“I’m so sorry, Portia!” she cried into my hair, and my lips trembled unspeaking, as tears hit my face. “We love you so much.”
I thanked her with a nod, and the scene was repeated with each of the remaining coven members and their relatives.
When we finally made it into the house, it was to the smells of delicious food dishes that had been delivered to the kitchen. My stomach revolted at the thought of eating right now, and I continued up the stairs, going straight into my bedroom, closing the door behind me.
My cat, Jinx, was instantly upon me. I grabbed her up into my arms and carried her over to my bed as she wrapped her white paws around my neck, and I nuzzled my face into her fluffy white fur.
I let loose then.
“He died, Jinx! He died!” I cried into her fur, and I curled into a ball on the bed, holding her tightly against me.
She stayed there with me until I finally cried myself to sleep.
I was awakened some time later by a soft knock at the door.
“Come in,” I said groggily and sat up.
The door opened, and Krista slipped quietly into the room, her red-rimmed eyes showing in the dim light.
“I’m sorry!” I said bursting into tears once again. She rushed to my side and swept me up into her arms. “I tried to save him! I did everything I could think of, but nothing worked!”
“Hush, sweetheart,” she whispered in a choked voice, her tears falling upon my shoulder. “None of this is your fault.”
“He loved you so much!” I said, and she continued to hold me close. “All he ever hoped for was to find you again and have some kind of life with you. He missed you so badly in all the years that you were gone.”
“I know. I felt the same way,” she replied, her voice heavy with sorrow.
“When he found out where they had you, he wouldn’t listen to reason. No offense, but I tried to stop him. I knew they were using you as a lure to get him there,” I explained.
“That’s my boy,” she agreed. “He was always headstrong. Portia, you have to let this go. None of it was your fault.”
“Yes, it was,” I said, my voice shaking from the crying. “If I would’ve reacted faster when they first stabbed him, I might’ve been able to do something different, something that could’ve helped him somehow.”
Krista pulled back then so she could look at me.
“Portia, listen to me! Trying to have hindsight isn’t going to change anything. What’s done is done. Now we have to try to find a way to move on with our lives. Vance would want us both to do that. He loved us both, and he’d be miserable knowing that we’re miserable, too,” she said looking into my eyes.
“I know that,” I replied, and I hiccupped. “My head knows all the important things it needs to do. I just need someone or something to tell it to my heart,” I choked out.
“Give it time to catch up, sweetie,” she said, stroking her hand over my hair, similar to the way Vance used to. “Now I know this is a hard thing to do right away, but we need to plan this funeral. All of your family is downstairs. Do you think you’re up to it?”
I slowly nodded my head, and we headed downstairs together, arm in arm.
The black casket with silver handles sat on one side of the small viewing room in the mortuary. I had requested this first moment to myself. I walked timidly up to the opened portion at the top.
He looked like he was just sleeping, and I reached out to touch him, just to make sure. He was so cold.
His hair had been textured perfectly into place, just the way he liked it, purposely messy. His face still looked just like him. I was going to have to compliment whoever had done his makeup. They had worked well from the photograph I had given them.
He was dressed in the tuxedo he had worn at our wedding just a few short months ago. His wedding ring was still on his finger, as mine was still on my finger.
There was a beautiful spray of red roses that draped the lower end of the casket, with ribbon running through it that said “Beloved Husband & Son” on it.
I had heard someone once say that the spirit never strays far from its body before it is buried, so I decided to speak to him one last time.
“I want to thank you for all the great memories you’ve given me,” I said, and I reached out to touch his hand. “You’re the most wonderful person I’ve ever known. I’ll always keep you right here.” I pointed to where my heart rested in my chest. “I want to hold you to your word. You said you’d wait for me. Please do. It may take a long time for me to get where you are, but I will come. I promise.” I stood there for a few minutes just drinking in the sight of him, knowing it would be my last private moment with him. “I love you,” I added finally, bending over to kiss him softly one last time.
I walked over to the door to let the rest of the family, who were waiting outside, in.
When they were done paying their respects, we stepped out so Krista could have a minute to herself with her son.
She soon reappeared, and two attendants from the funeral home went in to close the casket before they rolled it past us to the waiting hearse.
Once Vance was placed inside, we were ushered to a company limousine, which we rode in while we followed the hearse to the church.
The funeral service turned out to be fairly large. It was filled with a great number of teenagers from Sedona High School and several of their families. The program was short and consisted of a congregational hymn followed by a slightly fabricated version of Vance’s life story. There was a solo performed by a friend of mine who was in the school choir, and she was followed by the minister who gave some remarks on dealing with life and death. Then it was over.
The male members of the coven were the pallbearers. They carried the casket out to the waiting hearse, which then led the processional to the cemetery.
