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  CHAPTER SIXTEEN.

  THE ARCTIC THEATRE ENLARGED UPON--GREAT SUCCESS OF THE FIRST PLAY--THEESQUIMAUX SUBMIT AND BECOME FAST FRIENDS.

  The 1st of December was a great day on board the _Dolphin_, for on thatday it was announced to the crew that "The Arctic Theatre" would beopened, under the able management of Mr F. Ellice, with the play of"Blunderbore; or, The Arctic Giant". The bill, of which two copies wereissued gratis to the crew, announced that the celebrated Peter Grim,Esquire, who had so long trodden the boards of the _Dolphin_ withunparalleled success, had kindly consented to appear in the character of_Blunderbore_ for one winter only. The other parts were asfollows:--_Whackinta_, a beautiful Esquimaux widow, who had beencaptured by two Polar bears, both of which were deeply in love with her,by Frederick Ellice, Esquire. _First Bear_, a big one, by TerenceO'Riley, Esquire. _Second Bear_, a little one, by David Summers,Esquire. _Ben Bolt_, a brave British seaman, who had been wrecked inBlunderbore's desolate dominions, all the crew having perished excepthimself, by John Buzzby, Esquire. These constituted the variouscharacters of the piece, the name of which had been kept a profoundsecret from the crew, until the morning of the day, on which it wasacted.

  Fred's duties as manager and author upon this occasion were by no meanslight, for his troop, being unaccustomed to study, found the utmostdifficulty in committing the simplest sentences to memory. O'Rileyturned out to be the sharpest among them, but having agreed toimpersonate the First Bear, and having to act his part in dumb show--bears not being supposed capable of speech--his powers of memory had notto be exerted. Grim was also pretty good, but Davie Summers could notbe got to remember even the general arrangements of the piece; and asfor Buzzby, he no sooner mastered a line than he forgot the one beforeit, and almost gave it up in despair; but by dint of much study and manyrehearsals in secret, under the superintendence of Fred and TomSingleton, who undertook to assist, they succeeded at last in goingthrough with it, with only a few mistakes.

  On the morning of the 1st December, while the most of the crew were awayat Red Snow Valley cutting moss, Fred collected his _Corps Dramatique_for a last rehearsal in the forecastle, where they were secure frominterruption, the place being so cold that no one would willingly gointo it except under the force of necessity. A dim lantern lit up theapartment faintly.

  "We must do it without a mistake this time," said Fred Ellice, openinghis book and calling upon Grim to begin.

  "'Tis cold," began Grim.

  "Stop, you're wrong."

  "Oh, so I am!" cried Grim, slapping his thigh; "I'll begin again." Itmay be remarked here that although Blunderbore was supposed to be anEsquimaux monarch, he was compelled to speak English, beingunfortunately ignorant--if we may so speak--of his native tongue!

  "Oh! 'tis a dismal thing," began Grim again, "to dwell in solitude andcold! 'Tis very cold," (Grim shuddered here tremendously) "and--and--what's next?"

  "Hunger," said Fred.

  "Hunger gnaws my vitals. My name is Blunderbore. 'Twere better had Ibeen born a Blunderbuss, 'cause then I have _gone off_ and dwelt inclimes more shootable to my tender constitoosion. Ha! is that a bear Isees before me?"

  "It's not _sees_," interrupted Fred.

  At this moment a tremendous roar was heard, and O'Riley bounded frombehind a top-sail which represented an iceberg, dressed from head tofoot in the skin of a white bear which had been killed a few daysbefore.

  "Stop, O'Riley," cried Fred, "you're too soon, man. _I_ have to come onfirst as an Esquimaux woman, and when Grim says to the woman he wisheshe could see a bear, _then_ you are to come."

  "Och! whirra, but me brains is confuged intirely wid it all," saidO'Riley, rising on his hind-legs and walking off with his tail,literally as well as figuratively, between his legs.

  "Now, Buzzby, now; it's _your_ time--when you hear the word `misery'come on and fight like a Trojan with the bears. The doctor will remindyou."

  Fred was remarkably patient and painstaking, and his pupils, though notapt scholars, were willing, so that the morning rehearsal was gonethrough with fewer mistakes than might have been expected, and when thecrew came back to dinner about mid-day, which, however, was as dark asmidnight, their parts were sufficiently well got up, and nothingremained to be done but to arrange the stage and scenery for theevening's entertainment--it having been resolved that the performanceshould commence after supper. The stage was at the after part of thecabin, and raised about a foot above the deck, and its management hadbeen intrusted to the doctor, who, assisted by Peter Grim, transformedthat portion of the ship into a scene so romantically beautiful that thefirst sight of it petrified the crew with surprise. But until thecurtain should rise all arrangements were carefully concealed fromeveryone except the _dramatis personae_. Even the captain and officerswere forbidden to peep behind the sail that formed a curtain to thestage, and this secrecy, besides being necessary, was extremely useful,inasmuch as it excited the curiosity of the men and afforded them foodfor converse and speculation, for a week before the great day arrived.

