CHAPTER XXVII
This way lie safety and a sure retreat; Yonder lie danger, shame, and punishment Most welcome danger then--Nay, let me say, Though spoke with swelling heart--welcome e'en shame And welcome punishment--for, call me guilty, I do but pay the tax that's due to justice; And call me guiltless, then that punishment Is shame to those alone who do inflict it, _The Tribunal_.
We left Lord Glenvarloch, to whose fortunes our story chiefly attachesitself, gliding swiftly down the Thames. He was not, as the reader mayhave observed, very affable in his disposition, or apt to enter intoconversation with those into whose company he was casually thrown. Thiswas, indeed, an error in his conduct, arising less from pride, thoughof that feeling we do not pretend to exculpate him, than from a sort ofbashful reluctance to mix in the conversation of those with whom he wasnot familiar. It is a fault only to be cured by experience and knowledgeof the world, which soon teaches every sensible and acute person theimportant lesson, that amusement, and, what is of more consequence,that information and increase of knowledge, are to be derived from theconversation of every individual whatever, with whom he is thrown intoa natural train of communication. For ourselves, we can assure thereader--and perhaps if we have ever been able to afford him amusement,it is owing in a great degree to this cause--that we never foundourselves in company with the stupidest of all possible companions in apost-chaise, or with the most arrant cumber-corner that ever occupieda place in the mail-coach, without finding, that, in the course of ourconversation with him, we had some ideas suggested to us, either graveorgay, or some information communicated in the course of our journey,which we should have regretted not to have learned, and which we shouldbe sorry to have immediately forgotten. But Nigel was somewhat immuredwithin the Bastile of his rank, as some philosopher (Tom Paine, wethink) has happily enough expressed that sort of shyness which men ofdignified situations are apt to be beset with, rather from not exactlyknowing how far, or with whom, they ought to be familiar, than from anyreal touch of aristocratic pride. Besides, the immediate pressure ofour adventurer's own affairs was such as exclusively to engross hisattention.
He sat, therefore, wrapt in his cloak, in the stern of the boat, withhis mind entirely bent upon the probable issue of the interview with hisSovereign, which it was his purpose to seek; for which abstraction ofmind he may be fully justified, although perhaps, by questioningthe watermen who were transporting him down the river, he might havediscovered matters of high concernment to him.
At any rate, Nigel remained silent till the wherry approached thetown of Greenwich, when he commanded the men to put in for the nearestlanding-place, as it was his purpose to go ashore there, and dismissthem from further attendance.
"That is not possible," said the fellow with the green jacket, who, aswe have already said, seemed to take on himself the charge of pilotage."We must go," he continued, "to Gravesend, where a Scottish vessel,which dropped down the river last tide for the very purpose, lieswith her anchor a-peak, waiting to carry you to your own dear northerncountry. Your hammock is slung, and all is ready for you, and you talkof going ashore at Greenwich, as seriously as if such a thing werepossible!"
"I see no impossibility," said Nigel, "in your landing me where I desireto be landed; but very little possibility of your carrying me anywhere Iam not desirous of going."
"Why, whether do you manage the wherry, or we, master?" askedGreen-jacket, in a tone betwixt jest and earnest; "I take it she will gothe way we row her."
"Ay," retorted Nigel, "but I take it you will row her on the course Idirect you, otherwise your chance of payment is but a poor one."
"Suppose we are content to risk that," said the undaunted waterman, "Iwish to know how you, who talk so big--I mean no offence, master, butyou do talk big--would help yourself in such a case?"
"Simply thus," answered Lord Glenvarloch--"You saw me, an hour since,bring down to the boat a trunk that neither of you could lift. If we areto contest the destination of our voyage, the same strength whichtossed that chest into the wherry, will suffice to fling you out of it;wherefore, before we begin the scuffle, I pray you to remember, that,whither I would go, there I will oblige you to carry me."
"Gramercy for your kindness," said Green-jacket; "and now mark me inreturn. My comrade and I are two men--and you, were you as stout asGeorge-a-Green, can pass but for one; and two, you will allow, are morethan a match for one. You mistake in your reckoning, my friend."
"It is you who mistake," answered Nigel, who began to grow warm; "it isI who am three to two, sirrah--I carry two men's lives at my girdle."
So saying, he opened his cloak and showed the two pistols which he haddisposed at his girdle. Green-jacket was unmoved at the display.
"I have got," said he, "a pair of barkers that will match yours," and heshowed that he also was armed with pistols; "so you may begin as soon asyou list."
"Then," said Lord Glenvarloch, drawing forth and cocking a pistol,"the sooner the better. Take notice, I hold you as a ruffian, who havedeclared you will put force on my person; and that I will shoot youthrough the head if you do not instantly put me ashore at Greenwich."
The other waterman, alarmed at Nigel's gesture, lay upon his oar; butGreen-jacket replied coolly--"Look you, master, I should not care atester to venture a life with you on this matter; but the truth is, I amemployed to do you good, and not to do you harm."
"By whom are you employed?" said the Lord Glenvarloch; "or who dareconcern themselves in me, or my affairs, without my authority?"
"As to that," answered the waterman, in the same tone of indifference,"I shall not show my commission. For myself, I care not, as I said,whether you land at Greenwich to get yourself hanged, or go down to getaboard the Royal Thistle, to make your escape to your own country; youwill be equally out of my reach either way. But it is fair to put thechoice before you."
"My choice is made," said Nigel. "I have told you thrice already it ismy pleasure to be landed at Greenwich."
"Write it on a piece of paper," said the waterman, "that such is yourpositive will; I must have something to show to my employers, that thetransgression of their orders lies with yourself, not with me."
"I choose to hold this trinket in my hand for the present," said Nigel,showing his pistol, "and will write you the acquittance when I goashore."
