Chapter 18
The day was spent between fitful bouts of sleep and crawling thoughts of dark shadows in the corners. Twice, Ember awoke and wasn’t sure where she was; one of those times, she was sure she heard something slithering across the floor, dragging and contorting and slapping against the bedposts and furniture as it went. Too terrified to look, and unsure if the slug could climb, she sat frozen in terror in her bed, making no sound, for nearly three hours.
When the window finally started to glow with the red rays of sunset, Ember wasn’t even sure she would be able to get out of bed. She rolled over, looking at the spider in the jar on the nightstand. He, at least, should be allowed to get on with his life.
Ember stood up, throwing open the blinds and wincing at the blast of heat and light that came through the window. It was almost like one of Gina’s bonfires. Inching open the window just enough, Ember slid the note back under the jar and inched it back out onto the sill, tipping it open and giving the spider a light blow to get him moving. She set the jar right side up and pulled the note back in. Just as she was about to shut the window, she saw another note tucked into a gap in the wood trim on the side of the window. She leaned against the frame to get her arm out far enough to reach it.
Pulling it back in, and bracing her hands to push the window shut, she saw Acton leaning against a tree several yards from the house. His hair was wet and shining in the fading sunlight, and even with the glare, Ember could swear he smiled at her as he gave her a small wave.
The whole thing was so normal that it made her skin crawl. If what she had surmised was correct, he was a dark thing on the inside.
They were all monsters wearing human skin.
She threw herself back onto the bed, sighing and groaning. Whenever she didn’t sleep well, her body knew it. Her muscles ached and her joints creaked, and the light buzz of a migraine clawed at the back of her right eye.
Acton could help those things. In the presence of demons, a person could saw off their own fingers. The pain didn’t mean anything when the world was a jar of fireflies and color.
She knew it was unnatural. She was starting to believe Gina that they could kill her. And even though she knew both of those things were wrong, she didn’t care. Her life hadn’t turned out the way she had wanted it to, she didn’t have rules to play by anymore, and these demons—even if they were demons—were her friends. At least, she wanted to believe they were.
Rubbing at her eyes and opening the note, Ember knew she couldn’t stay in bed any longer. Acton knew she was up, and his casual wave and friendly smile still haunted her.
Come out tonight. Isaac has a surprise for you.
Ember slowly shook her head. The young man who had decided to keep Kaylee’s severed fingers had a surprise for her. She hadn’t quite figured out who Kaylee was to the Knox brothers, but she always seemed to be around. When she had met Kaylee, she had thought she was Asher’s girlfriend, but more recently, she seemed to be with Isaac.
As she tried to pull together a plan, she got up and slipped out of Ethel’s flowery nightgown and into a pair of pants and a shirt, rolling them up as needed. She pulled open her bag and grabbed her brush, hastily pulling it through her hair. There were more knots and tangles than usual, probably from all of her tossing and turning, and Ember hesitated in front of the little mirror that Ethel had hung above her dresser. When her hair tangled, it got frizzy when a brush was taken to it, and Ember abhorred the fact that today she looked more like Gina than Thalia. She once again wished she had the supplies and knowledge to dye her hair a different color.
She took one of the hair ties that Charles had given her and pulled it back as best she could, and eventually trudged to the bathroom to dampen her hair to make it lie flat. Walking down the stairs, she heard the voices at the breakfast table stop at her approach. Thalia refused to look up at her when she passed the table to go to the kitchen, where Gina was chopping up vegetables and throwing them into a crockpot.
Ember took a glass from the cabinet and filled it at the sink, and then leaned against the counter as she slowly gulped it down and watched her mother. There were carrots, onions, tomatoes, and celery lined up by the chopping board, but as Ember recalled, Charles only sold canned goods.
“Did you order all of those in?” Ember asked, keeping her voice low.
“I grew them all in the garden,” Gina said, shaking her head and setting the knife down on the counter unnecessarily hard. “You’re not to speak in this house, remember?”
Wiping her hands on a dish towel, she went to sit with Thalia at the table. Wandering over to the window, Ember was surprised that Gina could get such a harvest so far north, but she had never had a gift with plants, so she wasn’t sure if it was unusual or not. She wasn’t even sure if Gina had only said it to brush her off.
She made herself some toast, ate it in silence, and was inspecting the contents of the knife block by the refrigerator when a thought occurred to her. Finding the butcher knife that Gina had used to threaten her the night that she had wandered out, she picked it up and tried to fit it in her pocket. It was too big, but there was a smaller carving knife that she thought she could hide at her hip if she positioned it correctly down the leg of her pants.
