Chapter Fourteen
A dark anger I’m usually able to keep deep within myself threatens to rise inside me. I’m forced to shove it down before I attempt to speak.
“You think I did this to her? Do I look like I’ve taken her magic?”
Ma studies me for a minute before her fear disappears and her normal stern look returns.
“I suppose not, but it doesn’t mean you weren’t somehow involved.”
“Oh, trust me, he was involved,” Cindy-Sin mutters.
“I didn’t do this.” The darkness keeps pushing in an attempt to overwhelm me as I’m forced to defend myself.
“You didn’t stop it,” she snaps back.
“Neither did you.”
“You could have stopped her from opening the bag.” She shoves a finger into my shoulder and I have to fight myself not to grab her hand and force it into a painful position.
“Right, I was in a great position to reach out and take it from her, wasn’t I?” The anger I’d developed during my time at the University is becoming nearly impossible to control. “What did you expect me to do? Throw my sword at her?”
Rose gives a little gasp at the idea. She’s well aware of the abilities of my weapon, though not aware of the situation we’re shouting about.
“You could have done something,” Sin says.
I’m done taking all of the blame “This isn’t my fault.”
“Oh, so what? It’s mine?” She’s shocked by the suggestion.
I don’t say anything, but she must know what I think from my expression.
“Oh please,” she laughs without humor. “How is this possibly my fault?”
It’s too easy to allow some of my normally locked cruelness out. “Her magic shouldn’t have been hidden from her. If she had known how to use it properly...”
“Then she’d still be like this. Though, it probably would have happened a whole lot sooner.” She’s no more willing to take the blame than I am. This argument isn’t going to come to a pleasant end.
“Enough,” Ma says in a low dangerous voice. “You two are bickering loudly enough I wouldn’t be surprised if the entire village can hear you, not to mention the wizard searching the area.”
“Sorry,” I mutter, though I continue to eye Sin, ready to pick up the argument if she persists.
She doesn’t, though she doesn’t apologize either. Her mouth clamps shut and her lips curl into a scowl.
“Your father will be home for lunch soon,” Ma announces when she’s sure we’re done, at least for now. “You’ll explain exactly what happened when he gets here. Until then, get yourselves cleaned up. You both look like you’ve been in a battle.” She dusts herself off as though she’s ridding herself of argument and turns her smile on. “Rose, dear, would you like to stay for lunch as well? Or will your Ma be worried about you?”
I don’t wait to hear what her answer is. Instead I shove my way out of the tiny room and into the much larger common area. It’s only when I’m in the middle of the space I feel like I can breathe. Compared to the container Lou kept me in, the bedroom is large, even with so many people in it. Without the constant fear of my life being on the line out-weighing the fear of being trapped, my room feels a hundred times worse.
When I notice I’m being watched, I straighten and act normally.
“What’s wrong with you?” Sin says.
“Nothing.” I can’t quite meet her eye, but I can tell she’s studying me, as though trying to figure out my actions.
“Whatever.” She nods back in the direction of my room. “So, I guess we’re supposed to clean up or something. Is there a river where I’m supposed to go?”
I give her a puzzled look and point to a door at the far end of the house. “Washroom. You can use it like a normal person.”
“Oh.” She stares in the direction of the door. “Right. But, really? You have washrooms in this reality? With working toilets and running water and stuff?”
I’m surprised she has to ask. “Don’t you?”
“But, you guys all dress funny, almost medievalish.” She waves her hand up and down at my clothes “And you carry around a sword. You’re saying you have indoor plumbing. Don’t tell me you have electricity too.”
“Have what?” I ask.
“You don’t know what electricity is but you have running water.” Her amazement continues to grow. “How?”
I’m surprised she has to ask. “Magic, obviously.”
For the first time since I’ve met her, Sin is completely speechless.
For about three seconds.
“What? Magic? How?” She looks around as though expecting to see a wizard stashed in a corner somewhere. “You don’t have the power to make water run, and if your sister’s like mine, then who’s casting the spell? Does everyone have magical running water in their houses? Magic? Really?”
I brace myself, knowing she’s not going to be pleased with what I have to say. “Yes everyone has it, well at least those who can afford it. And I suppose there are people who refuse to pay wizards for the services for moral reasons.” These people were often hunted down and caused to disappear within a short time, but I don’t mention as much. Most people aren’t aware of that particular atrocity, and I have no interest in being the one to tell people, especially my family. They don’t need to know any more of what I was associated with. “But I’d say the majority of people have at least basic magic in their house.”
“But... wizards?” She looks desperate for me to tell her it’s all a big joke. I wish I could. “Why would they use their magic to give normal people running water?”
“So they can control us,” Rose says. “We all rely on their ‘generosity’ and are willing to pay whatever they ask for it, even if the price is someone’s life.”
“And you all use their magic? After everything they’ve done?” Sin’s talking to me, but I can’t answer. She’s brought back the guilt I had been dealing with since what happened to Loraine.
“We do what we must to carry on,” Ma says. “And we don’t waste time worrying about things we can’t control.” Her smile returns as she pats Sin on the shoulder as though that will make everything alright. “Now go get cleaned up. I’ve left one of Loraine’s dresses in the washroom for you. Leave the clothes you’re wearing in Aldric’s room. I’ll wash them for you.”