  The longed-for hour came at last. The cabin tables having been removed,and rows of seats placed in front of the stage, the men were admittedfrom the deck, to which they had been expelled an hour previous in ordernot to impede preliminary arrangements. There was great joking, ofcourse, as they took their seats and criticised the fittings up. DavidMizzle was of opinion that the foot-lights "wos oncommon grand", whichwas an unquestionable fact, for they consisted of six tin lamps filledwith seal-oil, from the wicks of which rose a compound of yellow flameand smoke that had a singularly luminous effect. Amos Parr guessed thatthe curtain would be certain sure to get jammed at the first haul, andseveral of the others were convinced that O'Riley would stick his partin one way or another. However, an end was put to all remarks, andexpectation raised on tiptoe by the ringing of a small hand-bell, andimmediately thereafter a violent pulling at the curtain which concealedthe stage; but the curtain remained immovable (they always do on suchoccasions), and a loud whispering was heard behind the scenes.

  "Clap on extra tackle and call all hands to hoist away," suggested oneof the audience.

  The laugh with which this advice was received was checked in the bud bythe sudden rising of the curtain with such violence that the wholeframework of the theatre shook again.

  For a few seconds a dead silence reigned, for the men were stricken dumbwith genuine amazement at the scene before them. The stage was coveredwith white sheets arranged in such a manner as to represent snow, andthe more effectually to carry out the idea, several huge blocks of realice and a few patches of snow were introduced here and there, the coldin the after-part of the cabin being too great to permit of theirmelting. A top-gallant sail, on which were painted several blue cracksand some strong white lights, did duty for an iceberg, and filled up thewhole back of the scene. In front of this, in the centre of the stage,on an extemporised hummock, sat Peter Grim as the Giant Blunderbore.His colossal proportions were enhanced by the addition of an entirewhite bearskin to his ordinary hairy dress, and which was thrown roundhis broad shoulders in the form of a tippet. A broad scarlet sash wastied round his waist, and a crown of brown paper, painted in alternatediamonds of blue, red, and yellow, sat upon his brow. Grim was in trutha magnificent-looking fellow, with his black beard and moustache; andthe mock-heroic frown with which he gazed up (as one of the audiencesuggested) at the Aurora Borealis, while he grasped an enormous club inhis right hand, became him well.

  The first few seconds of dead silence, with which this was received,were succeeded by a long and loud burst of applause, the heartiness ofwhich plainly showed that the scene far exceeded the expectations of themen.

  "Bravo!" cried the captain, "excellent! nothing could be better."

  "It beats natur, quite," said one.

  "All to sticks," cried another.

  "And wot a tree-mendous giant he makes. Three cheers for Peter Grim,lads!"

  Three cheers were promptly given, with right good-wi
ll, but the Giantdid not move a muscle. He was far too deeply impressed with theimportance of playing his part well to acknowledge the compliment.Having gazed long enough to enable the men to get rid of their firstflow of enthusiasm, Blunderbore rose majestically, and, coming forwardto the foot-lights, looked straight over the heads of the men, andaddressed himself to the opposite bulkhead.

  "Oh! 'tis a dismal thing," he began, and continued to spout his partwith flashing eyes and considerable energy until he came to the wordBlunderbuss, when, either from a mistaken notion as to when it was histime to go on, or nervous forgetfulness of the plan of the piece, theLittle Bear sprang over the edge of the iceberg and alighted on themiddle of the stage.

  "Oh! bad luck to yees intirely," said the Big Bear from behind thescenes in an angry whisper, which was distinctly heard by the audience,"ye've gone and spoiled it all, ye have. Come off, will ye, and takeyer turn at the right time, won't ye?"

  In the midst of the shout of delight caused by this mistake, O'Riley,forgetting that he was a bear, rushed on the stage on his hind-legs,seized the Little Bear by the fore-leg, and dragged him off at the otherside amid loud applause. Blunderbore, with admirable self-possession,resumed his part the instant there was a calm, and carried itsuccessfully to a close.

