Chapter 4 – The Man with the Lion’s Mane
After three days of heated arguments and begging pleads, nobody can persuade Skye that what she plans is a foolhardy venture that will get her killed. She has her mind set. She is determined to start her own House, and by the gods, she will do it.
“This is the right thing to do,” Skye says. She is sitting on my bed. Albatross is curled up asleep on her lap. A candle burns on my desk. It’s dark and cold and neither of us can sleep.
I’m not sure what to feel about her departure. I admire her for her fierce independence, but I feel she isn’t mature enough to start her own House and I don’t want to upset Brian by publicly stating I’m on Skye’s side.
I’m fairly sure I have a major crush on him now. I can’t get him out of my head. His face is imprinted on my brain. He’s the last thing I think about when I drift off to sleep, and the first thing that skips across my mind when I wake up. I even dream about him.
“Do you hate it here that much?” I ask her.
“I don’t hate it here at all. I love it here and I love my family. But I have a real desire to start my own House and to do that, I have to leave. They don’t seem to understand that and I’m sick of them going on at me.”
“Your parents love you and don’t want you to do anything stupid.”
“You all think I’m some ditzy fool that rambles on all the time about nothing and that’s just not true. I do ramble, but it’s because I have so many things to say and I have to tell them quickly before I forget them. That has nothing to do with my desire to start the House of Skye.” She laughs. “The House of Skye; it sounds so magical, like it was always meant to be. I can just picture it now.”
As she wanders off into her own dream world, my own mind begins to conjure mildly treacherous thoughts. What if I leave with Skye? We can start our own House together. What an adventure it will be! We’ll have to go on a long journey to find somewhere suitable to start off in, and there will be hardships and danger but it could be wonderful.
“So are you coming with me or not?” Skye blurts out.
I can only stare at her. It’s like she’s reading my thoughts.
“What?” I gasp.
“You heard me. Did you really think I’d run off and not at least invite you? Of course, you don’t have to say yes or anything, but just think of the adventure! You told me yourself you didn’t want to be mayor of this overcrowded and annoying House.”
My heart pleads with my head to scream out yes. I could pack my things and run off with Skye this very instant and never look back. The temptation is so consuming it begins to tear me up inside. All I have to do is say yes.
Instead I say, “No, I can’t.”
“You can! You can!” Skye insists. “There’s nothing stopping you from coming with me. Well, I suppose your parents could tie you up or something but then I’d untie you.”
I take a huge breath to clear my lungs and say, “No matter what my feelings are, I have a responsibility. I’m going to be mayor one day.”
“Your father could live a hundred years. Do you really want to hang around for the next sixty odd years, just waiting? That’s not a life. That’s just waiting for your father to die.”
I’ve never seen it, my future life, like this before. While it is very unlikely that Father will live to a hundred, he could survive well into his eighties. What would I do in the meantime?
Skye grins. “I’ve got you thinking! I’ll give you some time. It’s not as if I’m going any day soon. I’ve still got so much stuff to prepare! It’s going to be quite a task.”
“I’ve already said no,” I snap.
“But you’re not saying it like you mean it.”
I don’t answer her because she’s right. I can’t abandon the House of Casper and run off and start a House with Skye. It would be irresponsible and selfish and I’m not that type of person. Yet I could do it if I really wanted to
When Skye leaves to go to her own quarters, I try to get my head around her offer. Should I stay? The unavoidable fact is I am going to be mayor, no matter when that might be. I have no choice. I have to stay. But the mere fact that I don’t have a choice makes me want to rebel.
But what about Brian?
If I leave, I’ll never see Brian again. I’m not sure I could handle that. The mere thought of it fills me with dread.
I dream of Brian again that night, dreams I have never dreamt before. Adult dreams so intense they seem real, though they do bring up something I’m not expecting. The only person I can think of to talk to about it with is my Father.
“I woke up and...” I feel so embarrassed.
“Can it wait?” says Father. He sounds impatient. He sits at the desk in his study working on the winter forecasts. I don’t really understand all the numbers and tables and stuff but Father is a master when it comes to math.
I figure I should just blurt it out and hope nothing else is revealed. My doubts over whether to or not to leave with Skye are my secret for now.
I start. “Well, the thing is...I had this dream and when I woke up...my, erm, thing was bigger than it was and I...did something with it. I didn’t want to, not at first, but...it felt really good and...look, I better leave you to your work and...”
“Sit down,” says Father. He frowns as he says, “We need to have a talk.”
Father explains everything I need to know. He describes how a baby is conceived and the different stages of puberty. His speech then becomes intricately anatomical, without leaving out anything. He’d told me about getting hairs in odd places years ago, but this…
“It would’ve been nice to know all this before,” I mutter.
“Experiencing something for yourself is a lot better than being told something and not really believing it.”
I realize he does have a point.
“Skye’s parents are both men,” I say, working this out carefully in my head. “How were she and Brian born?”
