Read The Thetas Page 8


  “If she’s going to be a full Theta Sister she’s gonna need a Brazillian.” Abigail insists.

  “Okay. Lin is waiting for you in Room #5.”

  “You think Room #5 will do Jun? Marcia asks. “It’s her first time.”

  Jun smiles at Marcia. “Don’t worry, we had it soundproofed last week.”

  Soundproofing? Okay I’m getting a little scared. “Does it hurt that bad?” I ask.

  “The results are so gonna be worth it.” Abigail reassures. “And Lin is the best at this.”

  That doesn’t answer my question in a way that makes me feel comfortable. I give my new friends a look that’s greeted with rolled eyes. “Do you want us to go in with you Big Baby?” Marcia asks.

  “Yes.”I insist.

  I follow Marcia and Abigail down the hall. We enter Room #5 where we’re greeted by Lin, a slender Asian woman. “I didn’t know we were offering services to a group today.” She jokes.

  “She’s a big baby.”Abigail teases. “She can’t go in by herself.”

  Lin looks me up and down and takes my hand. “It’s your first time isn’t it?”

  “Yeah.” I mutter.

  “Well, you should have support for your first time.” Lin says patting my hand. “You two can have seats over there.”

  Marcia and Abigail have a seat in a pair of chairs right next to the changing screen as Lin hands me a pair of paper panties. I step behind the screen, change into the paper briefs, streak out from behind the screen and take a deep breath as I lie down on the cushioned table. Lin takes a moment to assess the hair on my pubic mound. She grimaces as she looks out at Marcia and Abigail.

  “I think I’m going to have to charge extra for this.” Lin jokes.

  Very funny. Everyone’s getting a cheap shot at Colleen’s pubes today. Lucky for me I have thicker skin than the hair between my legs. “Your tip will be very generous.” I retort.”

  “It would have to be with a cavewoman pussy like yours.” Lin teases.

  Okay, message received. I have been doing a lousy job of taking care of myself. I will schedule a pube rip once a month after this. “Can we please get on with the waxing?” I request.

  Let’s get rid of these.” Lin says peeling off my paper panties. “I’m going to have to use the clippers before I wax.”

  Sounds reasonable. Lin works quietly as I hear the buzz of a trimmer and watch as she runs the shaver up and down my pubic area. It feels a little lighter down there as hair falls off my mound and on the table. I feel a cool rush of air as she takes a blow dryer and blows the trimmed off hair on the floor.

  There’s a long pause as Lin turns to the counter next to the table to prepare her supplies. She soon sprinkles some baby powder on a portion of my pubic area then presses a strip of cotton into it. The wax feels warm like bath water. Lin catches my eyes. “Are you ready?”

  If this is what wax feels like it can’t be that bad. “I’m ready.” I reply.

  I hear a violent rip as the strip is pulled away from my skin. No wonder they soundproofed the room, it does hurt that bad. “AAAAUUUUGGGGHHHH!” I scream as she pulls the strip of wax away from my skin.

  I look down at my area and notice how little hair was pulled out. “How much longer?”

  “We’re just getting started.”Lin says. “It’s going to be at least an hour for Brazillian.”

  It has to be worth it, it has to be to endure pain this agonizing. Lin applies another strip of wax to my crotch. “ARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!” I scream as the wax is pulled away from my skin again.

  I can only grow from pain. I can only grow from pain. I chant the mantra as Lin rips more hair out of my lower body. In the middle of my suffering I look over at Marcia and Abigail laughing their butts off. Some support I’m getting from my Sisters.

  “You’re having fun over there aren’t you?” I snap.

  “Oh Yeah.” Marcia quips.

  “If you only saw your face.” Abigail laughs.

  “You guys are just wrong.” I say.

  “Not as wrong as you are for letting your pubes grow out for two years.”Abigail teases.

  Yeah, this is my fault. If I had taken care of business with my intimate area I wouldn’t be facing this public humiliation right now. Over the next hour the laughter continues as my legs are moved around and wax is applied in my private places and ripped out ruthlessly. Marcy is practically in tears, and Abby has laughed herself hoarse listening to my screams. Lin tells me to turn around I ease over on my stomach as she gets the last spots of hair in my inner thigh areas. When she finishes, she sprays some lotion on my pubic mound, between my legs and smacks me on the butt.

