Finally, I spotted what I needed. In two swift moves, I picked up a rock. It felt heavy in my hand, much more weighted than it should have, the only indication of how truly terrified I’d become. I could deny my fears like a champ if I needed to, but this time my body didn’t want to let me off the hook of self-awareness. Maybe it came with age. Lately, I’d wondered if I could call myself the oldest seventeen-year-old alive.
The bushes moved slightly and a face I dearly loved but had hoped never to see again appeared in the clearing. He couldn’t see me; I knew for sure I’d blocked myself from view. I’d hidden enough in my life to tell when I was about to get caught. This didn’t feel like one of those moments.
I considered myself lucky because if Deacon had made eye contact with me, I might be lost. I wiped tears away from my eyes and still I couldn’t make myself move away from the pain that being this close to Deacon caused me. So close and yet still a universe away from me.
The last time I’d seen Deacon, I’d kissed him, knowing the moment meant good-bye. During the whole event of my leaving, only six months earlier—although it seemed like a lifetime had passed since then—I’d known if I stayed in Genesis, Deacon and I would become a couple.
I’d fallen in love with him. Sort of. With Deacon, everything proved to be complicated. I knew I loved him as a friend. Maybe if we’d had more time, I could have adjusted the feelings starting within me. And six months had done nothing to temper those thoughts. Except now he wouldn’t know me if I fell on him. I’d been erased from his memory.
I had one more moment to dwell on the fact I’d come so close to Deacon when a second person I’d once adored appeared. Chad Lyons. I’d traded myself for his existence. Well, technically, the Chad I looked at wasn’t the Chad of my past. Instead, he happened to be a cloned version of my old boyfriend, and I’d basically given up everything I’d ever believed in to bring him back to life.
“See anything?” Stepping out from behind Chad appeared his younger brother, Micah. Once upon a time, he’d been my fighting partner.
“Nope.” Deacon turned around, stretching his hands over his head.
“I told you we were not going to find anything. Daytime hunts are pointless.” Chad pulled a map out of his bag and opened it. After a moment he spoke again. “The Vamps are sleeping and the Werewolves, they’re too smart to get caught in the middle of the day.”
Micah shrugged. “We can’t be too careful. I’m tired of the dogs getting the jump on us every night.”
Yep. Micah’s words gave me fortitude. I needed to eliminate Jason as a problem in their lives. I’d all but betrayed Genesis to bring Chad back. The least I could do was to get rid of some of their issues for them.
But first, I had to get them away from the unconscious wolves so I could do what I’d set out to accomplish. I jumped up, chucking the rock over my head as I did. It flew to the right of Deacon, striking the tree behind where the three of them stood.
Deacon whirled around. “What the hell?”
I took off running, knowing they would chase. The sad truth? They’d not be able to control themselves. One thing I’d learned from my months in Redemption was the conditioning Icahn had given us was thorough. We were downright predictable in our responses to stimuli.
I could hear them behind me, and I have to admit it felt really good to be sprinting like this again. I’d had no reason to, other than my self-imposed drills, since I’d left Genesis.
Also, I couldn’t help—even as the breath pumped out of my lungs and I nearly tripped on a branch beneath my feet—but feel a certain kind of deranged thrill at the fact I could outwit the three guys who chased me. In one day, I’d bested Jason and managed to lead three of Genesis’s top Warriors on a chase they hadn’t seen coming.
As I tore through the overgrowth of the spring-filled forest, I would periodically catch bits and pieces of what they shouted at each other. Once upon a time, I would have been with them. Now, I had to still my aching heart. It wanted me to turn around and beg them to remember. To remember me.
I finally saw the outline of trees I’d searched for. When I’d been a Warrior with Genesis, this had been one of my spots. I could climb the trees in one easy motion and give myself a hiding place from which to make my assault. In this case, I didn’t want to hurt anyone. I wanted them not to be able to find me. If I lucked out, when Icahn wiped their memory of me, he’d also taken away all the knowledge I’d brought to the battles with me.
