Aiden walked up to me, and for a couple of moments, we just stood there, nearly toe to toe, neither of us speaking. How many times in the past had we ended up in this stance? More times than I could count. Usually we’d be seconds away from going at each other’s throats. We did not have the greatest past together, but the last time I’d seen him . . . I saw a man who was broken.
Now I saw a man who was whole.
“There’s a couple of things I need to tell you, and then there’s something I need to ask you.” Aiden lowered his chin as he spoke. “I know you aren’t exactly thrilled that we’re here, but Alex has been waiting to see you since she found out what you did. I know you don’t want to hear it, but I’m going to say it, and the next time Alex goes to say it, you’re going to let her do just that.”
I opened my mouth, but he went on. “We owe you everything and we know that. And I know you don’t want to hear this, but thank you. Thank you for what you did for us.”
Mouth clamped shut, I fixed my gaze on the wall.
“We won’t forget that,” he added, and then after a pause, “even if there are days—months, and probably years—where I wish I could forget that.”
I huffed out a laugh as I looked back at him. “I really don’t like you, Aiden.”
His lips twitched. “Good. Because I still don’t like you either.”
“Perfect.” I started to back up. “Anything else, Saint?”
“Yeah. Just one more thing.” Aiden’s eyes turned gunmetal gray. “Are you still connected to Alex?”
“Why don’t you ask her?”
“I’m asking you.”
I drew in a deep breath. There was no point in lying. “Yeah. Yeah, I am.”
Chapter 15
Josie
“This is kind of weird,” Colin stated as he stared out over the nearly empty cafeteria. “It’s like a ghost ship. Well, maybe a ghost cafeteria.”
Holding my plate of bacon and bottle of apple juice, I had to agree that this was weird. Normally there were a lot more students in the cafeteria on Sunday morning. Right now, I could count on both hands how many were actually in the room, and they were pures.
Pures who watched us warily as we sat at a small round table near the windowed wall overlooking the statues of the eleven remaining Olympian gods. I could feel their stares as I screwed the lid off my juice.
What was also weird was that Luke and Deacon were normally waiting for us in the lobby of the dorm or, if one of us was late, they were already in the cafeteria. Luke was an earlier riser, meaning he’d drag Deacon out of bed even if the boy was half-asleep.
They weren’t here.
Of course, it sort of made sense. Deacon was probably spending time with his brother. They might even end up here. And from what I gathered, Luke was super close with Alex. The whole gang might walk in at any moment. So it made sense, but it was also just weird, because we were missing people.
And Seth?
Seth had stopped coming to breakfast the day he’d stopped training me. I was still getting used to it.
“You think everyone is in hiding?” Colin asked, scooping up his egg whites. Ew. Who just ate eggs without the yolk? The yolk was the best part. “Or was there a massive party last night and we weren’t invited?”
“And everyone is hungover now?” I smiled as I picked up a slice of bacon. “It’s possible.”
He snorted as he rested his elbow on the table. “We’re just that uncool.”
I was feeling pretty uncool and in desperate need of a pity party, but I didn’t know Colin well enough to be comfortable with me turning into a whale-sized baby in front of him. “Probably has to do with the fight yesterday. Maybe people don’t feel entirely safe right now.”
“True. I like the idea of there being a big party, though.” He chewed his eggs. “Or it could be the fact we now have two more demigods roaming around campus.”
The yummy-tasting bacon turned a little sour in my stomach.
“You guys are like mogwais fed after midnight,” he continued.
I cracked a smile at that. Though none of us were as cute as a mogwai.
Colin finished off his eggs and then moved on to his whole-wheat toast. All the butter in the world dumped on that bread wouldn’t make it taste like anything besides cardboard. “So, do you know those two? Aiden and Alex?”
Shaking my head, I put my bacon down, no longer hungry, which was a crime when it came to bacon. “No. Yesterday was the first time I’d even seen them.”
“Man, they are like legends.” He shook his head, and there was no mistaking the awe creeping into his tone. “They actually are legends among our kind.”
“Really?” I murmured, staring at my pile of bacon.
Colin munched on his toast. “I never actually formally met them, but I was here when they first came, before they left to fight Ares. The fact that they did that willingly is freaking beyond amazing. I mean, who would want to fight the God of War?”
Not me, but that was no big surprise.
“They’re pretty badass,” he went on, and I swallowed a sigh. “I might have a crush on Alex.”
I slowly lifted my gaze to his. Seriously?
He flushed. “I mean, not in that way. I’m smart enough to realize Aiden would kill me. I have a respect crush on her. She’s badass. She left to fight Ares knowing she wasn’t going to walk out of the battle.”
