Chapter Twenty-Two
Bonnie knew the minute that Zander and his friends came into the party, because the noise level went way up.
Honestly, Zander was calmer than his friends, sort of, at least around Bonnie, but as a group, they were definitely wild.
It was kind of irritating, actual y.
But when Zander appeared next to her - hip-checking Marcus into a wal on his way - and gave her his long, slow smile, her toes curled inside her high-heeled shoes and she forgot al about being annoyed.
"Hi!" she said. "Is everything okay?" He cocked an eyebrow at her inquiringly. "I mean, you said something came up with your family, and that's why you've been . . . busy. "
"Oh, yeah. " Zander bent his head down to talk to her, and his warm breath ghosted across Bonnie's neck as he sighed. "My family's pretty complicated," he said. "I wish sometimes that things were easier. " He looked sad, and Bonnie impulsively took his hand, twining her fingers through his.
"Well, what's wrong?" she asked, striving for a tone of understanding and reliability. A dependable girlfriend tone.
"Maybe I can help. You know, a fresh ear and al that. " Zander frowned and bit his lip. "I guess it's like. . . I have responsibilities. My whole family is in a position where there are promises we've made and sort of things we have to take care of. And sometimes what I want to do and what I have to do don't line up. "
"Could you be any more vague?" Bonnie asked teasingly, and Zander huffed a half laugh. "Seriously, what do you mean? What do you have to do? What don't you want to do?"
Zander looked down at her for a moment and then his smile widened. "Come on," he said, tugging her hand.
Bonnie went with him, weaving their way through the party and up the stairs. Zander seemed to know where he was going; he turned a couple of corners, then pushed open a door.
Inside was a dorm common room: a couple of ratty couches, a banged-up table. Someone's art project, a large canvas covered with splotches of paint, leaned against the wal .
"Do you live in this dorm?" she asked Zander.
"No," he said, his eyes on her mouth. He pul ed her toward him and rested his hands on her hips. And then he kissed her.
It was the most amazing kiss Bonnie had ever experienced. Zander's lips were so soft, yet firm, and there were little fireworks going off al over Bonnie's body. She lifted her hand and cupped it against his cheek, feeling the strong bones of his face and the slight scratch of stubble against her palm.
Once again, she felt as she had during their first date, standing on the roof, when it had been like she was flying.
So free, and with a wild kind of joy zinging through her. She slid her hand to the back of his neck, feeling Zander's fine pale blond hair brush softly against her fingers.
When the kiss ended, neither of them spoke for a moment, they just leaned against each other, breathing hard. Their faces were so close, and Zander's bril iant blue eyes were fixed on hers, warm and intent.
"Anyway, that's what I want to do, since you asked. Do you" - his voice cracked - "do you want to go back to the party now?"
"No," said Bonnie, "not yet. " And this time, she kissed him.
"Oh, thank God," Chloe said when Matt came up to her. "I was beginning to feel like the biggest wal flower. " She crinkled her nose appealingly at him. Her nose, which tilted up just a little, was spattered with freckles, and she had a pretty cupid's bow of a mouth. He wanted to tug gently on the soft brown ringlets of her curls, just to see them straighten and then spring back into shape.
"What do you mean?" he said, pul ing himself back together, although he was painful y aware that he sounded half-witted. "A wal flower?"
"Oh, just. . . " She waved one hand vaguely at the crowd.
"There's hardly anyone I know here besides you and Ethan.
This whole party's completely stuffed with freshmen. " Matt's heart sank. He had forgotten that Chloe was a junior. It shouldn't be a big deal, real y, should it? But she sounded like she thought freshmen were beneath her, or something. Disdainful, that was the word he was looking for to describe her tone.
"I thought the party seemed okay," he said weakly.
Chloe pursed her lips teasingly, then socked him gently on the arm. "Well," she said softly, "there's only enough room for one freshman in my life. Right, Matt?" That was more of a hopeful sign. The problem was, Matt realized, that his only dating experience had been in asking out girls who he either didn't real y care about, but was just thinking of as potential dates for dances or whatever, or who were Elena. Who, yes, he cared tremendously about, but who he knew for long enough and Wellenough that he could tel she was going to say yes.
Stil , he thought he could see an opening here.
"Chloe," he said, "I was wondering if you would - " Matt broke off as Ethan joined them, smiling widely. For the first time, Matt felt a flash of irritation toward him. Ethan was so smart with people. Couldn't he see he was interrupting a moment here?
"I liked your friend Stefan," Ethan told Matt. "He seemed very sophisticated for a freshman, very Wellspoken. Do you think it's because he's European?"
Matt only shrugged in response, and Ethan turned to Chloe.
"Hey, sweetheart," he said, putting an arm around her and kissing her lightly on the lips.
And yeah, wow, maybe Ethan had realized he was interrupting a moment. It wasn't a long kiss, but there was definitely a possessive air about it, and about his arm flung across Chloe's shoulders. When it ended, Chloe smiled up at Ethan, breathless, and Ethan's eyes flicked to Matt, just for a second.
Matt wanted to fold right over and sink into the sticky, beer-stained floor beneath his feet. But instead he eked out a smile of his own and tipped his beer to Ethan.
Because Chloe - adorable, sweet, funny, easygoing Chloe - had a boyfriend. He ought to have anticipated that he wouldn't be the only one who saw how amazing she was. And Matt would have backed off no matter who Chloe's boyfriend was. He didn't want to be that guy who sleazed al over other people's relationships; he never had been.
But since Chloe's boyfriend was Ethan? Ethan, the Vitale Society leader, the one who had made Matt feel like he was special, like he could be the best? Since it was Ethan, Matt was just going to have to grit his teeth and ignore that hol ow feeling in his chest. He was going to be strong and keep himself from even thinking about what he wished could have been with Chloe.
There were some lines he just couldn't cross. Ever.