“I didn’t! She’s a goblin. They’re never nice.”
“Have you ever met a female goblin before?” Cory asked him.
“Never,” Macks said. “And I don’t know anyone who has. Until now, I guess.”
Resigned to going to the party and buying a gift to take, Cory asked Macks to get ready, then went to her room to look for a disguise. When she couldn’t find anything better, she twisted her hair into a bun and put on a pair of dark glasses. “I hope this is enough,” she said, checking herself in a mirror.
She was on her way out the door when she thought about the goblin woman. “She’s the kind of person that grumpy goblin Officer Deeds should marry,” she murmured to herself.
Cory was picturing the goblin officer when another face popped into her head. Normally this meant that her Cupid abilities were working and the second person was the first one’s true love. Cory gasped, hoping this wasn’t true. The second person was her mother, Delphinium.
Cory had matched up a number of couples. Some were her friends and some were strangers. Some she was happy to match, while she wasn’t so sure about others. Cory had really struggled with whether or not she should match Goldilocks with the already engaged Prince Rupert. She had decided to follow her Cupid instincts only after she saw how right they were for each other. But she couldn’t imagine matching her mother with that horrible goblin officer! She’d met Officer Deeds only a few times; he always seemed to enjoy being nasty. Cory and her mother hadn’t gotten along for ages and it had only gotten worse after Cory quit the Tooth Fairy Guild. The last time she saw Delphinium, her mother had disowned her, which had been a relief for Cory. It meant that her mother no longer stopped by to berate her. True, her mother and Deeds were both unpleasant people, but wouldn’t they get worse if they were together? The thought of matching them up made Cory shudder. “I am not going to do that!” she muttered.
Cory didn’t realize that she had said it out loud until Macks said, “Do what?”
“Oh, nothing,” she replied.
Very few people knew that Cory was a Cupid. Her grandfather Lionel was one as well, and he had told her that her job would be much easier if people didn’t know. The only other people who knew were those she really trusted, like Blue, her uncle Micah, and the putti who worked for her grandfather. Her friend Marjorie Muffet knew because Cory had told her before Lionel suggested that it should be a secret, but Marjorie didn’t believe her. Cory didn’t know Macks well enough to tell him, which meant that she’d have to be more careful when he was around.
“Are you ready to go?” asked Macks.
Cory slung her purse over her shoulder. “I suppose it would be too much to ask if we could try to be inconspicuous?”
“Huh?” said Macks.
“Never mind,” she said, wishing they didn’t have to go anywhere.
Instead of heading for one of the big markets, Cory had Macks take her to a street not far from Perfect Pastry. While visiting the pastry shop once, she had noticed a home furnishings store nearby. Before she even entered the store, she had a good idea what she wanted.
Cory didn’t know a lot about the three little pigs, but she did know that they liked to wallow in the oversize bathtub in the back of their cave. She’d also heard that they had already filled it with mud. When she entered the shop, she headed straight for the clocks. It was easy enough to lose track of time when one took a bath. Cory thought it would be even easier for a pig who was lying in a tub of mud.
Cory was looking at a fancy clock showing the four seasons when a salesman approached her. “May I help you?” he asked.
“Yes, please,” said Cory. “I’m looking for a clock that will hold up to moisture and mud.”
“Ah!” said the salesman, and he turned to face the clocks. “I’m sure I have the right clock for you.” The first clock he showed her was very beautiful. “The face of this clock is made from crystal from Mount Elva. The clock can announce the correct time out loud in any of the fey languages. The owner need only choose. It is impervious to any liquid, including the stomach acid of a roc.”
“I don’t think . . . ,” Cory began.
“This clock tells the time in every fey city,” he said, gesturing to the next clock over. Dozens of tiny clocks ringed the large clock in the center. “It can withstand the pressure of the deep sea, and would be an excellent gift for a mermaid.”
“It’s not for a mermaid,” Cory told him.
