At some point Alain fell asleep from tiredness, waking when it was nearing sunset, Mari still stood nearby on guard, arms crossed, looking down as she heard him move. “The camp is almost ready. I think we’ll have a fire and something to eat before long.”
Alain tried to struggle to his feet, finding it unexpectedly hard. Her hand reached out and he took it without thinking, accepting her help and feeling a great sense of comfort in her touch. When he had first met her, Alain had not even remembered what “help” meant, had forgotten the very idea of offering aid to another. She had countered his long and bitter years as an acolyte, countless harsh lessons. He still could not understand how Mari had done it. “All is well?” he asked her.
“Yep.” She gave him a smile, as if sensing his feelings. “Though my feet are starting to hurt now,” Mari added, “and my butt still hurts, too, so it looks like I can’t win. We’ve gotten quite a few looks from commons.” Mari seemed amused by that. “What do you suppose they’re thinking right now?”
“I cannot imagine.” Alain let out a sigh of his own before he could block it. “I was taught the thoughts of others did not matter, so I am not accustomed to considering what their thoughts might be.”
“That doesn’t mean you can’t change, Alain.”
“I have already changed a great deal.” Alain tried another smile.
She reached out both hands, using her forefingers to push the corners of Alain’s lips upward. “Like that. And I disagree, Sir Mage. You were always like this inside. You’re just letting it show now.” Mari blew out a long breath, looking upward at the peaks around the pass, her expression pensive. “No. You haven’t changed. But other things have to change.”
“You will make that happen. You will stop the storm.”
Mari gave him a questioning frown. “That’s the same sort of thing you said before we parted in Dorcastle. What . . . We’ll talk about it later. Here comes your General.”
Flyn strode up and bowed. “We have a site prepared for you, Lady Mechanic, in that direction, and one for you, Sir Mage, over there.”
Mari’s frown deepened. “Two locations? I asked for one.”
The general just watched her for a long moment. “One camp. For the two of you?”
“Is that so hard to understand?” Mari demanded.
“Yes, Lady, it is. I am sorry I misunderstood, but surely you realize why I assumed that you and the Mage wished to sleep apart rather than together.” A moment later the general flushed as he realized the other possible meaning to what he had said.
Mari’s face darkened as well, but she kept her voice level. “We’re not exactly sleeping together, General, not that it would be anyone’s business but ours if we were.”
“My pardon, Lady Mechanic, I did not mean to imply otherwise.”
Mari eyed him for a long moment. “Do you respect me, General?”
Flyn nodded. “Yes, Lady. Anyone who has slain two dragons has earned my respect, even apart from the other services you have rendered us. I truly did not mean to imply anything. But I admit that I don’t know how to handle you.”
“I tend to do that to people.”
“If your question is, do I still respect you because you don’t act like every other Mechanic that I’ve encountered, then the answer is still yes. Indeed, I respect you the more because you treat me with courtesy.”
“Thank you, General.” Mari frowned toward the main camp. “Do you have any broken Mechanic equipment?”
The general took a moment to think. “We have a couple of Mechanic rifles which no longer work. They are all that remain to us.“
“Bring them to me once we’re settled. I’ll see if I can fix them with what I have.”
Flyn nodded again, studying her. “Am I still prohibited from asking that question?”
Mari smiled. “Yes. But I’ll answer it anyway. No charge. This Mage’s life is worth a great deal to me, and it seems I owe that life to you.”
Instead of replying, Flyn smiled, shook his head, and left.
“I believe that you have rendered the general speechless,” Alain observed.
“I’m sure it’s just temporary,” Mari said. “I can use the distraction of working, Alain, and it’s been awhile since I’ve been able to fix something. Do you get a little restless if you haven’t worked spells for a while?”
Alain thought about that. “I do not know. If so, I have always tried to repress it, like every other feeling.”
Mari looked at him, her face somber, then away. “I never know what to say when you say things like that.”
“You have said the things which showed me that another road existed, a road that I could follow,” Alain said.
