CHAPTER XLV
THE PATTERNE LADIES: MR. DALE: LADY BUSSHE AND LADY CULMER: WITH MRS.MOUNTSTUART JENKINSON
Lady Busshe and Lady Culmer entered spying to right and left. At thesight of Mr. Dale in the room Lady Busshe murmured to her friend:"Confirmation!"
Lady Culmer murmured: "Corney is quite reliable."
"The man is his own best tonic."
"He is invaluable for the country."
Miss Eleanor and Miss Isabel greeted them.
The amiability of the Patterne ladies combined with their total eclipsebehind their illustrious nephew invited enterprising women of the worldto take liberties, and they were not backward.
Lady Busshe said: "Well? the news! we have the outlines. Don't beastonished: we know the points: we have heard the gun. I could havetold you as much yesterday. I saw it. And I guessed it the day before.Oh, I do believe in fatalities now. Lady Culmer and I agree to takethat view: it is the simplest. Well, and are you satisfied, my dears?"
The ladies grimaced interrogatively: "With what?"
"With it? with all! with her! with him!"
"Our Willoughby?"
"Can it be possible that they require a dose of Corney?" Lady Bussheremarked to Lady Culmer.
"They play discretion to perfection," said Lady Culmer. "But, my dears,we are in the secret."
"How did she behave?" whispered Lady Busshe. "No high flights andflutters, I do hope. She was well-connected, they say; though I don'tcomprehend what they mean by a line of scholars--one thinks of a row ofpinafores: and she was pretty."
"That is well enough at the start. It never will stand against brains.He had the two in the house to contrast them, and . . . the result! Ayoung woman with brains--in a house--beats all your beauties. LadyCulmer and I have determined on that view. He thought her a delightfulpartner for a dance, and found her rather tiresome at the end of thegallopade. I saw it yesterday, clear as daylight. She did notunderstand him, and he did understand her. That will be our report."
"She is young: she will learn," said the ladies uneasily, but in totalignorance of her meaning.
"And you are charitable, and always were. I remember you had a goodword for that girl Durham."
Lady Busshe crossed the room to Mr. Dale, who was turning over leavesof a grand book of the heraldic devices of our great Families.
"Study it," she said, "study it, my dear Mr. Dale; you are in it, byright of possessing a clever and accomplished daughter. At page 300you will find the Patterne crest. And mark me, she will drag you intothe peerage before she has done--relatively, you know. Sir Willoughbyand wife will not be contented to sit down and manage the estates. Hasnot Laetitia immense ambition? And very creditable, I say."
Mr. Dale tried to protest something. He shut the book, examining thebinding, flapped the cover with a finger, hoped her ladyship was ingood health, alluded to his own and the strangeness of the bird out ofthe cage.
"You will probably take up your residence here, in a larger andhandsomer cage. Mr. Dale."
He shook his head. "Do I apprehend . . ." he said.
"I know," said she.
"Dear me, can it be?"
Mr. Dale gazed upward, with the feelings of one awakened late to see aworld alive in broad daylight.
Lady Busshe dropped her voice. She took the liberty permitted to herwith an inferior in station, while treating him to a tone offamiliarity in acknowledgment of his expected rise; which is highbreeding, or the exact measurement of social dues.
"Laetitia will be happy, you may be sure. I love to see a long andfaithful attachment rewarded--love it! Her tale is the triumph ofpatience. Far above Grizzel! No woman will be ashamed of pointing toLady Patterne. You are uncertain? You are in doubt? Let me hear--as lowas you like. But there is no doubt of the new shifting of thescene?--no doubt of the proposal? Dear Mr. Dale! a very little louder.You are here because--? of course you wish to see Sir Willoughby. She?I did not catch you quite. She? . . . it seems, you say . . . ?"
Lady Culmer said to the Patterne ladies:--
"You must have had a distressing time. These affairs always mount up toa climax, unless people are very well bred. We saw it coming.Naturally we did not expect such a transformation of brides: who could?If I had laid myself down on my back to think, I should have had it. Iam unerring when I set to speculating on my back. One is cooler: ideascome; they have not to be forced. That is why I am brighter on a dullwinter afternoon, on the sofa, beside my tea-service, than at any otherseason. However, your trouble is over. When did the Middletons leave?"
"The Middletons leave?" said the ladies.
"Dr. Middleton and his daughter."
"They have not left us."
"The Middletons are here?"
"They are here, yes. Why should they have left Patterne?"
"Why?"
"Yes. They are likely to stay some days longer."
"Goodness!"
"There is no ground for any report to the contrary, Lady Culmer."
"No ground!"
Lady Culmer called out to Lady Busshe.
A cry came back from that startled dame.
"She has refused him!"
"Who?"
"She has."
"She?--Sir Willoughby?"
"Refused!--declines the honour."
"Oh, never! No, that carries the incredible beyond romance. But is heperfectly at . . ."
"Quite, it seems. And she was asked in due form and refused."