The casket was removed upon arrival and placed into a liner before being set upon the motorized straps that would lower it into the plot. Some chairs and a canopy had been placed over near it. My dad led Krista and me over to them, while Mom, Grandma, Brad, and Shelly followed behind.
Once the crowd was assembled, my friend from the choir sang another hymn, and then the minister said a prayer to dedicate the grave. Afterwards, everyone was dismissed and invited to go back to the church for a luncheon that had been provided by one of the church’s ladies organizations.
I spoke with a few well-wishers before I pulled my dad to the side and told him to go back to the church without me. I wanted to stay here until Vance was lowered into the ground.
He gave me a questioning look and told me to call him on his cell phone when I was ready for him to come get me.
I ducked into an out of the way spot where I could observe things from a distance but not be observed myself. As soon as the cemetery was cleared, a few workers appeared with shovels, as well as a man driving a small tractor.
I saw the belts begin to move, and Vance’s casket was lowered into the ground. My heart began to beat faster when it quickly lowered out of my sight, and I had to resist the urge to run after it.
The men soon had the belts up out of the pit, but nothing could have prepared me for the sound of that first shovel full of dirt hitting the casket liner beneath. I had to cover my mouth to keep from crying out.
I watched as the small tractor moved in and pushed most of the dirt back into the hole. When he had done as much as he could, the other men came in with their shovels to finish up the work. Afterward they placed a small metal marker at the head of the grave.
When they had all left, I made my way out from my hiding place, slowly walking over to where the soft mound rose up from the ground. I sank down to my heels and reached my hand out, placing it in the fresh dirt.
When I removed my hand, there was a perfect print of it left behind, showing that I had been there.
“I love you,” I said one more time, and I closed my eyes in sorrow for a moment, then stood and walked out of the cemetery.
I called my da
d when I reached the gates, and he was there to pick me up shortly. I asked him not to take me to the church but to take me home instead as I could not handle anymore people right now.
He dropped me off at home and went back to the church, since there were still many people in attendance and he had offered to play host to them for me.
I walked into the empty house and went upstairs to my room. I changed out of my black dress and went over to my dresser to find something comfortable to wear. That was where I stumbled onto one of Vance’s t-shirts and a pair of sweats he had left there. I gently, almost reverently, pulled them out of the drawer.
I held them up to my face, trying to find a hint of his smell on them. There was something faintly there. That was when I decided to wear them.
They were much too large for me, but I didn’t care. The shirt sagged to my mid-thigh, and I had to tie the drawstring hard on the sweats to get them tight enough.
I slipped on a pair of my tennis shoes and wandered out into our garage where his massive black motorcycle was parked in one of the bays, next to my little green scooter. His helmet sat in the middle of the seat, on top of one of his leather jackets.
Both of these items did smell like him, and I slipped them on before I opened the garage door.
I climbed onto the bike, lifted the kickstand, and pushed it backward out into the driveway, then out onto the street. I kick-started the engine like I had seen him do so many times. I popped it into gear and took off, roaring down the street.
My body knew exactly where I was going without my mind really having to register what I was doing. I made a right at the highway and headed up into Oak Creek Canyon.
I drove easily, until I came to the small road I was looking for. I turned off, crossed the bridge and parked the motorcycle at the dead end on the other side. I took off the jacket and helmet since it was hot and left them with the bike, then proceeded to hike my way up to the large flat stone that marked our secret place.
The memories flooded over me as soon as I entered into the space. It was like I was watching a movie. I could see the first moonlit night when he had brought me here, when he had told me he believed we were soulmates. I saw the ritual in which he had performed his spell, binding our souls together for eternity. I saw the crisp, fall day when we had taken pictures in the changing leaves, when we had laughed and chased each other through the forest.
It was like he was alive here. I could see his smiling face as if he were standing before me. I could hear him telling me he loved me. I could feel his hugs and kisses. His magic surrounded me, and it was strong.
Flinging my arms out from my body, I twirled around in a circle, letting a smile spread out across my face.
“I love you!” I shouted while I spun around.
“I love you! I love you! I love you!” echoed back at me off the canyon walls.
After I had twirled until I was too dizzy to stand up, I sank down to the ground. I just sat there and let all the images I had of him wash over me.
I stayed that way, unmoving, until the sun had sunk low behind the hills and the night sky began to take its place.
I decided I had better go home before everyone became too worried about me. But I knew I would return tomorrow to visit the ghosts of my past again.
When I walked back into the kitchen from the garage, it was to a whole host of worried faces.
“Sorry,” I said a little sheepishly. “I needed to get out for a while.”
“Are you sure you’re okay?” my mom asked, taking in my oddly dressed appearance.
“Vance left these in my drawer,” I explained, and I ran my hand down the relaxed material.
“Where did you go?” Krista asked me casually.
I smiled at the memory. “Vance had a special place he liked to go to in Oak Creek Canyon. He used to take me there with him after we got together. When I went there today it was like he was alive again. His magic is strong there. I could see all the things we had done there together, as if I were watching a movie. I didn’t want to leave.”