"I would not go ashore with you for a hundred pieces," said thewaterman. "Ill luck has ever attended you, except in small gaming; do mefair justice, and give me the testimony I desire. If you are afraid offoul play while you write it, you may hold my pistols, if you will." Heoffered the weapons to Nigel accordingly, who, while they were underhis control, and all possibility of his being taken at disadvantage wasexcluded, no longer hesitated to give the waterman an acknowledgment, inthe following terms:--
"Jack in the Green, with his mate, belonging to the wherry calledthe Jolly Raven, have done their duty faithfully by me, landing meat Greenwich by my express command; and being themselves willing anddesirous to carry me on board the Royal Thistle, presently lying atGravesend." Having finished this acknowledgment, which he signedwith the letters, N. O. G. as indicating his name and title, he againrequested to know of the waterman, to whom he delivered it, the name ofhis employers.
"Sir," replied Jack in the Green, "I have respected your secret, do notyou seek to pry into mine. It would do you no good to know for whom Iam taking this present trouble; and, to be brief, you shall not knowit--and, if you will fight in the quarrel, as you said even now, thesooner we begin the better. Only this you may be cock-sure of, that wedesigned you no harm, and that, if you fall into any, it will be of yourown wilful seeking." As he spoke, they approached the landing-place,where Nigel instantly jumped ashore. The waterman placed his smallmail-trunk on the stairs, observing that there were plenty of sparehands about, to carry it where he would.
"We part friends, I hope, my lads," said the young nobleman, offering atthe same time a piece of money more than double the
usual fare, to theboatmen.
"We part as we met," answered Green-jacket; "and, for your money, I ampaid sufficiently with this bit of paper. Only, if you owe me any lovefor the cast I have given you, I pray you not to dive so deep into thepockets of the next apprentice that you find fool enough to play thecavalier.--And you, you greedy swine," said he to his companion, whostill had a longing eye fixed on the money which Nigel continued tooffer, "push off, or, if I take a stretcher in hand, I'll break theknave's pate of thee." The fellow pushed off, as he was commanded, butstill could not help muttering, "This was entirely out of waterman'srules."
Glenvarloch, though without the devotion of the "injured Thales" of themoralist, to the memory of that great princess, had now attained
"The hallow'd soil which gave Eliza birth,"
whose halls were now less respectably occupied by her successor. It wasnot, as has been well shown by a late author, that James was void eitherof parts or of good intentions; and his predecessor was at least asarbitrary in effect as he was in theory. But, while Elizabeth possesseda sternness of masculine sense and determination which rendered even herweaknesses, some of which were in themselves sufficiently ridiculous, ina certain degree respectable, James, on the other hand, was so utterlydevoid of "firm resolve," so well called by the Scottish bard,
"The stalk of carle-hemp in man,"
that even his virtues and his good meaning became laughable, from thewhimsical uncertainty of his conduct; so that the wisest things he eversaid, and the best actions he ever did, were often touched with a strainof the ludicrous and fidgety character of the man. Accordingly, thoughat different periods of his reign he contrived to acquire with hispeople a certain degree of temporary popularity, it never long outlivedthe occasion which produced it; so true it is, that the mass of mankindwill respect a monarch stained with actual guilt, more than one whosefoibles render him only ridiculous.
To return from this digression, Lord Glenvarloch soon received, asGreen-jacket had assured him, the offer of an idle bargeman to transporthis baggage where he listed; but that where was a question of momentarydoubt. At length, recollecting the necessity that his hair and beardshould be properly arranged before he attempted to enter the royalpresence, and desirous, at the same time, of obtaining some informationof the motions of the Sovereign and of the Court, he desired to beguided to the next barber's shop, which we have already mentioned asthe place where news of every kind circled and centred. He was speedilyshown the way to such an emporium of intelligence, and soon found he waslikely to hear all he desired to know, and much more, while his head wassubjected to the art of a nimble tonsor, the glibness of whose tonguekept pace with the nimbleness of his fingers while he ran on, withoutstint or stop, in the following excursive manner:--
"The Court here, master?--yes, master--much to the advantage oftrade--good custom stirring. His Majesty loves Greenwich--hunts everymorning in the Park--all decent persons admitted that have the entriesof the Palace--no rabble--frightened the king's horse with theirhallooing, the uncombed slaves.--Yes, sir, the beard more peaked?Yes, master, so it is worn. I know the last cut--dress several of thecourtiers--one valet-of-the-chamber, two pages of the body, the clerkof the kitchen, three running footmen, two dog-boys, and an honourableScottish knight, Sir Munko Malgrowler."
"Malagrowther, I suppose?" said Nigel, thrusting in his conjecturalemendation, with infinite difficulty, betwixt two clauses of thebarber's text.
"Yes, sir--Malcrowder, sir, as you say, sir--hard names the Scots have,sir, for an English mouth. Sir Munko is a handsome person, sir--perhapsyou know him--bating the loss of his fingers, and the lameness of hisleg, and the length of his chin. Sir, it takes me one minute, twelveseconds, more time to trim that chin of his, than any chin that I knowin the town of Greenwich, sir. But he is a very comely gentleman,for all that; and a pleasant--a very pleasant gentleman, sir--and agood-humoured, saving that he is so deaf he can never hear good ofany one, and so wise, that he can never believe it; but he is a verygood-natured gentleman for all that, except when one speaks too low, orwhen a hair turns awry.--Did I graze you, sir? We shall put it to rightsin a moment, with one drop of styptic--my styptic, or rather my wife's,sir--She makes the water herself. One drop of the styptic, sir, and abit of black taffeta patch, just big enough to be the saddle to a flea,sir--Yes, sir, rather improves than otherwise. The Prince had a patchthe other day, and so had the Duke: and, if you will believe me, thereare seventeen yards three quarters of black taffeta already cut intopatches for the courtiers."