One corner of her mouth rose in a lopsided smile. “I guess we’re even. You certainly helped put me on a road I never expected to follow.”
A short time later Flyn returned to escort them both to a small depression sheltered by boulders on two sides, a fire already blazing in the center. Two soldiers with him tentatively offered Mari the Mechanic weapons they were holding, but she took them without comment, pursing her lips as she examined each quickly. “This one has a broken lever action. I can’t do anything about that. You need a replacement part. But the other one just has a jam in the spent cartridge ejector. That’s easy to fix.”
Alain watched as Mari knelt, placing the Mechanic weapon on the ground and pulling out some of the metal devices she called tools. Within moments she had removed pieces from the apparently solid weapon and was prying at something, eventually giving a sigh of satisfaction and holding up a bright object. By the time soldiers returned with some food, Mari had the weapon back in one piece. “I’ll trade you,” she suggested dryly as one soldier offered her a tin cup filled with thin stew.
“Thank you, Lady Mechanic. Is there anything else?” The soldier took the weapon, once again uncertain.
“No,” she assured him. “Thanks for the food.”
The soldier stared in amazement at receiving courtesy from a Mechanic, then bowed toward her. He left with an occasional glance back at Mari, who was drinking the hot stew slowly.
“Mari,” Alain said, “is it wise to act in such a way with commons?”
“I want to see how they react, Alain.” Mari looked at him over her cup. “One of the things my Guild taught was that the commons had to fear Mechanics in order to respect us. I’m trying to see what happens if I treat commons differently.”
“I know you must add commons to your allies, but such behavior may cause them to suspect who you are.”
She lowered her brow at him. “And just who am I?”
“You said you did not wish to speak of it,” Alain reminded her.
“Our relationship is no one’s business but our own, Alain. People are going to gossip regardless, but I don’t think any commons will guess what is really going on between us.” She settled into a sitting position, wincing. “Oh, my poor rear end. I hope you appreciate what I went through to get here.”
Alain watched her anxiously. “You have hurt your…”
“My butt. Yeah.” She returned his gaze, puzzled. “I’ll survive. Why are you blushing?”
“Blushing?” His face felt warm. What did that mean?
“Yes.“ Mari laughed. “Does talking about my butt embarrass you? I’m sorry. It’s nothing special.”
“I…” His face felt even warmer. “I think it is.”
“You do, huh? Where have you been all my life?”
This time he gave her a mystified look. “I spent almost all of it inside a Mage Guild Hall. The one in Ihris. You know this.”
Mari laughed again. He had forgotten how good it felt to hear her laughter. “That’s called a rhetorical question, Alain. That means you’re not really expected to offer a literal answer.”
“Is it like your sarcasm?”
“It can be.” She leaned back against the nearest rock. “Where were we before we started talking about my butt? Oh, yeah. I’ve spent a lot of time r
ecently among commons while hiding from my Guild. They’re not stupid. Well, most of them aren’t stupid. It made me realize that just about everything I know about commons is stuff I was told by my Guild superiors. How much of it is true? I want to find out for myself. Especially considering the things we speculated about in Dorcastle, that the world is headed fast for a big smash. I wanted a better grasp of what commons were thinking.”
She gave him a sidelong look. “It’s like learning about Mages. Some of what I was taught is true. I wouldn’t trust another Mage than you. But a lot of what I was taught was false, so I’m experimenting and gathering more information. I suppose studying something that way doesn’t make any sense to you, though, because of your Mage training.”
Alain tried his own stew as he thought about her words. After being trained to pay no attention to the food he ate, Alain had begun trying to taste it again, one more effect of having spent time with Mari. In this case, though, the best that could be said of the meager rations were that they would stave off hunger. “It does make some sense, because it is acceptable for a Mage to learn about aspects of the world illusion. To manipulate the illusion, a Mage must be able to see it. That is how I justified my own time studying history and the world: to be better able to grasp what I had to ignore.”
