Chapter 20
Often the members of the unit socialized outside of training, Riley with them.
Today they were visiting Gasann over where the pilots trained. This was always exciting because there was the chance of spotting a Predator. Or any aircraft. Any aircraft at all would have been great.
They hadn’t spotted one yet.
‘The infantry defends Astar, what does the air force do? I’ve never seen you do anything. Have you?’ Jann looked at Geilar for support, who gave it.
Gasann rolled his eyes. ‘First of all, you can’t see Predators. Second of all, the air force keeps gemengs from getting anywhere near Astar, that’s why it’s always so quiet around here.’
Every time they visited Gasann they had this same argument.
Riley, feeling she rather knew what she was supposed to say now if anyone asked her which field was more important, infantry, air force or submariners, turned her attention to Leili, who was rather deep in conversation with a pilot in training Riley was given to understand was attractive to human females. It was a human thing, she noted, for the male and females to pair off. It involved lots of blushing. As it was a human thing, and not something Riley felt she would have to take part in- she was different after all- she turned her attention to Batar. He was calmly chatting with another boy.
‘Ok, yeah, sure. At least you’re more important than the submariners.’ Jann was saying. Riley knew this meant the conversation was winding down.
‘Agreed.’ Gasann said, ‘what do the submariners ever do? Nothing.’
‘You know Aleitar transferred to Coastside?’
‘Well he was always lazy.’ Gasann shrugged. ‘Maybe I should have transferred too.’
Batar, who noticed Riley taking mental notes of his conversation with the other boy invited her to join them. They were having a rather technical conversation about the weapons mounted on the Predators and comparing them to the MEWs. Riley found it fascinating.
Unnoticed to her, Gasann stood up stiffly. ‘Hey, let’s go.’ he was saying to Jann. ‘We’ve been sitting for too long.’
‘What? I don’t know about you but I spend all day running around.’ Jann said without getting up.
‘Let’s go.’ Gasann said with more force as he glanced towards one of the doors. A group of higher level pilots-in-training were coming in.
Jann looked too. ‘O-oh. Fine, fine. Hey, you guys, we’re going, you want to come?’
They didn’t. Jann and Gasann left alone.
It was perhaps fifteen minutes later when someone joined them at their table. The conversation stopped and Batar and the other boy, Kenis, glanced at their new companion.
‘Don’t let me bother you boys,’ the newcomer said, ‘I’m not here for you.’
‘Hi, Peitar.’ Kenis said in a melancholy voice while Batar simply observed the newcomer quietly.
‘Well hello to you too.’ He turned his attention to Riley and held out his hand. ‘Hi there, I’m Peitar, I don’t think we’ve met.’
Riley was about to respond when she noticed Kenis shaking his head at her. Surprised, she looked back at Peitar, who was smiling widely at her and at Kenis. Then she looked at Batar.
‘Don’t mind him,’ Peitar said and shook her hand. ‘I haven’t seen you around here before, what’s your name?’
Kenis stopped shaking his head. As he wasn’t offering any explanation Riley went ahead and replied, ‘Riley Meilis.’
‘Well, hello.’ he laughed. ‘What a lovely name. Are you in the air force?’
‘No, the infantry.’ Riley said with a smile.
‘Oh, are you enjoying it?’
Riley was about to answer- she could answer these questions now, when Peitar continued talking. She wasn’t particularly bothered though as she was used to this sort of behaviour from Razra.
‘Would you like to come see my plane?’
‘A Predator?’ she asked, a touch of eagerness in her voice.
‘No, not yet.’ he said modestly. ‘I’m still in training after all. Come, I’ll show you.’ he stood and offered her his hand.
Riley, not realizing the hand was for her, stood and ignored it.
Peitar withdrew his hand discreetly and led her to the hangar.
Behind them Kenis gave a melancholy sigh.
Riley arrived at the opinion that Peitar and Razra shared some similar qualities. Like Razra, Peitar often kept talking without waiting for her response. When Razra whispered, he often got too close to her ear, and Peitar suffered from the same problem. Sometimes, not even in the context of whispering, he would start getting too close to her.
Riley dealt with this by calmly moving away, as she did with Razra.
After that first day he asked to see her again. She replied by telling him she often came to the air force training centre with her unit. So while Gasannn, Geilar and Jann disappeared whenever Peitar appeared, Leili and her attractive male chatted intimately and Batar and Kenis discussed various technical things, Peitar showed Riley around the base.