"But Sir Mungo Malagrowther?" again interjected Nigel, with difficulty.
"Ay, ay, sir--Sir Munko, as you say; a pleasant, good-humoured gentlemanas ever--To be spoken with, did you say? O ay, easily to be spokenwithal, that is, as easily as his infirmity will permit. He willpresently, unless some one hath asked him forth to breakfast, be takinghis bone of broiled beef at my neighbour Ned Kilderkin's yonder,removed from over the way. Ned keeps an eating-house, sir, famous forpork-griskins; but Sir Munko cannot abide pork, no more than theKing's most Sacred Majesty,[Footnote: The Scots, till within the lastgeneration, disliked swine's flesh as an article of food as much as theHighlanders do at present. It was remarked as extraordinary rapacity,when the Border depredators condescended to make prey of the accursedrace, whom the fiend made his habitation. Ben Jonson, in drawing James'scharacter, says, he loved "no part of a swine."] nor my Lord Duke ofLennox, nor Lord Dalgarno,--nay, I am sure, sir, if I touched you thistime, it was your fault, not mine.--But a single drop of the styptic,another little patch that would make a doublet for a flea, just underthe left moustache; it will become you when you smile, sir, as well asa dimple; and if you would salute your fair mistress--but I beg pardon,you are a grave gentleman, very grave to be so young.--Hope I have givenno offence; it is my duty to entertain customers--my duty, sir, and mypleasure--Sir Munko Malcrowther?--yes, sir, I dare say he is at thismoment in Ned's eating-house, for few folks ask him out, now LordHuntinglen is gone to London. You will get touched again--yes,sir--there you shall find him with his can of single ale, stirred with asprig of rosemary, for he never drinks strong potations, sir, unless tooblige Lord Huntinglen--take heed, sir--or any other person who asks himforth to breakfast--but single beer he always drinks at Ned's, with hisbroiled bone of beef or mutton--or, it may be, lamb at the season--butnot pork, though Ned is famous for his griskins. But the Scots never eatpork--strange that! some folk think they are a sort of Jews. There is aresemblance, sir,--Do you not think so? Then they call our most graciousSovereign the Second Solomon, and Solomon, you know, was King of theJews; so the thing bears a face, you see. I believe, sir, you willfind yourself trimmed now to your content. I will be judged by the fairmistress of your affections. Crave pardon--no offence, I trust. Pray,consult the glass--one touch of the crisping tongs, to reduce thisstraggler.--Thank your munificence, sir--hope your custom while you stayin Greenwich. Would you have a tune on that ghittern, to put your temperin concord for the day?--Twang, twang--twang, twang, dillo. Somethingout of tune, sir--too many hands to touch it--we cannot keep thesethings like artists. Let me help you with your cloak, sir--yes,sir--You would not play yourself, sir, would you?--Way to Sir Munko'seating-house?--Yes, sir; but it is Ned's eating-house, not SirMunko's.--The knight, to be sure, eats there, and makes it hiseating-house in some sense, sir--ha, ha! Yonder it is, removed from overthe way, new white-washed posts, and red lattice--fat man in his doubletat the door--Ned himself, sir--worth a thousand pounds, they say--bettersingeing pigs' faces than trimming courtiers--but ours is the lessmechanical vocation.--Farewell, sir; hope your custom." So saying, heat length permitted Nigel to depart, whose ears, so long tormented withcontinued babble, tingled when it had ceased, as if a bell had been rungclose to them for the same space of time.
Upon his arrival at the eating-house, where he proposed to meet with SirMungo Malagrowther, from whom, in despair of better advice, he trustedto receive some information as to the best mode of introducing himself
into the royal presence, Lord Glenvarloch found, in the host with whomhe communed, the consequential taciturnity of an Englishman well to passin the world. Ned Kilderkin spoke as a banker writes, only touching theneedful. Being asked if Sir Mungo Malagrowther was there? he replied,No. Being interrogated whether he was expected? he said, Yes. And beingagain required to say when he was expected, he answered, Presently.As Lord Glenvarloch next inquired, whether he himself could have anybreakfast? the landlord wasted not even a syllable in reply, but,ushering him into a neat room where there were several tables, he placedone of them before an armchair, and beckoning Lord Glenvarloch to takepossession, he set before him, in a very few minutes, a substantialrepast of roast-beef, together with a foaming tankard, to whichrefreshment the keen air of the river disposed him, notwithstanding hismental embarrassments, to do much honour.
While Nigel was thus engaged in discussing his commons, but raising hishead at the same time whenever he heard the door of the apartment open,eagerly desiring the arrival of Sir Mungo Malagrowther, (an event whichhad seldom been expected by any one with so much anxious interest,) apersonage, as it seemed, of at least equal importance with the knight,entered into the apartment, and began to hold earnest colloquy withthe publican, who thought proper to carry on the conference on his sideunbonneted. This important gentleman's occupation might be guessed fromhis dress. A milk-white jerkin, and hose of white kersey; a white aprontwisted around his body in the manner of a sash, in which, instead of awar-like dagger, was stuck a long-bladed knife, hilted with buck's-horn;a white nightcap on his head, under which his hair was neatly tucked,sufficiently pourtrayed him as one of those priests of Comus whom thevulgar call cooks; and the air with which he rated the publican forhaving neglected to send some provisions to the Palace, showed that heministered to royalty itself.
