"Ingenious. Surely you couldn't have had a problem with that."
"Except that it was almost maniacal. Nicolae was so obsessed with winning that it became no fun for his team. He encouraged and cajoled, but he also badgered and belittled. These boys had no choice but to learn this stuff and win, because of the sheer force of his personality."
"A gift that could be good or bad," Marilena said.
"Certainly. His strengths are his weaknesses, as is true so many of us. Help me teach him team play, to others and their feelings. It's as if there's a discon- in his mind, as if he really believes that this world everyone in it are here for his benefit." "I'll try," Marilena managed.
"I will keep you informed," Mrs. Szabo said.
I'm sure you' will.
Ray Steele lay in his bedroom, unable to concentrate ..his homework. Nothing held his interestmnot TV I music or magazines or the Internet after the way
conversation had gone at dinner.
He had no idea how strongly his father felt about his He should have known, of course. His dad had made a secret of it. Ray just thought the old man
have to be impressed that he had gotten his pri- at eighteen and the fact that he had a con- plan. Ray knew what he was doing, what he wanted and how to achieve it.
'I've been signed up for Reserve Officer Training since late last year, and Coach Bellman says I'll have my license before I'm even out of high school me of enough other scholarships to pay my way
college."
that's fine," his father said, "but what does he know about it?"
219 218
"He knows I'm not going to get any help going to school as an athlete. Unless I want some small college." "But why? You were the bestu"
"Dad, come on. Times have changed. Even ten years ago I might have gotten a deal somewhere, but no more. You have to to be the best in your sport in the whole conference
now to get any kind of ride."
"Baseball's still your best chance."
"And it's my favorite, Dad, but it's not going to happen."
"How can you say that?"
"I can't throw ninety anymore, and I'll be surprised if I hit over .400. The last guy from our conference who got a full ride to a D-1 school hit nearly .600 with lots of bombs."
"That's not out of the realm of possibility for you." "You're a little biased, Dad, don't you think?"
"I don't know what I'm talking about? You don't think I know the game?"
"'Course you do, and you taught me everything I know. But you also taught me to be realistic about my ability. I'd have given anything to stay healthy and be able to throw hard enough to attract the scouts. But that's over, Dad. I'm going to have to pitch anyway, because too many other guys aren't playing this year. There's something about cars and girlfriends and how few people come to baseball games that makes guys want to quit unless they're superstars. If I didn't love it so much, I'd think about that too."
"So you're going to have a lousy team?"
"Likely. A lot of young guys, and nobody to draw the unless we put together some kind of a win streak.
see it."
The fireworks came when Mr. Steele tried to outline scenario for Ray's future that still included the tool
die. He talked about college and ROTC and military at least minoring in business or manufacturing, then coming back to take over the business.
Ray had hoped that by outlining his own plans--and
not including the tool and die--his father would resign himself to reality. Ray sat silent.
What do you think, Ray? Good education. hours in the planes. A little military training. Job for you. Future secure, huh?"
glanced at his mother, who forced a smile. She was a lot of things but dense wasn't one of them. She knew that dreading-this-moment look, obviously knowing her husband wasn't going to hear what he wanted.
"I'm not coming back to the tool and die, Dad." ."What, you know that already? You hate me and my so much that--"
"Comon, Dad! You know that's not true. I admire
what you've done with it, but you can't force me
If I was paying for your education I could, couldn't iBut you made sure you didn't need that."
'You told me you couldn't put me through college!
why I've tried all these different ways to get
"Yeah, but since I'm not financin' the deal, you feel
tO--"
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"I just want you to know now so you can make other arrangements. Groom someone else."
"My people are too old. And none of them has what it takes."
"So hire an heir apparent."
"You're the heir, Ray! You! It's been my dream all my life."
"But not mine, Dad. You wouldn't want me in the saddle if I didn't want it, would you? What kind of a job would I do then?"
His dad stood, face red. "I can't eat anymore." "Please, honey," his wife said.
"I just don't see how you can decide now how you're going to feel in four to six years. That's a long time. Time to get your mind right. At least keep your options open and plan a little for this possibility."
"No! Then we'll have this discussion again, Dad, and you'll have wasted all that time without finding someone
else. I'm going to be a pilot and that's that. I--"
"What if it doesn't work out?"
"Why wouldn't it? I'm made for it. I'm a pilot now. I'll start working my way up to the heavy jets, and--"
"And you'll come back to the tool and die only if all your dreams are shattered somehow."
"I wouldn't come back anyway, Dad. If for some reason I couldn't fly, I'd want to teach aviation. Or coach. Or both."
His dad left the room, throwing over his shoulder, "You do hate me."
SIXTEEN
CARPATHIA had never felt further out of her In nine years as a mother she had somehow learned, gone on instinct. But this was new
. How would she broach such a touchy subject her brilliant son? This would have to be an adult and while he had many of the worst charecteristics of an adult--and some of the best--Marilena
ever conscious that he was emotionally still a child. On the drive back from Blaj, she urged him to read she chatted softly with Viv in Hungarian. "What will we do?" she began.
