They both had a pile of sins a mile long, things they could never take back, could never atone for. They were both as hard as steel on the outside and sad and needy on the inside. The only difference between them was fata had tits and he didn’t. No, scratch that. Fata didn’t have any tits. Just puffy nipples.
“You can’t do this!”
Startled out of his pity party he glanced up to find Becki stalking across camp, Nico not far behind her.
“You’re unclaimed and well over the age of thirteen!” Nico bellowed, quickly closing the distance between them. “It’s within my rights to take you whether you want me or not!”
Oh, damn. Nico was pulling old school law out of that chauvinistic Romani pocket of his.
Hearing that, Becki had stopped dead and spun around to face him. “That only applies to marriage, Nico Čonka!” she sputtered, pointing an accusatory finger. “Not casual sex!”
“What the fuck, Becki! Do you actually think I’d force you to have sex with me? I am talking about marriage! First you’re going to marry me and then I’m going to force you to have sex with me!”
“I…what? No! We can’t get married! I’m pregnant!”
He snorted. Well, duh. Her enormous belly was proof enough of that.
Nico laughed. “Yeah, I’m aware.” He placed his hand on the top of her giant baby bump and smirked. “Very aware. And I don’t care. I’m taking you both.”
“No! You can’t—”
He grabbed her and pulled her up against him. Pushing her hair out of her eyes, he stared down at her. “I can.”
“No!” she cried. “I can’t go through losing another man!”
Shit. Poor Becki. First Tobar knocks her up then stiffs her. Then Hockey forces her into marriage only to go and die on her. Now, Nico was pushing himself on her. No doubt it was much too fast for her, but Nico wasn’t the type to stand idly by and wait for something or someone he wanted.
Frate was a lot like him. If they couldn’t afford it, they stole it. If it didn’t exist, they made it. And once they found the woman they loved, they married her.
“You’re not going to lose me,” he growled. “I’m not gonna go anywhere without you. Not ever. You’re mine, Becki Bálan-Sava, soon to be Bálan-Sava-Čonka, whether you want me or not. You’ve been mine since the first time you let me inside that beautiful body of yours.”
Man. He should just follow these two around all day. They were way more entertaining than television ever was.
“And what about Mags?” she hissed.
Nico frowned, looking confused. “What about her?”
Screeching in frustration, Becki stomped on Nico’s boot. He let her go, hopping on one foot, cursing loudly.
“God dammit, woman! I’ve already told you a hundred times I’m never touching her again!”
She huffed. “I don’t believe you and, to be honest, I’m not actually sure I even like you. Barring being good at sex, I see no redeeming qualities in you! Therefore, I’m not going to marry you!” She turned away with a huff.
Ooooh, shit. That was not going to go over well. Not with someone as prideful as Nico.
His fury obvious, Nico grabbed her upper arms and yanked her back. Wrapping his arms across her chest, he crushed her against him, her back to his stomach.
“Woman,” he growled. “I’m done with your crazy bullshit. If you liked me enough to fuck me, then you can damn well like me enough to be my wife. When it comes to you, fată, my cock and I are a packaged deal.”
She twisted in his arms. “They never used to be!”
Tipping her backwards, with one arm under her knees, Nico scooped her up and held her like a baby.
“It’s time to get married, Becki. If only because I’ll be allowed to spank you when you talk back to me!”
“Put me down! NOW!”
Ignoring her and seemingly oblivious to her flailing limbs, Nico started walking.
“Xan!” Becki cried out. “Help me!”
Nope. No way in hell he was getting between a man and the woman he loved. And Nico, sure as shit smells, loved Becki. No man would willingly put himself through the sort of bittersweet torture only women knew how to give unless he loved her.
“Sorry surioară,” He called out. “You know it’s against the law for me to interfere once a fată’s been claimed.”
Nico grinned at him and, unable to contain it because frate just looked so damn happy, he grinned back. He knew that feeling, remembered it well. And he would give any number of body parts to feel it again. To have Trinity back. Except maybe the parts she had liked best. You know…like his hair…and some choice organs.
