“Engage vital scan of the planetoid. Scan for any moderately advanced tech, FTL or better. Monitor irregularities on the ground.”
“Let me go with you Vel. You owe me this and you know it.”
“He ain't here sweetheart. I can guarantee you that. All you're gonna find down there are some nasty little beasties that want to bite you pretty little face off,” Vel replied, pinching her cheek as he walked onto the Flea.
“Bullshit, i'm coming.”
“Fine. At least make yourself useful and go get three of the Prettyboys.”
“I didn't see any...”
“I'm not talking about strapping young gents, you hussy. They're combat droids.”
“Oh. I knew that.”
“No you didnt.”
“Ok. Probably not, but if I did know what they were...”
“They'd be in the aft droid deployment unit on level seven.”
“Ok, going to get some thingy things.”
“They're the other way.” Vel told her. He turned back to the display in the Flea. “Alright Lelantos, I don't want to lose another one of these. They're expensive.”
“Understood, sir.” Lelantos replied, “They're also difficult to recalibrate even when you don't completely lose them, so do be careful.”
“Alright, so let's take a look at the terrain and figure out where he would have setup shop.”
“No abnormalities in line with Phase engineering detected.”
“No, there wouldn't be. He isn't setting up a hub. The bastard means to find a rock he can burn out to skip into another civ. That way any evidence will be nothing more than a newly formed debris field. Not to mention that neither his species or his current ship are capable of formulating a clean phase without aid.”
“Adjusting parameters accordingly, Rosie.”
“Shafts...”
“Sir?”
“Very small, very deep drilling shafts.”
“I've located a sector of the planetoid that seems to have lost a significant amount of vegetation, in addition to severe soil instability in sixty places within a single square kilometer. There is something else though, sir.”
“Let me guess, sensors tripped by metal that isn't even native to this Prim?”
“Correct.”
“Hoooo leeee fuck these things are creepy, Vel.” Aariel shouted down the hall as she was returning with the Prettyboys.
“The lack of a head has been determined to be most unsettling to many sentient speicies.”
“That's because most of us have one Lelantos,” Vel said. “This is definitely it.”
“What'd you find?” Aariel asked.
“Either he made a ridiculously stupid mistake and left a cleanup crew or it's a trap.”
“Statistically speaking, sir, it is almost always a trap.”
“What? No percentage or ratio for me, smartass?”
“It seemed unnecessary given your proclivity for walking into traps.”
“I do enjoy a good setup.”
“So you want to drag me along into a trap on my first away mission with you?” Aariel asked.
“You already signed up, kid.” Vel told her. He promptly sealed the Flea and began to hop planetside before she could buckle in. “Besides, Lelantos is right. It really is almost always a trap.”
“I alreeeaaaaaaaddddyyyy hate you!” Aariel screamed, struggling to crawl into a seat.
“Most women do,” Lelantos told her through a Prettyboy unit, as the droid buckled her in.
“Hey, fuck you rustbucket,” Vel shot back. “It's right though. Most women that have spent time with me would rather hang out with one of the Prettyboys than see me again.”
“Entering atmosphere. Expect minor turbulence. Gravity variation of .34 higher than standard.”
“Setting us down 250m outside of the mining site. Lelantos, engage cloaking device as soon as we clear the cloud cover.”
“Gods... This is amazing.” Aariel said as they breached the cloud cover and began to descend into the lush jungle world. It was a world rife with bright colors and exotic birds flying above the tree tops. Trees that were themselves larger than many skytowers on Civ worlds. The multicolored leaves pulsed with life, the fluids of the vegetation flowing through them like the lifeblood of an animal. The largest trees boasted leaves that could entirely conceal the Flea. Vel made sure to land near a pile of fallen leaves about the same size.
Aariel was already unbuckled and moving toward the hatch when the Flea touched down. She had snagged a pulse rifle and a scanner. She was ready to kick some ass. Or so she thought.
“Landing sequence complete.” Lelantos blipped. With that Aariel grabbed the handle and started to open the door. Before she could turn it a quarter of the way, she found herself flung violently across the cabin, slamming into the Prettyboys as they were disengaging from their harnesses.
“Are you fucking braindead girl?” Vel roared, now standing over her.
“How... How'd you get there?” She asked, probably braindead for sure now.
“The average human moves at a maximum rate of 20 meters per second in standard gravity. Vel moves at a maximum rate of 112 meters per second.”
“What he said,” Vel responded, pointing at the intercom Lelantos had used. “Do you have any idea how many variables have to be checked before we can even open that hatch, you twit?”
“Is... Is computerface gonna tell me now?”