Taking it with her, she held it out in front of Gina at the table.
“Is this what you use to fight them?” she asked. “If I take it with me, could I use it to defend myself?”
Thalia pushed her bowl away and started shaking. Gina pulled her into a hug, glaring at Ember. She didn’t say anything, but Ember swallowed hard at the look in her eyes.
If she thought she needed a knife, she was already as good as dead. The knives were only as good as the person who wielded them.
Ember took the knife with her anyways, using it to cut a small hole in the waist hem of her pants to free the pull string and make a catch for the knife to hang on as she tucked it in against her leg. She held her hand as inconspicuously as she could, walking slowly so that she didn’t cut herself open as she went out to meet with the Knox boys.
The sun was below the tree level by that point, and the world was stuck between night and day. It was bright enough for Ember to still see clearly, but dark enough that the colors had dulled, giving the world the appearance that everything was on a black and white television screen. Acton was still standing by the same tree he had been when she had seen him from the window.
“You came,” he said, taking a few steps toward her. He didn’t smile, but his eyes flashed with subtle delight.
“You left me notes,” Ember said, hoping she could get her questions answered while she was still within screaming distance of the house. Gina wasn’t likely to come for the sake of her rescue, but Ember hoped she would for the sake of the bloodbath. “You’ve never done that before.”
“I had to contend with Ethel before, but she’s gone now.” A wide grin spread across his face. “Now, it’s only Gina. She has to look after Thalia, so you belong to me.”
“Was it her, in the fire?” Ember asked, trying to act like the event hadn’t shaken her.
Acton seemed to consider for a moment, his smile never fading, and his eyes lingered on the awkward posture of her hand against her side for a moment too long.
He looked her in the eye. “No. That was one of us. His name was Joseph. His absence is the reason you’re remembering better. Feeling a little bit sharper, perhaps.”
Ember hadn’t heard anything, but the goose bumps on her arms told her that someone was behind her. She drew her knife and turned around.
Asher looked down at the knife in Ember’s hands and laughed, clapping his hands together and the pressing his index fingers to his lips as he shook his head. “Oh, my god. You’re serious.”
Ember took a few steps back, trying to get enough distance between herself, Acton, and Asher that she could see them both at the same time. As she walked backwards, a set of cold hands landed on her shoulders, and she spun again.
&nbs
p; Isaac was behind her, chewing his lip nervously as he stared at the knife in her hands. He carefully maneuvered around her to stand between Asher and Acton. Asher’s face was still glowing as he stared at Ember, brandishing a knife at the three of them.
“Did your mother give you that?” he asked.
Ember hesitated. The look in Isaac’s eyes said he had seen a Gillespie with a knife before, and suddenly, she felt foolish, and even a little guilty. “No. I took it.”
“Even better.” Asher took two steps forward, but stopped in his tracks when Acton spoke.
“Leave her alone, Ash.” He walked forward himself. “She belongs to me now. I’ll handle it.”
He walked within an arm’s reach of her. Ember kept the knife between them.
“Are you going to cut me, Ember?” he asked, his voice low and gentle.
“What are you?” she asked, the shaking finally winning over in her voice. “Are you one of those things I saw in the fire? Are you a thing inside a person?”
“I’m who you’ve come to know,” Acton said simply, holding his hands out genially and then letting them drop to his sides. “And I assure you, this body is mine. I was born with it.” He turned to look at Isaac and Asher before turning back to her. “Our common affliction allows us to regenerate our bodies if we are injured, and that is likely what you saw. It was the last piece of Joseph, trying to crawl away to heal himself.”
“Like Kaylee’s fingers.” Ember said quietly. Acton nodded. Shaking her head, she held her grip on the knife. “I have another question.”
“Ask it,” Acton replied. “I reserve the right to refuse an answer.”
“You keep calling her a hunter,” she said. “What is that? Is she human, or is she—”
“Normal humans don’t kill people like us,” Acton said with a sudden frown. “I’m afraid the food chain moves in the opposite direction. No, she’s not human.”
“Am I—?”
“You’re human,” he said, seeming disappointed. “For now, at least. I wasn’t sure before, but…” His eyes wandered, and he gave a nod, looking suddenly sad. “You’re most definitely human.”