  Just as he ended, Fred waddled on, in the guise of an Esquimaux woman,and so well was he got up that the crew looked round to see if Aninga(who, with her husband, had been allowed to witness the play) was in herplace. Fred had intentionally taken Aninga as his model, and had beenvery successful in imitating the top-knot of hair. The baby, too, washit off to perfection, having been made by Mivins, who proved himself agenius in such matters. Its head was a ball of rags covered with brownleather, and two white bone buttons with black spots in the centre didduty for its eyes.

  The first thing Whackinta did on coming forward was to deposit the babyon the snow with its head downwards by mistake, whereat it began toscream vociferously. This scream was accomplished by Davie Summerscreeping below the stage, and putting his mouth to a hole in theflooring, close to which the baby's head lay. Davie's falsetto wasuncommonly like to a child's voice, and the effect was quite startling.Of course Whackinta tried to soothe it, and, failing in this she whippedit, which caused it to yell with tenfold violence. Thereafter, losingall patience, she covered its face and stuffed its mouth with a quantityof snow, and, laying it down on its back, placed a large block of ice onits head. This, as might be expected, had the desired effect, and thebaby was silenced,--not, however, until Whackinta had twice called downthe hole in a hoarse whisper: "That'll do, Davie; stop, man, stop!"Then, sitting down on the hummock which Blunderbore had just left--andfrom behind which he was now eagerly watching her,--she began to weep.

  Having given full vent to her feelings in a series of convulsive sobs,Whackinta addressed a lengthened harangue, in a melancholy tone ofvoice, to the audience, the gist of which was that she was anunfortunate widow; that two bears had fallen in love with her, andstolen her away from her happy home in Nova Zembla; and, although theyallowed her to walk about as much as she chose, they watched her closelyand prevented her escaping to her own country. Worst of all, they hadtold her that she must agree to become the wife of one or other of them,and if she did not make up her mind, and give them an answer that veryday, she was to be killed and eaten by both of them. In order the morestrongly to impress the audience with her forlorn condition, Whackintasang a tender and touching ditty, composed by herself expressly for theoccasion, and sang it so well that it was encored twice.

  To all this Blunderbore listened with apparent rapture, and at lengthventured to advance and discover himself, but the instant Whackinta sawhim she fell on her knees and trembled violently.

  "Spare me, good king," she said; "do not slay me. I am a poor widow,and have been brought here by two bears against my will."

  "Woman," said the Giant, "my name is Blunderbore. I am, as you perceiveby my crown, a king, and I am a lonely man. If I kill the two bears youspeak of, will you marry me?"

  "Oh, do not ask me, good Blunderbore, I cannot! It is impossible. Icannot love you; you are--forgive me for saying it--too big, and fierce,and ugly to love."

  Blunderbore frowned angrily, and the audience applauded vociferously atthis.

  "You cannot love me! Hah!" exclaimed the Giant, glaring round withclenched teeth.

  At this moment the Big Bear uttered an awful roar, Whackinta gave apiercing scream and fled, and Blunderbore hid himself hastily behind thehummock. The next moment the two bears bounded on the stage and beganto gambol round it, tossing up their hind-legs and roaring and leapingin a manner that drew forth repeated plaudits. At length the LittleBear discovered the baby, and, uttering a frantic roar of delight, tookit in its fore-paws and held it up. The Big Bear roared also of course,and, rushing forward, caught the baby by the leg, and endeavoured totear it away from the Little Bear, at which treatment the poor babyagain commenced to cry passionately. In the struggle the baby's headcame off, upon which the Little Bear put the head into its mouth andswallowed it. The Big Bear immediately did the same with the body; butits mouth was too small, and the body stuck fast and could not befinally disposed of until the Little Bear came to the rescue and pushedit forcibly down its throat. Having finished this delicate littlemorsel, the two bears rose on their hind-legs and danced a hornpipetogether--Tom Singleton playing the tune for them on a flute behind thescenes. When this was done they danced off the stage, and immediately,as if in the distance, was heard the voice of a man singing. It camegradually nearer, and at last Buzzby, in the character of Ben Bolt,swaggered up to the foot-lights with his hands in his breeches pockets.

  "I'm a jolly, jolly tar, Wot has comed from afar, An' it's all for to seek my fortin,"

  sang Buzzby. "But I've not found it yit," he continued, breaking intoprose, "and there don't seem much prospect o' findin' it here anyhow.Wot an 'orrible cold place it is, ugh!"

  Buzzby was received with enthusiastic cheers, for he was dressed in theold familiar blue jacket, white ducks, pumps, and straw hat set jauntilyon one side of his head--a costume which had not been seen for so manymonths by the crew of the _Dolphin_ that their hearts warmed to it as ifit were an old friend.

