The ones ez is still alive, anyway,’ Caalador added. ‘A feller what turns down the chance t’ join some friends in the treason business ain’t got too much in the way o’ life-expectancy after he sez no.’
‘May I speak, your Majesty?’ Alean asked Ehlana timidly.
‘Of course, dear.’
The gentle girl was holding one of the files in her hands. ‘Does ink always fade and paper turn yellow as the document gets older?’ she asked them in a barely audible voice.
‘Indeed it does, child,’ Sarabian laughed. ‘It drives librarians crazy.’
‘And if there was something written down in one of these packages of paper that the people at the Inferior Ministry didn’t want us to…’
Oscagne suddenly howled with laughter.
Alean blushed and lowered her head. ‘I’m just being silly,’ she said in a very tiny voice. ‘I’m sorry I interrupted.’
‘The place is called the Interior Ministry, Alean,’ Melidere told her gently.
‘I preferred her term,’ Oscagne chuckled.
‘May I be excused, my Queen?’ Alean asked, her face flaming with mortification.
‘Of course, dear,’ Ehlana replied sympathetically.
‘Not just yet, Ehlana,’ Sarabian cut in. ‘Come here, child,’ he said to Alean.
She crossed to his chair and curtsied a bit awkwardly. ‘Yes, your Majesty?’ she said in a scarcely audible voice.
‘Don’t pay any attention to Oscagne,’ he said. ‘His sense of humor gets the best of him sometimes. What were you going to say?’
‘It’s silly, your Majesty. I’m just an ignorant girl. I shouldn’t have spoken.’
‘Alean,’ he said very gently, ‘you were the one who suggested that we take all the files of all the ministries out of the government buildings and spread them out on the lawns. That turned out to be an excellent idea. I don’t know about these others, but I’ll listen to anything you have to say. Please go on.’
‘Well, your Majesty,’ she said, blushing even harder, ‘as I understand what Milord Stragen just said, those people wanted to hide things that were written down, so they wrote new papers and put them in place of the ones they didn’t want us to see.’
‘It looks as if that’s what they’ve done, all right.’
‘Well, then, if new paper’s white, and old paper’s yellow, wouldn’t that sort of mean that anybody whose package has white papers mixed in with yellow ones has something to hide?’
‘Oh, good God!’ Stragen exclaimed, smacking himself on the forehead with his open palm. ‘How could I have been so stupid?’
‘And I went right along with you,’ Caalador added. ‘We both walked right over the top of the simplest and most obvious answer. How could we have missed it?’
‘If I wanted to be spiteful, I could say that it was because you’re men, Master Caalador,’ Baroness Melidere smiled sweetly, ‘and men just adore unnecessary complications. It’s not nice to be spiteful, though, so I won’t say it.’ She gave the two thieves an arch little look. ‘I may think it, but I won’t say it,’ she added.
‘It’s very easily explained, your Majesty,’ Teovin replied calmly. ‘You’ve already touched on it yourself.’ Teovin, the Director of the Secret Police at the Interior Ministry, was a dry, spare sort of man with no really distinguishing features. He was so ordinary-looking that Ehlana felt him to be an almost perfect secret policeman.
‘And what is this brilliant explanation that I’ve already discovered without even noticing it?’ Sarabian asked acidly.
Teovin held up the yellowed sheet the Emperor had just given him. ‘As your Majesty pointed out, the ink on this document has faded rather badly. The information in our files is vital to the security of the Empire, so we can’t let time erase the documents. The files are constantly reviewed, and any document that shows signs of approaching illegibility is copied off to preserve it.’
‘Why hasn’t that one in your hand been updated then, Teovin?’ the Emperor asked. ‘It’s barely legible.’
Teovin coughed diffidently. ‘Ah – budgetary considerations, your Majesty,’ he explained. ‘The Chancellery of the Exchequer saw fit to cut our appropriation this year. They’re strange over at Exchequer. They always act as if it were their own personal money.’
‘They do rather, don’t they?’ Sarabian laughed. The Emperor, Ehlana noted, was very fast on his feet, instantly adjusting to surprises. ‘Chancellor Gashon’s hands start to shake every time I start talking about replacing broken tiles in the throne-room. I’m glad we had the chance to straighten this out, my friend. I commend you for your devotion to your duty and your concern for the documents which have been placed in your care.’