Goddamn. To once again be able to look across camp at his beautiful wife, wanting her so damn bad he would have bled just to be inside of her.
“You stupid caveman!” Becki screamed. “You’re all cavemen and I’m not going to marry you!”
Nico burst out laughing. “Baby, it’s not as if I’m giving you a choice. So save those screams of yours for the hot, sweaty sex we’re about to have.”
He choked on his laughter. That was way more information than he had needed.
As the happy couple passed by the Asenov’s trailer, Kizzy, outside shoveling snow away from the tires, smiled at them.
“Congratulations!” she yelled.
“Thanks!” Nico said cheerfully, waving.
“Screw you!” Becki screamed, flipping her off.
Shaking her head and laughing, Kizzy made her way towards him. “Poor Becki,” she giggled. “Carried off kicking and screaming twice now.”
He stared up into her kind eyes, the color of dark maple syrup, framed by thick, black lashes that were identical to Shandor’s.
When he didn’t respond, she put her hands on her hips and pursed her lips. “Xan Daniel, are you sitting here moping?”
He snorted. “Pretty much, mamă Kizzy.”
Kneeling down in front of him, she placed her hands on his knees. “Băiatul meu, this is not what he would’ve wanted for you. Not Shandor, not Trinity and definitely not your mamă.”
He gave her a sad smile. “You gonna have another copil, mamă Kizzy? Another Shandor? I’d be so damn grateful.”
“Ah, dragă. I could have thousands of copii, but without my Mihai none of them would be my dulce Shandor.”
Leaning forward, he gave her a soft kiss on her chapped, winter-reddened lips. “Te iubesc,” he said hoarsely. “And so did they. Fuck. I should have tried harder to save them. If I would have done something different, then maybe—”
Kizzy placed her index finger across his lips.
“Time to let go, Xan Daniel,” she whispered. “Your mamă and my husband and son have gone back to nature. But luckily, we still have our lives and it’s time to start living them again.”
She stood up and wiped away the stray tears that had gotten through the wall she had built around her heart. Then, shocking him, she removed the orange and red diklo he had never once seen her without. Shaking her head, her long, brown and gray hair fanned out around her pretty face and slim shoulders.
She held out her hand to him. “Come, baiatul meu, you help me shovel and I’ll tell you the story of two beloved little troublemakers who were the best of friends and as thick as thieves. And despite the havoc they wreaked on their poor clan, both of those boys grew into two strong, hardworking men that their mamăs proudly cherished and adored.”
Smiling broadly and fighting back tears, he placed his hand in hers. “Let’s get to it then.”
******
Six days later Becki’s water broke and Michaela Jaelle Sava-Čonka came kicking and screaming into this world. No doubt, she took after her mother, who always seemed to be kicking and screaming about something.
Despite the child’s innate temper, her birth awoke something inside of the clan members that had been suppressed by the constant threat of violence and death. For the first time in a long time, they had something new to celebrate. And celebrate they did, with a
feast and a fire dance. What the hell were Gypsies who didn’t celebrate, anyway? They were tanned Gajes on an extended camping trip. Which was not cool. Not at all.
On his way to pay the happy family a visit, he bumped into Tobar pacing back and forth outside of Becki and Nico’s trailer. Frate looked like he hadn’t slept in a week.
“You look like shit,” Xan said.
“Yeah,” Tobar muttered, running his hands through his hair. “Thanks.”
“So…are you going in?”
Tobar blanched. “I can't,” he whispered. “She hasn’t spoken to me since the night she married Hockey. She won’t even look at me.”
“Yeah, well, you fucked that one up all on your own. You had the chance to claim her. Hell, you had nine months to claim her and the copil, but you didn’t. You let Hockey take the blame for knocking her up. Epic fail, frate.”
“I freaked. You know my mamă would have beaten the shit outta me for getting her pregnant! Hell, she would have taken the strap to me just for fucking her! Just as Nadya was promised to Marko, Adriana was promised to me! That’s how it was supposed to be! Combining the two most powerful families in the clan so our children would be even more powerful!”
