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“Thank you. ” Julietta didn’t know if she was making a bigger mistake recruiting Max. Her husband could lose his temper and slip even further away from her, but she trusted her gut. It had never failed in business. Time to put her instincts to the test in her personal life.
Max gave her shoulder a squeeze. “Sawyer is one tough son of a bitch. He’s going to be okay. you probably knocked him sideways with his feelings for you. He’s obviously fallen hard, and he’s never committed to anyone before, let alone marriage. ”
She forced a smile. “I hope you’re right. ”
Please don’t leave us, Sawyer. We need you.
Chapter Seventeen
Sawyer made his way toward the basement and followed the sounds of grunting. Three a. m. The time of night terrors and ghosts that took flight. He pushed open the door and found Wolfe in the middle of the mat, going at the punching bag like rocky in the final round with Apollo Creed.
Sweat gleamed from Wolfe’s skin. His focus told a deeper story, and Sawyer felt a pang at how distant he’d been lately with the boy. He’d missed workouts this week, not ready to face him while he wondered about the status of his marriage.
Wolfe didn’t deserve to be around emotional conflict or deal with his whiny shit. He deserved more than that.
Sawyer dropped his bottle of water and towel, waiting for him to finish.
Wolfe tore off the gloves and panted for breath.
“Nice jabs. But your hooks still suck. ” Sawyer waited for his smart-mouthed comeback, but the boy ignored him.
He turned his back and grabbed his own bottle of water, chugging it down. “Hard night?”
Wolfe wiped his mouth and glared at him. “What do you care?”
Sawyer jerked back. “Listen, I’m sorry I missed a few of our sessions. you know work has been killing me. Purity has to come first. ”
“Got no problem with that. Just don’t like lies. ”
He frowned. “I’m not lying. I can’t let up until opening, and even then the first year will take everything I got. I thought you were on board with that. ”
Blue eyes glittered with banked rage. “you think I’m stupid, man? you think I don’t know you’re thinking of taking off?” He gave a bark of laughter. “I’m the king of that move, so don’t try to pretend it’s about Purity. It’s about Julietta. Me. Us, together. This whole thing is not working for you, and you got itchy feet. Fine, I don’t give a shit. Just be a man and tell us to our faces instead of this bullshit about work. ”
The ground roared up and swallowed him whole.
Sickness churned his stomach. Dear God, Wolfe believed he was cutting out on him, just like everyone did in his life beforehand. He shook his head hard and took a step forward. “Listen, Wolfe, you’re wrong. Dead wrong. I am not leaving you, and I never will. We’re a team going forward.
I’m just going through some shit with Julietta, but I’ll figure it out. ”
Wolfe made a low growl deep in his throat and backed off. “Lie. I see the way you look at me now, at her. Like you can’t wait to get away from us. We remind you of something we’ll never be able to fix. It’s just a matter of time before you bolt. But I’m not waiting around for it. I like Julietta; she’s given me more respect than I ever had, other than you. She makes me want to do better. I’m not going to hang around while you tear her apart and then start on me. I’ve been down this road, man. I’m done. ”
Panic hit. Sawyer scrambled for balance. “you’re important to me, damnit! I don’t want you to leave, and I’m not going to bolt. even if this thing doesn’t work out with Julietta, I’ll never let you down. I can’t let anyone else down again!”
The boy studied him in the dim light. Foo Fighters blared in the background. In those endless blue depths, Sawyer saw a deep truth that shook him. An understanding and disappointment so ingrained there was nothing he’d be able to utter to wipe away the doubts.
Because Sawyer knew the boy was right.
He was a liar. He couldn’t live in his own skin any longer, especially with everything he loved and dreamed of and hoped for right in front of him. A wife he loved. A son to care for. A home and a family. everything he’d never believed in, so he was taking off before it could blow up in his face.
Wolfe twisted his lips and hung the towel around his neck. “I understand, man. you’re not letting us down; you’re just doing what we all do. Coping. I was wrong to believe there was something more. Not your fault. ” He walked past him toward the door. “I’ll finish up until Purity opens, then I’m going back to New york. Don’t jerk Julietta around anymore. Not when you already have your mind made up to leave. ”
Wolfe disappeared.
Sawyer dropped to the bench and slumped against the wall. His instincts roared at him to go after Wolfe and prove the boy wrong. Drag Julietta out of bed and admit his cowardice, tell her he’d fight for her, for Wolfe, for all of them. But all he heard was his foster father’s taunt-ing words reminding him over and over he’d never be enough. Gossip would be gleeful, especially considering his current limelight with his new hotel chain. The press had been trying to hook him up for years, and any nega-tive story would involve Julietta and eventually La Dolce Famiglia. And what about Wolfe? What if they discovered the boy lived with them and they began prying into his past? He couldn’t risk it.
Letting them go might be the biggest gift he had to offer.