"No, and no again!"
"My dear, I have it from Mr. Dale."
"Mr. Dale, what can be the signification of her conduct?"
"Indeed, Lady Culmer," said Mr. Dale, not unpleasantly agitated by theinterest he excited, in spite of his astonishment at a publicdiscussion of the matter in this house, "I am in the dark. Her fathershould know, but I do not. Her door is locked to me; I have not seenher. I am absolutely in the dark. I am a recluse. I have forgotten theways of the world. I should have supposed her father would first havebeen addressed."
"Tut-tut. Modern gentlemen are not so formal; they are creatures ofimpulse and take a pride in it. He spoke. We settle that. But where didyou get this tale of a refusal?"
"I have it from Dr. Middleton."
"From Dr. Middleton?" shouted Lady Busshe.
"The Middletons are here," said Lady Culmer.
"What whirl are we in?" Lady Busshe got up, ran two or three steps andseated herself in another chair. "Oh! do let us proceed upon system. Ifnot we shall presently be rageing; we shall be dangerous. TheMiddletons are here, and Dr. Middleton himself communicates to Mr. Dalethat Laetitia Dale has refused the hand of Sir Willoughby, who isostensibly engaged to his own daughter! And pray, Mr. Dale, how didDr. Middleton speak of it? Compose yourself; there is no violent hurry,though our sympathy with you and our interest in all the parties doesperhaps agitate us a little. Quite at your leisure--speak!"
"Madam . . . Lady Busshe." Mr. Dale gulped a ball in his throat. "I seeno reason why I should not speak. I do not see how I can have beendeluded. The Miss Patternes heard him. Dr. Middleton began upon it, notI. I was unaware, when I came, that it was a refusal. I had beeninformed that there was a proposal. My authority for the tale waspositive. The object of my visit was to assure myself of the integrityof my daughter's conduct. She had always the highest sense of honour.But passion is known to mislead, and there was this most strangereport. I feared that our humblest apologies were due to Dr. Middletonand his daughter. I know the charm Laetitia can exercise. Madam, in theplainest language, without a possibility of my misapprehending him, Dr.Middleton spoke of himself as the advocate of the suitor for mydaughter's hand. I have a poor head. I supposed at once an amicablerupture between Sir Willoughby and Miss Middleton, or that the versionwhich had reached me of their engagement was not strictly accurate. Myhead is weak. Dr. Middleton's language is trying to a head like mine;but I can speak positively on the essential points: he spoke of himselfas ready to be the impassioned advocate of the suitor for my daughter'
shand. Those were his words. I understood him to entreat me to intercedewith her. Nay, the name was mentioned. There was no concealment. I amcertain there could not be a misapprehension. And my feelings weretouched by his anxiety for Sir Willoughby's happiness. I attributed itto a sentiment upon which I need not dwell. Impassioned advocate, hesaid."
"We are in a perfect maelstrom!" cried Lady Busshe, turning toeverybody.
"It is a complete hurricane!" cried Lady Culmer.
A light broke over the faces of the Patterne ladies. They exchanged itwith one another.
They had been so shocked as to be almost offended by Lady Busshe, buttheir natural gentleness and habitual submission rendered them unequalto the task of checking her.
"Is it not," said Miss Eleanor, "a misunderstanding that a change ofnames will rectify?"
"This is by no means the first occasion," said Miss Isabel, "thatWilloughby has pleaded for his cousin Vernon."
"We deplore extremely the painful error into which Mr. Dale hasfallen."
"It springs, we now perceive, from an entire misapprehension of Dr.Middleton."
"Vernon was in his mind. It was clear to us."
"Impossible that it could have been Willoughby!"
"You see the impossibility, the error!"
"And the Middletons here!" said Lady Busshe. "Oh! if we leaveunilluminated we shall be the laughing-stock of the county. Mr. Dale,please, wake up. Do you see? You may have been mistaken."
"Lady Busshe," he woke up; "I may have mistaken Dr. Middleton; he has alanguage that I can compare only to a review-day of the field forces.But I have the story on authority that I cannot question: it isconfirmed by my daughter's unexampled behaviour. And if I live throughthis day I shall look about me as a ghost to-morrow."
"Dear Mr. Dale!" said the Patterne ladies, compassionately. Lady Busshemurmured to them: "You know the two did not agree; they did not get on:I saw it; I predicted it."
"She will understand him in time," said they.
"Never. And my belief is, they have parted by consent, and Letty Dalewins the day at last. Yes, now I do believe it."
The ladies maintained a decided negative, but they knew too much not tofeel perplexed, and they betrayed it, though they said: "Dear LadyBusshe! is it credible, in decency?"
"Dear Mrs. Mountstuart!" Lady Busshe invoked her great rival appearingamong them: "You come most opportunely; we are in a state ofinextricable confusion: we are bordering on frenzy. You, and none butyou, can help us. You know, you always know; we hang on you. Is thereany truth in it? a particle?"