"This will never answer," he said, "Master Kilderkin--the king twiceasked for sweetbreads, and fricasseed coxcombs, which are a favouritedish of his most Sacred Majesty, and they were not to be had, becauseMaster Kilderkin had not supplied them to the clerk of the kitchen, asby bargain bound." Here Kilderkin made some apology, brief, accordingto his own nature, and muttered in a lowly tone after the fashion of allwho find themselves in a scrape. His superior replied, in a loftystrain of voice, "Do not tell me of the carrier and his wain, and of thehen-coops coming from Norfolk with the poultry; a loyal man would havesent an express--he would have gone upon his stumps, like Widdrington.What if the king had lost his appetite, Master Kilderkin? What if hismost Sacred Majesty had lost his dinner? O, Master Kilderkin, if you hadbut the just sense of the dignity of our profession, which is told ofby the witty African slave, for so the king's most excellent Majestydesignates him, Publius Terentius, _Tanguam in specula--in patinasinspicerejubeo_."
"You are learned, Master Linklater," replied the English publican,compelling, as it were with difficulty, his mouth to utter three or fourwords consecutively.
"A poor smatterer," said Mr. Linklater; "but it would be a shame to us,who are his most excellent Majesty's countrymen, not in some sort tohave cherished those arts wherewith he is so deeply embued--_Regis adexemplar_, Master Kilderkin, _totus componitur orbis_--which is asmuch as to say, as the king quotes the cook learns. In brief, MasterKilderkin, having had the luck to be bred where humanities may be hadat the matter of an English five groats by the quarter, I, like others,have acquired--ahem-hem!--" Here, the speaker's eye having fallen uponLord Glenvarloch, he suddenly stopped in his learned harangue, withsuch symptoms of embarrassment as induced Ned Kilderkin to stretch histaciturnity so far as not only to ask him what he ailed, but whether hewould take any thing.
"Ail nothing," replied the learned rival of the philosophical Syrus;"Nothing--and yet I do feel a little giddy. I could taste a glass ofyour dame's _aqua mirabilis_."
"I will fetch it," said Ned, giving a nod; and his back was no soonerturned, than the cook walked near the table where Lord Glenvarloch wasseated, and regarding him with a look of significance, where more wasmeant than met the ear, said,--"You are a stranger in Greenwich, sir.I advise you to take the opportunity to step into the Park--the westernwicket was ajar when I came hither; I think it will be locked presently,so you had better make the best of your way--that is, if you have anycuriosity. The venison are coming into season just now, sir, and thereis a pleasure in looking at a hart of grease. I always think when theyare bounding so blithely past, what a pleasure it would be, to broachtheir plump haunches on a spit, and to embattle their breasts in a noblefortification of puff-paste, with plenty of black pepper."
He said no more, as Kilderkin re-entered with the cordial, but edged offfrom Nigel without waiting any reply, only repeating the same look ofintelligence with which he had accosted him.
Nothing makes men's wits so alert as personal danger. Nigel took thefirst opportunity which his host's attention to the yeoman of the royalkitchen permitted, to discharge his reckoning, and readily obtained adirection to the wicket in question. He found it upon the latch, ashe had been taught to expect; and perceived that it admitted him to anarrow footpath, which traversed a close and tangled thicket, designedfor the cover of the does and the young fawns. Here he conjectured itwould be proper to wait; nor had he been stationary above five minutes,when the cook, scalded as much with heat of motion as ever he had beenby his huge fire-place, arrived almost breathless, and with his pass-keyhastily locked the wicket behind him.
Ere Lord Glenvarloch had time to speculate upon this action, the manapproached with anxiety, and said--"Good lord, my Lord Glenvarloch!--whywill you endanger yourself thus?"
"You know me then, my friend?" said Nigel.
"Not much of that, my lord--but I know your honour's noble housewell.--My name is Laurie Linklater, my lord."
"Linklater!" repeated Nigel. "I should recollect--'
"Under your lordship's favour," he continued, "I was 'prentice, mylord, to old Mungo Moniplies, the flesher at the wanton West-Port ofEdinburgh, which I wish I saw again before I died. And, your honour'snoble father having taken Richie Moniplies into his house to wait onyour lordship, there was a sort of connexion, your lordship sees."
"Ah!" said Lord Glenvarloch, "I had almost forgot your name, but notyour kind purpose. You tried to put Richie in the way of presenting asupplication to his Majesty?"
"Most true, my lord," replied the king's cook. "I had like to have comeby mischief in the job; for Richie, who was always wilful, 'wadna beguided by me,' as the sang says. But nobody amongst these brave Englishcooks can kittle up his Majesty's most sacred palate with our own gustyScottish dishes. So I e'en betook myself to my craft, and concocted amess of friar's chicken for the soup, and a savoury hachis, that madethe whole cabal coup the crans; and, instead of disgrace, I cameby preferment. I am one of the clerks of the kitchen now, make methankful--with a finger in the purveyor's office, and may get my wholehand in by and by."
"I am truly glad," said Nigel, "to hear that you have not suffered on myaccount,--still more so at your good fortune."
"You bear a kind heart, my lord," said Linklater, "and do not forgetpoor people; and, troth, I see not why they should be forgotten, sincethe king's errand may sometimes fall in the cadger's gate. I havefollowed your lordship in the street, just to look at such a statelyshoot of the old oak-tree; and my heart jumped into my throat, when Isaw you sitting openly in the eating-house yonder, and knew there wassuch danger to your person."
"What! there are warrants against me, then?" said Nigel.
"It is even true, my lord; and there are those who are willing toblacken you as much as they can.--God forgive them, that would sacrificean honourable house for their own base ends!"
"Amen," said Nigel.
"For, say your lordship may have been a little wild, like other younggentlemen--"
"We have little time to talk of it, my friend," said Nigel. "The pointin question is, how am I to get speech of the king?"
