~Captain Kailash Beldron, at the Starfarer’s Union meeting in 3242 A.D.
Adam was conscious. I was surprised; I had heard that he was still unconscious only shortly before we had entered the planet’s atmosphere. When he saw me, he raised one eyebrow and put a finger to his lips. I looked around. The physician was not in the room, having returned to his chamber after letting me in. I walked next to Adam’s bed. He looked pale and weak, and something was wrong about him. It took me a moment to notice that he wasn’t wearing his sunglasses. He was actually rather handsome when you could see his eyes – they were a rich green. “Why isn’t the ship moving?” He sounded genuinely concerned. I realized that he didn’t know that we had landed – unless Gerald had told him, which he apparently hadn’t.
I thought for a moment before answering. “Because we’ve landed.” He sat up straight in bed, then winced and slowly lay back down. His eyes were wide open now.
“Where? How? Why?” He began to sit up again, but I pushed him back down.
“Does anyone know you’re conscious?” He shook his head. “You may want to keep it that way; no one can prove you’re not a conspirator – and I’m not sure I’d help you convince them you’re not.”
He smiled wryly. “I don’t blame you. It shouldn’t be too hard for me to pretend to be unconscious – I feel dead.” He coughed. “So, where are we?”
“Some planet in the… Antarct system. The fourth one. It’s relatively hospitable – we only needed one pill to allow us to breathe here.” He nodded. I hesitated. “Do you need to get the pill in case the outside air comes in…?”
He laughed, then burst out coughing. When it subsided, he replied, “I don’t think so. The hospital wing generates an artificial atmosphere. I should be fine. Thanks for the offer though.” He coughed again. “So, what’s it like out there?”
I shrugged. “Fairly similar to Earth. I suppose any planet we chose to land on would be – but it has these grey and purple tree-things, and lots of red dirt. And a green sky.”
He said nothing for a few minutes. His eyes were closed, and I thought he had fallen asleep. As I began to tiptoe away, he spoke. “Has Vincent named the planet yet?”
I stopped. “No? Does he have the authority to?”
Adam grinned. “He was probably the first to set foot on the planet. It’s the captain’s duty – or honor, I suppose, to do so. And the first one to set foot on an unnamed planet gets to name it.” I had not known that. I made a mental note to ask Vincent about it when I saw him next.
Seeing that he was tired, I began to leave again, but he asked me to stop. I turned back to him. He beckoned me closer. “Why’d you come visit me? I appreciate it, but for the life of me, I can’t fathom why you would come to see me – unless you wanted to see my pitiful state to make yourself feel better.”
I shook my head. “I’m not sure why.” I smiled crookedly. “But I’m glad I did. You’re not nearly so bad when you’re not trying to kill me.” He laughed, which again quickly turned into a fit of coughing.
“I’m sorry about that – I never wanted to do it. It’d be perfectly understandable for you to hate me. There’d be no hard feelings.”
I looked down at him, and found that despite all he had done to me, I couldn’t bring myself to hate him. I felt like I should despise him, but he was rather likeable when not in his spy costume.
“Well, I certainly don’t trust you – but no, I don’t hate you. You’re on the good side.”
He sighed. “Or so I like to believe. I never wanted to come along in the first place, you know. You saw me get taken down in Raheera – I didn’t put up a fight. I hated – and still do hate – hurting people, especially physically.” He laughed cynically. “I got myself in a bad position for someone with those feelings.
“But then the goddamn Bajans broke me down in their prison – they released my violent side and bartered me back to Ireland, on the promise that I would be sent to join the Ambassador as the Irish representative. My superiors thought they were getting a good deal – they would have their spy back for almost no cost to them. But I wasn’t truly to be Ireland’s representative – I would be under the control of the Bajans, through Crydgar. I still hate killing, but I can do it now… and I have to. They imprinted me… Crydgar could turn me off whenever he wished.” His voice was almost pleading now, as if he was begging me to listen to his story.
“Just hearing that one simple phrase sends me into painful seizures – I’m always afraid someone will say it by accident, and it’ll kill me. Crydgar knew the phrase, so I had to do what he said to make sure he didn’t hurt me – and it hurts so much, more than you can imagine… I never had any real choice. I liked you, really – but Crydgar forced me to play good-cop bad-cop, and then to try to kill you. I’m so sorry…”
I wasn’t sure what to say. I had not been expecting to visit Adam and find a broken man before me. Neither of us said anything for a few minutes, and then I awkwardly patted him on the shoulder. “It’s okay. Don’t worry about it.”
Adam sighed, then coughed. When he spoke, his voice was back to its usual drawl. “Anyway, I suppose I’ll go back to pretending to be unconscious. Enjoy yourself.”