How fast could I haul butt out of that cafeteria?
“That took major balls.” He paused, frowning at his half-eaten toast. “Well, it took major ovaries. She had no idea that Apollo, your father, had given her ambrosia. Or at least that’s the legend and she . . .”
Colin’s praise party faded in a dull hum that matched the ache behind my eyes. I knew my irritation was unreasonable, and I also knew exactly what the source of my anger was.
Jealousy.
My skin should have been green by then. Seeing Alex yesterday had totally confirmed what I always believed about her. She was literally everything I wasn’t.
How in the world could Seth have ever been interested in me after sort of being involved with someone like her?
It wasn’t her fault. Hell, the girl didn’t even know I existed. She was batting in the major leagues and I was still trying to get into the minors. My irritation and frustration were all on me.
I was woman enough to admit that.
After breakfast, I parted ways with Colin even though he was all about us going for a run or something—and who in the hell did he think I was, that I was going to voluntarily do that? Ha. I went to the library, trolled around in there for hours with no luck, and then finally moped back to my dorm.
I stopped at my door and turned to Seth’s. Chewing on my lower lip, I willed the door to open and for Seth to step out. I don’t even know why I wanted that. He’d made things pretty clear yesterday. He’d made it clear weeks ago.
Turning around, I walked into my room, went to the bedroom, and picked up the old picture of me with my grandparents and mom. I wished I could crawl back in time and commit the moment to memory, because I didn’t remember the hours leading up to it or after it.
None of us had second chances.
Well, except Alex and Aiden. And Seth. And me, in a way. A lot of us had second chances, but we didn’t get to pick what they would be.
Based on my appearance, it was around the time of middle school. I was so freaking chubby, a total butterball, and the pattern on the paisley shirt didn’t help. But I was smiling. So was Granny. And Papa. And Mom. It had been a good day.
Placing the picture on my nightstand, I wiped the back of my hand under my eyes. My cheeks were damp, and I wasn’t sure what or who I was crying for. All I knew was that I’d been crying a lot lately, and I hated that crying made me feel weak.
What in the hell was so weak about it? Like that was the worst thing I could be doing right now. I mean, I could be engaging in self-harm or risky behaviors. I could be shit-faced or high as a kite. Nope. I w
as weepy, and I had a feeling there were people out there who probably thought going out and picking fights or drinking until they vomited was better than having a good cry.
On second thought, drinking until I didn’t know who I was sounded good right about then. I just . . . I really didn’t want to . . . feel anything. I missed my family. I missed Erin, and as much as I wanted to turn Seth’s nuts into a punching bag, I missed him—the him from before.
God, his words still stung, but I saw the truth behind what was driving them. I’d probably seen it before, but hadn’t wanted to truly acknowledge it.
Plopping onto my back, I stared up at the ceiling. Seth’s sudden change of heart sort of made sense now. He had to have known it was getting close to when Alex would return. There was no way he hadn’t. Not with the kind of bond they had. He had to have known she was coming.
I’d seen the way he’d stared at her yesterday.
And when I left the quad, Seth hadn’t followed. He stayed there with them, with her. That wasn’t jealousy talking. That was just reality.
Even though Alex and Aiden had the kind of love poets rambled on about, there had been something powerful between Seth and Alex. Deacon had said so himself, something practically unbreakable.
I always thought his reluctance to talk about Alex had to do with his guilt, but now, I knew there was more to it. Seth wasn’t over Alex and whatever they shared.
And that sucked.
Because I couldn’t compete with someone who was a legend. Someone Seth had given up eternity for.
I was in love with someone who was still wrapped up in someone else—someone who was a freaking legend among their kind.
A knock on the door drew me out of my thoughts. Sitting up, I swung my legs off the bed and stood. I hoped it was Deacon or Luke or both of them. Deacon would watch Supernatural with me and everything would be right in the world, at least for a few hours, and I wouldn’t feel like I . . . like I was forgotten.
Opening the door, I came face to face with Alex.
Holy crap.
Startled, I took a step back as I felt my mouth drop open. What was she doing here? Was she at the wrong door? Oh my God, what if she was at the wrong door and had meant to knock on Seth’s?
I was going to punch her.
Okay. She could probably kick my ass, so I would punch her and run.
She clasped her hands together as she looked up at me. “Hi,” she said. “I know we don’t know each other, but I was wondering if you had a couple of minutes to chat?”
Struck dumb, I stepped aside. Would I seriously refuse her? Uh. No. Alex walked in and closed the door behind her. I faced her, having no idea what in the hell was going on.