"The king, my lord!" said Linklater in astonishment; "why, will not thatbe rushing wilfu
lly into danger?--scalding yourself, as I may say, withyour own ladle?"
"My good friend," answered Nigel, "my experience of the Court, andmy knowledge of the circumstances in which I stand, tell me, that themanliest and most direct road is, in my case, the surest and the safest.The king has both a head to apprehend what is just, and a heart to dowhat is kind."
"It is e'en true, my lord, and so we, his old servants, know," addedLinklater; "but, woe's me, if you knew how many folks make it theirdaily and nightly purpose to set his head against his heart, and hisheart against his head--to make him do hard things because they arecalled just, and unjust things because they are represented as kind.Woe's me! it is with his Sacred Majesty, and the favourites who workupon him, even according to the homely proverb that men taunt my callingwith,--'God sends good meat, but the devil sends cooks.'"
"It signifies not talking of it, my good friend," said Nigel, "I musttake my risk, my honour peremptorily demands it. They may maim me, orbeggar me, but they shall not say I fled from my accusers. My peersshall hear my vindication."
"Your peers?" exclaimed the cook--"Alack-a-day, my lord, we are not inScotland, where the nobles can bang it out bravely, were it evenwith the king himself, now and then. This mess must be cooked in theStar-Chamber, and that is an oven seven times heated, my lord;--and yet,if you are determined to see the king, I will not say but you may findsome favour, for he likes well any thing that is appealed directly tohis own wisdom, and sometimes, in the like cases, I have known him stickby his own opinion, which is always a fair one. Only mind, if you willforgive me, my lord--mind to spice high with Latin; a curn or two ofGreek would not be amiss; and, if you can bring in any thing about thejudgment of Solomon, in the original Hebrew, and season with a merryjest or so, the dish will be the more palatable.--Truly, I think, that,besides my skill in art, I owe much to the stripes of the Rector ofthe High School, who imprinted on my mind that cooking scene inthe Heautontimorumenos."
"Leaving that aside, my friend," said Lord Glenvarloch, "can you informme which way I shall most readily get to the sight and speech of theking?"
"To the sight of him readily enough," said Linklater; "he is gallopingabout these alleys, to see them strike the hart, to get him an appetitefor a nooning--and that reminds me I should be in the kitchen. To thespeech of the king you will not come so easily, unless you could eithermeet him alone, which rarely chances, or wait for him among thecrowd that go to see him alight. And now, farewell, my lord, and Godspeed!--if I could do more for you, I would offer it."
"You have done enough, perhaps, to endanger yourself," said LordGlenvarloch. "I pray you to be gone, and leave me to my fate."
The honest cook lingered, but a nearer burst of the horns apprized himthat there was no time to lose; and, acquainting Nigel that he wouldleave the postern-door on the latch to secure his retreat in thatdirection, he bade God bless him, and farewell.
In the kindness of this humble countryman, flowing partly from nationalpartiality, partly from a sense of long-remembered benefits, which hadbeen scarce thought on by those who had bestowed them, Lord Glenvarlochthought he saw the last touch of sympathy which he was to receive inthis cold and courtly region, and felt that he must now be sufficient tohimself, or be utterly lost.
He traversed more than one alley, guided by the sounds of the chase,and met several of the inferior attendants upon the king's sport, whoregarded him only as one of the spectators who were sometimes permittedto enter the Park by the concurrence of the officers about the Court.Still there was no appearance of James, or any of his principalcourtiers, and Nigel began to think whether, at the risk of incurringdisgrace similar to that which had attended the rash exploit of RichieMoniplies, he should not repair to the Palace-gate, in order to addressthe king on his return, when Fortune presented him the opportunity ofdoing so, in her own way.
He was in one of those long walks by which the Park was traversed, whenhe heard, first a distant rustling, then the rapid approach of hoofsshaking the firm earth on which he stood; then a distant halloo, warnedby which he stood up by the side of the avenue, leaving free room forthe passage of the chase. The stag, reeling, covered with foam, andblackened with sweat, his nostrils extended as he gasped for breath,made a shift to come up as far as where Nigel stood, and, withoutturning to bay, was there pulled down by two tall greyhounds of thebreed still used by the hardy deer-stalkers of the Scottish Highlands,but which has been long unknown in England. One dog struck at the buck'sthroat, another dashed his sharp nose and fangs, I might almostsay, into the animal's bowels. It would have been natural for LordGlenvarloch, himself persecuted as if by hunters, to have thought uponthe occasion like the melancholy Jacques; but habit is a strange matter,and I fear that his feelings on the occasion were rather those of thepractised huntsman than of the moralist. He had no time, however, toindulge them, for mark what befell.
A single horseman followed the chase, upon a steed so thoroughlysubjected to the rein, that it obeyed the touch of the bridle as ifit had been a mechanical impulse operating on the nicest piece ofmachinery; so that, seated deep in his demipique saddle, and so trussedup there as to make falling almost impossible, the rider, without eitherfear or hesitation, might increase or diminish the speed at which herode, which, even on the most animating occasions of the chase, seldomexceeded three-fourths of a gallop, the horse keeping his haunchesunder him, and never stretching forward beyond the managed pace ofthe academy. The security with which he chose to prosecute even thisfavourite, and, in the ordinary case, somewhat dangerous amusement, aswell as the rest of his equipage, marked King James. No attendant waswithin sight; indeed, it was often a nice strain of flattery to permitthe Sovereign to suppose he had outridden and distanced all the rest ofthe chase.