“Why is my mother protecting you?” The words came out harsher than she had intended, and for the first time, Ember felt the resentment that had been brewing in her every time her mother had told her not to go but refused to be a mother and actually stop her. “Is she your mother, too?”
Acton’s face went stony and rigid as he clenched his jaw. What little playfulness that had been in his eyes before disappeared, and it was replaced by cold indifference. “That’s utter nonsense, Ember. Now, either use that knife or give it to me—I’m done with this game.”
He took another step forward, moving an arm out toward her, and without thinking, Ember gave a shriek and thrust the knife out before her.
The world went quiet. With her eyes closed and her heart pounding, she could feel the knife still in her hand, but her thumb and forefinger were resting against something soft. Slowly, she opened her eyes.From where she was cowering on the ground, she could see around Acton’s legs to where Isaac and Asher had been standing.
They were gone.
Her eyes drifted up, to where her hand was still holding the knife that had disappeared in Acton’s stomach. There was a look of shock on his face, and though Ember found it hard to believe, he was more surprised than she was. He swatted away her hand and wrenched the knife from his gut as Ember scrambled away backwards, staring at the blackened blade as he took several long, slow breaths.
When he finally turned his gaze back on Ember, it was relaxed and deliberate. He was completely calm, and Ember suddenly knew why his brothers had gone.
Acton had been stabbed, and someone was going to die. It wasn’t going to be Acton.
She flipped onto her stomach and tried to gain traction on the forest floor, but Acton had her by the back of her shirt before she could even get up.
“It was an accident!” she screamed. “An accident!”
He had one arm around her stomach, and the other her arms against her body in a bear hug. When he spoke, his mouth was pressed close to her ear. His breath was as cold as his words. “You’re bolder than I thought, Em. You don’t fight. You don’t stand up for yourself. You lay down and take it, like you’ve always taken it, because you refuse to live your life. You didn’t want it so you gave your life to me, and I took care of you. I made you mine. Not once, not ever, did I ever think you would stab me!”
“I learned it from you!” she hissed back at him. She hit him hard, right where she had stabbed him with the carving knife, and he let her go.
She took several quick strides before a noise made her stumble. It wasn’t Asher or Isaac, and it wasn’t Acton coming after her. It was something quieter, like a stifled cough. She looked over her shoulder just long enough to see if Acton was still there.
He was standing there, with his hands in his pockets, laughing. And behind him, Gina was standing there, with Thalia half hiding behind her.
Ember stopped; this was the moment. One of them wasn’t leaving this place.
Still smiling as black blood dripped down his pants leg, he bent over and picked up the knife from where he had dropped it. He turned around to face Gina as she reached a hand back for Thalia, forcing her further behind her body.
“Your daughter plays rough,” Acton said, casually gesturing back at Ember with the knife. “You shouldn’t leave these things lying around where children can find them. Someone could get hurt.”
She was holding Thalia behind her with both hands as Acton walked towards her with the knife. “Asher said—“
“Ash brought you,” Acton said, stopping an arm’s reach away from her. “I’ll be sure to thank him. Gina, you didn’t even come out when she bled. I’m honored.”
They stared at each other. Thalia had crouched down low behind her mother’s leg, whimpering. Ember felt herself walking toward them. When Gina’s eyes flashed to her, burning a hole in her head, Ember felt herself speak.
“It was an accident…”
Acton must have smiled, because the scowl on Gina’s face deepened, making her look years older. She was tired, and for the first time, Ember was aware of the bags under her eyes.
In one swift motion, Acton turned the knife in his hand, holding it by the blade as he offered it to Gina. Slowly, she took one hand away from Thalia, and allowed him to place the knife in her hand. Her eyes moved from the knife to Acton’s face, looking caught between gratitude, anger, and confusion.
Thalia’s voice was little more than a squeak. “Mom.”
Isaac had appeared out of the forest behind them, and though she couldn’t see Asher, Ember knew he was there. They were surrounded.
“Now,” Acton said quietly. “You can use that knife, or not. But only one of them is leaving here with you. You know my preference.”
Thalia stood up, and started pulling at Gina’s shirt. “Mom…”
Acton’s jaw clenched as Thalia’s whines continued to get louder. “Shut her up. We’re trying to talk.”
Clenching her jaw, Gina’s eyes looked from Acton to Ember, and the sadness there hardened. As Ember stared at her, a shadow of the woman who had screamed into a fire, she hoped that she would suddenly flare again, tell Acton to step off, and drag Ember back to the house by her arm.