“You seem happier,” she commented, watching me.
“I was happy while I was there. Would you like to go see it?” I asked. “I don’t know if it will affect you the same way, but it was a place that he loved.”
“I would like that very much, thank you.” Krista smiled at me.
“Come with me upstairs,” I replied, and I gestured toward my room. “I have something else to show you.”
She followed me up the stairs and into my bedroom where I pulled out the packet of pictures Vance and I had taken together.
“We took these in the canyon one day last fall. It was one of the best days in my life,” I explained, and I handed them to her.
Krista took the pictures from me, slowly going over each one until she came to the one which was my favorite, where Vance was staring straight at me with that loving look in his eyes.
“He loved you a lot, didn’t he?” she asked softly.
“Yes, he did,” I replied, and the tears welled up in my eyes. “Those are the only pictures I have of him.” Suddenly a thought popped into my head. “I’ll be right back,” I added, and I hurried out my bedroom door.
I ran down the stairs looking for my mom until I found her in the family room.
“Mom, did you ever get my wedding pictures from the photographer in Las Vegas?” I asked.
She gave me a sad look, and she nodded.
“I did, but I didn’t think you’d be up to looking at them so soon,” she said with a slight frown.
“Can I have them now, please? I really want to show Krista the wedding,” I explained.
My mom stood up, walked over to one of the bookshelves, and pulled a large manila envelope off, handing it to me.
“Here you go,” she said.
“Thanks, Mom.” I smiled and ran back up into my bedroom.
Krista was still looking at the pictures on my bed.
“These are our wedding pictures!” I said, holding up the large envelope. “I haven’t ever seen them before. Would you like to look at them with me?”
I opened the envelope with nervous fingers and dumped the contents out into the middle of my bed. My breath caught in my throat when I saw the many captured images tumbling onto the surface in front of me.
There he was … my Vance. The photographer had captured the look on his face when he had first seen me coming toward him down the aisle. The very moment I had laid my eyes on him and he had stolen my breath away.
“There are so many!” I exclaimed with joy. “It’s as if she captured every second of our wedding!”
The tears slid down my face, and I picked up each copy, carefully examining it like it was a priceless diamond.
“You look so beautiful in your dress.” Krista smiled while she looked over them with me.
“Thank you,” I replied, unable to look at myself since there were so many images of Vance.
“This is wonderful of you to share these with me. It’s almost as if I was there with you,” she said, holding up one image in particular. “Have you ever seen a boy more in love than this?” she asked laughing.
“No, not ever!” I smiled back. “I think that one is going to be my favorite of him! I can’t wait to show him these!”
The words slipped from my mouth before I realized what I had said, and I saw Krista visibly flinch.
“Oh! I … I …,” I stammered unable to think of the words I needed to say to cover my horrible blunder.
I ran out the room, down the stairs and into the garage. Tears were streaming down my face. I pushed the door opener on my way past, hopped on the motorcycle and pushed it out onto the carport.
I jump-started the engine and took off down the road into the dark night. I didn’t really know where I was going this time until I turned off on the cemetery road. Once I arrived inside the gates I turned the bike off and strode out across the grounds toward Vance’s grave. I needed to just be near him.
The way was
lit dimly by the moon, and I noticed as I approached Vance’s grave that he already had another visitor, which surprised me.
“Hello?” I called out to the person in the shadows, not wishing to alarm them with my late-night arrival.
The figure didn’t move, and I began to wonder if my eyes were playing tricks on me.
“Hello?” I called out again. “Who’s there?”
The figure did turn this time, stepping from the shadows, into the moonlight.
My blood froze.
“Vance?” I said hoarsely, recognizing him instantly along with the tuxedo he had been buried in.
My eyes darted quickly over to the grave next to him, and I could see that the earth had been moved and there was now a slight depression into the ground.
“Vance!” I called out, running full speed to throw my arms around him, crushing him to me in a desperate grip.
He was covered in dirt, but I didn’t care, and I kissed him full on the mouth, tangling my hands into his hair.
“You’re alive! You’re alive!” I said hugging him, and tears of joy began streaming down my face.
He reached up then to grab hold of both of my arms, pulling them away from him so he could step back and look at me.
“Who are you?” he said roughly.
###
About the Author:
Lacey Weatherford resides in the beautiful White Mountains of Arizona, where she lives with her family. When she’s not out supporting her children at multiple sporting/music events, she continues to love writing, reading, reviewing, and blogging. To learn more about this series, or to contact Lacey, you can visit the official website at http://www.ofwitchesandwarlocks.com or http://twitter.com/LMWeatherford.
The Of Witches and Warlocks series
The Trouble With Spells
The Demon Kiss
Blood Of The White Witch
Lacey Weatherford, The Trouble With Spells