Riley also noted many of the females spent a good deal of time looking at Peitar. She determined then, that Peitar was likely an attractive male, like Leili’s male. She did not consider whether she found him so, because that was clearly a human thing and important in whether the males and females paired up or not. It was not something that had anything to do with gemengs.
The sky was darkening.
Riley and Jillia leant against the dormitory Jillia called home, chatting amiably.
Jillia was difficult to track down during classes. Riley, wishing to continue her only gemeng friendship, had started visiting Jillia at the dormitories. As Razra had reacted well to her visiting him at home (though she’d had a weak invitation to continue the friendship from him) she’d decided to try with Jillia as well and had at first come to the dormitories uninvited.
‘Do you know any other gemengs from outside?’ Riley was asking. She faced away from the forest. If she looked at the forest, she couldn’t talk. The forest became everything.
‘Hmm? There are some, I’m not allowed to talk to them though.’ Jillia replied.
‘Can I talk to them?’
‘Why?’ she asked.
‘I want to know if they have arms that can’t move, and how they fight if they do.’
Jillia shrugged. ‘I know where one is.’ she stood straight, moving away from the wall. ‘Yes, alright, let’s go talk to an outsider.’
They walked three dormitories down. Inside it was dark. During the evening most of the gemengs gathered outside. The stars and moon made outside lighter than inside.
Jillia walked a little way into the dormitory, Riley following. Riley could see there were a few people in here, seemingly asleep.
Jillia padded softly down to the end of the room where a curtain was drawn.
‘Mr Bogresh?’ she called softly.
There was a slight tremor in her voice.
She didn’t call again. There was no response. She began edging back.
Then, the curtain was drawn back suddenly and silently. A dark shape loomed before them.
Jillia froze.
‘What?’ he asked, whispering without needing to get too close to anyone’s ear. His voice was gruff.
Seeing Jillia was having trouble speaking, Riley asked in a whisper, ‘Are you from outside Astar?’
Riley’s eyes had adjusted well to the dark and she saw a flash of white teeth bared in a grin that was more snarl. She resisted the urge to bare her teeth back. Aerlid had done too good a job at teaching her not to snarl.
‘I am.’
‘Can you move your arm?’ she asked. She was a little surprised that an outsider had taken a family name. Perhaps he was trying to fit in.
‘I move it well enough.’ he bared his teeth again.
Again, Riley resisted the urge to snarl.
‘What’s it like?’ Jillia suddenly asked. ‘Out there?’
The man snorted and shifted on his mat.
Riley
could make out one very muscular arm. The other she could not see.
‘Sit.’ he grunted suddenly.
Jillia immediately plopped to the ground. Riley might have thought she’d been hit if she hadn’t known better. At a more reasonable pace, Riley also sat.
‘You’re a young one, aren’t you? Family been here a few generations?’ he asked in his gruff and growly voice.
Jillia nodded then said ‘yes,’ when she realised he might not be able to see.
He grunted. ‘You young ones always complain about how the humans treat you here.’ he grumbled. ‘Then you sneak away from your parents and aunts and uncles and ask me, as if you expect me to tell you about a wonderful place where the gemengs are in charge and everything’s all great.’
‘Well you shouldn’t have come. You’re parents are right to keep you away from me. And you’re wrong about outside, about here. You wouldn’t last ten minutes in the outside. You’d be killed, or made a slave. Anyone who’s stronger than you, and there’s always someone, you’re at their mercy. And they have none. And everyone’s afraid. Afraid someone stronger will come around the corner, afraid someone they thought was weaker will turn out to be not so weak as they thought.’
‘Astar’s a paradise. And you don’t even know it, you ungrateful little wretches.’
Jillia was silent. She swallowed. Trembled. Then she looked at Riley. ‘Where would you go? If you could choose?’ her voice was hoarse.
Riley, chagrined, thinking she’d done Jillia a disservice when she’d told her the tale about the gemeng village said, reluctantly, ‘here. They pushed me out of a tree.’
‘What?’
‘The children. They pushed me out of a tree.’
Jillia’s mouth was agape, a darker hole in the darkness.
‘You’re from outside?’ almost not recognizing the voice, for it held nothing but curiosity now and none of the gruff growly snarliness, Riley realised Mr Bogresh was talking to her.
‘Yes.’ she said.
‘You asked about my arm?’