Mrs. Mountstuart seated herself regally "Ah, Mr. Dale!" she said,inclining to him. "Yes, dear Lady Busshe, there is a particle."
"Now, do not roast us. You can; you have the art. I have the wholestory. That is, I have a part. I mean, I have the outlines, I cannot bedeceived, but you can fill them in, I know you can. I saw it yesterday.Now, tell us, tell us. It must be quite true or utterly false. Which isit?"
"Be precise."
"His fatality! you called her. Yes, I was sceptical. But here we haveit all come round again, and if the tale is true, I shall own youinfallible. Has he?--and she?"
"Both."
"And the Middletons here? They have not gone; they keep the field. Andmore astounding, she refuses him. And to add to it, Dr. Middletonintercedes with Mr. Dale for Sir Willoughby."
"Dr. Middleton intercedes!" This was rather astonishing to Mrs.Mountstuart.
"For Vernon," Miss Eleanor emphasized.
"For Vernon Whitford, his cousin." said Miss Isabel, still moreemphatically.
"Who," said Mrs. Mountstuart, with a sovereign lift and turn of herhead, "speaks of a refusal?"
"I have it from Mr. Dale," said Lady Busshe.
"I had it, I thought, distinctly from Dr. Middleton," said Mr. Dale.
"That Willoughby proposed to Laetitia for his cousin Vernon, DoctorMiddleton meant," said Miss Eleanor.
Her sister followed: "Hence this really ridiculous misconception!--sad,indeed," she added, for balm to Mr. Dale.
"Willoughby was Vernon's proxy. His cousin, if not his first, is everthe second thought with him."
"But can we continue . . . ?"
"Such a discussion!"
Mrs. Mountstuart gave them a judicial hearing. They were regarded inthe county as the most indulgent of nonentities, and she as little asLady Busshe was restrained from the burning topic in their presence.She pronounced:
"Each party is right, and each is wrong."
A dry: "I shall shriek!" came from Lady Busshe.
"Cruel!" groaned Lady Culmer.
"Mixed, you are all wrong. Disentangled, you are each of you right. SirWilloughby does think of his cousin Vernon; he is anxious to establishhim; he is the author of a proposal to that effect."
"We know it!" the Patterne ladies exclaimed. "And Laetitia rejectedpoor Vernon once more!"
"Who spoke of Miss Dale's rejection of Mr. Whitford?"
"Is he not rejected?" Lady Culmer inquired.
"It is in debate, and at this moment being decided."
"Oh! do he seated, Mr. Dale," Lady Busshe implored him, rising tothrust him back to his chair if necessary. "Any dislocation, and we arethrown out again! We must hold together if this riddle is ever to beread. Then, dear Mrs. Mountstuart, we are to say that there is-no truthin the other story?"
"You are to say nothing of the sort, dear Lady Busshe."
"Be merciful! And what of the fatality?"
"As positive as the Pole to the needle."
"She has not refused him?"
"Ask your own sagacity."
"Accepted?"
"Wait."
"And all the world's ahead of me! Now, Mrs. Mountstuart, you areoracle. Riddles, if you like, only speak. If we can't have corn, why,give us husks."
"Is any one of us able to anticipate events, Lady Busshe?"
"Yes, I believe that you are. I bow to you. I do sincerely. So it'sanother person for Mr. Whitford? You nod. And it is our Laetitia forSir Willoughby? You smile. You would not deceive me? A very little,and I run about crazed and howl at your doors. And Dr. Middleton ismade to play blind man in the midst? And the other person is--now I seeday! An amicable rupture, and a smooth new arrangement. She has money;she was never the match for our hero; never; I saw it yesterday, andbefore, often; and so he hands her over--tuthe-rum-tum-tum,tuthe-rum-tum-tum," Lady Busshe struck a quick march on her knee. "Nowisn't that clever guessing? The shadow of a clue for me. And because Iknow human nature. One peep, and I see the combination in a minute. Sohe keeps the money in the family, becomes a benefactor to his cousin bygetting rid of the girl, and succumbs to his fatality. Rather a pity helet it ebb and flow so long. Time counts the tides, you know. But itimproves the story. I defy any other county in the kingdom to produceone fresh and living to equal it. Let me tell you I suspected Mr.Whitford, and I hinted it yesterday."
"Did you indeed!" said Mrs. Mountstuart, humouring her excessiveacuteness.
"I really did. There is that dear good man on his feet again. And looksagitated again."
Mr. Dale had been compelled both by the lady's voice and his interestin the subject to listen. He had listened more than enough; he wasexceedingly nervous. He held on by his chair, afraid to quit hismoorings, and "Manners!" he said to himself unconsciously aloud, as hecogitated on the libertine way with which these chartered great ladiesof the district discussed his daughter. He was heard and unnoticed. Thesupposition, if any, would have been that he was admonishing himself.At this juncture Sir Willoughby entered the drawing-room by the gardenwindow, and simultaneously Dr. Middleton by the door.