where, asunfortunate men, we were used with great humanity, as well by themagistrates of the town, who assigned us good quarters, as by particularmerchants and owners of ships, and had money given us sufficient tocarry us either to London or back to Hull, as we thought fit.
Had I now had the sense to have gone back to Hull, and have gone home, Ihad been happy, and my father, an emblem of our blessed Saviour'sparable, had even killed the fatted calf for me; for hearing the ship Iwent away in was cast away in Yarmouth Roads, it was a great whilebefore he had any assurance that I was not drowned.
But my ill fate pushed me on now with an obstinacy that nothing couldresist; and though I had several times loud calls from my reason, and mymore composed judgment, to go home, yet I had no power to do it. I knownot what to call this, nor will I urge that it is a secret overrulingdecree that hurries us on to be the instruments of our own destruction,even though it be before us, and that we rush upon it with our eyesopen. Certainly, nothing but some such decreed unavoidable miseryattending, and which it was impossible for me to escape, could havepushed me forward against the calm reasonings and persuasions of my mostretired thoughts, and against two such visible instructions as I had metwith in my first attempt.
My comrade, who had helped to harden me before, and who was the master'sson, was now less forward than I. The first time he spoke to me after wewere at Yarmouth, which was not till two or three days, for we wereseparated in the town to several quarters; I say, the first time he sawme, it appeared his tone was altered, and looking very melancholy, andshaking his head, asked me how I did, and telling his father who I was,and how I had come this voyage only for a trial, in order to go fartherabroad; his father turning to me with a very grave and concerned tone,"Young man," says he, "you ought never to go to sea any more; you oughtto take this for a plain and visible token that you are not to be aseafaring man,"--"Why, Sir," said I, "will you go to sea no more?" "Thatis another case," said he; "it is my calling, and therefore my duty; butas you made this voyage for a trial, you see what a taste Heaven hasgiven you of what you are to expect if you persist. Perhaps this has allbefallen us on your account, like Jonah in the ship of Tarshish. Pray,"continues he, "what are you; and on what account did you go to sea?"Upon that I told him some of my story; at the end of which he burst outwith a strange kind of passion; "What had I done," says he, "that suchan unhappy wretch should come into my ship? I would not set my foot inthe same ship with thee again for a thousand pounds," This indeed was,as I said, an excursion of his spirits, which were yet agitated by thesense of his loss, and was farther than he could have authority to go.However, he afterwards talked very gravely to me, exhorting me to goback to my father, and not tempt Providence to my ruin; told me I mightsee a visible hand of Heaven against me. "And young man," said he,"depend upon it, if you do not go back, wherever you go, you will meetwith nothing but disasters and disappointments, till your father's wordsare fulfilled upon you."
We parted soon after; for I made him little answer, and I saw him nomore: which way he went, I know not. As for me, having some money in mypocket, I travelled to London by land; and there, as well as on theroad, had many struggles with myself, what course of life I shouldtake, and whether I should go home, or go to sea.
As to going home, shame opposed the best notions that offered to mythoughts; and it immediately occurred to me how I should be laughed atamong the neighbours, and should be ashamed to see, not my father andmother only, but even every body else; from whence I have since oftenobserved, how incongruous and irrational the common temper of mankindis, especially of youth, to that reason which ought to guide them insuch cases, viz. that they are not ashamed to sin, and yet are ashamedto repent; nor ashamed of the action for which they ought justly to beesteemed fools, but are ashamed of the returning, which only can makethem be esteemed wise men.
In this state of life, however, I remained some time, uncertain whatmeasures to take, and what course of life to lead. An irresistiblereluctance continued to going home; and as I stayed a while, theremembrance of the distress I had been in wore off; and as that abated,the little notion I had in my desires to a return wore off with it, tillat last I quite laid aside the thoughts of it, and looked out fora voyage.