“Well, then, you might prefer this beauty,” he said, walking her to a clock on a pedestal by itself. “It tells the time in the human and fey worlds simultaneously, which is no mean feat considering that the rate that time passes in the two worlds often varies. We’ve been in a most unusual period where the two times coincide, but that won’t last for long, I assure you. When it begins fluctuating again, this clock will be extremely useful for those who pass between the worlds. It is also impervious to anything, including lava. I’d have to say that this is the most extraordinary clock in the store.”
Macks whistled, long and low. “And the most expensive,” he said, eyeing the price tag.
“The elves made this clock, so of course it’s infused with their magic,” the salesman said, sounding as if he’d been personally offended. “The price reflects that, too, of course.”
“Don’t you have anything simpler and less expensive?” Cory asked.
“Oh, you want to go in that direction!” the salesman said, his gaze turning scornful. “Over here, we have a waterproof clock that tells the time. I think it’s boring and unattractive, but if that’s what you want . . .”
“I’ll take it!” Cory told him. It was an ordinary clock without any fancy, unnecessary flourishes, which was all the pigs needed.
“Then I’ll get it wrapped for you,” the salesman told her, his look saying that Cory was just as boring and unattractive as the clock.
This delighted Cory, because it meant that the salesman hadn’t recognized her. Apparently, the bun and dark glasses had worked!
Cory was quite pleased with her purchase when they left the store. While she waited for Macks to put the clock in the cycle compartment, she noticed that no one walking past spared her a second glance. She was in a good mood when they climbed onto the ogre’s solar cycle and started down the road. But then she saw a sign posted on a streetlamp.
Cory Feathering hates fairies!
“That’s not true!” she said as they sped past. “I’m half fairy myself!”
The next sign was worse.
Stop Cory Feathering before she destroys the guilds.
“But that’s not at all—”
And then she saw that all the streetlamps bore signs, and they were all about her.
The guilds are on your side. Cory Feathering isn’t!
Say yes to guilds! Say no to Cory Feathering!
The guilds have rights, too! Stop Cory Feathering.
By the time Macks turned off the main road and headed toward Micah’s house, Cory was close to tears.
CHAPTER
6
Cory and Macks spent a quiet afternoon inside. Cory read a book, then took a nap, thinking that maybe she was feeling so low because she was tired. Macks left when Blue showed up, and for once the ogre seemed relieved to go.
It was early evening when Cory and Blue left the house on their way to the three little pigs’ cave. There was a slight chill to the air, a reminder that autumn was about to arrive. When they reached the cave, Blue parked his solar cycle halfway down the path that concealed the cave door from the road. They didn’t hear a sound from inside the cave until Alphonse opened the door, and then music and laughter poured out, welcoming them to the party.
“I’m glad you could make it!” Alphonse shouted over the noise. “Come on in. I believe you know just about everybody.”
“We brought you a housewarming gift. Where should we put it?” Cory said, holding up the wrapped clock.
“Thank you!” said Alphonse, looking very pleased.
“I’ll put it on the gift table with the others.”
From the noise coming out of the main room, Cory expected a big crowd, but there really weren’t that many people. Olot and Chancy were sitting in the middle of the room with everyone gathered around listening to the ogre strum his lute. Cory’s neighbor the witch Wanita, had brought her pet boar, Boris, who was happily eating from a big bowl placed on the floor. Alphonse’s two brothers, Roger and Bertie, were offering trays laden down with drinks. Cory was surprised to see that her grandfather Lionel was there talking to a female pig in a pretty silk dress.
“We asked Olot to bring his lute,” Alphonse told Cory. “He’s very good, isn’t he?”
“Yes, he is,” Cory said, smiling. She had always enjoyed Olot’s solos and was happy to hear him play again. It seemed to make him happy, too, because he had his eyes closed and was wearing a faint smile as he played. Cory hoped this meant that he was no longer upset about what had happened at the Shady Nook. But then he looked up and saw Cory and his smile faded.
Cory was talking to Alphonse and Blue when Olot finished the song. Excusing himself from the people around him, he headed over to Cory.