I nodded and left the hospital wing. Gerald was sitting in his quarters, which were just before the exit, and I chanced a wave at him, my confidence buoyed by Adam’s acceptance and apparent trust of me. He didn’t notice. Sighing, I left the wing.
I decided to seek out Vincent and ask him about the planet’s name. He had entered the ship earlier, and I hadn’t seen him leave, so I presumed he was still inside. I didn’t pass anyone on the way to the captain’s quarters; they were all outside exploring.
When I arrived, I knocked on the door, rather loudly. Vincent opened it. He smiled when he saw me. “Jak! Done exploring already?”
I nodded. There hadn’t been much to see.
“Well, come in.” He gestured for me to enter, and I did. He closed the door behind me. We sat down at the same table we had the last time I had been in there. He leaned forward and rested his head in his hands, placing his elbows on the table. “So what brings you here?”
I shrugged. “I just wanted to talk. I’m bored, and haven’t talked much to you since the incident with the engines.”
He leaned back. “I’m sorry about that. I was rather busy.”
I smiled “It’s fine, I know. Anyway, I’m not even supposed to be here.” My smile vanished as a wave of depression hit me. “I’m not even sure why anyone pays any attention to me.”
Vincent raised an eyebrow. “You really don’t?” I shook my head. He sighed and leaned forward again. “Mainly because you’re kind, and you’re polite. It’s hard to ignore someone like that.” I think I blushed at that point. I like to think I didn’t, though. “And I think you suffer from some misunderstandings of the general attitude towards stowaways.”
He grinned. “It is generally expected that there will be at least one stowaway on board a ship. Usually, rations are set aside or extra rations are packed just in case. They’re usually found wthin a week or so at the most.
“So most people don’t mind – they’re just an extra hand that they don’t need to worry about overworking, as they’re usually considered dead by those left behind. And who could prove they ever stowed away? The stories about the horrible fates of stowaways are myths. They’re just spread to discourage people from doing it. In truth, successful stowaways are usually admired and welcomed by the crew – much like you were. And you even packed your own rations. I’m surprised there weren’t more of you, considering how huge this expedition was.
“That’s why we pay attention to you. Besides, you’re a full-fledged member of the crew now, and you do your work. There’s no reason to ignore you.”
I nodded. His words made me feel better. “Do we have any plans for escape, or are we stuck here?”
He tilted his head to the side. “We are, in all likelihood, stuck here. I’m sure they’ll noti
ce that we don’t return eventually – but they did choose people who didn’t have families to go on this mission, just in case something like this happens. Do you have any family wondering where you went off to?”
I shrugged. “None that I care about – and I doubt they care about me, either.”
Vincent’s face softened. “I’m sure they miss you, Jak.”
I shook my head. “I came from the poor district in Raheera – the Lower Docks. That’s where they stuff all the scum in society. I know you aren’t Bajan, but I’m sure you have places like that wherever you’re from.” The look on his face told me that it did. “My parents were – are – alcoholics. They hit us all the time. I hardly ever stayed in the house after I got my job at the docks. They probably just assumed I got knifed in some alley somewhere and left me for dead.” I was no longer looking at him, afraid of the pity I knew would be in his eyes.
“Is that why you stowed away?” His voice was gentle. I nodded. I heard him stand and walk over to me. He put his hand on my shoulder. “I’m sorry. Hopefully we’ll be better to you than they were.” I said nothing.
We waited a few moments for me to regain my composure. I excused myself and began to walk out the door. Right before I left, I paused. “Out of curiosity, is there a way to communicate with Earth?”
Vincent shrugged. “Perhaps. Our transmitter is faulty – we hadn’t been able to test it because it doesn’t work when we switch between the Ethyr and reality. I don’t know if Korzos sent messages back each time we stopped at a star system. I am trying to repair it, and send a help message. Of course, at these distances, it will take a week or two for any message to get back to Earth.”
I nodded and took a step out the door, then remembered what I had come for. “Oh, did you name the planet?”
He smiled and nodded. “Yes I did.”
I waited a moment, then asked, “What did you call it?”
He responded instantly. “Kiefan.”
The name didn’t remind me of anything. “Is there a reason for that name?”
He smiled at me. “There is, but for now, that information will remain with me.” I nodded, bid him farewell, and left.
Not sure what to do with myself, I returned to my room. As I sat down, I realized how tired I was. I lay down, closed my eyes, and was asleep.
17
“Rule number one of any exploratory mission landing on an unknown planet: you can’t be too careful. Rule number two: wear your goddamned suit. Rule number three: whatever you do, don’t die.”