Yu sighed and after a brief hesitation, she responded, “You are obviously not aware of our Government’s one child policy or how important it is to our culture that we must produce a son.”
She continued nervously, “I should not be telling you this but you would find out some time.”
Gina put her hand over the hand of Yu, “Please Yu, I want to understand.”
Yu pulled her hand away and stared down at the uneaten food on her plate.
Gina held her breath and waited.
Yu began to speak, “You have to understand that in our culture it is important we produce sons. It is expected that a son will support his parents in their aging years. Sons follow in the father’s profession and in some cases actually replace the father at the company where he works. When they marry, they bring a wife into the family to assist with the chores and she brings with her a healthy dowry. Sons are expected to become educated and provide for the family,” she paused and took a bite of her food.
Warming to her topic, she continued, “Girls on the other hand, are merely considered to be a burden financially on the household and are taught only the basic skills needed to attract a husband. As they use up resources that must be used to raise valuable sons, they are usually provided with only minimal amounts of food and clothing whereas sons are provided with whatever it takes to attract a future wife from a wealthy family. As soon as girls are of age to marry, usually quite young, they are married off. This causes additional drains on the family because when they leave they take their physical services but also additional financial resources from the family in the form of a dowry. For poor people, this could lead to financial ruin for some of them.”
She stopped talking briefly to allow Gina to absorb the information.
She again continued, “Because of the importance of sons, at one time families had many children so they could ensure their future security. The Government seeing the increased sizes of families decided we as a nation were growing too quickly and that if we continued to grow at the same rate, the resources needed to maintain the society would not be sustainable and they instituted a very restrictive law that only allowed couples to have one child. In addition, they even went so far as to punish those who defied this law. We are even told when we can have one.”
Yu put up her hand to stop Gina from speaking. “I know what you are thinking but initially they were trying to do what they thought was best for us as a nation, unfortunately they did not think through the consequences of their actions. They have since tried to relax the law to provide for circumstances where you can have more than one child but not everyone can qualify for the relaxation. That is what is causing this problem.
"If the child is a girl, the young couple are shamed before their families and neighbours and they must face this added pressure to rid themselves of the unwanted legacy. I know it seems cruel to outsiders but you must understand this has been part of our way of life for many generations. This new generation still faces the same fears their ancestors felt, if they keep this female infant and can’t produce a son they face an uncertain future.
"Some couples have only a few options: terminate the pregnancy if they know it’s a girl, try to cause a miscarriage, leave the baby at an orphanage, starve the child to death, or cause its death by other means. Without a living child, they can then try again to produce a son.
"The Government has up to now, turned a blind eye to this practice but they will not be able to do this for much longer as there is becoming a critical shortage of young women for our sons to marry and they are being forced to go outside of our country to find wives. In some cases, they are actually kidnapping women from other countries to provide wives.”
Gina stared at her. “Don’t these people realize girls are quite capable of looking after aging families just as well as boys and that more and more girls are now receiving the education they need to get careers? Many women run companies and hold very prominent positions in Government. I know many young women who support their families through regular jobs.”
Yu nodded. “I understand this, as do many in the larger cities, but here in the poorer communities they still cling to the old ways. Out here, education and acceptance are slow to be adopted.”
Gina met Yu’s eyes and held them. “Do you know if people in this village are doing this?”
Yu looked away. “I do not know for sure.”
Gina suspected that Yu was not being honest with her but decided to let it go for now.
Gina nodded, deep in thought. “I wonder if we should consider putting on some information sessions to try to reach these people. Would you help me Yu, you know these people better than I do.”
Yu shook her head. “You are new to our ways and do not understand what could happen if you try to make changes. There are many reasons to force foreigners to leave. I do not think this will work and you would need to get the permission of the local officials in order to do this. That could take a long time and probably a lot of money. Favours don’t come cheap here.”
Gina responded, “This would be an educational initiative and would not interfere with the Government policies. Anyway, let me think more about how we can do it. Let’s finish this food before it gets any colder.” She smiled.
After Yu left, Gina sat alone, staring off into space trying to decide what she should do. It wasn’t until hours later, when Darren came home, that she realized that she needed to do something, whether the Government agreed or not. She could not let this happen any longer.
Darren realized that there was something wrong when he entered the small cottage.
“What is it Gina?” he asked, coming to sit beside her.
Gina smiled sadly at Darren. “I need to save the babies.” This was all she could say.
He nodded, not understanding. “Um, okay...can you give me a hint? Why do you need to save the babies?” he asked quietly.