"Weel dune, Bash--weel dune, Battie!" he exclaimed as he came up. "Bythe honour of a king, ye are a credit to the Braes of Balwhither!--Haudmy horse, man," he called out to Nigel, without stopping to see to whomhe had addressed himself--"Haud my naig, and help me doun out o' thesaddle--deil ding your saul, sirrah, canna ye mak haste before theselazy smaiks come up?--haud the rein easy--dinna let him swerve--now,haud the stirrup--that will do, man, and now we are on terra firma."So saying, without casting an eye on his assistant, gentle King Jamie,unsheathing the short, sharp hanger, (_couteau de chasse_,) which wasthe only thing approaching to a sword that he could willingly endure thesight of, drew the blade with great satisfaction across the throat ofthe buck, and put an end at once to its struggles and its agonies.
Lord Glenvarloch, who knew well the silvan duty which the occasiondemanded, hung the bridle of the king's palfrey on the branch of a tree,and, kneeling duteously down, turned the slaughtered deer upon its back,and kept the _quarree_ in that position, while the king, too intent uponhis sport to observe any thing else, drew his _couteau_ down the breastof the animal, _secundum artem_; and, having made a cross cut, so as toascertain the depth of the fat upon the chest, exclaimed, in a sort ofrapture, "Three inches of white fat on the brisket!--prime--prime--asI am a crowned sinner--and deil ane o' the lazy loons in but mysell!Seven--aught--aught tines on the antlers. By G--d, a hart of aughttines, and the first of the season! Bash and Battie, blessings on theheart's-root of ye! Buss me, my bairns, buss me." The dogs accordinglyfawned upon him, licked him with bloody jaws, and soon put him in sucha state that it might have seemed treason had been doing its full workupon his anointed body. "Bide doun, with a mischief to ye--bide doun,with a wanion," cried the king, almost overturned by the obstreperouscaresses of the large stag-hounds. "But ye are just like ither folks,gie ye an inch and ye take an ell.--And wha may ye be, friend?" he said,now finding leisure to take a nearer view of Nigel, and observing whatin his first emotion of silvan delight had escaped him,--"Ye are naneof our train, man. In the name of God, what the devil are ye?"
"An unfortunate man, sire," replied Nigel.
"I dare say that," answered the king, snappishly, "or I wad have seennaething of you. My lieges keep a' their happiness to themsel
ves; butlet bowls row wrang wi' them, and I am sure to hear of it."
"And to whom else can we carry our complaints but to your Majesty, whois Heaven's vicegerent over us!" answered Nigel.
"Right, man, right--very weel spoken," said the king; "but you shouldleave Heaven's vicegerent some quiet on earth, too."
"If your Majesty will look on me," (for hitherto the king had beenso busy, first with the dogs, and then with the mystic operation of_breaking_, in vulgar phrase, cutting up the deer, that he had scarcegiven his assistant above a transient glance,) "you will see whomnecessity makes bold to avail himself of an opportunity which may neveragain occur."
King James looked; his blood left his cheek, though it continued stainedwith that of the animal which lay at his feet, he dropped the knife fromhis hand, cast behind him a faltering eye, as if he eithermeditated flight or looked out for assistance, and thenexclaimed,--"Glenvarlochides! as sure as I was christened James Stewart.Here is a bonny spot of work, and me alone, and on foot too!" he added,bustling to get upon his horse.
"Forgive me that I interrupt you, my liege," said Nigel, placing himselfbetween the king and his steed; "hear me but a moment!"
"I'll hear ye best on horseback," said the king. "I canna hear a wordon foot, man, not a word; and it is not seemly to stand cheek-for-chowlconfronting us that gate. Bide out of our gate, sir, we charge you onyour allegiance.--The deil's in them a', what can they be doing?"
"By the crown that you wear, my liege," said Nigel, "and for which myancestors have worthily fought, I conjure you to be composed, and tohear me but a moment!"
That which he asked was entirely out of the monarch's power to grant.The timidity which he showed was not the plain downright cowardice,which, like a natural impulse, compels a man to flight, and which canexcite little but pity or contempt, but a much more ludicrous, as wellas more mingled sensation. The poor king was frightened at once andangry, desirous of securing his safety, and at the same time ashamedto compromise his dignity; so that without attending to what LordGlenvarloch endeavoured to explain, he kept making at his horse, andrepeating, "We are a free king, man,--we are a free king--we will not becontrolled by a subject.--In the name of God, what keeps Steenie? And,praised be his name, they are coming--Hillo, ho--here, here--Steenie,Steenie!"
The Duke of Buckingham galloped up, followed by several courtiersand attendants of the royal chase, and commenced with his usualfamiliarity,--"I see Fortune has graced our dear dad, as usual.--Butwhat's this?"
"What is it? It is treason for what I ken," said the king; "and a' yourwyte, Steenie. Your dear dad and gossip might have been murdered, forwhat you care."
"Murdered? Secure the villain!" exclaimed the Duke. "By Heaven, it isOlifaunt himself!" A dozen of the hunters dismounted at once, lettingtheir horses run wild through the park. Some seized roughly on LordGlenvarloch, who thought it folly to offer resistance, while othersbusied themselves with the king. "Are you wounded, my liege--are youwounded?"
"Not that I ken of," said the king, in the paroxysm of his apprehension,(which, by the way, might be pardoned in one of so timorous atemper, and who, in his time, had been exposed to so many strangeattempts)--"Not that I ken of--but search him--search him. I am sure Isaw fire-arms under his cloak. I am sure I smelled powder--I am doomssure of that."
Lord Glenvarloch's cloak being stripped off, and his pistols discovered,a shout of wonder and of execration on the supposed criminal purpose,arose from the crowd now thickening every moment. Not that celebratedpistol, which, though resting on a bosom as gallant and as loyal asNigel's, spread such cause less alarm among knights and dames at a latehigh solemnity--not that very pistol caused more temporary consternationthan was so groundlessly excited by the arms which were taken from LordGlenvarloch's person; and not Mhic-Allastar-More himself could repelwith greater scorn and indignation, the insinuations that they were wornfor any sinister purposes.