Eh. He’d never paid attention to clan politics. He’d been born without an active power so the whole shebang was a moot point to him.
“And Nadya…the lucky little bitch, after mamă died, used you to get the fuck outta her marriage! But by then it was already too late with Becki, and now I’m stuck on the sidelines, forced to watch the woman I love suck face with Nico, and now my daughter is going to grow up thinking someone else is her tată!”
He stared at him. Tobar loved Becki?
“Nico!” Tobar exclaimed, “It was bad enough when she married Hockey, but Nico Čonka! He is just as big of an asshole and a whore as you and Shandor! There is no way he’s going to be faithful to her!”
He frowned. “Hey. Don’t talk shit about the dead.”
“Whatever,” Tobar muttered. “Shandor was a whore, treated all the fete like they were shit on a shoe, same as you did. You rocked the entire camp when you married Trinity and then requested a formal ceremony to boot."
He shrugged. “And you should have done the same with Becki. But you pussied out, whereas I would have put a bullet in anyone who tried to stop me. And stop talking shit about Shandor. Unless you want to find a knife in the base of your spine. If that’s the case, then by all means, continue.”
Tobar glared at him. “Fucking mercenary to the core, aren’t you? I’m surprised you’re even capable of love. Speaking of, did you ever tell Trinity what you really did for a living? Or did you pussy out?”
Touché. The imposter of a Baró had him there.
“That’s what I thought,” Tobar sneered. “You knew she’d flip. Hell, the whole clan would flip if they knew what you and Shandor were capable of. If they’d known what my tata mare had been capable of.”
Tobar was right. It was one thing to know he had been Jericho’s henchmen, but an entirely different thing to know exactly what Jericho had requested of him. And to know that he had not given a shit what the jobs had entailed as long as he had been paid enough to fund his dirt bike and motorcycle obsessions.
“Tobar, cut the shit and go meet your daughter.”
Before Tobar could pussy out some more, he grabbed frate’s arm, dragged him up the steps, and pushed him through the door. Nico’s mamă, Madeleana, Hockey’s mamă, Aishe, Maisera and Becki were all sitting on the couch. Nico was standing in the kitchen shooting the shit with Indiana while he rocked a tiny bundle in his arms.
“What the fuck is he doing here?” Nico demanded, scowling at Tobar.
Cursing, Tobar tried to pull away but Xan held fast to his arm and shoved him forward. “He’s here to meet his daughter,” he announced none too gently, and gave Becki a pointed look.
“What did you just say?” Maisera demanded, getting to her feet.
“Tobar’s daughter?” Aishe screeched. “That’s my boy’s baby!”
“No,” Becki whispered, her eyes clouding over. “Tobar is her tată.”
Aishe’s mouth fell open.
“Becki!” Nico yelled.
“Please, mamă Sava! You’re still her bunică!” Becki cried, ignoring her husband. “With both my mamă and tată gone, she needs you!”
Maisera crossed the few feet between her and her grandson and slapped him across the face. Once. Twice. Three times. Tobar’s head whipped back and forth under the onslaught.
“Nu am fost niciodată atât de dezamăgită în toată viața!” she yelled and slapped him again. “Since you choose to act like a child, I should treat you as one and take the strap to you!” she hissed, slapping him again. Tobar’s nostrils flared with anger but he stood tall and took his beating like a man. Frate knew he deserved it.
Maisera pointed at Nico. “Dă-i fiica sa!” she snapped. “Now!”
Nico looked about ready to take Tobar out back and chop him into firewood, but no one argued with Maisera. The seventy-something-year-old woman could, and would, magically wipe the floor with anyone who pissed her off.
As Nico handed over the bundle of baby to Tobar, the two men glared at each other. Then Tobar took one look at his daughter’s tiny, red face and dropped to his knees.
Tears in his eyes, he looked over to Becki. “Vă rog să-mi permiteți a fi tatăl ei,” he whispered, hoarsely. “I promise I won’t fuck up this time.”
