SEVENTH NIGHT
THE STORY OF BIRDS OF A FEATHER
When Sa'-zada the Keeper had gathered all his comrades in front ofChita's cage for the evening of the Bird talk, Magh clambered up on herusual perch, Hathi's head, expostulating against the folly of throwingthe meeting open to such gabblers.
"Never mind," remarked Black Panther, "it's the great talkers that arethought most of here, I see. We, who have accomplished much, havingearned an honest living, but are not over ready with the tongue, amountto but little."
"Scree-he-ah-h!" cried Cockatoo. "By my crest! I am surely the oldestone here; shall I begin, O Sa'-zada?"
"Cockatoo was born in Australia," declared Sa'-zada; "at least The Booksays so, but the record of his age only goes back a matter of fortyyears."
"Just so," concurred the Cockatoo, "and from there I went to India on aship; and for downright evil words there is no Jungle to compare witha ship. Why, damn it--excuse me, friends, even the memory of my voyagecauses me to swear.
"My master, who was Captain of the ship, gave me to one of theWomen-kind in Calcutta--'Mem-Sahib' the others called her. There I hadjust the loveliest life any poor exiled Cockatoo could wish for; itmakes me swear--weep, I mean--when I think of the sweet Eatings she hadfor me. Not but that Sa'-zada is kind, only no one but a Woman knowshow to look after a Cockatoo. At tiffin I was always allowed to come onthe table, and the Mem-Sahib would take the cream from the top of themilk and give it to me. The Sahib threw pieces of bread at my head,which is like a Man's way, having no regard for the dignity of aCockatoo.
"One day, being frightened because of something, I fluttered to the topof his head, which was all bare of feathers, and verily I believe theMan-fear, of which Hathi has spoken, came to my new master. I couldalmost fancy I was back on the ship, for his language was much likethat of the fo'castle.
"Potai was the sweeper, a low-caste Hindoo of an evil presence; andsave for the fact that he wore no foot-covering I should have been in abad way. When the Mem-Sahib was not looking he beat me with his broom,simply because, that often being lonesome, I'd call aloud, 'Potai!Potai!' just to see him come running from the stables.
"Thinking to break him of his evil habit of beating me, many times Ihid behind the _purda_ of a door waiting for the coming of his uglytoes. Swisp! swisp! I'd hear the broom; 'Uh-h, uh-h!' old Potai wouldgrunt, because of the stooping, and presently under the _purda_, whichhung straight down, would peep his low-caste toes.
"Click! just like that I'd nip quick, and run for the Mem-Sahib,screaming that Potai was beating me. I'm sure it was not an evil act onmy part, for if any Sahib saw it he would laugh, and give me nuts orsomething sweet. That was because everyone knew that Potai was evil andof a low caste.
"Many a time I saved the tiffin from the thieving crows----"
"Caw-w-w, what-a yar-r-r-n!" growled Kauwa the Crow. "We who are thecleaners of cities are not thieves. What is a Cockatoo? A teller offalse tales and a breaker of rest."
"Ca-lack! even what Cockatoo has said of Kauwa is true," declared theAdjutant, solemnly, snapping his sword in its scabbard; "I, who am_the_ cleaner of cities, consider Kauwa but a thief. Once many of theSeven Sisters, for that is the evil name of Kauwa's tribe, stole afull-flavored fish from my very teeth----"
"Aw, aw, aw! let me tell it, let me tell it," cried Kauwa; "let me tellthe true tale of my solemn friend's stealing."
"Now we shall get at the real history of the Feathered Kind," chuckledPardus. "When the Jungle Dwellers fall out amongst themselves and makemuch clatter, there is always the chance of an easy Kill."
"Caw-aw-aw! It was this way," fairly snapped Crow. "A seller of smallthings, a _box wallah_, walking in an honest way fast after the _palki_of a great Sahib, even on the Red Road of Calcutta, by chance wasstruck by another _palki_ and his box of many things thrown to theground. Then this honest one of the straight face, Adjutant, seeing themishap from his perch on the lion which is over the Viceroy's gate,swooped down like a proper Dacoit and swallowed some brown Eating whichwas like squares of butter, and made haste back to his perch. Even aCrow would have known better than that, for it was soap. And all daymany of the Men-kind stood and looked at our baldheaded friend, for agreat sickness came to him; and as he coughed, soap-bubbles floatedupward. The Hindoos said it was a work of their gods."