"Away with the wretch--the parricide--the bloody-minded villain!" wasechoed on all hands; and the king, who naturally enough set the samevalue on his own life, at which it was, or seemed to be, rated byothers, cried out, louder than all the rest, "Ay, ay--away with him.I have had enough of him and so has the country. But do him no bodilyharm--and, for God's sake, sirs, if ye are sure ye have thoroughlydisarmed him, put up your swords, dirks, and skenes, for you willcertainly do each other a mischief."
There was a speedy sheathing of weapons at the king's command; for thosewho had hitherto been brandishing them in loyal bravado, began therebyto call to mind the extreme dislike which his Majesty nourished againstnaked steel, a foible which seemed to be as constitutional as histimidity, and was usually ascribed to the brutal murder of Rizzio havingbeen perpetrated in his unfortunate mother's presence before he yet sawthe light.
At this moment, the Prince, who had been hunting in a different partof the then extensive Park, and had received some hasty and confusedinformation of what was going forward, came rapidly up, with one or twonoblemen in his train, and amongst others Lord Dalgarno. He sprung fromhis horse and asked eagerly if his father were wounded.
"Not that I am sensible of, Baby Charles--but a wee matter exhausted,with struggling single-handed with the assassin.--Steenie, fill up a cupof wine--the leathern bottle is hanging at our pommel.--Buss me, then,Baby Charles," continued the monarch, after he had taken this cup ofcomfort; "O man, the Commonwealth and you have had a fair escape fromthe heavy and bloody loss of a dear father; for we are _pater patriae_,as weel as _pater familias_.-_Quis desiderio sit pudor aut modus tarncari capitis!_-Woe is me, black cloth would have been dear in England,and dry een scarce!"
And, at the very idea of the general grief which must have attended hisdeath, the good-natured monarch cried heartily himself.
"Is this possible?" said Charles, sternly; for his pride was hurt athis father's demeanour on the one hand, while on the other, he felt theresentment of a son and a subject, at the supposed attempt on theking's life. "Let some one speak who has seen what happened--My Lord ofBuckingham!"
"I cannot say my lord," replied the Duke, "that I saw any actualviolence offered to his Majesty, else I should have avenged him on thespot."
"You would have done wrong, then, in your zeal, George," answered thePrince; "such offenders were better left to be dealt with by the laws.But was the villain not struggling with his Majesty?"
"I cannot term it so, my lord," said the Duke, who, with many faults,would have disdained an untruth; "he seemed to desire to detain hisMajesty, who, on the contrary, appeared to wish to mount his horse; butthey have found pistols on his person, contrary to the proclamation,and, as it proves to be by Nigel Olifaunt, of whose ungoverneddisposition your Royal Highness has seen some samples, we seem to bejustified in apprehending the worst."
"Nigel Olifaunt!" said the Prince; "can that unhappy man so soon haveengaged in a new trespass? Let me see those pistols."
"Ye are not so unwise as to meddle with such snap-haunces, BabyCharles?" said James--"Do not give him them, Steenie--I command youon your allegiance! They may go off of their own accord, whilk oftenbefalls.--You will do it, then?--Saw ever a man sic wilful bairns as weare cumbered with!--Havena we guardsmen and soldiers enow, but you mustunload the weapons yoursell--you, the heir of our body and dignities,and sae mony men around that are paid for venturing life in our cause?"
But without regarding his father's exclamations, Prince Charles, withthe obstinacy which characterised him in trifles, as well as matters ofconsequence, persisted in unloading the pistols with his own hand, ofthe double bullets with which each was charged. The hands of all aroundwere held up in astonishment at the horror of the crime supposed to havebeen intended, and the escape which was presumed so narrow.
Nigel had not yet spoken a word--he now calmly desired to be heard.
"To what purpose?" answered the Prince coldly. "You knew yourselfaccused of a heavy offence, and, instead of rendering yourself up tojustice, in terms of the proclamation, you are here found intrudingyourself on h
is Majesty's presence, and armed with unlawful weapons."
"May it please you, sir," answered Nigel, "I wore these unhappy weaponsfor my own defence; and not very many hours since they were necessary toprotect the lives of others."
"Doubtless, my lord," answered the Prince, still calm andunmoved,--"your late mode of life, and the associates with whom you havelived, have made you familiar with scenes and weapons of violence. Butit is not to me you are to plead your cause."
"Hear me--hear me, noble Prince!" said Nigel, eagerly. "Hear me!You--even you yourself--may one day ask to be heard, and in vain."
"How, sir," said the Prince, haughtily--"how am I to construe that, mylord?"
"If not on earth, sir," replied the prisoner, "yet to Heaven we must allpray for patient and favourable audience."
"True, my lord," said the Prince, bending his head with haughtyacquiescence; "nor would I now refuse such audience to you, could itavail you. But you shall suffer no wrong. We will ourselves look intoyour case."
"Ay, ay," answered the king, "he hath made _appellatio ad Casarem_--wewill interrogate Glenvarlochides ourselves, time and place fitting; and,in the meanwhile, have him and his weapons away, for I am weary of thesight of them."
In consequence of directions hastily given, Nigel was accordinglyremoved from the presence, where, however, his words had not altogetherfallen to the ground. "This is a most strange matter, George," saidthe Prince to the favourite; "this gentleman hath a good countenance, ahappy presence, and much calm firmness in his look and speech. I cannotthink he would attempt a crime so desperate and useless."
"I profess neither love nor favour to the young man," answeredBuckingham, whose high-spirited ambition bore always an open character:"but I cannot but agree with your Highness, that our dear gossip hathbeen something hasty in apprehending personal danger from him."
