Junior shook hands with the ex-singer and said, “I’ll keep your secret! By the way, meeting you again and learning you’re alive and well is a great Christmas present!”
Aaron grinned and said, “I don’t want nobody to have a blue Christmas!”
Captain Marvel Junior smiled and quickly flew Eric Smith away from the club where commoners and a king could be found.
***
Mary Marvel was flying through a world of white as snow blew all around her, and she sped through the icy wastelands of Antarctica to the South Pole. She wore her red and gold minidress with slippers, and she flew higher and higher as she tried to find some clue to the disappearance of John McGuire.
Mrs. McGuire told me that John was studying ozone depletion when he vanished. His fellow scientists were able to direct me to the South Pole itself, where John was last known to be heading. He was checking some of their monitoring equipment when he failed to either return to camp or radio in with a report!
“It’s ironic that a case would bring me to the South Pole this night,” said Mary, “since so much of Christmas lore centers around the North Pole and Santa’s workshop!”
Before the flying girl could do anything, a beam of concentrated force struck her from above. She fell into a snow bank and then jumped skyward and fought her way higher against the continuing pressure of the ray beam.
“I’m not sure who is taking potshots at me, but it will take more than this to stop me!” she vowed.
She forced her way directly into the beam of light and felt her body change to tiny particles of light, before it reformed aboard a huge alien craft where small aliens with pointed ears and sharp features stood ready to face their latest guest.
“Goodness!” she said. “I’d think these were Santa’s elves if I didn’t know better!”
“You are unlike the others on this world! You are stronger, faster, smarter! You will make a better guide than the human we captured earlier.”
The words echoed in her mind as the aliens communicated with her via a form of telepathy.
“You abducted poor Mr. McGuire! Where is he?” demanded Mary. “Tell me, or I’ll have to demonstrate just how strong I am, and your crew won’t enjoy the experience!”
An alien appeared from below deck and brought out a slightly dazed-looking man. “This is human designated McGuire. We have not harmed him! We came here in search of something unique to Earth. In order to better understand it and experience it, we brought this human aboard.”
“Mary Marvel, are you ever a sight for sore eyes!” said Dr. McGuire. “These little aliens took me days ago! They keep asking me the same questions again and again!”
Mary sat down on both knees and looked at the nearest alien. ”Tell me what brought you here,” she said. “Maybe I can take you to it or explain it to you.”
The alien thought, and Mary heard the words, “We came here to find what you Earthlings call Christmas!”
“Christmas? It’s a seasonal celebration with spiritual meaning and certain rituals and observances popularized by both custom and the media,” said the scientist. ”I’ve told them that before!”
Mary smiled and looked at McGuire in amusement. ”I think maybe instead of telling them in such a clinical but accurate way, it would be better to show them!” she said. “If you will follow me, I’ll try to show you Christmas!”
The little men gathered around her, and their thoughts almost stunned her with their eager intensity. “Indeed! Take us to Christmas! That will fulfill our mission!”
***
Captain Marvel and Santa Claus had reached the North Pole, and the world’s mightiest mortal frowned as he spotted a strange army of humanoid-sized toy soldiers. Each one stood still as if on sentry duty.
“Those things were never made by any of my Elves!” vowed Santa.
Captain Marvel moved as quickly as the magic lightning that enabled him to transform himself from Billy. He blocked a barrage of high-energy fire that came from the rapidly raised and fired rifles of the army of toy soldiers.
“I’m glad your elves didn’t whip up those lethal toys!” he said. “I can think of a lot of parents who would be pretty upset if their kid found one of these under the tree!”
Santa spread wide his arms and shrugged. ”That’s the problem, son! I lost my powers and my home before I had completed this year’s toys. If we don’t get inside my workshop below and restore my powers before long, it will be too late for me to finish and deliver the toys!”
Cap nodded grimly. ”I’m not going to let any Grinch stop Christmas!” he said.
He spun around and broke through the frozen ground until he had created a tunnel that led directly below the toy soldiers. Before they could fire at Santa again, Captain Marvel smashed them to scrap metal.