"Just what I thought," grunted Pardus; "all clatter, and no true storyof anything."
"Well," sighed Cockatoo wearily, "my Mem-Sahib always put me in alittle house on the veranda at night. Though I didn't like it at all,still it was _my_ house, and one day, in the midst of a rain, when Isought to enter, inside were two of the Cat young."
"AND AS HE COUGHED, SOAP BUBBLES FLOATED UPWARD."]
"Kittens?" queried Sa'-zada.
"Ee-he-ah; and just behind me the old Cat with another in her mouth.Hard nuts! but such a row you never heard in your life. When I tried todrag the Kittens out, the Cat dug her beak----"
"Claws, you mean," corrected Sa'-zada.
"Ee-he-ah--claws in my back; but the Mem-Sahib took them away."
"Ugh, ugh! all lies! Bird talk!" grunted Boar. "What say you,Sa'-zada?"
"It is true," declared the Keeper, much to the disgust of hisquestioner; "for in The Book are also other true tales of Cockatoo. TheMem-Sahib has written that he was a great mischief-maker. She says thaton the back veranda of her bungalow was a filter, and when 'Cocky'wanted a bath, he used to turn the tap, but never knew enough to shutit off, so the filter was always running dry.
"Also, there was a guava tree in the compound, and our friend ate allthe guavas just as they ripened, so no one but Cocky got any of thefruit. That he was always fighting with Jock, her Scotch Terrier, andthe clamor fair made her head ache."
"Whatever Sa'-zada reads from The Book is most certainly true,"commented Magh.
"I've been thinking," began the Adjutant, solemnly----
"You look like it," growled Wolf.
"Of a story about Kauwa," continued the Adjutant----
"He stole three silver spoons from my Mem-Sahib," interrupted Cockyhastily, suddenly remembering the incident, "and hid them in theDog-cart, where they were found next day; which shows that he isneither wise nor honest."
"Mine is a true tale," declared Adjutant, with great dignity. "Onemorning, looking calmly over the great city to see that all had beentidied up, I saw my little black friend, whose voice is like unto thesqueak of a Bullock-cart, crouched in an open window, with wings wellspread ready for flight.
"'A new piece of thieving,' thought I, and, drawing closer, I saw Kauwahop to the floor, pass over to a bed on which slept a Sahib, and gentlytake a slice of toast from the top of a cup; then away went the thief.
"But the full wickedness was later, for when the Sahib awoke he spoketo his servant in the manner which Cockatoo has related of the ship.And when the other, who was of the Black Kind, declared he had put thetoast beside his Master, the Sahib beat him for a liar. Even threemornings did Kauwa take the toast; but on the fourth the Sahib, who waspretending to sleep, nearly broke his back with the cast of a boot."
"Jungle Dwellers are Jungle Dwellers, and City Dwellers are CityDwellers," commenced Hornbill, gravely, "and I'm so glad I'm a JungleDweller. These tales show what city life is like. Save for anoccasional row with Magh's friends, Hanuman and the rest, whosestomachs are out of all proportion to the quantity of fruit to be had,I have led a very peaceful life in the Jungle."
"LEAVING JUST A PLACE FOR HER SHARP BEAK."]
"Tell me," queried Magh, maliciously, "do your Young roost on yournose?"
"No; that is to keep inquisitive folks at a distance. And, talking ofYoung, when my wife has laid her two big eggs in a hole in some tree, Ishut her up there with the eggs--make her stay home to mind the houseand the oncoming family. I plaster up the hole with mud, leaving just aplace for her sharp beak; this to keep the Monkeys from stealing herand the eggs."
"Kaw-aw-aw! Talking of nests," said Kauwa, "when I was in Calcutta I
designed a nest that would last forever--yes, forever. Each year beforethat time, because of the monsoon winds, my nest had always beendestroyed; but the time I speak of, having a job on hand----"
"On beak, you mean!" laughed Sa'-zada.
"Aw-haw!--to clean up about a cook-house behind a certain place of theSahib's in which they bottled water of a fierce strength--as I say,being busy in this same compound, I spied many, many twigs of wire."
