Page 2
“I’ll decide that. ” He pointed down the hall. “Go. ”
With a sigh, she plodded down the hall, a sad slump pulling at her shoulders. Liam gritted his teeth against the stab of guilt. Sorting out this mess would do a lot more to help her than sex.
Dragging in a steadying breath, he watched her disappear into their room, then charged toward Hammer’s office. Steeling himself, Liam shoved his way inside and slammed the door.
The bastard looked up from his paperwork and frowned.
“What the fuck just happened?” Liam demanded. “I let Raine spend a few minutes with you, and she left distraught. ”
“Don’t come into my office looking for a fight, O’Neill. You won’t like how it ends, and neither will Raine. For some reason, she likes your face the way it is. ”
“What did you do to my sub?” he snarled.
Hammer stood with such force, his chair rolled and hit the metal filing cabinet behind his desk. “Worried that I grabbed her tits? Copped a feel of her pussy? Fucked her? All with the door wide open?”
“You want her. So whether the door was open or closed wouldn’t matter if you thought you could get away with it. Of that, I’m sure. ”
“What did Raine say? Or haven’t you figured out yet how to make her communicate with you?” He crossed his arms over his chest with a sneer.
“I want your side of things. ”
Hammer snorted. “So she didn’t tell you shit. Let me clue you in on a little secret: You’ll need a crowbar to open her up when she walls herself off, like she’s doing right now. ”
“That’s no secret. I’ll deal with that. Did you touch her, yes or no?”
“I didn’t break the Code of Conduct. ” He tugged stiffly on his suit coat.
“Let’s not pretend that honoring the Code would mean a damn thing to you if not for your fellow Doms’ disapproval. Respect Raine enough not to make this situation any more difficult and tell me what happened. ”
“I’m not making it more difficult; I’m ensuring that she runs back to me when you figure out she’s more than you can manage. I know how to handle her. ”
The silky threat in Hammer’s voice crawled up Liam’s back. He swallowed an answering insult. He needed answers more than he needed a fight—no matter how badly he wanted one. Hammer blamed him for losing Raine, obviously so enraged that he could barely see straight. And Liam couldn’t forget—or forgive—that Hammer had done his bloody best to plant a seed in her womb the moment Liam took her for his own.
He rubbed at the knot at the back of his neck, staring at Macen. “If you care about her at all, put her needs first for once. Tell me what has her rattled. ”
“I didn’t take any liberties, so stop busting my balls. ”
“I don’t care about your balls. I’m here to protect Raine. ”
“Yeah?” Hammer gave him a hard glare. “You don’t seem too worried. Do you know how many days late her period is? I sure as hell do. ”
There was the proverbial punch in the gut. Raine’s monthly was late…just as he’d suspected. Liam closed his eyes, damn near crippled where he stood.
Hammer knew the answer to the question Liam had asked Raine many times. No matter how Liam had tried to wrest it from her, she’d danced around the truth, as though possibly being pregnant by another man was none of his goddamned business.
What else was she keeping from him? Time to pry Raine open and find out.
Liam turned away and opened the door.
“Wait,” Hammer called him back. “I want you to know that night with Raine was the only time I haven’t gloved up since Juliet. I’m clean. She really is just scared and lashing out. It’s how she copes. Don’t take my mistake out on her. ”
Liam didn’t turn back, just curled his hands into fists. “Fuck you. ”
Chapter 2
Raine paced, wringing her hands, her head a tangle of a thousand thoughts. Damn it, she always let Hammer push her buttons. Why hadn’t she gotten him out of her system? She bit her lip. In three days, he was going to force the truth on her, and it terrified her.
What if she was pregnant? God, did she even know how to feel about that? On the one hand, blessed. She loved kids. She loved Hammer. She loved the idea that her six years of unrequited love for him might bear fruit. On the other hand, if she was carrying the child of Liam’s former friend, she didn’t expect the man to stay. Despite his assurances, why would he?
As she fingered her collar, Raine felt her expression crumble. Crying wouldn’t change the fact that she loved two very different men for very different reasons. If Liam left her. . . Well, she had no one to blame for her stupidity but herself.
Suddenly, the door opened, and she spun to face him, bracing herself for the confrontation she’d desperately tried to avoid. He looked somewhere between somber and furious. Her heart sank. She had no doubt what he and Hammer had discussed. Today she’d gotten the message loud and clear that Macen wanted to separate her from Liam. One topic could do that very quickly.
Raine ran to him and threw her arms around his neck, all too aware that if things turned out as she feared, this might be one of the last times she held him. She clung and inhaled his musky scent. He was all man. Her rock. Her greatest comfort. Her most tender lover. And he was slipping through her fingers because she was an eternal fuckup.
“Liam. . . ” She pressed her lips to his, willing him to kiss her back, lower her to the bed, and forget about everything else.
He cupped her face and studied her. The dark eyes that usually caressed her with such caring now dissected her with a razor-sharp stare. “We need to talk. ”
Panic seized her heart as Liam led her toward their bed. Though Raine knew she owed it to him to discuss her problems, that only made them more real.
As she sank to the mattress beside him, she looked into his beloved face. His stormy eyes wrenched her heart. She’d done this to him, taken this strong, gorgeous man and turned him inside out. Guilt crushed her.
“Can’t we talk later?” She caressed a hand down his chest, letting it drift lower and lower. . . “I’ve missed you. ” Her eyes teared up. “I’m begging. ”
“There’s nothing I’d enjoy more than to bury myself between your thighs, love, but you can’t distract me from this. Stop trying. ”
If they had this conversation now, it would only end in disaster. “There’s nothing to talk about. Hammer and I got into an argument. We were discussing the menu for Thanksgiving and—”
“Thanksgiving?” He scowled. “Did you make plans of your own, then?”
