This book has not been copyedited, mainly because I have the proof reading skills of a goldfish (perhaps the least capable at proof reading of all household pets). For the sake of argument, just assume that any typos, punctuation errors, cupertinos, solecisms, spelling errors and malapropism are there as a parody of your least favourite publishers editorial policies. British English spelling has been used throughout except for the word ‘wastebasket’ which in Britain is spelt with an x.