That evil influence which carried me first away from my father's house,that hurried me into the wild and indigested notion of raising myfortune; and that impressed those conceits so forcibly upon me, as tomake me deaf to all good advice, and to the entreaties and even thecommands of my father: I say, the same influence, whatever it was,presented the most unfortunate of all enterprises to my view; and Iwent on board a vessel bound to the coast of Africa; or, as our sailorsvulgarly call it, a voyage to Guinea.
It was my great misfortune that in all these adventures I did not shipmyself as a sailor; whereby, though I might indeed have worked a littleharder than ordinary, yet at the same time I had learnt the duty andoffice of a foremast-man; and in time might have qualified myself for amate or lieutenant, if not for a master. But as it was always my fate tochoose for the worse, so I did here; for having money in my pocket, andgood clothes upon my back, I would always go on board in the habit of agentleman; and so I neither had any business in the ship, or learntto do any.
It was my lot first of all to fall into pretty good company in London,which does not always happen to such loose and unguided young fellows asI then was; the devil generally not omitting to lay some snare for themvery early: but it was not so with me. I first fell acquainted with themaster of a ship who had been on the coast of Guinea; and who, havinghad very good success there, was resolved to go again; and who taking afancy to my conversation, which was not at all disagreeable at thattime, hearing me say I had a mind to see the world, told me if I wouldgo the voyage with him I should be at no expense; I should be hismessmate and his companion; and if I could carry any thing with me, Ishould have all the advantage of it that the trade would admit; andperhaps I might meet with some encouragement.
I embraced the offer; and entering into a strict friendship with thiscaptain, who was an honest and plain-dealing man, I went the voyage withhim, and carried a small adventure with me, which, by the disinterestedhonesty of my friend the captain, I increased very considerably; for Icarried about L40 in such toys and trifles as the captain directed me tobuy. This L40 I had mustered together by the assistance of some of myrelations whom I corresponded with, and who, I believe, got my father,or at least my mother, to contribute so much as that to my firstadventure.
This was the only voyage which I may say I was successful in all myadventures, and which I owe to the integrity and honesty of my friendthe captain; under whom also I got a competent knowledge of themathematics and the rules of navigation, learnt how to keep an accountof the ship's course, take an observation, and, in short, to understandsome things that were needful to be understood by a sailor: for, as hetook delight to instruct me, I took delight to learn; and, in a word,this voyage made me both a sailor and a merchant: for I brought homefive pounds nine ounces of gold-dust for my adventure, which yielded mein London at my return almost L300, and this filled me with thoseaspiring thoughts which have so completed my ruin.
Yet even in this voyage I had my misfortunes too; particularly, that Iwas continually sick, being thrown into a violent calenture by theexcessive heat of the climate; our principal trading being upon thecoast, from the latitude of 15 degrees north even to the line itself.
I was now set up for a Guinea trader; and my friend, to my greatmisfortune, dying soon after his arrival, I resolved to go the samevoyage again, and I embarked in the same vessel with one who was hismate in his former voyage, and had now got the command of the ship. Thiswas the unhappiest voyage that ever man made; for though I did not carryquite L100 of my new-gained wealth, so that I had L200 left, and which Ilodged with my friend's widow, who was very just to me, yet I fell intoterrible misfortunes in this voyage; and the first was this, viz. ourship making her course towards the Canary Islands, or rather betweenthose islands and the African shore
, was surprised in the grey of themorning by a Turkish rover, of Sallee, who gave chase to us with all thesail she could make. We crowded also as much canvass as our yards wouldspread, or our masts carry to have got clear; but finding the pirategained upon us, and would certainly come up with us in a few hours, weprepared to fight; our ship having twelve guns, and the rover eighteen.About three in the afternoon he came up with us, and bringing to, bymistake, just athwart our quarter, instead of athwart our stern, as heintended, we brought eight of our guns to bear on that side, and pouredin a broadside upon him, which made him sheer off again, after returningour fire, and pouring in also his small-shot from near 200 men which hehad on board. However, we had not a man touched, all our men keepingclose. He prepared to attack us again, and we to defend ourselves; butlaying us on board the next time upon our other quarter, he