The branch I needed hung low, and I jumped into the air to grab on to it. I’d almost made contact when I got tackled from behind. My body slammed into the ground with such a force it knocked the wind from my lungs.
Instinct alone had me rolling over onto my back.
I wasn’t a Werewolf but I knew who had caught me by scent alone, before I even saw him. I’d never forget it. Somehow, I’d come to associate the slight whiff of mint found in his homemade soap and the charcoal he used to sharpen his stakes, as pure Deacon scents.
“Damn it.” I crab-walked backward, lunging to my feet. I still hadn’t caught my breath and my chest felt like a brick had landed on it.
Deacon jumped up, barely winded. He raised an eyebrow before pulling his machete off his back. “Now. What do we have here?”
I stared at his weapon. Did he plan to use it to chop off my head? Unless things had seriously changed—and I supposed they could have—Genesis didn’t kill human beings, only monsters. I swallowed through my dry throat as dread filled my soul. My own machete remained where I’d dropped it. By Jason.
Dumb. Dumb. Dumb.
“I’m not a Werewolf.”
Deacon cocked his head to the side. “Just what a beastie would say.”
I rolled my eyes. Breath had returned to my body, giving me more gumption. “Oh please. We both know you’re fully aware I’m not a monster. I don’t set off any of your internal alarms.”
The curious gaze left Deacon’s dark eyes, replaced by a wariness I knew too well. My head swam. What had I done to make him think I posed a threat? Even when he’d taken off his machete, he hadn’t seemed poised to strike. Now? He might really remove my cranium from the rest of my body.
If I didn’t undo whatever I’d done, really quickly.
“How would you know what I can and cannot sense?”
Oh no. Why couldn’t I learn to keep my big mouth shut? I blew out a long breath. I knew why. My sudden, stupid answer had given Deacon reason to suspect I was dangerous had happened because rather than thinking things through clearly, I’d been distracted by watching his brown hair fall slightly over his eyes. He’d pushed it away with his forefinger. The movement had made me want to melt into a puddle of goo.
For the brief second, I’d become the kind of girl I couldn’t deal with and lost my focus.
“Are you going to answer me?”
I held his gaze, forcing myself not to notice he looked tired. “Yes.”
He waited a moment before he spoke again. “Well?”
“Everyone knows about Warriors, at least everyone from where I’m from.”
“Really?” Deacon shifted his weight from one foot to the other. I watched the movement. I’d not seen him do it before. Had he injured himself? When he’d tackled me, or earlier? “Where are you from? We don’t run into strangers around here. There’s something about you—”
He didn’t get to finish what he would have said. Chad and Micah plowed through the clearing, nearly colliding with each other as they did.
Micah called over his shoulder. “I’ve found them, Glen.”
Glen. Tia, my longtime best friend, until she’d gone off the deep end her first night fighting, had married him after she’d gotten pregnant, on purpose, to quit having to fight the monsters. Were they still married? And what had happened to their son? How had his presence been rewritten in this new reality?
Chad’s eyes roamed my body, and I shivered. He assessed me as a threat, not as the girl he’d once loved so much he’d sworn he wante
d to marry some day. “Who is she, Deacon?”
Deacon didn’t turn to look at Chad. “I’m finding out, Lyons. Why don’t you and the boy wonder over there let me do my job?”
The boy wonder? Deacon made Batman references? Apparently, Icahn had given him cultural awareness when he’d messed with his brain. Deacon had grown up below ground serving the Vampires. He didn’t understand the phrases we’d used when we talked about television or movies. Of course, now I could come up a whole slew of pop-cultural references none of them would get, since I could actually remember stuff and they couldn’t.
Some things never changed. Apparently Deacon and Chad still couldn’t stand one another. And this time, at least, I knew it had nothing to do with me.
“She knows about Warrior senses.” Deacon took a step toward me. His back stayed straight and rigid while his arms tensed like he might be getting ready to swing his machete at my head.