“Are you doing that?” Ember asked over the sound of Thalia’s crying. “Are you making her act like that?”
“No,” he responded with a sneer. His eyes never left Gina. She dropped the knife and spun around, slapping Thalia across the face so hard that she yelped and fell to the ground at Isaac’s feet. “But I did that.”
“Acton!” Ember yelled, trying to run forward. He had out his arm, blocking her from going to her sister.
Gina stood frozen in shock. Bringing both hands to her mouth, she knelt down next to her daughter as Isaac leapt away. “Lia I’m so sorry!”
“It’s okay!” Thalia choked through a sob. Her
face was red, and the skin on her cheekbone looked like it might have almost broken. She touched it tenderly as Gina whirled on Acton with malice in her eyes.
The knife was back her hand as she spat her words at him. “You want Ember. Fine—take her. But you leave Thalia alone! You take her, and you leave Thalia alone. That’s the deal?”
Acton nodded calmly.
“It’s a deal,” Gina said gruffly. “But you mark my words, Acton. Stay out of my head. Stay out of Thalia’s head. And don’t you dare turn Ember. Because if you do—if you break this deal—” She had the knife pointed directly at Acton’s chest, but as she paused, her eyes narrowed and she turned it on Ember. “I’ll kill her. It’s kinder than what you have in store. Don’t test me.”
She took the knife, turned around, and ushered Thalia past Isaac and back toward the house. Acton turned back around to face Ember.
With her jaw hanging open, Ember was still trying to figure out if the things she had witnessed had really just happened. “She…she wants to kill me. She left me…”
“She left you years ago.” Acton sighed, looking at the sky. It was almost full dark. “And I’m sure she doesn’t want to kill you. She just knows very well that I hate boredom, and you’ve been keeping me entertained.”
Closing her eyes, Ember shook her head. She had known, but this time it was real. Her mother had looked her in the eye, and then thrown her to the wolves. She had chosen one daughter over the other, and it had been easy.
“Don’t ever do that to my sister again,” she said distantly. She scanned the forest, but Isaac was gone again, and she suspected that Asher was, too. They had probably followed Gina back at a safe distance to be sure she wasn’t returning.
“Don’t ever stab me again.” Acton frowned. “And I am not Gina Gillespie’s son, or any other relation to her. There’s nothing between us but old insults that need repayment.”
Ember shook her head lightly. “She favors you.”
“You’ve mistaken her pointed cruelties toward me for favoritism.” A light smile flashed on his thin lips before he looked back at her. He put an arm around her shoulders.
“Cruelties?”
Acton pressed his lips together, but eventually nodded. “I did something, a long time ago. Something unspeakably evil, by your mother’s reaction. She told me that she would never kill me. I’ve seen many individuals come here, and accept her offer of amnesty as long as they followed the rules. Then they broke the rules, and Gina burned them alive. But not me, Ember. She swore to me that as long as the both of us were alive, she wouldn’t kill me. She wouldn’t let me go. She would just keep me here, forever.”
“But—you leave, I know you leave—”
“From time to time.” Acton nodded; his voice sounded slow and thick. “But they keep me on my toes. This island is the only place I can rest.”
Staring at him, and the look in his eyes, Ember suddenly realized what he was getting at.
“You hate it,” she said quietly. “You’re pushing her because you want her to do it. You want to die?”
With the light almost gone, Acton’s eyes flashed a deep red glow when he looked over at her.
“What I want,” he said. “Is to make Gina a liar. And until the day I force her to break her vow, she’ll let me do whatever I want.”
Ember shifted uncomfortably, but Acton didn’t move away. She gave him a sideways glance. “What am I going to do now?”
“You’re going to come out with me, like you do every night.” Acton shrugged. “You’ll help me impress people at the bar because I’ve got Gina’s daughter on my arm, and try on some of the clothes from Kaylee. Then, I’ll take you out by the spring and we’ll watch the stars because that’s what you like, and I’ll bring you home at night and you can use your mother’s house like a hotel. That’s all we ever have to do, forever.”
“Forever?” Ember repeated, her heart sinking.
Acton’s eyes were fixed on her face. When he didn’t respond, she looked over and saw the expression on his face.
“Death in a trap. Of course.”
Ember furrowed her brow. “What?”
“Nothing.” Acton frowned, taking his arm away from her shoulders. It swung awkwardly at his side until he tucked his hand into his pocket. Ember crossed her arms. “Come out with me tonight to keep me company. I promise I’ll let you go when it’s dawn.”