Standing in front of her, as close as we were, I felt like—like Bigfoot looming over her. A blonde Bigfoot. I could legit pick her up and put her in my pocket.
“I’m Alex An—”
“I know who you are.” The moment those words left my mouth, I cringed. Icicles could’ve formed in the room. “I mean, I know who you are. Everyone knows who you are.”
Her brows lifted. “That’s kind of creepy.”
I snapped my mouth shut.
“Not that you’re creepy for saying that. It’s just that I’m not used to everyone knowing who I am.” She paused, wrinkling her nose—and oh my God, my eyes widened. I did that. All. The. Time. “Well, people kind of knew who I was before the whole ‘rise from the dead’ demigod thing, but it usually wasn’t anything good.”
“Oh,” I murmured, still staring at her.
A half-smile formed on her lips. “Anyway, you’re Josie.”
I nodded slowly.
Alex laughed, the sound husky and warm. “Well, duh. You know who you are.”
I nodded again.
“This isn’t coming out right,” she said with another laugh. “I wanted to meet you. I hear there’s something we have in common.”
“We’ve both been with Seth?” I blurted out, and holy shitballs, I did not just say that.
Her brown eyes widened slightly as her mouth formed an O.
I totally just said that.
“Oh my gosh, I mean, not that you’ve been with Seth, like with him. I haven’t even actually been with him in that kind of way.” Heat scalded my cheeks. I wasn’t even sure if Seth and Alex had gone there, but I was seriously hoping that they hadn’t because that would be yet one more thing she had going for her that I didn’t.
Ugh. I couldn’t even believe my brain was spewing out these kinds of things.
“I meant that we have him in common and that’s all I was trying to say,” I finished lamely.
“Um. That’s not what I was going to say,” Alex said, blinking slowly as she reached up, tossing her hair over her shoulder. “I was going to go with us both having Apollo in common.”
“Ah. That . . . that makes more sense.” Walking around her, I dropped onto the cushions of the love seat, suddenly exhausted. The epic diarrhea of the mouth was tiring. “Apollo. Yeah, he’s, um, something else, isn’t he?”
“Yeah,” she drew the word out as she sat in the small chair. “I want to talk about Apollo, but let’s back up a second. You and Seth are . . . together?”
My face was going to melt right off. Tongue twisted, I had no idea what to say, because we weren’t together anymore, and Alex was the absolute last person I wanted to be discussing this with. But it was my fault for letting my mouth strip down and do a jig.
Alex’s lashes lowered, but the intensity of her stare could still be felt. “Okay. I know you don’t know me at all, but you’re going to learn pretty quickly that I’m super blunt, and I feel like I totally need to get this out in the open, because I didn’t know we had more in common outside of Apollo. And I’m going to probably punch someone for not filling me in on that.”
Oh geez. I squeezed my eyes shut.
“You know that Seth and I—”
“I know what you guys are,” I cut in. “I know a lot about what happened. Deacon filled me in and Seth . . . he talked a little about it.”
Her gaze sharpened. “Okay. Then did Seth explain that he and I kind of were seeing each other only for, like, a hot second?”
I shifted uncomfortably. “Well, we didn’t really get into that kind of detail.”
“I see.” She paused, glancing down at her hands. “Seth and I never got together like that.”
Something did a wholly inappropriate happy dance in my chest.
“We did fool around a couple of times,” she added, lashes lifting, and that something stopped dancing and whipped out Covenant daggers. “But Aiden was my first and he will be the only one.”
Oh. That something slowly lowered the daggers.
“Don’t get me wrong. I cared about Seth—I still do. Things are . . . weird between us. Complicated isn’t even a right enough word, and if you really know what happened, you understand that, right?”
I nodded. “I do.”
Alex held my gaze for a moment and then reached up, wrapping her hands around the middle of her hair. “Seth and I never went that far.” She started twisting her hair, and oh my God again, I did that all the time too. This was so weird. So weird. She twisted her hair into a rope. “But you two . . . ?”
“No. I mean, we were seeing each other, but not . . . not anymore.”
She eyed me closely. “Were you guys serious?”
“Yes. I mean, I thought so. I . . . uh, I really cared—” I cut myself off, looking away as I shook my head. “None of that matters.”
“I think it matters if you were actually dating Seth and he didn’t have sex with you.”
My attention swung back to her sharply.
“The Seth I knew would pretty much hump a tree if there was a hole in it,” she said, and my nose wrinkled. “And he was never serious about anyone.”
“I don’t think that really makes me feel better about not