‘Yes. I’ve heard the gemengs who come from outside often can’t use one of their arms. I wanted to know how you fight.’
‘And your arm, you can move it?’
‘Yes.’ she trailed off, unsure if he would ask more.
He shifted again, another flash of teeth. Riley saw then he did have another arm, but it was small, tiny compared to the other.
‘I manage.’ he said, baring his teeth again.
Getting outside was a relief. Suddenly, they realised how tense they’d been in there.
‘You didn’t tell me that.’ Jillia said, ‘when I asked.’
Riley uneasy, didn’t say anything.
‘Tell me truly, what was it like?’
‘I wasn’t in the village long.’ she said awkwardly. ‘Most of the time we didn’t see any gemengs or humans. That time was good.’
‘So if you could go back to that…?’
Riley shrugged. She thought of the way the forest tugged at her. No, she never wanted to go back to a gemeng village. But the forest? She didn’t want to think about that.
‘He was scary.’ Jillia said. ‘If all the gemengs from outside are like that…’
‘He broke the earth.’ Riley said suddenly. ‘Olef punched the earth and it broke, all the way to our pot.’
‘What?’
Riley tried to explain.
When she had, Jillia asked about the village. So Riley tried to explain the look of the houses, the people. She even mentioned the ehlkrid deer.
Jillia was silent for a long time.
Riley looked at her earnestly, she didn’t like this silence.
‘Not much of a choice is it? I guess Astar really is the best place to be.’
Riley didn’t like that tone. It worried her. It upset her.
‘It was good,’ she said uneasily. ‘When we were alone. You can travel and not meet any gemengs. I was… I was happy then.’
There was silence for a long time.
‘Good night, Riley.’ Was all Jillia said when she finally spoke, before walking back to her dormitory. Riley upset, watched her go.
The next few days were difficult. Every gemeng she saw, she looked anxiously for any signs of what she’d heard in Jillia’s tone. Geilar didn’t seem to suffer in the same way as Jillia. Riley spent a long time watching him, more time than usual. He noticed and asked if he had something on his face. But he seemed fine. Mostly, everyone seemed fine.
But perhaps her lie was true for them. Perhaps they were good at hiding it.
It was only Maztar who looked like Jillia sounded. Riley watched him when their units trained together. When she saw him she felt sad. It was a gripping sadness that clenched the stomach, clouded the head, heavied the heart and made her eyes feel watery. But there was nothing she could do so she just noted. And that made her even sadder.
When Peitar took her to show her his plane again, Riley said to him, ‘the gemengs aren’t happy here.’
Surprise flashed across his face. ‘Isn’t that sweet, worried about the gemengs. You don’t need to worry about them though.’
‘I don’t?’ she asked, wondering if this human saw it too.
‘Yeah,’ he shrugged. ‘They’re fine.’
‘No-’ she shook her head.
‘Come now.’ he put his hands on her shoulders and she didn’t notice. ‘Don’t worry about them.’
‘But-’
Riley was too busy trying to talk to notice the moving closer, closer. Shocked, she froze.
When Peitar moved away she stood stock still.
‘Come now, don’t tell me you’ve never been kissed before, a pretty girl like you?’
Riley remained stunned.
He peered at her closely then laughed. ‘Well I guess that’s a yes, come on now, let me show you the view of the runway.’
Peitar walked and talked, but Riley paid no attention, she was busy thinking intently. No matter how she fit the pieces together they didn’t make sense. That was a human thing he did. She was a gemeng, and that sort of thing wasn’t for gemengs. She was different. Wondering if she was missing some fundamental piece of the puzzle, she rummaged through her vast stores of notes.
‘Come now, what’s wrong, you haven’t listened to a word I’ve said.’ Peitar stopped walking, his eyes on her.
Riley focussed back on him, her green eyes sharp. Best to ask him. ‘Why did you do that?’
‘Oh,’ his eyebrows rose, ‘well, because I wanted to. Why? Didn’t you like it?’
Not seeing how that was relevant Riley blinked in surprise and tried to gather herself and make sense of this.
He put a hand under her chin and tilted her head up. ‘Don’t go over thinking this. I wanted to kiss you so I did. That’s all you need to know.’
Riley frowned, she wasn’t sure she agreed.
But he did it again, that thing that was only meant for humans.
‘See? I wanted to so I did. What else do you need to know?’
‘But-’
He did it again.
He seemed very sure of it.
Perhaps it wasn’t just meant for humans?