“Look.” I couldn’t play victim with these guys. They might not know me but the Rachel Clancy who still held the fake memories Icahn had stuck in my head had known most of them her entire life. Not to mention, Deacon, the guy I thought about late at night in my bed, would be dead if I hadn’t rescued his sorry behind from a Vampire cage. “I don’t want to hurt you. Why don’t you put down your machete and we’ll talk like people?”
“You think you can hurt me, little girl? Are you out of your mind?”
Realistically, I couldn’t get out of this situation unharmed. There were three of them and one of me. With Glen on the way, their number would become four. I might be able to take down four Vampires on my own, if I had enough stakes and some really good luck, but I couldn’t beat up four Warrior men. Not without risking some serious harm to the soft, vulnerable spots on my body.
The trick, I really hoped, in this kind of circumstance, had to be convincing them they didn’t want to harm me while also giving them the impression I might be dangerous if they didn’t give me a wide-enough zone. Then, maybe, I could get away.
Seconds earlier, Deacon had shown me his knees hurt. As much as I hated to cause him one ounce of harm, I didn’t see how I had any choice in the matter.
I’m sorry, Deacon.
He couldn’t read my mind, unfortunately, so he’d never know the pain it caused me to inflict discomfort. In reality, it wouldn’t be the worst miscommunication we’d ever had, considering he’d never understand why I had Icahn rewrite his memories and mess with his mind. He wouldn’t know why I couldn’t have tolerated his interference in my plans, why I had to, for once, do something on my own terms. His wanting to protect me would have made it impossible for me to accomplish my goals.
With a quick roundhouse kick, I made contact with his left kneecap. He gasped and fell backward a step. I lunged forward and grabbed the machete out his hands before I took three steps in the opposite direction from where he fell.
I handed the machete to Chad, whose dark eyes were so huge, they looked like they might explode from his face.
“Take this. I don’t want to hurt anyone.”
Deacon jumped to his feet, wincing like the movement pained him. “You don’t seem like much of a pacifist to me.”
“I wanted you to understand I could hurt you.” Chad took the machete from my hands. “Even though I don’t want to.”
Whatever Deacon would have said, Chad interrupted by speaking over him. “You’re trained in fighting skills and you know who we are.”
“Everyone knows who the Warriors are.”
Whatever lie I made up now had to be good. They had to believe it and then they needed to let me go.
“Who’s everyone?” Micah spoke for the first time. He’d been my partner in crime when we’d attacked the Vampire facilities. His voice sliced at my conscience, making my skin erupt in goose bumps.
“I live among a tribe of people who don’t exist below ground like you do. We know about you because, of course, we’ve watched you for years. Haven’t you ever wondered if you weren’t alone in the world?”
They used to and unless Icahn had altered their curiosity when he rewrote their brains, my words should at least intrigue them.
Chad took a step toward me. “Where is your tribe?”
“Dead.”
I kicked some dirt beneath my feet. No one understood grief better than I did. The emotion had led me to this place; the need to bring Chad back to life had driven me to a place where I’d been willing to trade everything for a chance at redemption, for the opportunity to see him again. But I’d never been much of an actress, and I didn’t know if I could adequately show the facade now.
“I tracked the Wolf pack who killed them and I ended them. Why don’t you let me go now and I’ll never bother you again?”
“I’m afraid we can’t.” Chad shook his head as he held out his hand. “We need to take you to our people and let our leader decide what should be done with you.”
Did he want me to hold his outstretched fingers? The desire to do so warred with my survival instincts, making my mouth clench with indecision. Icahn would never let me live if I showed up at Genesis.
“I can’t come with you.”
Micah stepped next to Chad. “You don’t have a choice.”
I never had a chance to respond. With a suddenness I hadn’t given him credit for, Deacon picked up a fallen stick and whacked me over the head. I stumbled, grabbing my poor, abused noggin before I slammed into Chad. Fortunately, he caught me as the world spun.
“You’re not the only one who likes to show off their fighting skills.”
God, Deacon could really be a jerk.