  “You think this is bad, try having a baby.” She quips.

  Memo to self: Get my tubes tied when I get back to the city.

  “You’re done.” Lin tells me as she pats me on the back.

  I feel a cool breeze rush between my legs as I hop off the table. I have to admit, it does feel a lot better down there without all that hair.

  I feel Marcia and Abby’s eyes on my crotch as they jump out of their chairs. “Now you meet the Theta standard for Vanity.” Abby says.

  I’ll have to see if it meets the Colleen Anderson standard for vanity when I get back to the house. “Thanks for the seal of approval Abby.”

  “Man, you did a great job on her Lin.”Marcia complements. “She’s really smooth.”

  I’d love to touch myself to feel what it’s like but I’m in public. I’ll have to wait until I get back to the House. “It’s going to be so much better after this.” Abigail reassures. “You’re going to feel so much cleaner.”

  We’ll have to see about that. I reach into my purse. “How much do I owe you Lin?”

  “The Thetas have an expense account. But tips are appreciated.”

  She deserves something extra and enduring all my screaming. I reach into my purse and pull out a $50 bill. It’s more than I’d tip usually, but after working on a cavewoman pussy like mine she deserves a bonus. “And I appreciate you cleaning up my stuff.”

  Lin lights up at the sight of the fifty. “I appreciate your generosity. Just keep waxing every month and you’ll be okay.”

  “Thanks.”

  I head behind the screen and get dressed. As I step from behind the screen I feel a spark light inside me. “Let’s go buy me a slipdress.”

  Chapter 21

  I feel a spring in my step as we leave the salon and head down Main Street. For some reason I feel energized from the whole experience. Yeah, the waxing hurt. But I got through it. I’m still here. And now I feel confident enough to try a slipdress on.

  “Someone is feeling good.” Marcia says.

  “I’m having a good day Marcy.” I reply.

  “We almost drown you, take you to get hairs ripped out of your body and you’re having a good day.” Abigail says. “I think you’re bonding with us.”

  I admit I do feel a little more connected to Abby than I did yesterday. Maybe Marcy and I can get closer shopping.

  “True friends come together during a crisis.”

  “And during shopping.” Marcia says. “You’re going to love Madame Panache. The stuff there is amazing.”

  Marcia gets the door for us as we walk into Madame Panache, a designer boutique. The clothes on the antique wooden racks and tables are Italian, tailored, and look expensive. Perfect for Slipdress Sunday.

  As we step into the store, a gray haired almond colored woman approaches us. I can’t place where I remember her from but I recognize her. “Welcome to Madame Panache. How may I help you?”

  “Penelope, this is Colleen. She needs a slipdress for Sunday.”

  Penelope. I remember that name associated with her face. I search my memory and notice the diamond and platinum pin on Penelope’s dress is the same as the one on Marcia and Abigail’s lapels. And the amicable way she greeted us was different from the professional way Lin greeted us in the salon. I think she’s a fellow Sister.

  Are you a Theta?”
I ask.

  Peneolpe lights up. “Since 1962.” Penelope says. “You’re the new Pledge. Millie’s daughter?”

  I’m surprised she knows so much about me. “How’d you know about me?”

  “Your Aunt Margaret told me you were pledging us this summer.”

  Figures. Auntie has a big mouth. “You know my mother?”

  “Your mother was my Big Sister in 62’. We stayed close for years after that.”

  There’s a long pause as Penelope reflects on her memories of my mother. “Your mother was a great lady. I loved her very much.”

  The gentle way she says that jars my six–year–old memory. “She was. I think I remember my mom talking to you on the phone a few times. You always talked about clothes.”

  Penelope lights up as she reminisces about mom. “That was our thing. We’d talk for hours about clothes. She’d come into my shop all the time to buy dresses during her weekend jaunts up here with your father–”

  That gives me another clue to where I am. If mom could shop here during the weekends I know I’m in New York and I’m probably not too far from home.