Crying, Becki nodded. “Fiica noastră va avea doi tați.”
Tobar and Nico stared at each other, both looking unhappy but resigned.
“Thank you,” Tobar whispered to Becki.
“Mamă Sava?” Becki whispered, looking at her former mother-in-law with pleading eyes.
Aishe pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed dramatically. Shaking her head, she sniffed loudly. “Of course I will not forsake the copil. After all, she’ll need someone in her life that will instill a decent set of morals.”
As Maisera looked around the room and into the faces of the members of her clan, the pride in her eyes was evident. “Ei, acesta este clanul meu.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
SPRING
Today was supposed to be my first trip out of the park since last fall. But, instead of raiding, Gerik wanted to take me somewhere that he had deemed “special”. He wouldn’t tell me where or what this mysterious place was and, even worse, he wanted to fly me there. I found him outside, shirtless and barefoot, with his wings jerking restlessly behind him.
I swallowed hard. “Are you sure we can’t take the Jeep?”
“There’s not enough gas to get us there. So either way you’re going to end up in the air, Trinity.”
My stomach roiled at the thought of being up in the sky with nothing but a pair of arms keeping me from falling to my death. The one and only time I had ever flown with Gerik had been mere minutes after his initial transformation. I hadn’t had the time to protest, everything had happened so quickly. But I remembered the panic very well. Very, very, well.
I would never drop you.
I stuck my tongue out at him. Maybe not intentionally.
Rolling his shoulders, he shifted impatiently. Let’s go, Trinity.
I shook my head. “I can’t do this. I’m sorry but I just can’t.”
I had just turned around when his tail snaked around my ankle, curled up my calf, and yanked my feet right out from under me. I didn’t even have time to properly scream before I was falling face-first toward the ground. I flung my arms forward, ready to brace my fall.
But I never fell.
Using only his tail, Gerik flung me upwards and released me. Twice I cart-wheeled through the air before that damn tail of his wrapped around my waist and deposited me into his waiting arms. I was still reeling from the acrobatics when his wings streamlined and he leapt off the ground and into the air.
Then we were airborne and I was watching the ground quickly rush away. I buried my face in G
erik’s chest and screamed at the top of lungs.
Trinity, shut up and open your eyes!
No!
TRINITY!
NO!
TRINITY! OPEN YOUR EYES!
NO!
Please?
I cracked a lid. It didn’t look like we were catapulting to our death so I opened my other eye.
Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out…I squeezed them shut.
Oh my gods, Gerik, we are going to die!
Look at me, Trinity.
The minute my eyes locked with his, my fear lessened.
Would I let you die?
Not intentionally, no.
He sighed, exasperated with me.
You can’t hear it, Trinity, but I’m growling at you.
The longer we flew, the more comfortable I became. Eventually I was able to look at something other than Gerik’s face. I watched fat, heavy clouds roll by alongside us and every so often, a lone bird would pause in flight to check us out. It was peaceful, much more so than the land below. It wasn’t wrought with memories of a world marred by the remains of a destroyed civilization. The sky had remained untouched by the destruction below, making me feel as if not quite everything had been lost.
Told you so.
Shut it, bird man.
The bond filled with amusement.
******
As we flew through Pittsburg, my thoughts immediately turned to Shandor.
Why didn’t you kill him? Gerik asked, listening.
Because he is Shandor. Could you have killed him?
Yes.
Yes? Just like that? No questions asked?
Yes.
But—
No buts. That thing you were talking to may have looked like Shandor, sounded like Shandor, and acted like Shandor, but it wasn’t. Shandor’s dead. What you were interacting with was the disease that killed him.
But—
NO BUTS! Eventually, Trinity, I’m not going to be me anymore! And I might not be around to protect you! Give me the peace of mind that comes with knowing you are not going to be striking up conversations with those things!
I didn’t agree with him. Not even a little. But I didn’t want him to be worrying about me either, so I changed the subject.