“This way!” he said. “I can almost smell the gingerbread!”
“I’ll never be so glad to see Mrs. Claus, Rudolph, and even Grover again!” said Santa.
Captain Marvel marched confidently forward and shoved open a door that was decorated with a red and green wreath. He pushed his way past another row of giant Jack-in-the-box toys that threatened to crush him between their enhanced coils. ”You fellows can just stay in your box!” he said as he hammered them down with super-strength.
“What kind of fiend would turn toys into deadly weapons?” asked a disgusted Santa.
“That would be that jolly old elf me!” cried a voice as a little bald man emerged from behind a stuffed bear.
“Sivana! I should have known!” cried Santa Claus. “You’ve topped the naughty list since before the First World War!”
Captain Marvel rolled up his sleeves and said, “This will be my pleasure! I’ll giftwrap and deliver him to his customary cell!”
Santa grabbed Captain Marvel’s arm and said, “Wait! Look around you! He’s actually finished all the toys I had left undone! They are even loaded and ready to go in my magic sleigh!”
Thaddeus Bodog Sivana shook his head sadly and said, “I felt that stealing Santa’s powers would ruin Christmas and thus erase my past disgrace from winning the Nobel Peace Prize by accident years ago! I mean, what’s worse than stealing from old Saint Nick?”
“You sapped my Christmas magic with that big machine over there, didn’t you?” said Santa. “One good flip of the switch will restore me. I know a bit about inventions, too!” He flipped a switch on a huge green and gold machine and began to glow with twinkling energy.
“Ho, ho, ho! I’m back in business!” he said with a booming laugh.
Captain Marvel gripped Dr. Sivana by his collar and said, “After you took Santa’s Christmas magic with the machine, you accidentally absorbed some of it! That machine’s shielding is faulty due to the intense cold!”
Sivana shook his head sadly. ”Right. Something made me want to make real toys and even improve some of the processes here at the North Pole workshop! I even started to–” He gulped. “–like people!” he finished with a look of horror.
“Thanks to Sivana’s work, I’ll be able to deliver all the toys after all!” said Santa.
Captain Marvel smiled broadly and said, “It just shows you that evenSivana’s evil heart was no match for the spirit of Christmas!”
“Bah! Humbug!” said Sivana. “I forgot to disable a few of those toy weapons outside, even after I got that sick warm feeling! How I wish one of them would have turned you into a big red holiday cheese ball!”
“I’ll just drop him off at his cell,” said Captain Marvel. “Merry Christmas, Santa!” He flew off with the bitter scientist and left Santa Claus to begin his rounds.
***
At the WHIZ Christmas party, a festive tree and colorful lights dominated the room where assembled staffers and guests enjoyed the annual Christmas Eve party.
Mary Marvel beamed with pleasure as she watched the reunion of the joyful McGuire family. Little Tina sat on her father’s lap while his wife held his hand.
Tina turned to Mary a
nd said, “You did it! You and Santa really did bring my Daddy back home!”
Uncle Marvel smiled happily and gulped down some punch as he heard Tina’s words. Mary smiled and kissed the child as the aliens watched carefully.
“This sense of warmth and giving must be what they mean by Christmas!”thought one of them.
“Fellowship and friendship and love for others all make Christmas what it is!” said Mary. “It all comes down to the effects from the night God’s son was born into our world!”
The aliens munched on candy canes and projected thoughts of pleasure. “You’ve shown us what Christmas truly is!” thought one as he looked at the loving family and heard the carols in the background.
Captain Marvel Junior shook hands with station owner Sterling Morris as he agreed to give Eric Smith a job at the station based on Junior’s recommendation.
“We need someone here to keep the mobile news van running smoothly,” announced the older man. “You can start first thing Monday morning!”
“Thanks, sir!” said Eric Smith. “I’ll do a great job. Thank you, too, Captain Marvel Junior!”
“My pleasure,” Captain Marvel Junior said. “If I hadn’t gone looking for you, I might not have met an old friend like I did!”