  “And one time you came by the penthouse to deliver clothes to her– A little black dress?”

  “Yes, your father was having a cocktail party and your mother needed a dress to hostess. It took hours to drive from here to the city, but I got it to her about fifteen minutes before her party started.”

  I think I remember that night faintly. Mom was nervous about leaving a solid first impression on some French clients Daddy was having over for dinner. She dressed me up in a burgundy velvet dress and told me to be a very good girl. I ate my dinner, didn’t say much and Mom put me to bed around nine.

  The memory fades as I ponder what dress I’d like to buy. “You know you look just like her when she was younger. Penelope says walking around me. “And you have her hourglass figure too. I have just the dress for you.”

  Penelope walks us over to a rack of high–end designer dresses and fishes through it. “You’re a 4 right?” she inquires as she looks through the garments.

  “Did the sisters tell you my size?”

  “No, I could tell by looking at you.”

  Penelope comes up with a slinky spaghetti strapped champagne colored slipdress in my size. “This is going to look fabulous on you.”

  I look the dress over. Italian tailored silk with a fitted bodice and a hem that falls just at my knee. Not what I’d usually wear, but I’ll give it a try since the Theta party is all women.

  The fitting room is over there.” Penelope says pointing to a booth across the sales floor.”

  I rush into the fitting room, peel out of my suit and get into the dress. This silk feels so smooth against my skin; it’s like I’m wearing liquid. I turn and get a look at myself in the full length mirror on the wall. I can tell it’s a perfect fit by the way it flows with my curves. And I packed just the shoes to go with this sexy little number. But I better get a second opinion from my Big Sisters before I have Penelope ring me up.

  I step out of the fitting room. Marcia and Abigail light up at the sight of me in my new dress.

  “Wow, you look great.” Abby says.

  “That’s hot.” Marcia says.

  As I get a look at myself in the full length mirror on the sales floor, I start seeing the flaws in the dress I fell in love with in the fitting room. Penelope senses my hesitation and tries to save the sale.

  “These straps are a little thin. How am I going to get a bra under here?”

  “You don’t wear a bra with this kind of dress.” Penelope says. “You wear petals.”

  Penelope hands me package of what look like fleshtone colored flowers stuck to a cardboard. How are these supposed to support my breasts?

  “Petals?”

  “Yes. You stick them on your breasts to keep your nipples from showing under lower–cut dresses like this.”

  “Or you can use band–aids if you’re in a hurry.” Abby replies.

  “Band–aids are quick and dirty. Petals make for a smoother line under thin material like this.” Penelope says.

  “It seems a little extreme just to wear a dress.” I say. “I don’t know if I want to be hanging out all day. I kind of like having a little support under my clothes.”

  “Sometimes you have to make sacrifices for fashion.”Abby says. “You can get away without wearing a bra for Slipdress Sunday.”

  I guess I can make a small sacrifice for one day. With Slipdress Sunday being a clambake, I won’t have to worry about any guys trying to sneak a peek of a sideboob. And I look too hot in this dress to pass it up. “I’m gonna take it–”

  Before you take it Colleen, do you have any other underwear?” Penelope asks.

  “What do you mean?”

  “You’ve got some panty lines.”

  I look down at my perfect dress and see the silhouette of my silk La Perla panties under it. “You’re going to need something with a little less coverage.” Penelope says.

  “Less coverage? As low as I go are string bikinis.”

  Penelope walks over to a table and picks up something that looks like two pieces of string tied to the front of a crotch. “These won’t leave any panty lines under a dress like that.” She says handing what are supposed to be underwear to me.

  I grimace at what I think are panties. “What is this dental floss?” I ask.

  “It’s a G–string.”Abby replies. “You wear them under close fitting dresses.”

  I give her a look as I examine the G–string. “Abby, these aren’t panties. That’s the thread someone would use to start making a pair of panties.”

  “But it’s not going to leave any panty lines.” Abby insists.

  “How am I supposed to enjoy Slipdress Sunday with no bra and a string up my butt?”

