baldest summary. It wasmarked by earnestness, sincerity, even by some petulance, interspersedwith frank and spirited repartee. Mutual recrimination resulted.
Subdued and chastened, Mr. Mitchell was reduced to the ranks; Loring,by virtue of his own and Mitchell's vote, replacing him. Archibald'spreference was for a third person still--namely, himself--and heacquiesced with ill grace.
They had but little over ten thousand dollars remaining for the returnmatch; and this, as Loring pointed out with just indignation, wouldonly put them even. They knew that Wyatt would have at least twicethat much with him. So they scurried forth and made such good use ofthe scant time left them, by borrowing, by squeezing both Bickford andthe hard-working bookkeeper, and by resource to certain nest-eggslaid by for case of extreme urgency (known among themselves as "fixmoney"), they scraped together some six thousand more. The "ripping"dinner went untasted. They were hardened, but human.
All ravages of carking care were smoothed away, and they were disposedin luxuriant and contented ease when Wyatt came.
"Aw, gentlemen, I am punctual, you see!" he announced gayly. "Itis weally vewy kind of you to be so obliging--I'm suah. Isthe--ah--mining puhson in?"
Mr. Loring, speaking for the tr
io, affably regretted that their youngfriend was not, in fact, at his best during Mr. Wyatt's previous call.They had remonstrated with him for his injurious conduct. At presenthe was sleeping off the effects of his slight exhilaration: theythought it would not be at all judicious to disturb him: they feltsure that, on awakening, he would prove amenable to reason. Meanwhile,the night was young; if Mr. Wyatt cared to join them in a friendlyrubber they would be delighted.
"Chawmed, I'm suah!" said Wyatt. "I do not desiah any contwovewsy withthat vewy wuffianly puhson while he is--ah--wuffled. So I shall waitand shall be happy to join you."
The score was close; it was only through ingenious manipulation bytheir opponents that Wyatt and his partner were forced to win a smallsum.
"Weally, gentlemen," drawled Wyatt, looking at his watch, "I shall befowced to leave you. I have an engagement at eleven, and I weally feahouah Mr. Townshend will be, as I might say, _hors de combat_ fohthe night. I have to thawnk you fow a vewy agweeable evening,nevahtheless."
He was carelessly sweeping the money into his pocket when Mitchell,his partner, checked him.
"I beg your pardon, but is that not a bad dollar?" he said.
"Oh, no mattah--no consequence at all, I assuah you," said Wyattliberally. He would have pocketed the piece, but Loring, who had paidit, gave him another, and flung the slighted coin over to Mitchell.
"If you're so set on this dollar being bad," he said angrily, "I'llbet you what you dare it's not bad."
"Done with you for twenty!" Mitchell covered it promptly.
Loring drew out a handful of bills. "Here you are. Any one else wantany of this?" he inquired captiously.
Archibald shook his head and laughed. Wyatt screwed his monocle intohis eye, regarded both sides of the coin attentively, and laid itdown.
"Quite bad, I assuah you," he said. "I should pwonounce it about thewohst specimen extahnt."
"Maybe you'd like to bet on it?" said Loring, flaunting the big bills.
Wyatt was evidently nettled. "Weally, you aw wong--I assuah you," hesaid stiffly.
"If you aw--pawdon me--quite able to lose that moneywithout--ah--inconvenience I am weady to covah it, at least, as fah aswhat I have with me goes."
"Done!" said Loring. This was not so bad, after all.
"How much?... Aw! Seventeen thousand. Exactly. The bet is made,gentlemen. I--ah--propose that we wing the bell foh the pwopwietahand, shahl we say, the clahk, to act as judge and stakeholdeh."
"That will be satisfactory," said Loring. "Allow me, in turn, to makea suggestion, Mr. Wyatt. Put the money in your billbook, hand it tothe stakeholder, and let him give it, unopened, to the winner. Ofcourse, you will first take out your other money. There is no need forthem to know that more than a trivial sum is at stake. We do not wantto court unpleasant notoriety."
"Quite twue! An excellent suggestion," said Wyatt gravely. Heproceeded to put it in effect.
The summoned dignitaries arrived, the situation was explained, andWyatt, handing the money to the proprietor and the questionable dollarto the clerk, requested judgment.
The clerk looked at the coin, rubbed it, rang it. It gave out a dulland leaden sound.
"Bad, beyond a doubt," he said.
"Try it with your knife," said Loring confidently.
The clerk complied. By mischance he bore on too hard. The knife wentthrough to the table.
A sound of mirth swept to them. With horror frozen on their faces,the three rascals were aware of Thompson, leaning in thedoorway--unmistakably sober, given up to reprehensible levity, holdingout a bright tin pail with an expectant air.
Let us give even the devil his due. For Mitchell laughed.
THE END
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