Tears filled her eyes and she dropped her head. “Do you know why there are so few girls in this village and in all of this country?” she asked him.
He shook his head, not sure where was she was going with this conversation.
She responded, “They’re killing them.”
“Who’s killing them?” he was even more confused.
“The parents of these baby girls,” Gina said.
Darren asked, “Why would they do that?”
Her tears flowed down her face unnoticed and unheeded as she poured out the story Yu had shared with her.
Darren held her in his arms and let her cry. After a few minutes, she gently pushed away.
“Did you find out anything at the hospital? What did Dr. Dhanji say?” she asked him.
He nodded. “It definitely makes more sense now with what you just told me.” He continued, “It seems that Dhanji is helping these villagers, whether on purpose or not. He has been doing many abortions, far more than I would have expected. The other thing that seems a bit out of the ordinary is when I perform an ultrasound the first question asked is whether it’s a boy. I usually get questions on the sex of the baby, but not specifically, on whether it is a boy, normally most women want to know if it is healthy first. I have not actually talked to him yet about this, I got this information from the files.”
He added, “The other thing I found a bit coincidental is that once I have told the women that their babies are healthy and the sex, if it is a boy the women seem more relieved than happy and alternatively sad when I tell them it is a girl. They seem to deflate. From the files it seems a lot of the women I told were having healthy baby girls were scheduled for abortions within a few days.”
Darren took her hand. “We will need to proceed with this very carefully. We don’t want to be expelled from the country before we can do some good. I think what we could do is put on some basic educational sessions in the evening that don’t go against their policies. I’m going to talk to Dr. Dhanji about it. What about Yu, is there any way she can help us get the villagers to attend?”
/> Gina shook her head. “I asked her about it today, but she didn’t seem to want to get involved. I’ll talk to her again tomorrow. Okay we have a plan so let’s leave this for now. Tomorrow we can start to put together a presentation for the villagers. Now, let’s make dinner.” Gina got to her feet and dragged Darren up with her.
********
Darren greeted Dr. Dhanji early the next morning with a cup of steaming coffee. “Can we talk?”
“Of course, please sit down. What is on your mind?” asked Dr. Dhanji, his smile welcoming.
“I would like to know why we are performing so many abortions on women who are expecting baby girls.” Darren came straight to the point.
Dr. Dhanji put down his coffee cup and his smile faded. “Ah, I see you have noticed. What can I tell you, it is their custom to have baby boys? If I do not help them terminate these baby girls, they will go elsewhere or do it themselves. When I first came here, I would not do abortions on healthy babies but within days, I found I was treating the mother for injuries caused by them trying to abort the baby themselves. I decided it would be better to terminate the pregnancy properly instead of causing more grief or even death to the mother by my refusal.”
Darren asked, “Have you tried to talk them out of it? Don’t they realize that girls are more than capable of performing the same honourable duties as boys these days?”
Dr. Dhanji nodded. “I do try to talk them out of it but without success. Their husbands and families are pressuring them. I don’t think they have much choice, especially with the one-child policy. Only a son will do for these people.”
Darren had been expecting this response. “Would you be willing to help Gina and I put on some information sessions? Maybe with more education, they can make decisions that are more informed. Knowledge can make you stronger. If we can save even one more girl, then we start to win the fight.”
Dr. Dhanji looked sceptical but agreed.
“Let’s get together tonight after work and start to work on a plan. Come to supper at our home, Gina loves entertaining.” Darren pressed, not wanting to lose Dr. Dhanji's support.
He agreed and they went back to work.
********
Gina looked around the small schoolroom and felt sad. So many wasted lives and these young children knew nothing about it. She wished she could teach them the value of life and the value of both girls and boys but her mandate was to teach the curriculum as set out by the Government, nothing more and nothing less. She sighed and began the lessons.
When lunchtime came, she sought out Yu. “Let’s sit outside and enjoy the sun today.”
Yu seemed reluctant but agreed.
“I talked to Darren last night about what we talked about yesterday,” Gina began.
Yu looked down at her sandwich, not wanting to meet Gina’s eyes.
“We would like to go forward with a few information sessions for the villagers. Would you be able to help us get them to come?” Gina felt a direct question was the only way she would be able to get Yu to respond to her.
“I understand your concern Gina," Yu stated, "but I am just one woman and you have already seen how we are treated. I will help you where I can to prepare a presentation and I will talk to those that I think could make a difference, but I make no promises that people will come. They do not trust outsiders who wish to interfere with their customs and traditions.”
