nervously onto the set under the direction of the stage manager. He makes his way up to the white oak desk, and gives Sheldon’s hand a powerful shake before sitting in the tall, black padded chair.
“How are you this evening, my friend?” Sheldon asks.
“I’m doing okay,” Rory says with a shaky, nervous smile.
From their high definition television at home, Kelly is watching her boyfriend with a look of support and anxiety, biting her lower lip as she stares at the screen.
“I would assume so,” Sheldon begins, putting his palms playfully on the oak desk, “it doesn’t sound like you’re able to catch anything. I mean,” Sheldon holds up a finger each time he announces something that Rory’s blood can cure, “you don’t fear: AIDS, Hepatitis, Leukemia, Lymphoma, Rihanna.”
“Yeah, I’m pretty sure I could handle all of those,” Rory replies with a confident smile.
On the sofa at home, Kelly closes her eyes for a moment of embarrassment, and then opens them again. “Oh, babe, let your penis do the walking, but please don’t let it do the talking.”
“So just to be clear on our facts,” Sheldon begins, picking up a blue 3X5 card and reading from it verbatim. “A 100 milliliter transfusion of your blood can cure: HIV, AIDS, Hepatitis, and Leukemia; all with an 80% or better success rate?”
“Yes, that’s correct,” Rory replies, swallowing hard as these details are discussed.
“Also, a 500 milliliter transfusion of your blood can cure lymphoma cases with an 80% success rate?” The host asks with a serious game face.
“Yeah, that’s right,” Rory agrees quickly, letting his left arm relax on the desk and looking past the camera for a moment at the various types of people in the studio audience.
“So, Rory, that is amazing, but I wanted to get back to the beginning of this incredible story,” Sheldon boasts, building up the emotion and twisting his head back and forth under the ambient lighting of the set. “What made you decide to start giving blood in the first place?”
“Well, my Father had a stroke about ten years ago, and he was treated at Ronald Reagan UCLA Medical Center, and that treatment saved his life... for another ten years. Anyway, I work with people all day who are performing extreme sports and we sometimes have to rush people to the ER, so I thought it would be a good idea to donate blood regularly to the hospital that saved my Father’s life.”
“That is a fantastic story, and I’m glad the hospital gave you another ten years with your father. It sounds like your heart is in the right place.”
“Well my mother used to tell me I had a heart of gold; I guess, in a funny way, she was right.”
“Very nice,” Sheldon replies quickly, keeping control of the interview, “we were hoping you could help the audience and I to understand how this whole process works?”
“Well, the doctors first explained it to me like the game of checkers where you have the fox and the geese.” Rory says, using his hands to emphasize his point.
“Okay,” Sheldon nods with a sober expression, urging him to continue.
“The fox is like the HIV Virus, trying to get to the other side of the board while the geese try to stop him. In most people’s bodies the geese cannot stop the fox before he gets to the other side of the board. Each time an HIV cell grows and invades a healthy T-Cell, it’s a win for the foxes. When my blood is injected into the body, all of the geese are replaced by stronger geese and the fox can’t get past them anymore.”
“The fox can’t get past them because he moves slower… or because there are more of the geese now?” Sheldon asks with a smirk, enjoying the analogy.
“No, he can’t get past them at all is how it was explained to me; the geese are too strong, and eventually they kill him.”
“Wow, that is a golden heart, I guess we should call you The Golden Goose?”
The audience applauds, and a broad grin spreads across Sheldon’s face, showing his opportunistic side. Rory simply nods with a half-smile; clearly not crazy about the new name.
“In fact, I think you’re The Golden Goose of Los Angeles.”
Sheldon gets another spirited round of cheers from the audience and he smiles with approval, as if Rory were just knighted by royalty before a crowd of political talk show peasants.
“Well, we’ve seen a lot of good news coming from the hospital,” Sheldon continues with a serious expression, “but, as I’m sure you’re aware, there has been a bit of a scandal developing?”