“I’ve been around a Mage too long. That actually sounded reasonable.”
Alain gazed at her. “Your idea is an interesting one. You help me see things I never see on my own.”
Her smile shone white in the growing dark. “I love it when you say things like that, because I know you really mean them. You never learned the silly games most men learn growing up.” Dusk was falling rapidly as the sun sank farther behind the mountains. Mari sat looking at him, light and shadow rippling across her face as the fire flickered to one side of them. “Alain,” she asked in a suddenly tense voice, “can anybody see us right now?”
He looked about carefully, seeing his view blocked by the boulders around them. “I do not think so, as long as we are sitting.”
“Good. Put down your cup. Over there a bit.”
Alain did so, wondering why he had to put down the cup and why it had to be a little distance from him.
Mari sat down her own cup a long arm’s reach distance from herself, then lunged forward, wrapping her arms about him as her lips sought his.
Alain had never imagined anything like this. No wonder the elders warned both male and female acolytes against kissing. All wisdom would crumble in the face of such a feeling.
Her hands ran down his back, her body pressed against him, and as the kiss went on and on he heard Mari gasp and then sigh softly. His own hands caressed her, touching lightly, then pulling her hard to him.
But then Mari finally broke the kiss, pushing backward to separate them, breathing heavily. “I’ve been wanting to do that so bad. But that’s enough. We have to stop.”
“But—”
“No more, Alain.”
He would have argued further, but then looked into her eyes, startled by what he saw there. Passion, he guessed, but also something he easily recognized. “You fear me?”
Perhaps his dismay could be heard in his voice, because Mari quickly shook her head. “No! I’m not afraid of you.”
“I could see it,” Alain said, his voice low. “Fear was in your eyes. I do not want to ever cause you to feel fear. But I am a Mage, and I know how others fear Mages.”
Mari cringed, then reached out to grasp his hand. “No! That’s not it. I don’t look at you and see a Mage. Not that way, anyway. What you saw wasn’t fear of you. I swear it. I was afraid of…myself.”
“Yourself?”
“Yes.” She sat back, running her free hand through hair tousled by their encounter. “I’ve really missed you, and…well, there’s been some physical longing there, too. Wanting to hold you and…all that. But when I finally had you in my arms and we were kissing and touching and…let’s not go there again right now. Anyway, it surprised me how much I wanted you. That’s all.”
Alain could see some deception in her, but did not want to accuse Mari of lying. “I did not see surprise,” he finally said.
She flinched again, looking away. “All right. It scared me. It scared me how badly I wanted you. It was so hard to stop myself, and it would have been so easy to just surrender to it. To surrender myself to you. I’ve never felt that before. There have been plenty of men who have tried to pressure me or charm me into bed, but I never had any trouble resisting that kind of thing. Not until just now, when all my defenses and my smarts dissolved into a hot flame. And it scared me, even though I still want you. But we can’t, Alain. We’re not promised yet. And…and I can’t afford to take any risk of getting pregnant.”
His mind fixed on one word. “Pregnant?”
“Yes. Not…not when I’m running for my life.”
There was something else. He could tell that Mari was not saying everything. There was at least one other reason left unspoken. But even if Alain had been inclined to press her, he could not because of the strange paralysis that seemed to have gripped him.
“Alain?” Mari peered at him, worried. “What’s the matter?”
His voice began to work again, but only haltingly. “You…children…me…”
“I don’t—” She looked away, then back at him. “Maybe. I don’t know. If there was anyone, it would be— Look, I’m not ready to talk about a family. All right?“
“A…family?” Where for long years a narrow, solitary path had loomed before him, now a wide plain seemed to stretch, uncounted possibilities awaiting depending on the steps he chose. Alain blinked at Mari, amazed by the change her words had wrought. “It does not happen to Mages. We do not have family. Only the Guild. But now…could this happen? With…with you?”