Viv smiled and patted her hand. "We? Now it's we?
it's not so bad someone else has been drawn into crisis?"
' Marilena took it well. That was funny. Yes, her jealousy
seemed misplaced now. She didn't want to be alone
222 223 in this. "I know I must bear the brunt of it," she said, "but believe me, I am receptive to any advice. In my heart of hearts I long for, ahm" she struggled to find the right foreign word for her son without mentioning his namem"my progeny to use his incredibly gifted
mind for the betterment of mankind."
"He will, Marilena. He will."
Suddenly Nicky draped his arms over the back of the front seat and perched his head atop them, .putting himself between the women. Marilena felt him there and saw him in her peripheral vision. She kept her eyes on the road, peeking at him in the rearview mirror. He appeared amused.
"You should be buckled in, young man," she said, back to Romanian now.
"I am all right," he said in Hungarian, astounding her. "My prince would not let anything happen."
Marilena shuddered. He understood Hungarian, had heard their conversation. Was nothing hidden from him? Her fear turned to anger in an instant. She resolved not to lose control of this boy, wondering to her core whether she ever had any control over him. "Sit back and get your belt on!" she said. "Now!"
Marilena saw Viv ierk, apparently in surprise at her tone.
Nicky was silent, but in the mirror he showed no emotion. He wasn't surprised or cowed. Neither was he obeying.
"Don't make me pull over, young man," she said. "Do what you want," he said flatly. "You do not dare
me. And you do not want to talk to me like that
/> either."
Marilena swerved the SUV off the pavement and slid a stop. She turned in her seat to face Nicky, her face from his. "Sit down and buckle up!" she shouted. didn't move. She lifted her elbow and pressed it to his pushing with all her might.
"Marilena!" Viv screamed.
She dug in her heels and straightened her legs, all her weight into trying to drive Nicky back. he held fiercely to the back of the seat, and it was if she were pressing against granite. Seething now, released her seat belt and wrenched herself letely around until she was on her knees facing him. grabbed his shoulders and shook him, trying to drive back.
grabbed Marilena's arm and tried to pull her
Don't fight me! Help me!"
I'm not going to fight!" Viv said. "Stop!" i"Yes!" Nicky yelled. "Stop!"
I'm not driving this car until he's buckled in."
"I am protected!" Nicky said.
."I will not be hurt."
What are you saying?"
You will get hurt before I will."
)erated, Marilena turned to Viv.
just go, Marilena. We'll talk this through at
224 225
226
"You don't care that he's not buckled in?"
"I agree he's protected."
Marilena swore. "I don't know what either of you is talking about!"
"That's the problem," Viv said. "We're in communication with the spirits every day. He is protected. He's
immune to danger from which others might suffer." "I'm not driving." "Then I will," Viv said.
Nicky pointed at Marilena. "She is not sitting back here with me."
Marilena wished she had a weapon. She'd test the so-called protection of this brat.
"Get out and switch places with me," Viv said softly. Marilena left the car, trembling; the last thing she wanted was to get back in. But what was she going to do, hitchhike? She didn't want to go home either. She was without options. As she passed Viv in front of the car, the older woman said, "Breathe, Marilena. Calm yourself."
Viv slid behind the wheel, but Marilena stood with her hand on the open passenger-side door, trying to relax. Nicky had settled into the backseat again, and Viv was talking softly to him, though Marilena could not hear. Finally she got in, slammed the door, and
* buckled up. She resolved not to even look at her son
Her son. He seemed like an animal.
"Cdt, ea," Nicky whispered.
Marilena whirled in spite of herself. "What did you call me?"
"You heard me."
As Viv pulled back onto the road, Marilena again [unbuckled and turned, swinging wildly. The boy dodged and weaved, laughing. Finally she reached his wrist and yanked, but he grabbed with his other hand, forearm to his mouth, and bit fiercely, blood.
i. Marilena shrieked and pulled back.
Viv yelled, "Marilena! Stop!"
"He bit me!"
"You deserved it!" Viv said.
Marilena slid back into her seat, covering the wound
With her free hand. "What?!"
"Yes," Nicky said, "you deserved it. CSt, ea."
Marilena screamed at Nicky, calling him a name worse
Than the one he had called her.
"This has to stop!" Viv said. "Marilena, you're acting
age."
: That was the problem. He was acting older than his age
"I need an emergency room," Marilena said, blood through her fingers. "The little monster probably has rabies." She pulled her hand away and thrust her arm toward Viv. Top and bottom teeth had sunk into her flesh.
"Oh, Dumnezeu!" Viv cried and pulled into the pass-
lane, the accelerator to the floor.
Marilena glared back at Nicky and held up her bleeding
arm so he could see. "Look what you've done, copil
228
He lifted his eyes from his book and smiled. He stuck his tongue out at her, and she burst into tears. Shaken to her soul, Marilena realized she was furious enough to kill him if she had the chance.