“A surrogate was chosen,” says Father. At my blank look he continues, “Skye’s blood father mated with a surrogate and she had the baby and gave it to him and his husband to raise as their own. It was the same with Brian.”
I can’t believe it has never occurred to me until now. If I were to marry Brian, we could have children. We only needed a surrogate.
The sudden clanking of a pan makes Father’s face darken. He stands up, practically ignoring me, and walks towards the door. It is only at the very last second that he notices I’m still with him, waiting. I have seen this look on my father’s face three times before. Then, as now, it has happened when someone comes knocking at the door. It is fear.
“Get your mother to take you to Lottie Grange-Casper’s house,” Father orders. “There will be no more delays in meeting the betrothal bids.”
“Who’s at the front entrance?” I ask. The clanking pan is the doorbell visitors or traders use to signal their arrival. “You seem to know.”
“Just do as you’re told,” he orders, before walking away.
I want to tell him that I’m an adult now and he can’t tell me what to do any more. But I respect him too much to start an argument over something so petty. If he wants to tell me what is wrong, he will. Still, I am curious. If something is upsetting Father this much, I need to know what it is.
I peek out of the door of the study and creep across to the front doors. Father is walking down the stairs. Uncle Rooster is waiting for him at the bottom. They start talking animatedly, and Rooster even laughs at one point. Father doesn’t laugh.
“I’m all packed and we’re ready to go!” a voice announces loudly behind me. I turn around, startled, and my heart starts to palpitate. It’s Skye.
“Don’t sneak up on me like that!” I admonish her. I keep my eyes firmly on Father and Uncle Rooster as they vanish through the doors into the bridge that leads across the river.
“I’m good at sneaking up on people,” says Skye proudly. “Why are you watching th
e mayor and his brother? Are you spying on them?”
“Every couple of years someone knocks at the door and it makes Father scared,” I explain hurriedly. “Uncle Rooster and he go outside to meet whoever it is and then come back an hour later. I want to know who it is they keep talking to, and why it makes him so nervous.”
“It’s elder business. We should not be...hmm, now you’ve made me curious. Maybe they’re doing secret dealings with some shady trader? Or what if they’re making plans to marry you off to some disease-ridden girl with three arms from another House? That’s been known to happen.”
“So let’s follow them.”
Skye hesitates for what seems an eternity. Finally, she just nods her head, giggles, and yanks on my arm. Anyone would think this is her idea.
There are a dozen or more entrances to The Glass Palace. The one I used to get back in after my Journey is the one most used by the families. There is also a larger entrance that visitors use. The one that we’re heading to is the visitor’s entrance, which you had to cross a bridge over a gushing river to get to. The river occasionally floods because of where it is situated. There is an upside to the floods, though; we are able to catch plenty of rats to save as food for the winter.
I can hear Albatross snuffling behind me.
“Can’t you shut him up?” I whisper as we cross the bridge. “Father will hear him and then our cover will be blown!”
“I’ll ask him,” she says. As by a miracle, the pig quiets down immediately.
The reception outpost is in a smaller building to which the bridge is connected. At the moment, it isn’t occupied. The blinds have been pulled back. This is odd. The outpost has to have someone manning it all times.
Skye is looking down a short flight of stairs where the visitor entrance is located. The doors are open, but around this area all glass doors and walls have been boarded up with planks of wood and layers of thick plastic. While there hasn’t been a raid in a year, we find it prudent to keep up our defense.
Father and Rooster are in conversation with a small man dressed in various rags and furs. His hood is made from a yellow, long, shaggy fur, which Skye whispers into my ear is from something called a lion. It’s not his fur, though, that attracts my attention; it’s the huge rucksack strapped to his back. It’s so big you could fit a large dog in there. I’m surprised he can even move about properly without toppling over.
“Have you seen him before?” I ask quietly. I can’t see his face clearly from way over here, but I do make out a fairly long nose, like the beak of a bird.
Skye muses for a second. “There’s this book in the library that I read once about this hunchback in some giant church. He reminds me somewhat of him. He doesn’t look scary though.”
“If he’s not scary, then why does father look frightened every time he turns up?”
The man turns towards our direction, and I quickly hide behind the wall. I saw his face quite clearly. He is old and wrinkled, and I’m positive that he smiled at me.
After a few seconds, we resume our watch. The small man shakes hands with Father, ignores Rooster, and shuffles back outside into sleeting rain. He pulls the lion’s mane hood over his head and slowly, struggling with the burden on his back, walks away.
I pull Skye back and we make a run for it back across the bridge. By the time Father and Rooster return, we are just about to go and look for Mother. I’m sure he doesn’t suspect a thing, although we’re suspiciously out of breath.
Skye and I part ways at her quarters so she can pick up her bags. She would have preferred to sneak out and avoid the commotion, but her parents have persuaded her to host a leaving party. We can’t really afford another feast so soon after my own, but it is a big occasion after all. Not many of the villagers think she can accomplish such a thing. We know she’ll be straight back to The Glass Palace within a month, pretending like nothing had happened.
