"Ok, I've had enough." Anne looked over at Carla who had stopped walking and sat on a bench in the little park that was a few blocks from their houses. Carla and Gary liked to walk their dog to the park every day, but ever since Anne had moved in, Carla and Anne began taking power walks when their schedules allowed, usually taking the dog with them. But today Gary had the dog, and they had a late start on their walk because Carla had catered a wedding the evening before and was too tired to get out of bed. They had only walked the two blocks to the entrance to the park, so far, and Carla was tired already. This worried Anne. She sat beside Carla on the bench, looked at her, and examined her face for signs of fatigue or illness. She did not find either.
"Are you feeling ok, Carla? It's not like you to be tired so soon."
"I don't mean that I'm tired. I mean I've had enough of waiting for you to tell me what's going on. You haven't been the same since you went to your parents’ last month. It's been seven, make that eight weeks, and you have not told me why you seem so heartsick I guess is the word. Talk to me, Anne."
It was late morning, later than they usually walked and more people were out either walking, running, or in-line skating along the paved paths that wove through the park and the attached nature preserve. Anne leaned back on the bench and watched them as she reached up to pull the clip from her hair. Then she pulled the mass of hair back in her hand and attached the clip again.
"You're stalling, Anne."
"I know, Carla." Anne looked at her friend with a sad expression. "I gave my notice yesterday."
"What? Why, Anne? I thought that you liked Stanford Enterprises. You've only been there a few weeks."
"I do like the company. It's just not going to work, my being there." A young mother pushed a baby stroller by, and Anne could see another young mother further down the path. She thought it was funny how she had never noticed all of the pregnant women and women with babies in the area before. Her focus had certainly changed in the last week. "Carla, do you remember Ben Carlson?"
"Ben Carlson? You mean the one from the inn? You're talking about that Ben Carlson? Of course I do. He was hot. You and Ben were kind of an item when he used to come up to the island."
"We weren't an 'item'. Most of the time he didn’t even know that I was alive other than that I was the Petrovic kid who guided him and Lily around."
"That's not how I remember it, Anne. What about him?"
"He was at the inn that week for Lily's wedding. She got married on the island that weekend."
"Ok. So you saw Ben Carlson. Did something happen between you two?"
"You could say that." She told Carla about pretending to be Ben's fiancée to discourage Chelsea and that she and Ben began an actual relationship during that time. Anne looked over at Carla, hoping that she would not see any censure. There wasn't any.
"So, are you planning on seeing him again? He still lives in the area, doesn't he?"
"No, I won't be seeing him again, at least not romantically. It turns out that Ben is actually Benjamin Stanford III, as in Stanford Enterprises."
"No way," Carla exclaimed as she grabbed Anne's arm. "So he's your boss. I can see how that would be a problem. Has he made it difficult for you at work? Is that why you're quitting?"
"No, he was out of the country until earlier this week, and I only saw him for a short time on Monday. He treated me very professionally."
"I see. No, I don't. From what you said, I think that you want to keep seeing him, but he isn't interested. Have I got it right, so far?" Anne nodded in agreement and told her what Ben had accused her of before breaking their relationship off that Saturday. "That's terrible, Anne. But I can kind of see his side, too. Not that you would ever do that, but that if past girlfriends always wanted him for other reasons than him, well, his not knowing that you were the applicant would seem like you were using him. But this is Ben, Anne. The guy was always crazy about you. If you want my advice, hang in there because he will eventually come around. He probably already regrets jumping to the wrong conclusion.
"That's not all, Carla. I'm pregnant."
"What? You're just telling me now?"
"I just found out for sure this week. Before that, I thought it was stress from everything."
"That would make you almost eight weeks, a month and a half behind me. How are you feeling, otherwise?"
"Fine, I guess. The doctor said I looked good other than the fact that I looked tired. Carla, what am I going to do? Ben had other ex-girlfriends who tried to trap him into marriage with false claims of pregnancy. I can't tell him that I'm pregnant. He will think that I’m trying to trap him. And I definitely cannot continue to work there. The last thing I want to do is tell him so that he feels that he has to be the father to a baby that he doesn't want. And I won't marry him because of it. Not if he does not love me."
"But you love him," Carla stated matter-of-factly. "Well, in my opinion, I think you are underestimating him. He has a right to know that he is going to be a father, Anne."
"I know, and I'll tell him after I've left the company."
"Have you decided what you are going to do for work? You can't work for another research company for the next year. What are you going to do for money?"
"I plan on writing up my curriculum vitae this afternoon and sending it to the University and to the Aquarium. I hope to get some adjunct work teaching jobs, and I can do some consulting. And if that isn't enough, I plan on asking my father."
"There has to be a better way than asking your father. The last thing you need, especially now, is your father in your life messing it up." Carla had her lips pursed in distaste at the mention of Anne's father. She was a true friend, Anne thought. "You told me how you think Ben will feel, but you haven't told me what you feel. Do you love Ben?"
"Yes. I had hoped that it would fade, but it hasn't. It's only gotten worse."
"What about the baby?"
"I'm scared and happy all at the same time. I keep rubbing my belly to see if there has been any change even though I know that it’s too early. And I talk to the baby. Is that strange?"
"It sounds perfectly normal to me because I do the same things. Oh, Anne. This will be great. We will go through all the stages together, and our kids will play together."
From that point on the conversation turned to pregnancy and babies. Anne and Carla stood back up and continued their walk, and after they were finished, they walked back to the neighborhood. Anne stopped at Carla's house to look at paint samples and to try a new recipe that Carla was testing for lunch. If it was good, she was planning on presenting it as part of the entree course for a catered fiftieth wedding anniversary next month. Then they sat on Carla's back patio and drank glasses of ice water until Gary came home an hour later with Bob in tow.
"Hi, honey," Carla called out from the patio.
"Hi! Hey, Anne! You have a visitor at your house. There is a car in the driveway."
"There is?" Anne put her water glass down on the table and got up to walk around to the front of the house to look down the block at the strange silver Lexus sports sedan sitting in her driveway behind her SUV. Carla came up behind her, something that did not surprise Anne.
"Is it Ben?"
"I don't know, Carla. I don't know what kind of car he drives."
"I think that it's him. Go on home. You can tell me who it is later."
Anne didn’t bother to say goodbye but began to walk down the street to her house. Her stomach began to jump the closer she got, and it felt as if her nerves were strung tight, ready to snap at the slightest provocation. The car blocked her view of her front door, so she did not see Ben sitting on the front steps until she walked around the back of his car. He was dressed in old jeans with a hole in the right knee, an old gray tee shirt, and a ratty old pair of athletic shoes. His hair was a mess, as if he ran his hands through it several times. Her heart leaped when she saw him. He stopped looking
at his smart phone and stood up immediately when she came into view. She felt too nervous to talk, and she pulled her key from her pocket and walked forward until she was only a few feet away from him.
"Hello, Ben," she croaked out a greeting. She couldn’t make out what he was thinking from his expression. His face had a guarded look with a burning, intense gaze. He did not greet her, a fact she noticed because it made the pain in her chest widen to other parts of her body. She climbed her steps and moved around him to unlock the front door. Once she had it unlocked, she stepped over the threshold and held the door open for him to come inside.
Chapter 21