CHAPTER IX
A YEAR LATER
"It is harder to endure, Jack, because so much my own fault, all my lifeI must feel in a measure responsible, and I cannot feel hopeful as youinsist you do, perhaps for that very reason. However, we must not talktoo much of this now, to-morrow will be time enough. You must keep allthe strength and self-control you possess for to-night."
It was more than a year later, and Jean Merritt and Jacqueline Ralstonwere in Jean's beautiful bedroom in the big house on the Rainbow ranch.Jean was sitting on a low couch with her hands clasped tightly together,while Jack was moving restlessly up and down the large, fragrant room.
"But I can't make a speech to-night, Jean, not after the bewilderingnews we have just received, although I will not believe it to be final.Why did I ever think I could? Yet surely there is a sufficient reasonnow for me to be excused!"
"Sit down for a few moments please, Jack," Jean answered with such anevidence of self-control and of unselfishness that her companionsuffered a swift emotion of shame and compunction.
"Now there isn't any question but you must go on to-night with what youintended doing. Remember we all have decided that, for the time atleast, it will be wiser to keep secret the information we have justreceived. Therefore you cannot make this your excuse for failing tospeak as you planned. If you fail to speak this evening it will appeareither that you are afraid to say what you think, or else that you havechanged your opinion."
Jack flushed.
"But I _am_ afraid. Am I not the last person in the world you would everhave dreamed attempting a public speech? And here I am involved in theeffort to make one to-night, simply because I began talking first to ourown ranchmen and then to the men on the neighboring ranches of some ofthe work I thought we ought to undertake in Wyoming. When I first beganI did not know I was making a speech. To-night I shall probably know itwithout being able to make it. Still, I don't want to talk about myselfin the face of your problem, Jean. Now let us go over the news you havereceived and see if we both understand. Ralph has been away over a year,hasn't he, working always at the mine in New Mexico and writingregularly? The mine so far has not proved a success, but Ralph insistedthat he still had faith in it and never spoke of leaving, or changinghis work. Now word arrives that two weeks ago he had a serious fall intoa pit which had been left uncovered, but that he seemed not badly hurt,only a little bruised and shaken and that he had continued with hisduties that same day as if nothing had occurred. Then next morning, ashe failed to appear, one of his men going to look for him found his tentempty. He has not been seen since. Yet no one had heard him go away inthe night and there was nothing to suggest that he had intendedremaining away, as his clothes and private papers were left behind.Naturally the people at the mine believed we had heard some word of him,and I believe we soon shall hear. Ralph will write or come to theRainbow ranch, I am convinced of it. What is it you really think, Jean?"
Jean shook her head.
"I don't know what to think. Some tragedy may have happened to Ralph, orhe may simply have grown too weary and discouraged to remain where hewas any longer."
Getting up, Jean began walking up and down the big room with itsrose-colored carpet as if her uncertainty and unhappiness must have aphysical outlet.
"I have never told you in so many words, Jack, although I must have saidenough for you to guess that Ralph and I parted without the tendernessand faith I should have shown him even if I believed he had mademistakes, because the mistakes were made chiefly for my sake. I thoughtI had learned a good deal in this year of his absence, but perhaps itwas not enough, so I must bear this new anxiety. Ralph would have beenhappier married to you, Jack, than to me; I have thought this a goodmany times. You care nothing for wealth and society; I have always caredtoo much until lately. Now after this year with all of you at the oldranch I was learning a new set of values; except for wanting Ralph Ihave been so happy here just as we used to be as children, even if wehave a new group of younger Ranch girls. Now, unless I hear from Ralphwithin the next twenty-four hours I mean to go to New Mexico to findhim. I should have been with him through this year, enduring thehardships he has been forced to endure, instead of living in comfort andidleness here at the ranch."
"But you have not lived in idleness, Jean, whatever else you may accuseyourself of. Managing this big place, keeping house for Jim and hislittle girls and for Frieda and her family is hardly being idle. Jimsays he has not been so at ease since Ruth died. It's funny Jim told mehe thought it wiser for Professor Russell to go in search of Ralphunless we receive word immediately than that he should go, although Jimand Ralph are devoted friends. Jim says that Henry is a scientist, but amore practical man of affairs than the rest of us give him credit forbeing. Yet somehow I don't believe Jim is willing to leave us alone atthe ranch, not only his own little girls, but you and Frieda and Oliveand me. He insists on driving me over to Laramie to-night, although I donot feel he likes my speaking in public. However, when I asked hisadvice he merely said: 'Go ahead, Jack, do what you wish to do; yourlife is your own. If I am an old fogy and should prefer you to stayquietly at the lodge, I never have expected it of you since you cameback and resumed your American citizenship. As long as you don't go toofar I'll stand behind you.'"
Jack smiled.
"Of course I don't know what Jim means by 'too far,' but I suppose hewill tell me in time. Now I am going away, Jean dear, and leave you totry to rest. Remember, I believe firmly that we shall hear from Ralphwithin the next few days, or the next few hours, who knows? But Oliveand Captain MacDonnell will stay with you to-night, as Frieda andProfessor Russell wish to drive over to the Woman's Club with me. Atleast if I am to make a speech I am glad it is to be made there. Friedais too funny. She is torn between being rather proud of my being asufficiently prominent person in the neighborhood for people to bewilling to listen to me, and thinking it unwomanly of me to attempt tospeak. Besides, I think she shares my present conviction that I am goingto break down and so disgrace myself and all of us. Yet it is such asimple thing I wish to talk about, and anyone ought to be able to saywhat one thinks."