I realize then that I’ve already decided what I’m going to do. I just need to let Skye in on my decision.
“So are you going to go and pack or not?” Skye asks, shoving her clothes haphazardly into her backpack. “If you’re not packed when I decide to leave, then I’ll go without you.”
I look her straight in the eye and say, “I’m not going with you.”
“Of course you are,” she says with a laugh. “You don’t want to be mayor any more than I want to fall off a cliff. You’re coming with me and you know it.”
She continues to pack as I watch her in silence. I wonder why she’d told me she had packed already but clearly she had not even begun. The answer is obvious, really; she wants to give me more time to change my mind. I want to change my mind more than anything in the world. Only one thing is holding me back, and that thing is Brian. Brian has changed everything. As much as I want to leave, I know I couldn’t, not when there is still a chance.
Should I tell her that Brian is the reason I’m staying? Perhaps it’s a bad idea. I don’t want Skye to think I’m abandoning her for someone else.
“I wonder what food they’re putting out for my leaving feast,” Skye ponders as she buckles up her bag. “I know we can’t spare much but I’m expecting something decent. After all, this place will be a lot more tedious without me.”
“This place will be as dull as a rainy day without you,” I state with all my heart. “I’ll miss you.”
“They’ll be time for goodbyes later,” says Skye, wiping a tear from her eye. “I know you’re not coming. I think I understand.”
“This is where I have to be.”
She pulls me into a hug and soon enough we’re both crying. I’ll miss her so much; her playfulness, her eccentricity and her ramblings. She’s right. This place will be soul crushingly boring without her in it.
I find Mother in the library. This is where she works part time, sometimes as a librarian, other times as a teacher. Today she is a teacher. Her students appear to be Milo and his twin-sister Megan. The two small children are reading the book I gifted him while Mother watches over their shoulders, her face curious.
Our library contains thousands of books, either stolen from undamaged stock taken from The Glass Palace itself or scavenged from the outside. Father has stated that reading is almost as important as food and shelter. I agree with him.
“I see you like my book then.” I casually sit down by the reading table. Megan looks at me shyly.
“It’s the best thing I’ve ever read!” Milo declares vociferously. “It’s even better than that book with the chocolate factory!”
“What’s it about?” I ask.
“There are all these men and ladies and they wear strange costumes and they have magical powers which they use to help people. It’s not like normal books, though, it’s got pictures as well as words!”
Megan nods her agreement. His enthusiasm makes me proud. I’m glad I gave him such an intriguing gift.
“It’s a bit childish if you ask me,” Mother remarks.
“They are children,” I remind her.
“And some of the people in them look like the gods too, which is a little scary. Why would someone do that?”
Mother is worrying for nothing as usual. Drawing the gods does not get you in trouble. There is a painting of the gods in my mother’s home, and that hasn’t been smashed to pieces in an act of divine retribution. Still, I have seen the gods near here quite recently. Maybe she has a right to worry.
I bide my time until the lesson is over by reading the spines of as many books as I can touch with my hand. There are so many I haven’t read yet. It would take me three life times to read them all. I do leave a mental bookmark in my head for all the books that appear the most interesting. If I’m never going to leave The Glass Palace, I need something to occupy my time.
When the twins leave, Mother suggests we make our way to Lottie’s quarters. This is the first time we’ve been alone since she heard my opinion of my future. I’m relieved, but simultaneously irritated that she doesn’t want to
know how I feel about it.
I’m surprised to find that Lottie isn’t in at home, which is only a few doors away from my own, but with her parents. Apparently she wants their opinion on the marriage. Lottie’s parents are quite fastidious. They only want the best for their daughter.
“What if I don’t want to marry Lottie?” I say to Mother as we approach the closed door. I’m extremely nervous. There is sweat pouring down my neck.
“You don’t have to marry her if you don’t want to,” says Mother kindly. “It would be rude if you didn’t talk to her, though.”
“I suppose not,” I concede. I decide to press another issue. “Remember what you heard me say the other night?”
“You’ll have to time to adjust to your destined future. Your father didn’t want to be mayor either. He even ran away.”
I’m speechless. Father ran away from his responsibilities?
“I can see you think I’m joking, but I’m not. I should know, I was with him at the time. He was confused. His father was ill and his first wife had only recently died and he just wanted to get away. As his best friend, I went with him to make sure he didn’t do anything silly. We were away for nearly a year. When we returned we were hopelessly in love and I was pregnant with Dylan.”
“Why didn’t I know any of this?”
She shrugs. “It might give you ideas about running away yourself. Are you tempted to run away with Skye?”
“No!” I shout defensively, but she senses my doubts.
“Just take things one day at a time.”
I nod and Mother, apparently satisfied with my answer, knocks on the Grange-Casper’s door. When she does I hear a whistle. I look around and find Skye hiding behind a corner. She waves her suitcase at me, winks, waves, and disappears.
“Did you hear something?”
“No,” I say, feeling my heart sinking down to my stomach with grief.