She stepped aside, hoping to keep their conversation private. “I wanted to talk to you after what happened last night,” said Olot. “You were there when Jack Horner told me that he didn’t want us playing at his restaurants anymore. Apparently, no other restaurant owners do, either. I got messages today from all of them. They don’t want us back until the trial is over.”
“I’m so sorry,” Cory told him. “I wanted to talk to you about that, too. I’ve been thinking, and I’ve decided that I should quit Zephyr, at least for now. It’s my fault that the guilds did those things last night. If I weren’t part of the band, none of that would have happened.”
Olot looked horrified. “You can’t mean it! Zephyr needs you, Cory! No one wants you to leave. Not only are you the best drummer around, but our songs have been so much better ever since you started helping us write them. You’re an important part of the band! You don’t really want to leave, do you?”
Cory shook her head. “Not at all, but you shouldn’t have to deal with this.”
“And neither should you,” said Olot. “We’ll stand by you just as we know you’d stand by us. Zephyr isn’t just the instruments or the music. The people in it are equally important. I do have some good news, though. We have one booking. My third cousin, four times removed, wants Zephyr to play at his birthday party. He sent me a message this morning. We’re playing for him three days from today. He’s very excited.”
“Was it Itchy Butt?” asked Cory. “He told me he wanted Zephyr to play for him.”
Olot nodded. “Itchy Butt told me that he knows other family members who are interested, too. So even if we won’t be playing in restaurants, we’re still going to get some gigs.”
“That’s wonderful!” said Cory. “It’s the best news I’ve heard in a while.”
A bell rang, drawing everyone’s attention to Alphonse. “Dinner is ready! We’re having a buffet, so please get in line and help yourselves.”
“Is everything all right?” Blue asked Cory as they got behind Wanita.
Cory nodded. “Better than I thought.”
“Isn’t this a nice party?” Wanita said to them. “Boris, stop chewing on that chair! I’ll get you more food in just a minute. People will think you’ve never been to a party before!”
The boar grunted and started snuffling at a sofa cushion.
“Actually, the only parties he’s ever attended were the ones my sister witches put on and they had their pets there, too. He’s never been to a pig party before, but then neither have I. What do you suppose they’re serving?” She leaned forward, trying to see around Olot and Chancy. “It looks like a lot of corn dishes. Good, Boris will like that!”
Wanita was right. When it was their turn to serve themselves, Cory saw that everything was corn related. The first platter held corn on the cob. After that she saw corn dogs, corn bread, corn pudding, and corn chowder. Cory wondered how they were going to work the drinks into the corn menu and was relieved to find apple cider.
Carrying plates piled high with food, Cory and Blue found some small, round chairs shaped like apples grouped together in a corner. A few minutes later Lionel joined them, taking the third chair. Cory giggled when she saw the refined gentleman sitting on a giant apple with his plate balanced on his lap.
He gave her a wry smile when he saw that she was laughing. “I wasn’t sure what to expect when I accepted the pigs’ invitation, but it wasn’t this. I met them at your party. I must admit that I never expected to see them again.”
“They’re very nice, especially Alphonse,” said Cory. “I have to say, they’ve done a lovely job with the cave.”
“I like the walls,” said Blue.
“The stripes are very nice,” agreed Cory’s grandfather. “Are they natural?”
Cory nodded. “I saw the cave before the pigs moved in. The stripes are layers of different kinds of rock. I like the way the pigs picked up the colors in their furnishings. It’s a big cave, but they’ve made it look cozy and inviting.”
“That reminds me of a proposal I have for you,” said Lionel. “As you know, my house is very large, certainly too large for just one person. I was wondering if you’d like to move in with me. You could have the pick of the spare bedrooms and there’s plenty of room behind the house for your woodchucks. You’d be doing an old man a big favor. It would be nice to have company so I’m not rattling around in the house by myself. ”
“But the putti live there, don’t they? You aren’t really alone,” said Cory.