As Jack rose, Jean placed her hands on her cousin's shoulders, her browneyes gazing steadfastly into Jack's gray ones.
"No, it is not going to be difficult for you to-night, Jack, not afteryou have once started with your speech. It will be difficult at first,of course, to face an audience of men and women for the first time inyour life. You have said a good many times just what you will sayto-night, but I know that you have never considered before that you_were_ making a speech. But it will be a success, Jack, because to youit is always a simple thing for people to be straightforward and honestand public-spirited. Now go and lie down yourself for an hour or so. Iam going to see what the little girls are doing."
Jack laughed.
"No, I am going off for a ride alone, Jean. It is funny, but BillyPreston, one of our cowboys, told me I should not ride alone, not evenover our own ranch. Already there seems to be a good deal of feelingagainst me because of what I have been advocating. As if I were ofenough importance to be considered dangerous! But please don't speak ofthis to any one else; I must ride alone now and then, and I havepromised Jim never to leave our ranch without an escort. It is curiousthat I can think better on horseback than at any other times. Otherpeople manage the same thing by lying down, or walking through thecountry, or in crowded city streets. I believe some writers can onlydictate when they are striding up and down their rooms. But I am offnow, really this time, Jean. I'll have a light supper at the lodge, aswe start about seven. In the morning I'll tell you the worst, orprobably Frieda will tell you before I can see you."
A moment after Jacqueline Kent was gone.
After her departure Jean suffered a stronger sensation ofdiscouragement. It was always true that Jacqueline Kent possessed avitality so keen and a sweetness of character so inherently sincere,that one was apt to be stimulated and cheered by her companionship.
Later in the same day
driving toward town, Jack remained unusuallyquiet. She was riding in the front seat of a Ford car seated beside JimColter and listening with some amusement to her sister Frieda'sconversation with her husband, which Frieda had not the slightestobjection to having overheard.
"I feel perfectly convinced that Jack is going to break down, Henry, orperhaps not even be able to begin her speech when she faces heraudience. I do wish I had not come. Of course you and Jim won't mind somuch because you are no real relation to Jack, so I shall feel much moreembarrassed than anyone else. However, my one comfort will be that ifJack does make a complete failure to-night she will never attempt tospeak in public again. I don't see why she should care so much what theother ranchmen in Wyoming do, so long as we are successful with our ownranch. But then one never has been able to count upon what Jack wouldthink or do. We are not in the least alike."
"But my dear Frieda," Professor Russell expostulated, speaking in ahushed voice intended only for Frieda's ears, "don't you think it unkindof you to suggest failure to your sister at this late hour? If you didnot wish her to speak you should have remonstrated earlier."
"Oh, I did talk to her; indeed I am sure I have discussed nothing elsefor the past week. Sometimes I have told Jack I would never forgive her,if she went on with what she had been doing, and then again I advisedher to make a perfectly wonderful speech at the Woman's Club to-night,just to show the stupid people who object to her how clever and charmingshe is, and how right. Of course I think Jack is right about a fewthings now and then."
In answer to Jack's gay laughter from the front seat and Jim Colter'schuckle, even to her husband's amused smile, Frieda continuedundisturbed.
"Frieda dear, you are a tonic and I won't dare fail if you feel as youdo about me," Jack called back over her shoulder. "You are morerefreshing than Jim, who tells me I am sure to succeed in convincing myaudience to-night, when deep down inside of him he is sure I will not.Yet you won't desert me if the worst happens, Frieda?"
Frieda shook her blonde head.
"No, Jack, I shall never turn my back upon you really, no matter whatyou do, even if I disapprove of it most dreadfully, perhaps not even ifyou should run for some public office in the state of Wyoming as if youwere a man. Of course the suggestion is absurd, but I did hear some onesay you might become an influence in the state of Wyoming."
"Yes, that was absurd, Frieda dear," Jack returned, resting her headlightly on Jim Colter's shoulder and closing her ears to Frieda's patterin order to try to think more clearly of the task ahead of her.
The subject upon which Jacqueline Kent was to speak to-night was asimple one, so simple that she had not understood why there should beany opposition to her suggestion. In the beginning it had been only asuggestion.
Jacqueline Kent desired the ranchmen of Wyoming to increase the numberof their livestock and to have larger herds of cattle, and droves ofsheep, with a view of making the state of Wyoming the most importantranch state in the country. The world was never before in so great needof food and clothing.
Yet soon her little talks with the Rainbow ranchmen and the men from theadjoining ranches became known throughout the neighborhood. Then to hersurprise Jack discovered that a large number of the prominent men inWyoming opposed her suggestion. Among these men were Senator Marshalland her former acquaintance, Peter Stevens, who was employed as anattorney to limit the supply of livestock raised in Wyoming.
To-night Jack had been asked to present her view of the question beforea group of men and women in the Woman's Club in Laramie. The buildingwas a large one. Later, when Jack stepped out upon the platform shefaced an audience of several hundred persons.
An instant the faces swam before her and her courage failed. Then sheappreciated that her first sentences could not be heard beyond the firstfew rows of chairs.