"By my saul, Steenie, ye are not blate, to say so!" said the king. "Do Inot ken the smell of pouther, think ye? Who else nosed out the Fifth ofNovember, save our royal selves? Cecil, and Suffolk, and all of them,were at fault, like sae mony mongrel tikes, when I puzzled it out:and trow ye that I cannot smell pouther? Why, 'sblood, man, JoannesBarclaius thought my ingine was in some measure inspiration, and termshis history of the plot, Series patefacti divinitus parricidii; andSpondanus, in like manner, saith of us, Divinitus evasit."
"The land was happy in your Majesty's escape," said the Duke ofBuckingham, "and not less in the quick wit which tracked that labyrinthof treason by so fine and almost invisible a clew."
"Saul, man, Steenie, ye are right! There are few youths have sic truejudgment as you, respecting the wisdom of their elders; and, as for thisfause, traitorous smaik, I doubt he is a hawk of the same nest. Saw yenot something papistical about him? Let them look that he bears not acrucifix, or some sic Roman trinket, about him."
"It would ill become me to attempt the exculpation of this unhappy man,"said Lord Dalgarno, "considering the height of his present attempt,which has made all true men's blood curdle in their veins. Yet I cannotavoid intimating, with all due submission to his Majesty's infalliblejudgment, in justice to one who showed himself formerly only my enemy,though he now displays himself in much blacker colours, that thisOlifaunt always appeared to me more as a Puritan than as a Papist."
"Ah, Dalgarno, art thou there, man?" said the king. "And ye behoved tokeep back, too, and leave us to our own natural strength and the care ofProvidence, when we were in grips with the villain!"
"Providence, may it please your most Gracious Majesty, would not failto aid, in such a strait, the care of three weeping kingdoms," said LordDalgarno.
"Surely, man--surely," replied the king--"but a sight of your father,with his long whinyard, would have been a blithe matter a short whilesyne; and in future we will aid the ends of Providence in our favour,by keeping near us two stout beef-eaters of the guard.--And so thisOlifaunt is a Puritan?--not the less like to be a Papist, for allthat--for extremities meet, as the scholiast proveth. There are, as Ihave proved in my book, Puritans of papistical principles--it is just anew tout on an old horn."
Here the king was reminded by the Prince, who dreaded perhaps that hewas going to recite the whole Basilicon Doron, that it would be best tomove towards the Palace, and consider what was to be done for satisfyingthe public mind, in whom the morning's adventure was likely to excitemuch speculation. As they entered the gate of the Palace, a female bowedand presented a paper, which the king received, and, with a sortof groan, thrust it into his side pocket. The Prince expressed somecuriosity to know its contents. "The valet in waiting will tell youthem," said the king, "when I strip off my cassock. D'ye think, Baby,that I can read all that is thrust into my hands? See to me, man"--(hepointed to the pockets of his great trunk breeches, which were stuffedwith papers)--"We are like an ass--that we should so speak--stoopingbetwixt two burdens. Ay, ay, Asinus fortis accumbens inter terminos, asthe Vulgate hath it--Ay, ay, Vidi terrain quod esset optima, et supposuihumerum ad portandum, et factus sum tributis serviens--I saw this landof England, and became an overburdened king thereof."
"You are indeed well loaded, my dear dad and gossip," said the Duke ofBuckingham, receiving the papers which King James emptied out of hispockets.
"Ay, ay," continued the monarch; "take them to you per aversionem,bairns--the one pouch stuffed with petitions, t'other with pasquinadoes;a fine time we have on't. On my conscience, I believe the tale of Cadmuswas hieroglyphical, and that the dragon's teeth whilk he sowed werethe letters he invented. Ye are laughing, Baby Charles?--Mind what Isay.--When I came here first frae our ain country, where the men areas rude as the weather, by my conscience, England was a bieldy bit;one would have thought the king had little to do but to walk by quietwaters, per aquam refectionis. But, I kenna how or why, the place issair changed--read that libel upon us and on our regimen. The dragon'steeth are sown, Baby Charles; I pray God they bearna their armed harvestin your day, if I suld not live to see it. God forbid I should, forthere will be an awful day's kemping at the shearing of them."
"I shall know how to stifle the crop in the blade,--ha, George?" saidthe Prince, turning to the favourite with a look expressive of somecontempt for his father's apprehensions, and full of confidence in thesuperior firmness and decision of his own counsels.
While this discourse was passing, Nigel, in charge of apursuivant-at-arms, was pushed and dragged through the small town, allthe inhabitants of which, having been alarmed by the report of an attackon the king's life, now pressed forward to see the supposed traitor.Amid the confusion of the moment, he could descry the face of thevictualler, arrested into a stare of stolid wonder, and that of thebarber grinning betwixt horror and eager curiosity. He thought that healso had a glimpse of his waterman in the green jacket.
He had no time for remarks, being placed in a boat with the pursuivantand two yeomen of the guard, and rowed up the river as fast as thearms of six stout watermen could pull against the tide. They passedthe groves of masts which even then astonished the stranger with theextended commerce of London, and now approached those low and blackenedwalls of curtain and bastion, which exhibit here and there a piece ofordnance, and here and there a solitary sentinel under arms, but haveotherwise so little of the military terrors of a citadel. A projectinglow-browed arch, which had loured over many an innocent, and many aguilty head, in similar circumstances, now spread its dark frowns overthat of Nigel. The boat was put close up to the broad steps againstwhich the tide was lapping its lazy wave. The warder on duty looked fromthe wicket, and spoke to the pursuivant in whispers. In a few minutesthe Lieutenant of the Tower appeared, received, and granted anacknowledgment for the body of Nigel, Lord Glenvarloch.