They deserved everything.
Sawyer rose from the bench and headed toward the free weights. He wouldn’t come out of the room until his body was completely drained and shaking with exhaustion.
Maybe then he’d find a sliver of peace.
…
He walked the site and took note of the new developments with a tingle of pride. His vision shimmered before him, almost complete. The details were finally coming together to complete a portrait of exotic lushness paired with an envi-ronment that welcomed travelers home, with all the mod-ern luxuries, from a dedicated technology and video room for business executives needing to Skype and hold online meetings, to the pampering spa, pools, hot tubs, and steam rooms. The rich textures of polished marble, glittering crystals, plush velvet, and rich mahogany conjured old and new worlds. He’d used his private art collection to make sure the main rooms inspired, like a high-class art gallery for his guests.
Sawyer closed his eyes for a moment and pictured the hotel full, his dream finally complete. And wondered why the culmination of his goal beat like a hole in his heart.
empty. Void. Dead.
“Hey, it’s looking good, man. ”
Sawyer turned toward Max. A flicker of guilt trickled through him. Blowing off the family dinner had been a visible slap in the face to Julietta and everyone else. Wishing he knew a different way to handle it, Sawyer shook Max’s hand and forced a smile. “Thanks. Listen, sorry I couldn’t do dinner last night. Got caught up in the office. Hope you understand. ”
“Sure. We’ve all been there, especially around a new opening. Can I talk to you a sec?”
Warning bristled his nerves. “Sorry, got a meeting.
Maybe later. ”
“Just a minute. Please?”
Coldness seeped through his veins. “okay. ” He led Max up the stairs and into the shell of what would be his private office. The empty room was devoid of furniture and details, confirming it couldn’t be a long talk. “What’s up?”
“Julietta told me what was going on with you. Blackmail.
Not any details, just the bare bones of some asshole with threats. Wanted to see if you needed any help. ”
“Appreciate the gesture. But I got it handled. Thanks. ”
He began walking out, but Max didn’t move. Sawyer’s heart stuttered in an uneven rhythm. “Not done yet,” Max said. Sawyer stiffened in preparation. “See, I don’t think you have it handled. I think you believe you’re in this alone and need to fix something from years ago that you had no control over.
Problem is, you’re married to Julietta now. you’re stuck with a family, and we don’t let one of our own deal with this shit alone. you probably know as many people as I do, but not the same type. I know a guy. So this is how it’s gonna work. you give me a name. And you don’t get con-tacted again. Capisce?”
In the Twilight Zone of the conversation, Sawyer’s lip quirked with humor. “Did you really say the words ‘I know a guy’? Have I been recruited into a bad episode of Mobsters?”
Max didn’t smile. “I’m not fucking around, Sawyer. ”
He realized his friend was dead serious. “Thanks for the offer, but I’m handling it. ”
“By pulling away from your wife? From Wolfe? By tor-turing yourself with what-ifs you can’t change?”
“How much did she tell you?”
Max shrugged. “Not much. But I’ve known you for a long time. We’ve been friends awhile, and though we don’t talk about your past, I’m not an idiot. I know shit happened.
I know who you are today and what type of man you be-came. That’s what matters. ”
The truth hit him in the face like a belly flop. “Jesus, I didn’t expect this heart-to-heart. ” His nerves rubbed raw against the look on Max’s face. A need to share and to trust him rose up. “you were wrong, Max,” he said softly. “I’m not good enough. Julietta needs someone who can make her happy. Love her the way she deserves. Keep her safe.
It’s not me. ”
“yes it is. But you gotta believe it before it can happen. ” Max leaned against the empty wall. “When Carina and I finally got together, we had a lot of work to do. We played this ridiculous game of back-and-forth. I didn’t think I could ever be good enough for her. She was a woman meant for family, marriage, a commitment. But she never let up until I caved. When we got married, I realized it’s not about being good enough. It’s just about loving them enough to want to be good enough. We all deserve that shot. especially you. By the time I got my act together, Carina had gone through the same thing. Not believing in herself or who she was. It took a while, but she got there, and I waited. See, there’s no perfect person out there for Julietta, dude. you’re already screwed. She loves you, and when one of the Conte sisters falls, you don’t get away.
you can run as far and fast as you want, but I bet she’ll be waiting for you when you get there. ” Max shook his head.
“They are some seriously scary women when they want someone. ”
Max’s words dived deep and latched on. A crazy flicker of hope lit. “I don’t know. ”
“I figured. Listen, we leave for the airport tonight.
Would be nice for you to see us out. I know Michael and Nick wanted to say good-bye. Flight’s at six. Come on by real quick when you’ve had some time to think about it. See, we take care of each other, no strings attached. Whether you want the help or not, Sawyer, you got it. Not only do I know ‘a guy,’ but I have some excellent lawyers, too. Hope to see you later. ”