I was up with the first ray of sunrise, so by the time I had my bath andwas dressed there was ample light. I went down to the dock at once, andspent the morning looking over the vessel, which fully justifies Rooke'senthusiasm about her. She is built on lovely lines, and I can quiteunderstand that she is enormously fast. Her armour I can only take onthe specifications, but her armament is really wonderful. And there arenot only all the very newest devices of aggressive warfare--indeed, shehas the newest up-to-date torpedoes and torpedo-guns--but also theold-fashioned rocket-tubes, which in certain occasions are so useful.She has electric guns and the latest Massillon water-guns, and Reinhardtelectro-pneumatic "deliverers" for pyroxiline shells. She is evenequipped with war-balloons easy of expansion, and with compressibleKitson aeroplanes. I don't suppose that there is anything quite like herin the world.
The crew are worthy of her. I can't imagine where Rooke picked up such asplendid lot of men. They are nearly all man-of-warsmen; of variousnationalities, but mostly British. All young men--the oldest of themhasn't got into the forties--and, so far as I can learn, all experts ofone kind or another in some special subject of warfare. It will go hardwith me, but I shall keep them together.
How I got through the rest of the day I know not. I tried hard not tocreate any domestic trouble by my manner, lest Aunt Janet should, afterher lurid dream or vision of last night, attach some new importance toit. I think I succeeded, for she did not, so far as I could tell, takeany special notice of me. We parted as usual at half-past ten, and Icame here and made this entry in my journal. I am more restless thanever to-night, and no wonder. I would give anything to be able to pay avisit to St. Sava's, and see my wife again--if it were only sleeping inher tomb. But I dare not do even that, lest she should come to see mehere, and I should miss her. So I have done what I can. The glass doorto the Terrace is open, so that she can enter at once if she comes. Thefire is lit, and the room is warm. There is food ready in case sheshould care for it. I have plenty of light in the room, so that throughthe aperture where I have not fully drawn the curtain there may be lightto guide her.
Oh, how the time drags! The clock has struck midnight. One, two! Thankgoodness, it will shortly be dawn, and the activity of the day may begin!Work may again prove, in a way, to be an anodyne. In the meantime I mustwrite on, lest despair overwhelm me.
Once during the night I thought I heard a footstep outside. I rushed tothe window and looked out, but there was nothing to see, no sound tohear. That was a little after one o'clock. I feared to go outside, lestthat should alarm her; so I came back to my table. I could not write,but I sat as if writing for a while. But I could not stand it, so roseand walked about the room. As I walked I felt that my Lady--it gives mea pang every time I remember that I do not know even her name--was notquite so far away from me. It made my heart beat to think that it mightmean that she was coming to me. Could not I as well as Aunt Janet have alittle Second Sight! I went towards the window, and, standing behind thecurtain, listened. Far away I thought I heard a cry, and ran out on theTerrace; but there was no sound to be heard, and no sign of any livingthing anywhere; so I took it for granted that it was the cry of somenight bird, and came back to my room, and wrote at my journal till I wascalm. I think my nerves must be getting out of order, when every soundof the night seems to have a special meaning for me.