“No, I wasn’t aware of a scandal,” Rory says with a blank stare, looking around a bit, and appearing confused.
“Well, we had requested Raul Vasquez to join us on the show this evening, but the family sent over a prepared statement from their attorney. This is what they had to say,” Sheldon announces, reading from a page that he lifts from the left side of his desk. “We were deeply saddened to learn that the UCLA Medical Center could have saved our little nine-year-old Maria’s life, but neglected to do so. She was being treated for leukemia at the hospital during the same time that the hospital was conducting trials for the new cure. It was painful enough to bury our little girl two months ago after her terrible battle with cancer, but it was more painful to learn that someone had the power to save her, and did nothing… We are ashamed of the UCLA Medical Center for not attempting to save her life, and are filing a discrimination lawsuit against the hospital. This is based on evidence in the case study which shows that most of those cured in the past six months have been wealthy Caucasians.”
“That can’t be true,” Rory declares, shaking his head with disgust.
“It actually is true…” Sheldon says slowly, pulling up the side of his mouth with discomfort as if he is expecting to be stabbed. “We have independently confirmed the coroner’s report, and the little girl was at the hospital during that time-“
“Maybe they couldn’t cure that form of leukemia,” Rory asserts, not wanting to believe him.
“Actually, the same day that little Maria Vasquez was buried; the case study reports that a Senator Henri Edwards was cured of lymphoma, having received 500 milliliters, or one pint of your blood. Now, you may not be aware, but Senator Edwards is a Texas oil billionaire in his fifties…”
“That can’t be true, I don’t believe it,” Rory repeats as he puts his hand on his forehead and looks at the floor with an expression of shock and disgust.
“We do have a statement from the hospital,” Sheldon begins with a deliberate smile. “Our hearts go out to those who have lost loved ones during these medical trials. Unfortunately, some patients were in too much of a weakened state for us to try an experimental cure. Patients were chosen based solely on the following factors: a racial profile consistent with the donor blood, a strong potential for improvement, and being of legal age to sign the necessary waivers for the hospital to use the experimental treatment. We deeply regret that there was not enough of Mr. Chamber’s blood to run trials on all patients which is why we need funding to develop this cure in larger volumes. Our dedicated hospital staff fought hard to save the life of Maria Vasquez and will donate an undisclosed sum of money to a charity in her name.”
“I didn’t know-“
“That’s okay, Rory,” Sheldon responds decisively, with a reassuring smile, “we know that you saved the lives of over fifty people, and they a
re people who would not have had any other chance to survive. That is a phenomenal success story!”
The studio audience cheers and claps with feverish energy and emotion.
“Now, here is another amazing fact that has come out of this whole story,” Sheldon exclaims, building up his voice slowly. “After your press conference, some Harvard College Graduates posted a website poll on the Internet asking how much people would be willing to pay for your blood to be free of their illness. Within a few hours, that poll went viral, and just before the show, a pint of your blood was valued at over $500,000! In fact, most of those who commented said they would be willing to mortgage their home to be free of their illness. Isn’t it amazing how badly we’ve needed this cure?” Sheldon asks with patriotic smile.
“Yeah, that’s amazing.” Rory mumbles with a lower tone of voice, staring off into the distance as this new information presents itself.
“Well, Rory, we appreciate your coming on the show,” Sheldon says with a sincere smile, “and we had offered $100,000 for you to give us an exclusive interview tonight, but Corba Strong of the Ronald Reagan UCLA Medical Center said that you turned down the money.”
Rory looks at Sheldon with mistrustful eyes, fixing his gaze on the man and listening closely to every syllable as if it were the terms and conditions of an arranged marriage initiated by a corporation.
“Ms. Strong told us that you wanted to personally give the money to the family of Maria Vasquez to help ease the passing of their daughter, and to let them know how sorry everyone is that nothing else could have been done to save her.”
From the corner of the set, a young man approaches Sheldon and hands him a large, white envelope.
“Rory,