Twenty minutes later Viv wheeled into the hospital where Nicky had been born. She told Nicky to stay in the car and rushed Marilena in. It was almost as if a doctor had been waiting for them.
"There was an accident," Viv said as he examined Marilena.
"An accident?" the doctor said. "This is a bite. A human bite. Too small for an adult. A child bit you?"
Marilena wanted to tell all, but Viv said, "I had to slam on the brakes to keep from hitting an animal, and she tried to protect my son. But he was thrown forward, causing this injury."
Her son! For once Marilena was glad not to claim him. She squinted at the doctor, trying to read whether he was buying the account.
"Perhaps I should look him over," he said.
"He's fine," Viv said. "Isn't he, Marilena?"
"Yes," she said, still trying to keep from trembling. "He's just perfect."
The wound from his upper teeth took eight stitches. q'he lower took six. Between the tetanus shot, the anesthetic, and the pain prescription, Marilena had mellowed by the time she returned to the SUV. That she found Nicky stretched out on the backseat, sleeping like a baby, renewed her fury.
"You'd better keep him away from me tonight, Viv,"
said.
* "He won't harm you," Viv said. I'll see to that." "I'm not worried about him hurting me," she said. "Actually I think I will take him for a week's vacation
" Viv said.
"Really? Where?"
"Do you care?"
"No, I guess I don't."
's head felt so heavy she had to rest it on the of the seat. That wasn't comfortable, so she lowered the seat until it angled into the backseat. She was
Viv was driving slower now, because though
Her arm was numb, the rest of her body ached. She felt vulnerable, her seat extending back to near
Nicky sat reading. At least she thought he was
She peeked left and found him staring at her. "Read," she whispered, hoping her tone would be the
First step in a healing process. She did not want to be on outs with her own son. It was his fault, she was cer- but she had overreacted, escalated things, not acted
r. But who could have? Who would put up with acting like that?
He flashed an obscene gesture, which made her sit in spite of her fatigue and pain. "Nicky!" she said. "Aunt Viv!" he called out. "She just flipped me off!" "Marilena! Honestly!"
The fight had gone out of her. She wasn't going
To defend herself against lies. Viv would take his side
anyway. Marilena turned and faced the passenger window. The scenery drifting by made her dizzy, so she shut her eyes while drowsiness overtook her. A sob rose in her throat, but she would not give in.
What had happened? What had become of her? Was it possible she had fallen so short of ever connecting with her own flesh and blood? She had wondered what could be worse than deeply loving a son with all of your being and having him act as if you didn't exist. Now she knew: having him hate you enough to cause you to question your love for him.
Marilena didn't want to hate him, and yet she had a feeling he was still looking daggers at her, scowling, prepared to call her names, give her the finger, falsely accuse. Why had she wanted a child in the first place? The gift that was to have brought her love and companionship as she grew old had become a curse that made anything good in her life pale to insignificance. What was there to live for? Her reading? Her study? Her research? They held no appeal if her own son hated
her.
She heard Viv on her cell phone; it was clear she was talking with Mrs. Szabo. "Yes, ma'am, Mrs. Carpathia and I have made some progress with Nicky already and believe you will see a changed boy when he returns to class .... We would like to get him out of that environment, take him on a vacation where we can work with him .... Thanks for understanding. If you don't hear from us, expect him back a week from today."
Marilena heard Nicky move for
ward. "Good one,
230
Tim LaHaye & ]erry B. Jenkins
Aunt Viv," he said. He still wasn't buckled in. Marilena .almost wished Viv would lose control of the SUV to see
iif he really was protected.
"Marilena, can you drive?"
"What? No, I'm--"
"It's less than ten kilometers, and I need to e-mail
"I'm out of it, Viv. Can't it wait?"
"No, now--oh, never mind. I'll just pull over."
"I really need to get home, Viv."
"Well, you can't have it both ways. You'll get home quicker by driving, because I need to do this."
just call him."
"I will, but not in the car, Marilena. Because this is private."
[:i Great. She's going to tell him what has gone on.
Viv pulled over, got out, and slammed the door.
Marilena surreptitiously lowered her window an inch, to catch the conversation. Whenever Viv glanced her way, Marilena shut her eyes, but when she had the she kept them open, trying to read the older
lady's lips.
,.At one point, Viv turned her back to the car and as she moseyed away.
said, "I love you, Nicky."
She said it again. Still no response. She turned and stretched out, hands behind his head, asleep.
She envied him. How she would love to be able to close her eyes to the world, to the mess her life had
23I
become. She only hoped she could stretch out on her bed at home and drift off. Right now she couldn't imagine it.
Marilena curled back into her least painful position, facing the side window.
Viv was striding back toward the car, talking earnestly. "Yes, yes, of course. You may tell him the deed is done I have no idea how long AI least twenty
four hours, I suspect Tonight then for dinner. We'll