“Thank you Yu. Can you come to the house tonight so we can start to put something together? Darren will certainly appreciate your ideas. Would you like to come for dinner, I rarely get to cook for guests these days. It would be nice to have you.”
“I will let my parents know,” she nodded in acceptance.
Gina was looking forward to dinner and hurried home to plan the menu. She always made extra so she was not concerned when Darren came home with Dr. Dhanji. She welcomed him to their home and shortly after their arrival, Yu knocked on the door.
Gina served the fish with a light lemon batter, along with rice seasoned with fresh herbs and baby carrots. The buns were light and warm, and the butter at room temperature so it would melt into the warmth of the buns. For desert, she served fresh fruit. A light white wine helped set the mood for such a pleasant meal.
Unfortunately, after clearing the table they became serious as they discussed the best way to present such a sober topic as the death of so many young girls.
By the end of the evening, they had drafted a basic outline of topics they felt were important to teach the villagers of the importance of all babies, boys, and girls. They needed to try to teach them customs and traditions should evolve with new times. They needed to show to them that girls were able to learn and be educated the same as boys and that with this education they would be able to provide families with the security they expected from their sons. Show them some of the powerful women of the world and let them come to understand how the world has changed. They would need to find some powerful women in their own country to show them even the Government valued women.
Over the next few weeks Darren and Dr. Dhanji spent their time talking to the women they were treating to discourage them from taking such an extreme measure as abortion to rid themselves of baby girls, but they had limited success and Dr. Dhanji continued to perform the procedures. Darren chose not to perform the procedures but continued to tend to the other medical needs of the villagers. They hoped once they started to provide education and knowledge, some of these women would make different choices.
Meanwhile, Gina and Yu embarked on a campaign to encourage the villagers to attend the sessions, hoping they could convince enough influential people to come.
The evening of the first session found both Darren and Gina nervous but hopeful that they would have a good turnout. They had worked hard to prepare for this evening. They made their way to the schoolhouse, and met up with Dr. Dhanji and Yu who were waiting for them.
As they waited, the time for the session to start came and went and the foursome felt discouraged. They agreed to wait a little longer hoping someone would show up. Just as they had given up hope, the door opened and people started to show up. They looked around the room and then settled on the floor mats silently waiting. There were about twenty people sitting on the floor in front of them, a mix of men and women, some of the women were visibly pregnant others held their hands against their stomachs as if to protect what was inside.
The session went well and there were many questions from the group. One young woman clearly moved squeezed Gina’s hand as she left the room. She whispered, “Thank you,” as she passed, worriedly looking towards a man who had already reached the door. It must be her husband, Gina thought to herself. She had noticed the young man as he sat through the session his arms crossed and his face lined with stress. Gina was sure this young couple were facing a dilemma and she hoped they had been able to provide them with some comfort and help.
The next day Gina was just cleaning up the schoolroom when there was a knock on the door. Gina called to the person to come in and was very surprised to see the same young woman.
“I hope that I am not disturbing you?” she said timidly.
“Of course not, please come in. How can I help you?” Gina smiled at the young woman.
The young woman began, “I was hoping that you could help us,” her hands held against her belly.
“Let’s sit outside in the back. There are some chairs back there.” Gina led the young girl outside.
Once seated, Gina waited patiently for the woman to speak.
“When you said girls were treated differently in other countries do you think things will change here by the time my little girl is old enough to go to school?” she began.
Gina responded, “I have no way of knowing what the future will bring but I can tell you that with your country becoming such a big player in the World, anything is possible. Would you mind telling me your name?”
“I am Ai.”
“What a pretty name. What does it mean???
? Gina asked.
The young woman smiled, “In your language, it would mean 'love'.”
Gina smiled back. “Well Ai, from what I have read the restriction on the one-child policy has been relaxed and having a girl is not as much of a stigma as it used to be. In the big cities, girls are equal to boys, but unfortunately, there are still a lot of families who are unwilling to give up on the ways of the past.
"Each new generation will face these choices and it will not be easy. You will continue to face opposition from those who believe you must follow the old traditions.
"I wish I could help you more Ai, but it really must be a choice that you and your husband should make together and your choice should be only yours, not your families, friends, or neighbours. It must come from your heart as it is a decision that will be with you all of your lives.
"Together we can stop the slaughter of the innocents. We just need to take the first steps as sisters of destiny."
Ai nodded and stood up. She hugged Gina and walked away.
********
Later that day Ai felt a need for solitude, a chance to get in touch with her feelings so she went for a walk along the stream.