‘I live but to serve, your Majesty.’ Teovin paused. ‘I wonder – might I have a word with Interior Minister Kolata? There are some matters – strictly routine, of course – that should be brought to his attention.’
Sarabian laughed. ‘Afraid not, old boy,’ he said easily. ‘You wouldn’t be able to keep his attention for very long today.’
‘Oh?’
‘He got some tainted fish at supper last night, and he’s been vomiting into a pail since just after midnight. We keep checking the pail, but his toenails haven’t come out as yet. Poor Kolata. I can’t remember when I’ve seen a man so sick.’
‘Do you think it’s serious, your Majesty?’ Teovin sounded genuinely concerned.
‘Oh, probably not. We’ve all come in contact with bad food before, so we know what to expect. He thinks he’s going to die, though. I’d imagine that he rather wishes he could. We have a physician in attendance. He’ll be all right tomorrow – thinner, maybe, and a little shaky, but recovered enough to look after business. Why don’t you come by in the morning? I’ll make sure that you get in to see him.’
‘As your Majesty commands,’ Teovin said, dropping to the floor to grovel formally before the Emperor. Then he rose to his feet and left the audience chamber.
They waited.
‘He’s gone,’ Mirtai reported from the doorway. ‘He just went out into the courtyard.’
‘Quick, isn’t he?’ Caalador noted. ‘He didn’t so much as turn a hair when your Majesty handed him that document.’
‘He was ready for us,’ Stragen said. ‘He had his story prepared well in advance.’
‘His explanation is plausible, Stragen,’ Sarabian pointed out.
‘Of course, your Majesty. Secret policemen are very creative. We know that Interior Minister Kolata’s involved in treason. He wouldn’t be much of a threat all by himself, so his entire agency’s suspect. We almost have to assume that every department head is involved. As Caalador so colorfully pointed out, anyone who didn’t join in probably got himself defenestrated just as soon as he objected.’
‘De-what?’ Melidere asked.
‘Defenestrated. It means getting thrown out of a window – a high one, usually. It doesn’t accomplish very much to push somebody out of a ground-floor window.’
‘There isn’t really such a word, Stragen. You’re making it up.’
‘No, honestly, Baroness,’ he protested. ‘It’s a real word. It’s a common solution to the problem of politically inconvenient people.’
‘I think we’re straying here,’ Ehlana told them. ‘Sarabian, why did you make up that story about Kolata and the bad fish?’
‘We don’t want his underlings to find out that we’re keeping him drugged into insensibility most of the time, do we, Ehlana?’
‘No, I suppose not. Are you really going to let Teovin in to see him tomorrow?’
‘Maybe we should. We’ve been stalling Kolata’s underlings for three days now, and I’m starting to run out of excuses. We’d better let one of them see him, or they’ll start to get suspicious.’
‘I’m not sure it’s a good idea, but maybe you’re right. Alean, do be a dear and run down to the kitchen. Tell the cooks not to drug Minister Kolata’s supper tonight.’
‘Yes, your Majesty,’ t
he girl replied.
‘You might want to tell them to give him an emetic instead,’ Stragen suggested.
‘Why would we want to do that?’ Melidere asked.
‘Emperor Sarabian just told the excellent Teovin that Kolata’s been throwing up all day. We wouldn’t want people to start accusing his Majesty of lying through his teeth, would we? Minister Kolata should show some signs of illness when Teovin visits him tomorrow. A good strong emetic should take care of that.’
Alean giggled wickedly.
The Royal Princess Danae sat on a divan. She was carefully dressing Mmrr in a new doll’s gown. Over the centuries, Aphrael had noticed that little Elene girls did that quite frequently. It didn’t really make any sense to the Child Goddess, but since it was a long-established custom – ‘Oh, quit,’ she murmured to her struggling cat. ‘I’m not hurting you.’
Mmrr objected loudly, giving vent to a plaintive yowl filled to the brim with a heart-rending self-pity.