“No,” Vel replied, shutting them both up. “A lot. Leave it at that. If I wanted to kill a mark in an unusually cruel fashion, i'd breach the hull of his lander and disable its engines just before he hit the ground. Then, i'd phase away and leave that son of a bitch wondering what crazy, new ways this Prim had evolved to kill him.”
“Most likely a simple viral infection. Common enough that natives would not notice, but devestating to a being from an entirely different Universe. A short range teleporter can not eliminate a virus that has yet to be entered into its databases.”
“Oh. Sorry,” Aariel replied, staring at her feet. “I'll just sit her a bit while you figure out how to keep it from killing me?”
“Good plan, kid.”
“So, umm, do you think those trees can bleed out?”
“You talk a lot, don't you?”
“Yup, yup, yup.” Aariel replied. “You throw people on their heads a lot, I bet.”
“Fair enough,” Vel said. “Oh and you don't leave this ship without a full suit on.”
“What about you?”
“My armor has a rig to clean and even repair blood platelets built into it.”
“But how do you breathe?”
“My oxygen requirements are a fraction of yours, my respiratory system is also hundreds of times more efficient.”
“Damn, I wish I was a... one of... What did Lelantos say your species was called?”
“He didn't,” Vel replied, paying little attention to her as he sent hundreds of microscopic drones out to survey the area. “20 minutes until go time.”
“What's my job?”
“Not dying a horrible, violent death.”
“Very funny, Vel.”
“Darlin, that's 60% of this entire operation we run. You'll take a Pretty boy and head straight down the center. The other two will run the perimeter. I'll be taking out the droids he left behind. You're looking for signs of core decay. Lelantos will be able to pick it up just fine, even using a Prettyboy. It's your job to let him know if something doesn't feel right.”
“What if i'm wrong?”
“Then you've wasted thirty seconds of our limitless timetable. C'mon, get ready.”
“Just remember, if you mess up you've got three of the most powerful combat droids in all the known 'verses and me here with you. He ain't here, kid, but there's a chance we might find a breadcrumb.”
Vel's armor was impressive. It seemed to have a life of its own, the hue changing to match his as he adjusted to his envi
roment. Under good circumstances, he might be completely invisible to the naked eye. All unnecessary weapons and doodads had been stripped, it was obvious that the suit was missing its face plate.
“Ok, im ready,” Aariel lied, gripping the barrel of her rifle as if she were trying to snap it.
“Breach the seal, decontaminate as soon as we exit. You have your orders, i'll be nearby.”
With a woosh the hatch swung open. The Prettyboys exited first, forming a column around Aariel. Vel darted briefly forward and jumped. To Aariel's amazement, he completely cleared the pile of leaves that the Flea had parked behind.
Vel was out of sight, presumably well into their search area by the time Aariel and the Prettyboys reached the designated perimeter.
“Alright Lelantos, let's do this.” She said as the other two broke off in opposite directions. Her Prettyboy remained upright, but the other two had ceased to be bipedal once they began their search.
“Affirmative ma'am,” Lelantos replied, “The nearest shaft is 12 meters northwest of us.”
“Ok, let's go stare at it for a bit,” She said, still unsure exactly what she was supposed to be doing. “Why don't you have a face on these models?”
“It is unnecessary. This model is outfitted with thousands of fiberoptic sensor arrays that capture and record the same quality of detail as a normal droid's 'eyes'. Because they are intended for combat, Vel decided they shouldn't have heads.”
“But why?”
“A droid does not need one. Not only is this model linked to the ships main computer within 3 parsecs, but it also has a dozen independent fully functional processors placed through the core. Even if it lost three of the four limbs, it could still function in some capacity.”
“Why didn't you grab a rifle?” Aariel asked as she stopped near the edge of the shaft. It was a neat square, two meters across and unfathomably deep. Her helmet's sensors indicated that without the biosuit on, the heat inside the shaft would cook her alive before she had time to scream.
“I have no use for a rifle.”
“Lelantos. I think we're about to...” Aariel said, unconscioscly gripping for its wrist.
“Explain.”
“Damn, that's right. I can't use an emotional transferance with you,” She said, letting go of the droid's wrist and drawing her rifle up. “Something is watching us. If it were a droid, I wouldn't have felt it.”
“I am detecting a rather large heat signature behind us, blocking our line of retreat to the flea.”
“You can't see it?” She asked. Deep breath, she told herself. “Let's turn slowly and see if it shows.”
“Heat signature drawing closer, 30 meters max. Sensor arrays are detecting it is unclassified fauna, weighing at least three tons.”
“Tons? Did you just say three fucking tons?”
“Yes, it is drawing closer.”
“Slowly move away from the shaft, big guy,” She said, knowing her rifle was useless. “Contact Vel, fast.”
“Vel is not wearing an earpiece.”
“Then shock the fucking shit out of him and run straight for the center of the field. I'm counting on you not to drop us down a shaft.”
