Chapter 12.
At the door of the Marak farmhouse, Kathy collected herself, trying to forget about work and her scene at the grocery store. Father Dimer's consolation faded after she interacted with Josh. But she felt obligated to pay Renee a visit, for two reasons.
"Come in, Kathy, please. Come out of the rain." Renee held open the screen door. "Rhea, I'm so glad to see you."
The girls entered the house with their heads down, pulling off their raincoats and setting them aside.
"They've come to do some chores for you," said Kathy.
"I see," said Renee, nodding and following Kathy's parental cues.
"And they have something that they would like to say to you and Ray."
Renee said, "He's not here. I can relay it to Ray if they want to tell me."
Kathy said, "Dawn?"
"I'm sorry for knocking down your corn, Mrs. Marak."
Rhea said, "I'm sorry for playing in the field."
"Rhea, what else."
"I hope Mr. Marak is not hurt. I didn't mean for him to get hurt."
"He's just fine," said Renee. "He's too hard-headed to know that his foot hurts. And he knows you were just playing in the field."
"What about his leg?" asked Kathy.
"A sprain. And some skin. He's using a cane today."
Kathy asked, "Do you have any chores that the girls can do for you?"
"I'm sure we can find something," said Renee, trying to read her cousin's face. "I have a whole pile of apples that need to be peeled. Can you girls peel apples?" She looked at Kathy, whose face turned sour at the idea of them working with a knife. Renee said, "I had Jacob peeling them when he was Rhea's age."
"Is there anything less pointy that they can do for you? After last night, I just have a fear…"
"How about we fill the Halloween treat bags instead? Follow me," said Renee, showing the kids to a closet where she had two large baskets of candy and a stack of small paper sacks. Kathy and Renee lugged them into the kitchen. "I'll do the first one with you," said Renee.
Kathy and Renee showed Dawn and Rhea how much to put in each bag. The toddler, Bryce, wandered off into the living room. Kathy nudged Renee and said, "I need to speak to you."
"Certainly," said Renee. "Dawn, you're in charge. Rhea, just keep doing what you're doing. I won't mind if you make a couple of big bags for yourselves to take home."
The women walked into the living room where Bryce had found a stack of magazines and tore out several pages. Kathy reached out to stop him, but Renee said, "Don't worry about it, those are old. Never get to reading them anyway."
"I am losing my mind," Kathy said.
"Sit down then."
"And I'm very upset about something, Renee. Who did you talk to about what happened last night?"
"Tell?" Renee repeated. "I didn't tell anyone."
"Come on, Renee, I know you told someone."
"Why? How do you know?" asked Renee.
"Because the whole town knows about it already."
Renee thought for a moment. "I told Ethan. I called him around one o'clock in the morning, I suppose. But he didn't get here until a few hours ago."
"Who else?"
"That's it."
"How can that be the only person you told? Estelle already knew this morning?"
"After I collected Ray last night, we came straight home. I put him in the tub and listened to him complain until he fell asleep around midnight. Then we woke again and chatted until morning – neither of us could sleep. At four-thirty this morning, I had to get up and milk the cows. So unless Ethan or Ray told the town, I don't know. I don't know, Kathy."
Kathy seethed and tapped her foot on the carpet. "Only three people knew about it. Ray. You. And me. And I thought at the very least, we three could keep a secret."
"Unless Ethan called his friends," said Renee, touching her chest, "I didn't tell anyone else. And you know Ray. He thinks gossips deserve a special place in hell. He doesn't talk to anyone, other than the cows and the Lord." Renee paused. "Who did you tell last night?"
"No one," said Kathy. "Why would I tell anyone? It's the embarrassment of my life."
"You didn't call anyone? Or did a neighbor see it?"
"The neighbor couldn't have known. I mean, I only called Josh at the bar and told him to come home."
"At the bar?"
"Yes."
"You told Josh," said Renee, "and he was at the bar."
"Yes, of course I told him."
"At the bar."
She paused as Renee's implication dawned on her. "He wouldn't have said anything."
"It only takes one person," said Renee, "especially at the bar. News spreads like a grease fire in there."
Kathy put her hands on her cheeks. "He was with his friends. God, it was him. My own husband." She pinched the bridge of her nose. "Jesus, I hate this place. I hate it here."
Renee patted her back. "Now, now. I know my house is smaller than yours."
Kathy was not consoled. "I mean this town."
"This cloud will go away," said Renee. "You just have to endure a few days of being the center of attention."
"Or months."
"Or months."
"I don't know how I ended up so pathetic," said Kathy, ignoring Renee's attempt to protest. "I remember when I was young and wanted to do things, to live and see new places. To do everything and be exciting, to never be dull. And instead I live the most ordinary of lives."
"Nothing pathetic about your life, it's just fine." Renee said, "It wasn't a very specific plan, this exciting life you imagined, was it?"
"Not exactly."
"Maybe that was the problem. Don't think you are the only one who had different expectations. I would bet you could stop any person on the road and if they would give you a straight answer, they would say that what happened, and what they thought would happen, doesn't match."
"But it was my life," said Kathy. "It was me. I was supposed to be different."
"Do you know the saying, 'life is what happens when you're busy making other plans'? That's what happened."
"You mean kids happened."
"Yes. Kids, of course. But you are a lot like me."
"I'm like you?" Kathy said.
"Don't invent an excuse to be unhappy, Kathy. I gave up on fantasies. And if you really wanted the adventure you sought, you could have left the bank before you had kids. You could have moved even after you had kids. Heck, you could move today. Didn't Josh always want to move to Chicago and work at one of the big banks?"
"I don't know what he wants anymore. I don't even know him."
"There you go again," said Renee. "You don't know what you want because you keep looking."
"You sound like my mother."
"Bryce, no," shouted Dawn from the kitchen. "Mom, he's throwing the candy on the floor!"
Renee said, "Why don't I watch the kids for a while. You can rest. I can make them dinner, even supper if you like. There's always something to do out here. They can rake leaves. Or Ethan can show them the calves."
"Bryce!"
"I'm coming," shouted Kathy, getting up from her seat. She said to Renee, "Josh and I will be having a word this afternoon."
"I don't blame you," said Renee. "He tattled. That should have stayed within the walls of your house. Show him your claws."
"Oh, I will."