‘Teovin was right about one thing,’ Stragen was saying to the rest of them. They had all gathered in the royal apartments again, and the Thalesian thief was holding forth once more. Danae liked Stragen, but the fact that he absolutely adored the sound of his own voice made him a bit tedious at times. ‘The Ministry of the Interior would die en masse before they’d destroy a single scrap of paper. The documents they pulled out of those files are somewhere in the building, and those documents would tell us things we haven’t even guessed as yet about the conspiracy. I’d give my teeth to get a look at them.’
‘And spoil your smile, Stragen?’ Melidere objected. ‘Bite your tongue.’
‘I was speaking figuratively, of course.’
‘He’s probably right, your Majesties,’ Caalador agreed, forgoing the dialect. ‘Those original documents would be an absolute gold-mine. I don’t know that I’d give my teeth, but I would give a lot to browse through them.’
Danae rolled her eyes. ‘Elenes,’ she said under her breath. ‘If it’s all that important to you, Caalador,’ she said, ‘go look at them.’
‘We don’t know whur it iz they got ‘em hid, little dorlin’.’
‘Look for them, Caalador,’ she said with exaggerated patience. ‘You’ve got all night every night for the next month or two, haven’t you? Talen told me once that he can get into any house in the world in under a quarter of an hour. You two are more experienced at it, so it probably wouldn’t take you nearly as long. You’re not going to steal the papers, all you’re going to do is read them. If you’re just a little careful to put them back where you found them after you’re finished, nobody will even know that you’ve seen them.’
Caalador and Stragen looked at each other sheepishly. ‘Why didn’t we think of that?’ Stragen asked his friend.
‘It seems to me I’ve already told you why once,’ Melidere said. ‘Shall we go through it again? It’s really a very good idea, Princess. These two might not be much good at thinking sometimes, but they’re probably very good burglars. They both have that shifty, unreliable look about them.’
‘They do just a bit, don’t they?’ Danae agreed. She set Mmrr down on the floor. ‘There,’ she said, ‘isn’t she adorable?’
The angry lashing of Mmrr’s tail, however, totally spoiled the effect.
‘The tail definitely detracts from the fashion statement, Danae,’ Sarabian laughed indulgently.
‘Oh, I can fix that right up, Sarabian,’ she assured him. ‘I’ll tell you what, Mmrr. How would you like to have me tie a big pink velvet bow right on the end of your tail to sort of set things off? You could wave it around like a parasol if you wanted.’
Mmrr’s tail stopped in mid-swish.
‘I thought you might see it that way,’ Danae said.
‘Shall we go down to the dungeon for your fencing lesson, your Majesty?’ Stragen suggested. ‘Caalador and I are going to be busy being burglars tonight, I think.’
‘Not only tonight, I’m afraid,’ Caalador added. ‘I haven’t been on a roof in years.’
‘It’s like swimming, Caalador,’ Stragen said. ‘Once you learn how, you never forget.’
‘I’d really like to forgo the lesson today, Milord Stragen,’ Sarabian said. ‘I’m still sore from yesterday.’
‘Fencing is not like swimming, your Majesty,’ Stragen told him. ‘You have to practice continually. If you’re going to wear that rapier, you’d better know how to use it. In a tight situation, that could be your last line of defense.’
Sarabian sighed. ‘Sometimes I wish I’d never even heard of Elenes,’ he mourned.
‘Because Ehlana told me to,’ Mirtai said as she, Engessa, Kring and the two thieves crossed the document-littered lawn toward the Interior Ministry. ‘She wants to be sure that nobody interrupts you.’
‘Mirtai,’ Stragen said with a pained look, ‘I love you like a sister, but burglary’s a fine art.’
‘I think my beloved can manage, friend Stragen,’ Kring said. ‘I’ve seen her walk through a pile of dry leaves and not make a sound.’
‘I just don’t like it,’ Stragen complained.
‘You are not required to, Stragen-thief,’ Engessa told him. ‘Ehlana-queen said that Mirtai-daughter will go with you, so she will go.’
Mirtai smiled up at the towering Atan. ‘Thank you, Engessa-father. It’s so hard to make Elenes grasp reality sometimes.’
‘Engessa and I are going to relieve the two knights watching over the documents on the lawn,’ Kring told them. ‘We’ll stay fairly close to the building, and we have other men nearby. Call if anyone surprises you in there, and we’ll come in and rescue you.’
