Read The Sword of Ruth: The Story of Jesus' Little Sister Page 53
Raven
"It's only when we ignore the beauty in life, that we lose our way. Go with that beauty, Raven. It is part of who you are."
I could still hear Grandma White Bear's voice, firm, low and steady, speaking to me as I fell asleep beneath her bearskin comforter. Two weeks every summer I had spent with her in her cabin in the woods. Two weeks she spent teaching me the old ways, ways of the spirit that she said I must never forget.
"Remember yourself," she had said. "Remember Tulugaukuk."
Seated cross-legged on the bed, I slipped into a mind-quieting exercise she had taught me. I pictured myself as a bird soaring through an open sky, feeling the lift under my wings, the breeze smoothing my feathers, allowing myself to glide.
A knock came to the door.
Startled, thinking I needed to slip something over my shorty tee shirt and skimpy undies, I said, "Who is it?"
"Me."
"Oh, uh, come in."
Felipe entered carrying a tray of cookies and milk.
"They're chocolate chip, right out of the oven," he said. "Nice outfit."
"Thanks. Cookies are good," I said, grinning, patting the bed in front of me, causing my uncorralled breasts to bounce. "Grandma White Bear used to say that the best way to enjoy cookies is to sit cross-legged, knee to knee with someone you love and pig out. Join me?"
Felipe climbed onto the bed and crossed his legs yogi-style. I scooted closer until our knees touched.
"Does that mean you love me?" he asked, his eyes twinkling.
"Well...."
In my mind I could see Grandma White Bear grinning at me. She had been a woman of multiple passions as well as intense spirituality. She said that if Tulugaukuk hadn't wanted us to enjoy sex, he wouldn't have made it fun.
"This is a better night than I thought," he said.
Munching a cookie, I said, "These are excellent. Grandma said that when she was little she used to go on hunts with her grandfather. He was trying to teach her to bag seals. He thought women should know how, too. But she didn't want to kill seals. She just wanted to see them. So she prayed and prayed something would happen so they wouldn't have to kill any. One night they were in an ice house, an igloo kind of thing. Grandpa brought out a bag of store-bought cookies. They sat knee to knee on an old bear rug and ate all the cookies."
"Did they bring them luck?"
"Grandpa had a sick stomach the next day. The seals kept getting away. Grandma said after that she believed in the power of cookies."
"What kind were they?" His eyes gleamed as lights in a storm. Sometimes I needed that kind of light. In them was an inherent playfulness, something I had been missing for so long.
"Chocolate chip."
"I didn't know Eskimos had chocolate chips."
With the seriousness of a monk, I said, "She told me chocolate chips cookies have great power. She said they could even make dreams come true."
"And you believed her?"
"I was four."
He bridged the space between us and kissed me. It was a slow kiss, gentle, endearing. I untangled my legs and was about to scoot onto his lap.
Critter awoke from her favorite spot on the chair in the corner of the room, hopped onto the bed and climbed in between us.
"I see our little interloper is back," Felipe said. "Do you think we can bribe her?"
"As along as we make sure she doesn't get any chocolate."
Felipe broke off a piece of cookie and fed it to Critter. He popped a chocolate chip into my mouth and ate one himself. After carefully removing all the chips from three cookies he placed the broken pieces and the cat onto the floor. She licked his hand and munched the treats.
"Now, where were we?" he said.
I scooted onto his lap and touched my lips to his. A kiss of hesitation grew into one of urgency.