*
For the next couple of weeks, I memorized their every move, adhering to Chris’s advice and jotting down notes. Watching them excessively from the side-lines did give me some insights into their personalities, based on the fluidity of their movements. Tre was the quick and impulsive one, while Kevin’s moves were more aggressive. Blue was smooth and daring, like a cat with nine lives. When they came together, there was no separation between them, and no way to distinguish the best from the worst; they were simply three bold personalities meshed into one.
Chris never trained with them, so I couldn’t detect his style. I just knew he was the main authority: simple, direct, and superior. And yet, he was didn't misuse his authority-power. He was the caretaker and gifted to be in charge.
Ever since he confronted me at the pool, his instruction for me had stayed the same; while the others took the front line, I stayed in the back seat. As a consequence, I started going to the gym alone after nightfall and practicing without his permission. If he wasn't going to train me, then I had to at least teach myself on my own time.
Tonight I followed the same routine. After practicing in the gym, I ended up falling asleep near the warm-up mirrors. At a quarter past five in the morning, I opened my eyes and let out a short muffled yawn, extending my arms. My fingers slid over the edges of my notebook, which rested loosely across my chest.
Having slept on a stack of yoga mats, I stared over the cracks on the top of the ceiling and continued listening to violin music on my i Pod. In the past, this was the same playlist I'd listen to right before dance rehearsal.
Even though my body was sore and numb in most places, I liked waking up in the gym and being the first one here in the morning. This showed how sincere I was about being here.
Sure it was a drastic change from Beverly Hills, but I had a few reasons for going along with the dramatic location shift. For one, I was happy to give Carl and Laura the space they needed to enjoy their love life. For two, I could finally properly grieve Dianne without anyone else intervening or projecting.
For three, most of all, Chris was here.
Gratitude took over and replaced every complaint I ever had about anyone. Soon my eyes drifted and grew heavy. Voices emerged from the ceiling as I stood up and shook out my legs, circling the cranks in my neck. It sounded like Kevin and Blue were upstairs already, tossing around plates of food and being enormously loud. The click-clacking continued. Usually they showed up here a few minutes before Tre did, and executed their normal routine.
As I carefully rolled up the mat and carried the blue foam under my arm, walking towards the front of the mirror, I stared at my lips and rubbed them together. Then something happened – something that should've been impossible.
My reflection didn’t move.
The ‘other me’ on the other side of the mirror wasn’t carrying anything, even though my arms were clearly (evidently) full. Her round oval eyes were widely fixed, staring back. I studied the image closer until her lips moved . . . when mines did not.
“It's in the water,” she whispered.
I woke up staring at the ceiling. I was still inside the gym where I’d fallen asleep, and lying on the mat, as though my life had rewound itself. Kevin and Blue’s voices neared the basement, and I leaped from the floor, gathering my mat and walking away from the mirrors. As I calmed my nerves, assuring myself it was only a dream and the girl in the mirror didn’t really exist, I realized there was nothing to be afraid of. Last night I must've too many bowls of vegetable chili.
Still, the hairs on my neck prickled, and before I had time enough to thoroughly examine what had taken place, Blue and Kevin were entering the gym. Their discussion halted when they saw me scurrying past them, but I was too to caught in my train of thought to care much about their reactions.
I ran down the hallway straight into the bathroom, and quickly captured the edges of the sink. The dim light was comforting as I stood in front of the mirror, rinsing my face and staring at the large glass in front of me.
“Pull it together.” I patiently waited for the ‘other me’ to reappear. Nothing happened. Some silent moments past, and still, the impossible didn't occur. My reflection didn’t alter like before, or change into something unfamiliar. As my breathing evened out, I realized everything was okay. All I had to was stand tall, shake off the dust, and go back to practice.
Everyone was already warming up when I walked back inside. At that point, Chris invited me to have a seat on the sidelines (as part of our usual routine). Grabbing my notebook, I sat on the floor in a corner and drew triangular shapes. While the others were busy doing their daily run-through, I couldn’t concentrate on anything else except for that girl's face in the mirror, mocking me and telling me 'It's in the water.'
“Pull those elbows in!” Chris ordered.
Blue climbed up the rope effortlessly. As soon as she reached the top of the line, she slid back down, letting her feet kiss the ground. “How bad I do, Coach?” she asked, as if it were possible for her to do a terrible job.
Chris studied the watch and tossed her the timer.
She gawked, and then shoved his arm like she’d just won the lottery. “No way.” She ran toward the mirrors and started doing the cha-cha, and making faces and cheering on her accomplishment.
This was a side of hers I'd never witnessed before. And the glitter in Chris’s eye was priceless. Rightfully so. One of his students just made a record-breaking time; one she obviously worked hard on getting. There was no denying the excitement they both felt in her moment of triumph.
She jumped onto Kevin’s back. “Woohoo!”
“Hey, let me see that.” Kevin grabbed the timer. “This is serious business.”
Tre hovered behind them. “Nice work, Squirrel Cat.”
“Don’t be a hater, Tre. It makes you look bad,” she joked. “Oops. Forgot. You can’t look any worse.”
Tre rolled his eyes and continued with Kevin toward the indoor pool. After catching up with the others and sitting in my notable green chair, which Chris had pulled out for me on my first day, I held my notebook in one hand and skimmed over notes I'd written.
“Alright, let’s get focused,” Chris had them gather at the farthest end of the pool. “You know the rules. Stay inside your lane. Watch your arms. Remember, this isn’t a race.”
Kevin winked at Blue, which meant it was a race. For them, it was always a race. “Sure thing, Coach.”
“Got it, Boss,” Tre said.
“We’re ready,” Blue replied.
Chris explained our future assignments would include dodging beams underwater. The pool prepared us for that kind of security. Seeing yellow lasers shoot inside the pool wasn’t like seeing glow sticks in the dark. This was the real deal. They were much larger, brighter, and more consequential. And if anyone hit a beam, the line would turn red, and everyone failed the assignment.
Of course that never actually happened. They were such a skillful impeccable group, no one ever actually made those kind of mistakes, like missing the mark. Timing and form were the only things that mattered for Blue, Tre, and Kevin. Each of them swam over these beams so easily, with wide consistent strokes, throwing one arm in front of the other.
Their rhythm was dynamic.
“Keep those chins down!” Chris ordered. “You’re movin’ like molasses, Kevin, let’s go!”
The coach’s jawline flexed in a tight way. I should have been taking notes. Instead, I found myself curling my legs, listening to him give orders. Observing his backside from the corner of the table, I almost melted into a pile of dip in front of everybody. He must’ve heard my thoughts, because he peered over his shoulder and grabbed my gaze for a beat longer than usual, pulling us closer in an invisible way.
“That’s enough for now.” He blew the whistle.
“What’s the matter, Coach?” Blue asked, swimming to the edge.
“Yeah, why'd you stop?” Kevin asked.
Chris turned to the
others. “I said it’s not a race. If you focus outside your lane, if you take one glimpse off center, that’s it. That’s all it takes. Get out of here. I'm taking a break.”
We expected him to elaborate about his sudden change of mood and explain what prompted such strong emotion. But he stomped toward the exit, leaving the door swinging after him.
Once he was gone, Blue and Kevin started arguing and blaming one another for his calm outburst. Tre over-talked them, as though they were children, as though the outcome was entirely their fault.
I, on the other hand, used the opportunity to learn what was really brewing inside Chris's head.