‘I’ve never had a platoon of soldiers standing watch for me while I burglarized a building before,’ Caalador noted. ‘It adds a whole new dimension to the business.’
Stragen grunted sourly. ‘It takes a lot of the fun out of it. A large part of the thrill of burglary comes from the danger of getting caught.’
‘I’ve never tried burglary,’ Kring admitted. ‘It’s not much of a challenge among the Peloi, since we all live in tents. A sharp knife will get you into the stoutest tent in the world. If we want to ransack someone’s encampment, we usually send in some men to run off his horses. He chases those men, and that gives us a free hand.’
‘Burglary’s a crime of stealth, Kring,’ Stragen smiled. ‘You get to sneak around at night and climb over rooftops. It’s a lot of fun – and really quite profitable.’
‘Be careful up there on that roof, Mirtai,’ Kring admonished his betrothed. ‘I went to a great deal of trouble winning you, and I’d hate to lose you at this point. Oh, speaking of that, friend Stragen – and you too, friend Caalador – if anything happens to her, you do know that I’ll kill you, don’t you?’
‘We wouldn’t have it any other way, friend Kring,’ Stragen smiled.
Mirtai ran a caressing hand over her beloved’s scalp. Stragen had noticed that she did that quite often. He wondered if the feel of the little fellow’s shaved head might have had some bearing on her decision to marry him. ‘You need a shave,’ the giantess said. ‘Remind me in the morning, and I’ll take care of it.’
Then Stragen, Caalador and Mirtai, all dressed in close-fitting black clothing, slipped through the shadows of a grove of trees near the Ministry of the Interior. ‘You’re really fond of the little fellow, aren’t you, Mirtai?’ Stragen murmured softly, ducking under a tree-limb.
‘Kring? He’s a suitable sort of man.’
‘That’s a rather lukewarm declaration of passion.’
‘Passion’s a private thing. It shouldn’t be displayed in public.’
‘Then you do have those feelings for him?’
‘I don’t really see where that’s any of your business, Stragen.’
There was a filmy layer of fog lying on the lawns of the imperial compound. It was autumn now, and the fog crept in off the Tamul Sea every evening. The moon would not rise for hours yet, and all in all it was a perfect night for a burglary.
/> Caalador was puffing when they reached the wall surrounding the Ministry of the Interior. ‘Out of condition,’ he muttered.
‘You’re almost as bad as Platime,’ Stragen told him, speaking very softly. Then he squinted upward, swinging a heavy grappling hook in his hand. He stepped back and began to whirl the hook in a wide circle, letting out more rope with each circuit. Then he hurled it upward with the rope trailing behind it. It sailed up over the wall and fell inside, striking the stones with a metallic-sounding clink. He tugged down a couple of times to set the points in place. Then he sat down on the grass.
‘Aren’t we going up?’ Mirtai asked him.
‘Not yet. Somebody might have heard it. We’ll wait until his curiosity’s had time to wear off.’
‘Fellers what’s a-standin’ watch in the middle o’ the night ain’t really all that eager t’ go lookin’ fer where it is ez noises is a-comin’ from, dorlin’,’ Caalador explained. ‘It’s been my experience that they usually feel that a quiet watch is a good watch, so they don’t go out of their way to investigate things. As long as nobody sets the building on fire, they’re not overburdened with curiosity. B’sides,’ he added, dipping once again into the dialect, ‘fellers ez gits chose t’ stand gord at night usual turns out t’ be drankin’ min, an’ after a flagon er two, they can’t really hear hordly nuthin’ a-tall.’ He looked at Stragen. ‘Do you want to try the ground floor before we go up on the roof?’ he asked in clipped Elenic.
‘No,’ Stragen decided. ‘Ground-floor windows are always double-checked when people lock up, and watchmen pass the lonely hours of the night rattling door handles and trying the windows close to the ground. I’ve always preferred attics myself.’
‘What if all the attic windows are locked as well?’ Mirtai asked him.
‘We’ll break one.’ He shrugged. ‘The building’s high enough so that a broken window won’t be all that visible from the ground.’
‘Don’t be too obvious, Stragen,’ Caalador cautioned him. ‘I’ve got the feeling that we’ll be going back inside every night for the next week or two. That’s a large building.’