Sin stares at me in disbelief. “You expect me to use the water, after everything we’ve dealt with?”
Again, I can’t quite meet her eyes. I understand exactly how she feels; after all I felt the same way after Loraine. But Ma’s right, we do what we must.
“I’m sorry,” I say. “It’s the way things are here.”
She stares at each of us in turn, her mouth slightly open in shock. Finally she says, “Well, that just sucks,” and storms off to the washroom.
My eyes shift from the door she slammed, to the one for my bedroom. “It truly does,” I whisper to myself.
“Look at what you’ve done to your tunic.” Ma examines me a little closer. “I won’t be able to patch it properly, you know. You’ll see the stitches. We’d have to pay for magic to hide it, and with the prices being what they are, we might as well buy a cow and make our own leather.”
I mimic her as she leaves for the kitchen, causing Rose to giggle. I grin back at her and, for a moment, life is exactly how it used to be. I half expect Loraine to come around the corner and tell on me.
Loraine. I turn to her bedroom door and my shoulders sag. I need to see her. I promised myself I would check on her every day after what happened to make sure her situation never grew worse and with some naive hope things might get better.
Without bothering to explain myself, I head toward the door. Part of me expects Rose to follow since she hasn’t left my side since our world’s version of Lou’s grandmother’s house. Maybe she can sense I need to be alone, though she’s never held back before. For whatever reason, she stays put.
Loraine’s room is slightly
larger than mine, with space for a closet along with her desk and bed. I open the closet first, not quite able to bring myself to look at her yet, and find a few of my clothes tucked in the corner behind her much larger selection.
From the tiny collection, I choose a black shirt with long arms I push up past my elbows. I pull on a heavy leather tunic over top, thicker than the one Lou cut through, and meant to protect against minor knife attacks. I haven’t worn it in over a year.
While I’m buckling my sword back onto my hip, I turn to Loraine.
“I know, I know. You hate when I change in your room. Sorry, but mine is kind of in use at the moment.”
It takes a lot of effort, but I’m finally able to bring myself to look at her. Her skin has turned pale in the past year; at least compared to her usual tan from being outside every second Ma allowed. Her hair is perfectly brushed and fanned around her head on the pillow, a sure sign Ma’s recently been here. Her light blue eyes are open and stare blankly at the ceiling. I wish they’d stay closed.
“You’d like her, I think,” I say. “She’s a sorceress too. Like you. You might like her sister. Actually, no, you’d probably love her sister. You two would become best friends so you could both better torture me.”
She would have laughed. She should have laughed.
“I have to go. But I promise I will fix this. I’ll fix you both.”
I turn to leave and nearly walk into Sin who’s leaning against the doorframe.
“What?” I demand before I notice her expression is much softer than I’d ever seen it, though maybe only because she’d washed off her dark makeup.
“Your sister?”
“Yes.”
She nods slowly. “How long?”
I know exactly what she’s talking about. “A bit over a year.”
There’s a touch of sympathy in her eyes as she asks, “Who did it to her?”
I don’t answer at first. It’s not something I like to remember, but if we’re going to work together to help them, then she should know the truth. Besides, if she stays in the village for any length of time, she’ll find out on her own.
“My best friend.”
Her eyebrows raise, but she doesn’t say anything. She simply waits for the rest of the story.
“We grew up together, were trained together. For most of our time at the University, we were roommates.” I remember Fitzroy’s mysterious grin everything he came up with a new idea to get us in trouble. Even with the overly organized and suffocating routine of the University, every day was an adventure with Fitzroy. “He was the only other one there who questioned all of the things the wizards told us. So, when we turned eighteen and graduated, rather than ask for an assignment, we left and came here.
“Loraine liked him immediately. He followed his training perfectly.”
I stop, not able to say anything more as I once again think of the warning signs I should have noticed before his betrayal. I should have seen it coming, and Sin’s sure to agree with everyone else who believes I should have been able to stop it. She’d blame me, like everyone else. She’d say I shouldn’t have brought him, and it’s only because I didn’t care about my sister the whole situation occurred.
“Were you doing the same?” Her stare is unforgiving as she says the words. “Following your training with Lou?”
The muscles in my shoulders grow tense at the accusation. Not what I expected her to think.
“I could have taken her magic,” I tell her. Her surprise makes me smile. “After she made me normal sized again. There was more than enough time before you came into the room.”
She considers me for a moment, but her anger doesn’t fade. Instead, it seems to grow worse.
“Fine.” Sin crosses her arms and leans against the door frame “Your sister had her magic sucked out of her, and you’re pissed off about it. But you want the magic. You still have the voice in your head telling you to ‘take it all.’ Even if we are somehow able to fix Lou, what’s to say you won’t take her magic all over again?”
I step closer to better loom over her. I’ve had people run from me when I was less angry, but she stands her ground and never once flinches as I lean over her.
“I will never take a sorceress’s magic.” I have been so sure of anything in my life. “And I will never hurt Lou.”
“And if you ever do,” she says equally firmly. “Know I will hunt you down and destroy you.”
We stand there for a minute, neither of us willing to back down, and neither of us willing to look away.
“Well then,” Father says from behind Sin. “Now you’ve gotten your threats out of the way, anyone care to explain what’s going on?”