"What's wire?" asked Mooswa; "I've never, that I know of, eaten suchtwigs."
Sa'-zada explained, "Kauwa means bottled soda water, I fancy, and thewire from the corks."
"A thought came to me," continued Kauwa, "to build my nest of thesebright little things, and I did, first getting my mate's opinion on thematter, of course. Dead Pigs! but it _was_ a nest! We would swing, andjump, and hang to it by our beaks, and never a break in the wall. But Ihad forgotten all about the selfish desire of the Men--but that wasafter. The first trouble was when Cuckoo--a proper _budmash_ bird sheis--came and laid two eggs in the nest. I saw the difference in theeggs at once, but my mate declared that they were all her own laying.She took rather a pride in her ability to lay eggs--to tell you thetruth, we quarreled over it."
"I believe that," yawned Adjutant.
"However, she had her way, and started to hatch out these foreigndevils; but the Men, as I have said, seeing my beautiful nest, sent aMan of low caste up the tree, and he took it away, Cuckoo eggs and all.It was a good joke on the Cuckoo Bird, and I was so mad at the wayeverything turned out, Caw-ha! I never made it again."
"I can swallow a plantain at one gulp," said Hornbill proudly.
"Why do you toss it up first?" asked Sa'-zada, alluding to the peculiarhabit the Hornbill has of throwing everything into the air, andcatching it as he swallows it.
"It's all in the way of slow eating," answered Hornbill.
"Now," said Myna, "it is surely my turn. I, Myna, who was the pride ofthe Calcutta Zoo in the matter of speech, have sat here like a Tucktoonot saying a word, and listening to such as Cockatoo boasting about thefew paltry oaths he picked up from the Sailor-kind. Why, damn youreyes, sir----"
And before Sa'-zada could still the tumult, Cockatoo and Myna, the besttalking Bird of all India, were hurling the most unparliamentarylanguage at each other that had ever been bandied about a Birdgathering.
When Sa'-zada had stopped the indelicate scolding of the two Birds Mynaproceeded to tell of his life.
"I was born in the Burma hills, amongst the Shans. That's where I gotmy beautiful blue-black coat and lovely yellow beak."
"Modest Bird," sneered Magh.
"It was Mah Thin who snared me; but she was good to me, though--riceand fruit, all I could eat; and she never once forgot to put theturmeric and ground chillies in my rice; for, you know, if I did notget something hot in my food I'd soon die. I was somewhat like Cockatooin that a Ship-man bought me and took me to Calcutta. He made me a mostwise bird, and taught me many clever sayings. And when he was inCalcutta with his ship I would be put in the Zoo, so that the Sahibsfrom all parts might hear my speech.
"One day Tom--that was my master's name; he taught me to call himTom--said to me, 'To-morrow the _Lat_ Sahib, the Sirdar, and manyladies are coming to hear you talk; Myna.' Then he made me repeat overand over again, 'Good-morning, your Excellency.'"
"It was a hard word he gave you," commented Magh.
"It was indeed. Let claw-nosed Cockatoo try it; he thinks he cantalk--let him try that."
"Avast there, you lubber----" commenced Cocky, but Sa'-zada stoppedhim.
"Well, I said it over and over, and over again, and Tom was so pleasedhe gave me a graft mango to eat. Next day the Viceroy and manyMem-Sahibs and Sahibs gathered about my cage, and the Viceroy said,'Good-morning, Polly.' Now this made me mad--to be called Polly, asthough I had a hooked nose like Cockatoo; and in my anger I gotexcited, and, for-the-love-of-hot-spiced-rice, I couldn't think of whatTom had told me to say.
"'Speak up!' said Tom.
"In my anger, and forgetting the other thing, and seeing so manystrange faces against the very bars of my cage, I blurted out, 'I'llsee you damned first!' just as the sailors used to teach me."
"Caw-haw-haw-haw! Very funny, indeed. Next to a fat bone, or the hidingof a silver spoon, I like a joke myself," commented Kauwa. "Once at thefirst edge of the Hot Time I went to Simla. That was also at the timeof the going of the Sahibs, but after Calcutta it was dull--fairstupid.