“Affirmative. I suggest we run now.”
“Good idea,” Aariel said, bolting away. The Prettyboy dropped to all fours, an impressive array of weapons springing from its back as it ran beside her.
“Correct course, two meters to the left.”
A deafening shriek tore through the air behind them. Aariel looked back in time to see a massive predator, clawing its way off of a shaft it had tripped over. Six legs, two tails, easily a few meters tall, and moving fast.
“He gave me one job Lelantos and i'm gonna manage to fuck that up!” Aariel screamed as she leapt over a collapsed shaft. The creature was closing fast, it would be upon them within seconds. “Do those weapons work?!”
“Don't fire!” Vel yelled, she hadn't even seen him until he was in the air leaping over her. “Keep going, rendevous with the other Prettyboys, we need to get off this rock and fast.”
“I don't know if you noticed, but big, scary, super monster!” Aariel screamed. Her foot caught a root and she tumbled. Suddenly she found herself falling down an open shaft. She was done for.
The beast screeched in the distance as Aariel desperately clawed for something, anything to slow her fall. She found nothing. The walls might as well have been carved out of granite. An explosion tore through the air above her, now she was being pelted with debris. Yet, suddenly she had stopped falling.
“Apologies ma'am, you blacked out for a moment when the bridle secured you.” She heard Lelantos saying, somewhere overhead. She groped around and found the rope reeling her, grabbing hold she twisted herself so that she could see what had happened.
Only small patches of sky were visible overhead, the Prettyboy had punched it's limbs into the walls to create a platform.
“What about Vel? Where is he?” She asked. Her head was pounding, her mouth filled with blood.
“Unsure of his exact location, he seems to have engaged the creature.”
“Can't the other droids help?”
“Negative, we would be unable to exit this shaft without them at the top.”
“Oh hell. What if it kills him Lelantos?”
“Actually, his vitals indicate that he is rather enjoying this encounter.”
“He's too fast for it, isn't he?” She asked as she clambored around to the other side of the droid and stood up. They were about twenty meters down. Not much light was coming in, but she could make out the other two at the top of the shaft.
“I believe so. It was unable to catch us, which should mean that he has the creature greatly outclassed in speed. He should be fine for a few moments, so long as it doesn't actually hit him. Please attach the harnesses being lowered to each limb, so that the other droids might pull us out.”
A moment later they were topside. Vel had drawn the creature off a ways. He was pulling it toward the treeline. Six limbs, two tails, and a massive, toothy head were all furiously trying to end the comparitively tiny bounty hunter.
Aariel saw a flash, probably a shot from Vel's blaster, hit it square in the face. That really pissed the behemoth off. It reared up on its hindlegs, the tails spread out and bracing the ground to balance it. Bellowing furiously, the creature lashed forward as Vel charged it. Then he was gone. She could no longer see him.
“Lelantos, where is he? What happened?” She screamed, panicking.
Suddenly, he emerged having slid between the hind legs. Vel threw a knife into the closest tail and slammed himself against the leg on the same side. The floor of the jungle shook as the beast crashed to the ground. It writhed about angrily for a moment, while Vel calmly grabbed his knife and walked away, before it went crashing into the jungle.
“You motherfucker!” Aariel yelled, punching Vel in the chest as he regrouped with them. “I thought that thing had eaten you.”
“Nah, it decided I wasn't worth the effort about the time you fell down the hole. That kind of distracted me, so I shot it in the eye. At that point, I could tell it just wanted to survive so I drew it away. Otherwise the dumb bastard would have fought me in the open until I was forced to kill it.”
“Is it blind now?”
“Partially. If you can call one out of sixteen partial blindness,” Vel laughed. “That's not important though. This is.”
“Umm, why do you have someone's head in your bag?”
“It's not a someone, it's a foreman droid. It's in my bag because I didn't like where it was when I found it.”
“Which was?”
“On its body, telling the other 150 droids that were in the shafts to kill us.”
“I would recommend we leave immediately,” Lelantos decided. All three pretty boys dropped down into battle mode.
“That's not even the best part,” Vel replied.
“It never is,” Lelan
tos responded.
“Did your computer just sigh at you?”
“Probably,” Vel responded, now jiggering with the foreman droid's circuits. “Hey, tell 'em that part you told me right before I absconded with your head.”
“Planetary...core...unstable...” The droid barely had enough power to speak, it was clearly going offline which meant its base had been compromised. “Incorrect injection parameters...complete...core...failure imminent....”
“I have no idea what the fuck that just said, but it doesn't sound good.”
“It means this whole rock is about to split wide open if we don't get back to our flagship and find a way to stabilize the core.”
“How much time did the operations foreman predict, Rosie?”