  “You won’t even feel it once you put it on.” Penelope reassures.

  “Or you could just wear no underwear at all.” Marcia says.

  Great, I can either walk around with no underwear hoping a wind doesn’t go the wrong way showing my bald girl junk to the Theta Alumni or glorified band–aids on my breasts and a string up my butt. The things I do to honor the memory of my mother.

  “I just hope you don’t have Mexican food on the menu Sunday.”

  Chapter 22

  Penelope rings up my dress and my new supposed to be underwear. After she gently wraps the dress in tissue paper then places it in a shopping bag with my new lingerie, she hands me her business card along with the shopping bag. I’m definitely going to be in touch with her in the future. I may even come back here again. I saw a white blouse on a mannequin that I think would look good on me.

  As we head out of Madame Panache, Abby checks her watch and smiles at me. I take it we still have some time to hang out.

  “Rumsfeld will be back around three to pick us up. Let’s go put some food in you.” She tells me.

  “I’m good.” I say.

  “All you had was lunch yesterday Colleen.”Abby says. “You really need to eat something–”

  “Don’t you want me to lose weight?”

  We don’t want you starving yourself to get there.” Marcy replies.

  “I just don’t want to mess things up and ruin my family’s legacy–”

  “Don’t put that pressure on yourself.” Abby says. “We’re all going to work with you to get in shape.”

  “It’s bad enough you missed a meal this morning.” Marcy continues.

  “I was so nervous I couldn’t even eat breakfast yesterday. It was a miracle I kept lunch down–”

  “You don’t want that turning into a habit. All it’s going to do is get you an eating disorder.”

  Nice to know they care about me and aren’t going to pressure me to lose weight before I become a Sister. And now that my nerves are settled I really have a taste for a cheeseburger now.

  “So, where’s a good place to get a cheeseburger?” I ask.

  “There’s a place at the end of the strip th
at makes the best burgers.” Abby replies.

  As Abby leads me down the strip, I decide to learn more about her experiences with petals and G–strings. It doesn’t seem like a good Christian girl like her would have things like that in her wardrobe.

  “So you’ve worn g–strings before?” I ask.

  “Yeah.” Abby replies. “At my senior prom in high school and some parties my parents were having.”

  “And you didn’t feel slutty with them on?”

  “Er…I wasn’t wearing it for a slut purpose.” Abby retorts.

  “Don’t put a sexual connotation on lingerie.” Marcy says. “Underwear is supposed to be for a purpose.”

  My eyes grow wide. “You wear them too?”

  “I have one on now.” Marcy quips.

  My eyes grow wide. “You are nasty–”

  “I’m not nasty.” Marcy says. “This is a soft linen suit and I don’t want panty lines under it.”

  “You are not borrowing any of my clothes.” I insist.

  “You must really like me to be offering up your wardrobe.”

  Guess I am feeling a little closer to her. “I kind of liked that pink suit you had on a couple of days ago. But now that I know you wear string draws under your clothes I’ma have to buy my own.”

  “Guess you won’t be borrowing my stuff either.” Abigail quips. “I was wearing a thong under that suit I wore yesterday.”

  And that was a cute suit too. “You are some nasty hoes–”

  “It’s whore Col.” Marcy corrects. “And I am not a whore because I wear G–strings. I haven’t even slept with guy yet.”

  “You’re still a virgin?”

  “I plan on being one until my wedding night.” Marcy replies.

  “And I’m saving myself for that day too.” Abby says. “I want my father to be proud of me when he walks me down the aisle.”

  “I guess I need to learn to stop being so judgmental.”

  “…And Colleen comes to another revelation about herself.” Marcy teases.

  “The more she learns the better person she’ll become.” Abby jokes.

  Why is personal growth always so embarrassing? “Look, I’m sorry about calling you hoes–”

  “Hey, I’m not offended.” Marcy continues “I used to think just like you a year ago. I was so Christian at one time I used to think everything my Church didn’t teach me was sinful and I was nasty for doing things like masturbating–”

  “You shouldn’t let people guilt trip you about that–”