"One morning, as I was feeling most lonesome, I spied a long row ofqueer little Donkeys standing with their tails to a fence. They hadbrought loads of brick. I flew to the fence, and reaching far down,pulled the tail of my first Donkey. Much food! but he did kick--it mademe laugh. I pulled the tail of every Donkey of the line, and when I hadfinished there wasn't a board left on the fence. Then the Man who wasmaster of the fence, and the one that was master of the Donkeys, foughtover this matter, and pulled each about by the feathers that were ontheir heads. It was the only real pleasant day I had in Simla."
"Did-you-do-it!" screamed the Redwattled Lapwing, suddenly roused toanimation by falling off Mooswa's back, where he had been trying tobalance himself with his poor front-toed feet.
"Caw-w-w! I did; and for three grains of corn I'd pull your tail, too."
"I wasn't speaking to you," retorted Titiri the Lapwing; "I wasdreaming of my old home in India--dreaming that the hunters had comeinto the rice fields to shoot the poor Paddy Birds and Bakula (Egret)for their feathers."
"Murderers, you should call them, not Hunters," exclaimed Hathi. "Itmakes me sniff in my nose now when I think of the Birds I've seenmurdered, just for their feathers."
"It's an outrageous shame," declared Sa'-zada.
"I did all I could," asserted Lapwing. "When I saw the Gun-men coming,sneaking along, crouched like Pardus----"
"Sneaking like Pardus--go on, Good Bird!" chimed in Magh.
"I flew just ahead of them, and cried 'Tee-he-he! Here come theMurderers!' so that every bird in all the _jhils_ about could hear me.And when Bakula, and Kowar the Ibis, and all the others had flown tosafety, I shouted, 'Did-you-do-it, did-you-do-it!' Then the Men usedlanguage much like the disgraceful talk we have had from Cocky and Mynato-night."
"You carried a heavy responsibility," remarked Sa'-zada.
"All lies," sneered Kauwa. "Fat Bones! why, he can't even sit on thelimb of a tree."
"That is because of my feet," sighed Lapwing. "I have no toes behind."
"Where do you sleep?" asked Magh.
"On the ground," answered Lapwing.
"That's so," declared Sa'-zada, "for the Natives of the East say thatTitiri sleeps on his back, and holds up the sky with his feet."
"But why should the Men kill Birds for a few feathers?" croakedVulture. "I don't believe it. Nobody asked me for one of mine. In factthe great trouble of all eating is the feathers or skin."
"Whe-eh-eh!" exclaimed Ostrich, disgustedly. "Pheu! your feathers!Even your head looks like a boiled Lobster. They do not kill me--theMen--but I know they are crazy for feathers, for they pull mine allout. Some day I'll give one of them a kick that will cure him of hisfeather fancy. I did rake one from beak to feet once with my strong toenail. When I bring a foot up over my head and down like this----"
As Ostrich swung his leg every one skurried out of the way, for theyknew it was like a sword descending.
"Yes," cried Magh, "if you only had a brain the size of thattoe-nail----"
"Stop it!" cried Sa'-zada, for this was an unpleasant truth; Ostrich,though such a huge fellow himself, has a brain about the size of aHumming Bird's.
"Talking of Wives," said Ostrich, with the most extraordinaryirrelevance, "mine died when I was twenty-seven years old; and, ofcourse, as it is the way with us Birds, I never took up with another,though I've seen the most beautifully feathered ones of our Kind--quiteenough to make one's mouth water.
"She had queer ways, to be sure--my wife. As you all know, our way ofhatching eggs is turn about, the M
other Birds sitting all day, while weLords of the Nest sit at night. But my wife would take notionssometimes and not sit at all. In that case I always sat night and dayuntil the job was finished. By-a-sore-breast-bone! but making a nestin the hard-graveled desert is a job to be avoided."
"Sore knuckles!" exclaimed Magh, "where are we at? We were talking offeathers."
"So we were, so we were," decided Mooswa. "And what I want to know is,do the Men eat the feathers they hunt for?"
"Oh, Jungle Dwellers!" exclaimed Magh; "if you were to sit in my cagefor half a day you would see what they do with them. The Women comethere with their heads covered with all kinds of feathers, red, andgreen, and blue--Silly! how would I look with my head stuck full offunny old feathers?"