Chapter Four
My head had stopped swimming about ten minutes earlier, and I still hadn’t let anyone know I felt better. Why? Well, because it felt really nice, really normal to be carried in Chad’s arms. He was a clone, alive only because I’d bargained for his existence with my soul, but he smelled like the Chad Lyons I had loved: my best friend, my champion, and the greatest person I’d ever known.
While he’d been dead, I fallen in and out of love with Jason and begun a fascination with Deacon. The world spun better for me with Chad in it, and for just a moment, I could pretend everything hadn’t been destroyed; I still could be the girl I’d been before Chad had been killed.
“Are you feeling any better, miss?”
I hadn’t told them my name. Chad’s beautiful manners made him speak to me politely.
“Why are you treating her like she’s some sort of honored guest?” Deacon grumbled from behind me.
I could have turned to look at him, but doing so would have given away the fact I felt better. Injured kept me safer. For now.
“Why did you whack a girl over the head?” Chad countered.
In the tone he used, I could practically hear his eyes rolling.
“She kicked me in the knee.” Deacon’s voice sounded more like a growl I’d have expected from Jason.
The thought made me shudder inside. Did he still lay unconscious on the forest floor? I’d expected to be back to retrieve him by now. I’d wanted him dead by dinnertime. The longer he remained there, the more likely he’d wake up and escape me.
Of course, one word to these guys and I could probably make his death happen…except they’d never let me do the slaughtering myself.
“You threatened her with a machete.” Micah, who had always loved to point out the obvious, added to the conversation.
“She’s an unknown threat. She threw a rock at my head. She led us on a chase most Werewolves wouldn’t be able to accomplish. Excuse me for trying to protect us.” Deacon stormed up to where Micah walked next to me. I could see the outline of his arm, the brown of his shirtsleeve swooshing as he moved.
“Miss?” I’d not answered Chad earlier and he hadn’t, apparently, given up on talking to me. “Why did you throw a rock at Deacon?”
What should I say? I couldn’t very well reply it was to make them move away from my ex-boyfriend and his Wolf pack.
“
Thanks for telling her my name,” Deacon shouted.
“Chill out, dude.” Micah sighed loudly. “Why don’t you just wake the whole forest with your temper?”
“I could hear you for miles.” Glen ran up, finally joining the group. He’d always been a step behind. Talented, but late. “Who is this?”
“We have no idea, but Chad is carrying her around like she’s some kind of princess.”
“We’re taking her back to Genesis so Icahn and the Council can decide what to do with her. I’m carrying her because Deacon knocked her in the head and made it impossible for her to walk.”
Princess, huh? All right, I’d go with it. “I threw the rock at your head because I was afraid of you.”
“You are awful scary to look at it.” Glen snickered like he’d made the best joke ever.
This trip proved to be the worst kind of torture. Everything about them seemed exactly the same, except I no longer existed in their lives. Didn’t they somewhere, somehow in each of their psyches, feel the ache for me I felt for them? I didn’t even mean the way Chad and Deacon had felt for me romantically? I’d never understood why they did anyway. They were so much better than me, superior human beings who didn’t exist in this middle ground of moral ambiguity. I couldn’t help but wish that even beyond romance, Micah and Glen would feel the lack of my friendship from their lives.
Or maybe I’d just become the worst kind of narcissist.
“You were afraid. Didn’t you eliminate an entire Wolf pack who killed the people in your—what—tribe? You took me down like you’d been doing it your whole life. You were afraid? So you threw a rock at my head?”
Deacon wasn’t going to let this go. I couldn’t be surprised. It had never been in his nature to give up on anything. Luckily for me, we had arrived at the entrance to Genesis.
“Now, miss, we’ve arrived at our location.”
Chad still hadn’t asked me my name. I knew how smart the Lyons family was—I knew it not only from my time with them at Genesis but also from my run-ins with them in our past life, not that they would remember. There was no way Chad would let me get away without telling him my name. Right now, this entire act, down to the manners his mother had instilled in him since birth, had to be a calculated move on the part of a very talented fighter to get on my good side.