Billy Batson rushed inside and smiled happily as he was greeted by his old pal Mr. Tawky Tawny, the talking tiger.
“Billy, good to see you!” said the jovial and dapper tiger.
“Happy holidays to you!” said Billy.
Seeing the McGuires, he noticed little Tina looking at the tree and presents. He caught Dr. McGuire’s eye and slipped him the wrapped gift he had bought for Cissie. ”Tina should have something from her dad,” Billy said. “I know you didn’t get to shop, since the aliens took you days ago!”
Dr. McGuire thanked him warmly and gave the package to a thrilled Tina.
Mary had quietly slipped away and changed back to Mary Batson. She returned in time to see Billy’s kind act, and she sighed. ”Billy, that was so sweet! But Cissie is here already, too. What will you give her?”
“I guess I’ll have to tell her the truth,” said Billy.
Cissie Sommerly rushed up then and kissed Billy warmly before he could speak.
“Holy Moley! That was really something!” he said as he started to blush.
Cissie held up a piglet ornament and said, “I love it! You are so thoughtful!”
Billy smiled and said, “You’re welcome! I’m glad you like it!”
“I do!” said Cissie. “Let me get us some punch!” She walked over to the tables, and Billy turned to Mary in surprise.
“But I gave the ornament I bought for Cissie to Tina! How’d she get that one?” he asked.
“I think you have a friend in high places!” said Mary. She gestured to the roof, where the sound of sleigh bells could be heard along with jolly laughter.
“Thanks, Santa! I owe you one!” whispered Billy.
He raised the punch Cissie brought over, and in a loud voice he said, “Merry Christmas, folks!”
The End
Showcase: Villains
Bad Little Boys and Girls
by HarveyKent
How do super-villains celebrate Christmas? See a rare glimpse into the “off-duty” hours of the most dastardly do-badders of all at the Bar Sinister! Meanwhile, who is the mystery man masquerading as Santa Claus?
***
The Martian Manhunter sat at the communications console in the JLA satellite, watching the monitors and stifling a yawn. He had been on duty nearly six hours, and nothing had happened worthy of his attention. It was always like this on this one night of nights. A blinking light on the console told him that the transporter tube was being used. He spied the readout, which scanned the molecular pattern of the being or beings teleporting into the satellite. Aquaman. Excellent. He was just in time to relieve him.
“Hi, J’onn,” the king of the seven seas said warmly, stepping into the communications center. “How’s it going?”
“Slowly, my friend, slowly,” the green-skinned Martian said, smiling. “Have you ever noticed that it’s always like this on Christmas Eve?”
“I have,” Aquaman said. “Sometimes we get a natural disaster, or a terrorist attack, or some ordinary crime. But it’s like super-villain activity comes to a halt.”
“If they pick one night a year to act sensibly,” J’onn J’onzz said, rising from his chair, “let it be this one. The console is all yours, my friend.”
“Want to stay for a game of chess or two?” Aquaman offered.
“Tempting,” J’onn said, smiling. Aquaman was just about the only Leaguer who would play games of skill with him; only another telepath. “But Nubia has made plans for this evening. Something involving a midnight madness sale, whatever that is.”
Aquaman chuckled. “Enjoy yourself.” He watched his longtime friend walk out of the room, heard the hum of the teleporter, and sat back in his chair. He dialed up a Clive Cussler novel on the Justice League’s electronic text library and settled down to a quiet evening of reading.
***
Somewhere in the American Midwest, a grand hotel building stood dark and quiet. In the 1930s, the hotel had been a lively place, full of laughter, music, and gaiety. For the last two decades it had stood empty, ownerless, and condemned. It was situated so far away from the new super-highway, it was considered undesirable commercial property; no one had any interest in it. Had anyone looked closely enough tonight, they would have noticed the basement-level windows covered with black paper from the inside.
“…and then Flash says, ‘Eww! I thought Green Arrow had better aim than that!’” The little group standing around the Calculator burst into laughter at the joke.
“Cal, you’re a scream,” Poison Ivy giggled.