"Like the Devil!" exclaimed Sa'-zada.
"Like a Woman," retorted Magh. "And their hair is so pretty, too. I'veseen red hair just like mine, and then to cover it up with a crest offeathers like Cockatoo wears; I'd be ashamed of the thing."
"It's a sin to murder the Birds," whimpered Mooswa; "that's the worstpart of it."
"Tonk, tonk, tonk!" came a noise just like a small Boy striking an irontelegraph post with a stick. It was the small Coppersmith Bird clearinghis throat. Very funny the green pudgy little chap looked with his bigblack mustaches.
"The Men are great thieves," he asserted. "When I was a chick my Mothertaught me to stick my tail under my wings for fear they would stealthe feathers as I slept."
"Steal tail feathers!" screamed Eagle; "I should say they would. Out inthe West, where was my home, when a Man becomes a great Chief he sticksthree of my tail feathers in his hair; and when the Head Chief of agreat Indian tribe rises up to make a big talk, what does he hold inhis hand? The things that are bright like water-drops----"
"Diamond rings," exclaimed Sa'-zada, interrupting.
"No; he holds one of my wings to show that he is great."
"Yes, you are the King Bird, Eagle," concurred Sa'-zada, "the emblem ofour country."
"I can break a lamb's back with my talons," assented Eagle, ignoringthe sublime disdainfully, "but I wouldn't trust my nest within reach ofany Man--they're a lot of thieves."
"Nice feathers are a great trouble," asserted Sparrow; "I'm glad Ihaven't any."
"What difference does it make?" cried Quail; "the Men kill me, and I'msure I'm not gaudy."
"You're good eating, though," chuckled Gidar the Jackal. "After a day'sshoot of the Men-kind, the scent from their cook-house is fairmaddening. Oh-h-h, ki-yi! I've had many a Quail bone in my time."
"Even Lapwing can't save _us_ from the Hunters," lamented Quail; "theyplay us such vile tricks. I've seen a rice field with a dozen bamboosstuck in it, and on top of each bamboo a cage with a tame Cock Quail;and in the center, hidden away, sat a man with a little drum which hetapped with his fingers. And the drum would whistle 'peep, peep, peep,'and the Birds in the cages would go 'peep, peep, peep,' and we CockBirds of the Jungle, thinking it a challenge to battle, would answerback, 'peep, peep, peep,' and go seeking out these strange Birds whowere calling for fight. Of course, our Wives would go with us to seethe battle, and in the end all would be snared or shot by the deceitfulMen."
"That's almost worse than being taken for one's feathers," said Egret."I'm glad they don't eat me."
"No Mussulman would eat you, Buff Egret," said Gidar the Jackal. "It'sbecause of your habit of picking ticks off the Pigs."
"Some Birds do have vile habits," declared Crow. "Paddy Bird has aBrother in Burma who gets drunk on the Men's toddy."
"I doubt if that be true," said Sa'-zada, "though he is really called'Bacchus' in the science books."
Said Myna, "Of all Birds, I think the Jungle Fowl are the worst. TheCocks do nothing but fight, fight, all the time--fight, and then get upin a tree and crow about it, as though it were to their credit."
Said Kauwa the Crow, "When one of our family becomes quarrelsome, or agreat nuisance, we hold a meeting--I have seen even a thousand Crows atsuch meetings--hear all there is to say about him, and then if itappears that he is utterly bad we beat him to death."
"Tub-full-of-bread!" exclaimed Hathi, sleepily, "it's my opinion thatall Birds should be on their roosts--it's very late."
"And roost high, too," said Magh, "for Coyote and Gidar have beenlicking their chops for the last hour. I've watched them. And lockPython up, O Sa'-zada, for high roosts won't save them from him."
"All to bed, all to bed!" cried the Keeper. "To-morrow night we'll havesome more tales."
The last cry heard on the sleepy night air after all were safely intheir cages was Cockatoo's "Avast there, you lubber!" as Myna, stickinghis saucy yellow beak through the bars of his cage, called across tohim, "Want a glass of grog, Polly?"
Eighth Night
The Stories of Buffalo and Bison