“That’s true, but as wonderful as they are, it just isn’t the same as having a real member of my family in the house. And just think, Blue and the other bodyguards wouldn’t have to sleep on the floor in the main room.”
“I must admit, that is a wonderful invitation and very tempting, but I’m happy where I am,” said Cory. “Uncle Micah and I have a comfortable relationship, and I don’t want to desert him.”
“I can understand that,” said her grandfather, “but will you at least give my offer some consideration?”
“Of course!” said Cory. “I promise.”
When they’d finished eating, Blue and Cory wandered around, talking to everyone at the party and enjoying Olot’s music when the pigs convinced him to play again. The pigs gave everyone a tour of the cave after that, including the huge bathing room and the shallow pool filled with liquid mud. When they returned to the main room, there was cake to eat and presents for the pigs to open. The three little pigs loved the clock that Cory had picked out, and the candlesticks that Lionel had brought. Olot and Chancy had given them a vegetable steamer, which the pigs vowed to use the very next day. Petal, the female pig, had given them dish towels and an apron. Cory had figured out that Petal was Alphonse’s girlfriend, so she wasn’t surprised when she heard Petal say that part of her gift was to come over and make the three pigs supper one night soon.
“That’s good,” declared Roger. “That apron won’t fit any of us. The only one it will fit is you, Petal.”
The little sow smiled and flushed bright pink. Cory guessed that Petal really had bought it for herself.
When the three brothers unwrapped the gift from Wanita, they couldn’t help showing their disappointment. “Oh, it’s a candle,” said Alphonse. “How very nice.”
“It’s not just a candle,” said Wanita. “I made it myself. You light it in one room and all the insects in your house will leave. I have one just like it at home. I started using mine over the summer when Boris got extra stinky and attracted lots of flies. I put magic in it, you know.”
“The candle should be very useful,” said Alphonse, although he looked a little doubtful. “Thank you all for your marvelous gifts. They’ll make our house even more special.”
Everyone admired the gifts for a time, but it wasn’t long before Blue said to Cory, “Are yo
u ready to go?”
“Getting bored, huh?” Cory whispered.
“You know it,” said Blue. “But that’s not all. You’re going to have a very busy day tomorrow. You might want to get to bed earlier than usual.”
“We’re going to head home, too,” said Olot when he saw Chancy yawning.
After saying good-bye to everyone, the two couples left the cave together. Olot and Chancy took a shortcut to their own cave, while Cory and Blue started down the main path, looking for Blue’s solar cycle. Blue was getting the helmets out of the compartment when a sound overhead made them both look up. Dozens of tiny fairies were flying above them, their frantically beating wings creating a flickering light. They were carrying the bags that tooth fairies used to carry the teeth they collected. From what Cory could see, the bags were heavy enough to be full.
Blue started to call out just as the fairies dumped the contents of their bags. Diseased teeth from every race and species showered down on Cory and Blue. Familiar with teeth, Cory knew what they were right away, and shrieked in anger and surprise. She wrapped her arms around her head to protect her face.
“What are these things?” Blue roared, pulling his shirt over his head to cover it.
“Bad teeth,” said Cory. “I’d know that awful smell anywhere!”
“What’s wrong?” Olot bellowed, running back down the shortcut. “Is someone hurt?”
“No,” Cory said as the fairies flew off. “Just mad. Did you see the bags they were carrying? Once a tooth fairy gets a bag for the teeth they collect, they never loan them or give them to anyone. There’s no doubt about it. Those were tooth fairies. Yuck! I hate the smell of rotting teeth!”
“What they did wasn’t nice, but at least no one was hurt,” said Olot.
“They weren’t trying to hurt us, just show me how much they hate me,” said Cory. “They had to take off from work to do this, and now they’ll have to go home and wash those tooth bags. The fact that they touched those teeth at all says a lot. Tooth fairies hate rotting teeth and don’t want anything to do with them. As far as they’re concerned, dumping those teeth on us was the ultimate insult.”