She blinked in confusion. “Not plans of my own. I just assumed. . . I always cook for Hammer. ” Immediately, she saw that Liam had taken her words the wrong way. “What I mean is, I always cook so that he can host a Thanksgiving dinner for the ‘orphans’ of Shadows. You know, the people with no other family and nowhere else to go. They’ll spend it alone if I don’t fix this dinner, and it’s too late to hire a caterer now. ”
Liam cursed. “And when were you thinking of telling me? Am I even invited?”
“Of course!” Dismay spread through her. He looked angry. But worse, he looked hurt. “I assumed you knew about the group dinner. We have it every year, but…” Oh no. A fresh wave of worry overcame her. “But you haven’t been here long enough to know. I’m so sorry. ”
His expression didn’t soften one bit.
Raine swallowed. “Really. I’ve been so…” Preoccupied. “Busy. I didn’t realize that I’d never mentioned it. ”
“I had a special surprise planned just for the two of us. ”
Shit, she just kept digging herself a deeper hole with him. “I didn’t even think that you might want to do something else. Next year. . . ”
Raine couldn’t finish that sentence. Next year, if nature had taken its course, she’d have an infant, and Liam would be long gone. Even the thought filled her with terror. Still, what else could she do? Hammer and
the others were counting on her. Serving this meal every Thanksgiving was one of her greatest pleasures.
“If we can do whatever you had planned on Thursday night, I’d be thrilled and honored to go with you,” she ventured.
And maybe, if she was lucky, Liam would have her somewhere else on Friday so she could avoid Hammer and the doctor appointment he’d threatened. Yes, she was putting off the inevitable, but she just couldn’t face the future now.
He glared at her, his face forbidding.
Raine rushed to reassure him. “Thursday night, I’ll be done with my responsibilities here and I’ll be all yours again. ”
“You’re not all mine now, sub?” He rose to his full height. “Am I only your Sir when it’s convenient for you?”
Oh, shit… “That’s not what I meant. Of course I’m yours. ” Liam usually wasn’t much for protocol and honorifics, but she couldn’t mistake his demeanor. Raine resisted the urge to shrink back against the headboard. “Sir. ”
The title had almost no impact on him. He still glared at her with dark eyes full of disapproval. “Don’t forget it. ”
“No, Sir. ” God, she hated feeling unworthy, like she never did anything right.
“The private Thanksgiving I had planned for us? I’ll flush that down the fucking toilet. ”
Her dread soared. “I feel terrible about disappointing you, especially on Thanksgiving. I want to enjoy what you planned, but I can’t let twenty-five others down. How can I make it up to you?”
“By telling me how late your period is. ”
She felt the blood drain from her face. “I told you last week that I wasn’t late. ”
A dark brow jetted up. “And this week?”
“Liam…”
“What did you call me?” He glowered, tangling his hand in her hair, pulling just enough for her to feel the sting.
“Sir. ”
“Better. Now answer me. Hammer apparently knows exactly how late your period is, while I have no bloody clue. ”
Damn Hammer for not keeping his mouth shut. “I didn’t say anything. He’s been counting days. I’ve tried not to upset you—or anyone—until I knew something for sure. ”
“You must have some idea whether you’re pregnant, Raine. ”
“How should I? I’ve never worried about this. ”
Liam whirled away and stormed into the adjoining bathroom. After the rustle of plastic, he returned a moment later, carrying a box. He slammed it on her nightstand.
A pregnancy test.
Her heart stopped.
“I bought this for you last night. Let’s end the worrying. ” Liam crossed his arms over his chest. “Take it. ”
She backed away. “Don’t make me. Please…”
Her pleading did absolutely nothing but make his expression colder.
“I’ve been patient. ”
He had been, just like he always was. She had no right to expect more. But she needed it so badly.
Raine shook her head. “I can’t. I’m too scared to pee on that stick and find out for sure. I’m afraid the truth will drive you away. ”
That was as honest as her courage allowed.
His mouth turned down in a disapproving scowl. “Is that why you and Hammer fought?”
She nodded. “He threatened to take me to the doctor on Friday if I still haven’t started. ”
“And you wanted to avoid that so badly, you were going to ‘let me’ take you away Thursday night, after dinner at Shadows?”
“No, I really do want to be with you,” she choked. “I’m sorry. About the test, Thanksgiving…” She tried, but nothing would stop her tears. “About everything. ”
“I don’t want you to be sorry. I want you to be honest,” he shouted. “Open up and tell me what’s bothering you. Your fears. Your insecurities. What the fuck you want for dinner. Whether or not you’re pregnant. I’m sick to death of being in the dark. I won’t be treated like the bloody wanker you find ways to dodge. ”
“You’re not, I swear. Liam…I’m scared. ”
“I know you are, but if you won’t face the truth or trust me to help you…” He gritted his teeth. “Then my hands are tied. ”
Shame engulfed Raine. She knew she didn’t share things with Liam the way she should. He’d stripped her soul so naked once before, and she’d cowered behind her walls since. They couldn’t have a genuine exchange if she continued this way, but anxiety drove her to shut him out.
“I’m trying. ” She couldn’t make the tears and the sorrow stop. “You may not believe me—”
“I’d believe you if you’d take the damn test. ”
Raine crossed her arms over her chest, every muscle in her body shriveling. “I’m not ready. I can’t face it. Not yet. ”