The basement of the condemned hotel was filled with laughter, music, and gaiety. Lights blazed from every corner. One wall was lined with a long buffet table filled with sumptuous food and drink. Music poured from two huge speakers mounted in the corners of the room. Over it all was the din of people talking, laughing, and enjoying each other’s company.
“It’s a shame Phil didn’t make it this year,” the Cavalier said, frowning into his mint julep.
“You know he’s retired,” one of the Sizematic Twins said around a mouthful of crab puff. “Shacked up with Darklight and living the life of a gentleman on the Outer Banks.”
“I know, but we’re still his friends,” Cavalier said. “Why couldn’t he join the party?”
“Maybe he’s afraid someone would try to talk him into one last grand scheme,” the Marine Marauder offered.
“Or that the Crumbler would pick a fight with him, for running out on us,” Calculator offered. (*)
[(*) Editor's note: See The Secret Society of Super-Villains: Don't Try Anything Funky.]
“Isn’t he still in jail?” Poison Ivy asked.
“Sure, but maybe Phil doesn’t know that.”
“Well, the party’s early yet,” Brain Storm said. “A lot of people still haven’t shown up. Maybe he’ll turn up.”
“Yeah, maybe,” Cavalier said, and took another pull at his mint julep.
***
“Sister Agnes, when is Santa coming?” a little boy in Transformers pyjamas whined.
“Soon, Andrew, very soon,” the middle-aged nun said. “He has a very busy schedule tonight, you know.”
“I know,” the boy said. “But he’ll be here, won’t he?”
“Of course he will,” the nun said. She believed it, too. In seven years, he hadn’t missed a Christmas Eve yet.
“Ho-ho-ho!” a robust voice suddenly boomed. “Merry Christmas, everyone!”
“Santa!” the children shrieked, and raced to the portly figure in red and white that was suddenly standing inside their door. Sister Agnes smiled. He did that every year. One year, he was going to have to tell her how he did it.
***
“Hey, Key!” the Prankster called. “We ne
ed one more at the piano for carols. How about it?”
“No thanks, Prankster,” the Key said. “Bad Penny and the Silken Spider asked me to help them make popcorn balls. And the Key never turns down a lady’s request.”
“A lady’s request?” Prankster giggled. “What’s that got to do with Penny and Spider?”
“I heard that, you low-rent whoopie-cushion peddler!” Silken Spider snarled. “If it weren’t Christmas Eve, I’d use your game-show-host jacket to hang you with!”
“Ladies, ladies!” the Key said, taking the two villainesses by the arm and leading them away. “‘Tis Christmas, after all. Come on; who’s got the caramel syrup?”
“Same old Key,” Prankster said, shaking his head. “A sucker for the fairer sex. It’ll be his downfall someday. Oh, well, you can’t sing God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen in three-part harmony! Hey, Quakemaster!”
***
“And what would you like for Christmas, Debbie?” Santa asked the dark-haired little girl sitting on his knee.
“Barbie Corvette!” the little girl exclaimed happily.
Santa’s eyes widened as he stared at her. “Barbie Corvette? Are you sure you wouldn’t rather have a wooden rocking horse?”
“No!” the little girl said firmly, sticking her lower lip out in a pout. “Wanna Barbie Corvette!”
“I see,” Santa said, reaching into his big red sack. “Well, I knew there was a reason I brought one!” He hauled out the brightly colored cardboard box, and Debbie squealed with glee as he handed it to her.
“What do we say, Debbie?” Sister Agnes asked.
“Fank-oo,” Debbie burbled, shyly. She slid off his knee and raced away to open her present. “Who’s next?” Santa asked.
***
“I give up,” the Fisherman said, throwing up his hands. “Where are you always going, but never get to?”
“There,” the Riddler said, smugly.
“There?” Weather Wizard asked, raising his eyebrow in confusion.
“Sure,” Riddler said. “Because when you get to it, it’s here!”
“Ouch,” Cat-Man groaned. “Eddie, your riddles are getting worse.”