  Buzzby acted with great spirit and was evidently a prime favourite. Hecould scarcely recollect a word of his part, but he remembered thegeneral drift of it, and had ready wit enough to extemporise. Havingexplained that he was the only survivor of a shipwrecked crew, heproceeded to tell some of his adventures in foreign lands, andafterwards described part of his experiences in a song, to which thedoctor played an accompaniment behind the scenes. The words werecomposed by himself, sung to the well-known Scotch air, "Corn Riggs",and ran as follows:--

  "The Jolly Tar.

  "My comrades, you must know It was many years ago I left my daddy's cottage in the green wood O! And I jined a man-o'-war An' became a jolly tar, An' fought for king and country on the high seas O! Pull, boys, cheerily, our home is on the sea. Pull, boys, merrily and lightly O! Pull, boys, cheerily, the wind is passing free An' whirling up the foam and water sky-high O!

  "There's been many a noble fight, But Trafalgar was the sight That beat the Greeks and Romans in their glory O! For Britain's jolly sons Worked the thunder-blazing guns, And Nelson stood the bravest in the fore-front O! Pull, boys, etcetera.

  "A roaring cannon shot Came an' hit the very spot Where my leg goes click-an'-jumble in the socket O! And swept it overboard With the precious little hoard Of pipe, an' tin, an' baccy in the pocket O! Pull, boys, etcetera.

  "They took me down below, An' they laid me with a row Of killed and wounded messmates on a table O! Then up comes Dr Keg, An' says, Here's a livin' leg I'll sew upon the stump if I am able O! Pull, boys, etcetera.

  "This good and sturdy limb Had belonged to fightin' Tim, An' scarcely had they sewed it on the socket O! When up the hatch I flew, An' dashed among the crew, An' sprang on boar
d the Frenchman like a rocket O! Pull, boys, etcetera.

  "'Twas this that gained the day, For that leg it cleared the way-- And the battle raged like fury while it lasted O! Then ceased the shot and shell To fall upon the swell, And the Union-Jack went bravely to the mast-head O! Pull, boys, etcetera."

  We need scarcely say that this song was enthusiastically encored, andthat the chorus was done full justice to by the audience, who picked itup at once and zang it with lusty vehemence. At the last word Ben Boltnodded familiarly, thrust his hands into his pockets, and swaggered offwhistling "Yankee Doodle". It was a matter of uncertainty where he hadswaggered off to, but it was conjectured that he had gone on his journeyto anywhere that might turn up.

  Meanwhile Blunderbore had been bobbing his head up and down behind thehummock in amazement at what he heard and saw, and when Ben Bolt madehis exit he came forward. This was the signal for the two bears todiscover him and rush on with a terrific roar. Blunderbore instantlyfetched them each a sounding whack on their skulls, leaped over boththeir backs, and bounded up the side of the iceberg, where he tookrefuge, and turned at bay on a little ice pinnacle constructed expresslyfor that purpose.

  An awful fight now ensued between the Giant and the two bears. Thepinnacle on which Blunderbore stood was so low that the Big Bear, bystanding up on its hind-legs, could just scratch his toes, which causedthe Giant to jump about continually, but the sides of the iceberg wereso smooth that the bears could not climb up it. This difficulty,indeed, constituted the great and amusing feature of the fight, for nosooner did the Little Bear creep up to the edge of the pinnacle than theGiant's tremendous club came violently down on his snout (which had beenmade of hard wood on purpose to resist the blows) and sent it sprawlingback on the stage, where the Big Bear invariably chanced to be in theway, and always fell over it. Then they both rose, and, roaringfearfully, renewed the attack, while Blunderbore laid about him with theclub ferociously. Fortune, however, did not on this occasion favour thebrave. The Big Bear at last caught the Giant by the heel and pulled himto the ground; the Little Bear instantly seized him by the throat, and,notwithstanding his awful yells and struggles, it would have gone illwith Blunderbore had not Ben Bolt opportunely arrived at that identicalspot at that identical moment in the course of his travels.