Mari blinked too, then wiped away tears. “Maybe. I really can’t talk about it now. We shouldn’t even be thinking about it. I mean, how long have we known each other? And we’re in danger of our lives and fighting dragons and stuff and…have you known any other girls, Alain?”
He nodded, trying to keep up with Mari as she jumped from topic to topic. “Acolytes.”
“I don’t mean, did you know them,” Mari said, sounding awkward. “I mean, have you known them.”
“I do not understand.”
“Never mind. I don’t want to know. I don’t want to know how many or anything else. Understand? You say things that other people wouldn’t say. Don’t tell me that.”
Alain stared at her. “Do not tell you what?”
“Forget it.” Mari ran both of her hands through her hair this time. “Can we talk about something else now?”
He felt confused again. “But you—”
“Something else, Alain. Get your mind off my body.”
“My mind was not there before,” he objected.
She laughed. “Oh, sure. I saw how you were looking at me. I know a look of male lust when I see one aimed in my direction, even though yours is the first look like that I’ve welcomed.”
“Perhaps you are right,” Alain admitted.
Mari grinned this time, her mood shift startling him. “I always wanted a boyfriend who would tell me that I was right as often as you do.”
Alain tried to think straight again. “What is it we must speak of?”
Her smile went away. Mari settled back against the boulder behind her again, looking outward. “I wasn’t sure I’d find you and be able to tell you again that I loved you before they caught me. It’s weird, but I spent more time worrying about not ever being able to say ‘I love you’ to you again than I did worrying about dying.”
“Dying?”
“Yeah. My Guild must know. They’re trying to kill me.”
Chapter Five
Alain’s heart seemed to pause in its beating. “Who is trying to kill you? Your Guild?”
“At least my Guild. Maybe others,” Mari said. “Dark Mechanics, Senior Mechanics, Mages, maybe Dark Mages, too. I can’t tell the d
ifference between regular Mages and Dark Mages like you can. As far as I know, none of the commons are after me, but that’s probably just a matter of time.” Her tone seemed light on the surface, but he could sense the tension under it, the worry.
“You believe that your Guild has learned about you?” Alain asked, wondering how the Mechanics Guild could have discovered that Mari was the daughter of the prophecy, fated to overthrow the Great Guilds if she lived.
“Well, they haven’t sent a dragon to kill me, but they’ve tried a lot of other things,” Mari said.
That reminded Alain of something else. “What did you kill the dragon with? I have never heard of a dragon being slain by a single blow.”
She grinned. “A shoulder-fired, fin-stabilized rocket with a shaped-charge warhead. There are only two in the world, and I have them. Or had them. There’s one left now. You have Alli to thank for those weapons. Lady Mechanic Alli, that is. She was a friend of mine when we were apprentices. Alli has always been interested in how to make better weapons and bigger explosions.”
“This Mechanic Alli must be highly regarded within your Guild if she alone can make such weapons.”
Mari laughed sharply. “No. She’s in trouble with my Guild, even though Alli was careful. She found authorized texts describing each component of her weapon—the propulsion, the stabilizing fins, the warhead—and then she combined them into those two prototypes. After which she told the Guild, assuming in her youthful innocence that the Guild would be thrilled to have a weapon for sale that could punch holes in walls and anything with thick armor. Instead, the Guild decreed it to be a new weapon, and since independent innovation is strictly prohibited, the Guild reprimanded her most severely, told her never to build another one and to dispose of those two.”
Alain looked toward where the dragon’s carcass still lay. “But she did not do as your Guild ordered?”
Mari looked guilty. “I talked her into giving them to me. I said, ‘Alli, the Guild said to dispose of them. Dispose means for you to get rid of them. If you give them to me, you’ve disposed of them.’ Alli wasn’t too sure that was a good idea, but she was angry enough at her Guild superiors that she decided to follow the letter of her orders.” Mari shrugged in an unsuccessful attempt to make her words seem casual. “Hopefully my Guild won’t find out what I did with one of the weapons, but how can they complain? According to them, dragons aren’t real.”