  Oh! it was a glorious thing to see the fear-nothing, dare-anythingfashion in which, when he saw how matters stood, Ben Bolt threw down hisstick and bundle, drew his cutlass, and attacked the two bears at once,single-handed, crying "Come on," in a voice of thunder. And it was asatisfactory thing, to behold the way, in which he cut and slashed attheir heads (the heads having been previously prepared for suchtreatment), and the agility he displayed in leaping over their backs andunder their legs, and holding on by their tails, while they vainlyendeavoured to catch him. The applause was frequent and prolonged, andthe two Esquimaux prisoners rolled about their burly figures and laughedtill the tears ran down their fat cheeks. But when Ben Bolt suddenlycaught the two bears by their tails, tied them together in a doubleknot, and fled behind a hummock, which the Big Bear passed on one sideand the little Bear on the other, and so, as a matter of course, stuckhard and fast, the laughter was excessive; and when the gallant Britishseaman again rushed forward, massacred the Big Bear with two terrificcuts, slew the Little Bear with one tremendous back-hander, and thensank down on one knee and pressed his hand to his brow as if he wereexhausted, a cheer ran from stem to stern of the _Dolphin_, the like ofwhich had not filled the hull of that good ship, since she was launchedupon her ocean home!

  It was just at this moment that Whackinta chanced, curiously enough, toreturn to this spot in the course of _her_ wanderings. She screamed inhorror at the sight of the dead bears, which was quite proper andnatural, and then she started at the sight of the exhausted Bolt, andsmiled sweetly--which was also natural--as she hastened to assist andsympathise with him. Ben Bolt fell in love with her at once, and toldher so off-hand, to the unutterable rage of Blunderbore, who recoveredfrom his wounds at that moment and, seizing the sailor by the throat,vowed he would kill, and quarter, and stew, and boil, and roast, and eathim in one minute if he didn't take care what he was about.

  The audience felt some fears for Ben Bolt at this point, but theirdelight knew no bounds when, shaking the Giant off, and springingbackwards, he buttoned up his coat and roared, rather than said, thatthough he were all the Blunderbores and Blunderbusses in the worldrolled together, and changed into one immortal blunder-cannon, he didn'tcare a pinch of bad snuff for him, and would knock all the teeth in hishead down his throat. This valorous threat he followed up by shakinghis fist close under the Giant's nose, and crying out: "Come on!"

  But the Giant did not come on; he fortunately recollected that he owedhis life to the brave sailor, so he smiled, and, saying he would be hisfriend through life, insisted on seizing him by the hand and shaking itviolently. Thereafter he took Ben Bolt and Whackinta by their righthands, and, leading them forward to the foot-lights, made them a longspeech to the effect that he owed a debt of gratitude to the former forsaving his life which he could never repay, and that he loved the lattertoo sincerely to stand in the way of her happiness. Then he joinedtheir right hands, and they went down on one knee, and he placed hishands on their heads, and looked up at the audience with a benignantsmile, and the curtain fell amid rapturous cheers.

  In this play it seemed somewhat curious and unaccountable that Whackintaforgot to enquire for her demolished baby, and appeared to feel noanxiety whatever about it; it was also left a matter of uncertaintywhether Ben Bolt and his Esquimaux bride returned to live happily duringthe remainder of their lives in England, or took up their permanentabode with Blunderbore; but it is not our province to criticise--wemerely chronicle events as they occurred.

  The entertainments were to conclude with a hornpipe from Mivins, butjust as that elastic individual had completed the first of a series ofcomplicated evolutions, and was about to commence the second, avociferous barking of the dogs was heard outside, accompanied by thesound of human voices. The benches were deserted in a moment and themen rushed upon deck, catching up muskets and cutlasses, which alwaysstood in readiness, as they went. The sounds proceeded from a party ofabout twenty Esquimaux, who had been sent from the camp with the stolenproperty, and with a humble request that the offence might be forgiven,and their chief and his wife returned to them. They were all unarmed,and the sincerity of their repentance was further attested by the factthat they brought back, not only the hatchet and telescope, but a largeassortment of minor articles that had not been missed.

  Of course the apology was accepted; and after speeches were delivered,and protestations of undying friendship made on both sides, the partywere presented with a few trinkets and a plug of tobacco each, and sentback in a state of supreme happiness to their village, where for a weekAwatok kept the men of his tribe, and Aninga the women, in a state ofintense amazement by their minute descriptions of the remarkable doingsof the white strangers.

  The friendship thus begun between the Esquimaux and the _Dolphin's_ crewwas never once interrupted by any unpleasant collision during the monthsthat they afterwards travelled and hunted in company. Strength ofmuscle and promptitude in action are qualities which all nations in asavage state understand and respect; and the sailors proved that theypossessed these qualities in a higher degree than themselves during thehardships and dangers incident to Arctic life, while at the same timetheir seemingly endless resources and contrivances impressed the simplenatives with the belief that white men could accomplish anything theychose to attempt.