“I got to church and your mother said you’d come here instead, so I left and came looking for you. What’s up?” He avoided looking at Carley.
Carley groaned and flopped back onto her pillow. Just what she needed—Jon to muddy up her plan. And just when she’d almost had Janelle persuaded.
“What’s up is that my sister has some harebrained idea about me impersonating her for this guy she’s met in the next room.”
Jon looked confused.
“He’s temporarily blind,” Carley interjected, none too kindly. “So he’s never seen my face, and most likely never will. But his friends are coming to visit him this afternoon and he wants them to meet me and see what a ‘babe’ I am. But we all know that’s not the case, don’t we?”
Jon’s face colored, but he still shook his head. “I don’t want any guy coming onto my girl.” His arm snaked around Janelle’s waist possessively.
“Oh, puh-lease.…” Carley rolled her eyes dramatically. “Think of it as a temporary loan.”
Even Janelle looked exasperated with him. “Cut the Neanderthal routine, Jon. I’m a person, not your property.”
“But you’re my girl!”
“And Carley’s my sister.”
“You’re not seriously thinking about doing this, are you?” Jon sounded angry.
“What if I am?” Now that Janelle was on the defensive, Carley decided to keep quiet and let the two of them argue it out. Maybe Jon’s attitude was just the push Janelle needed to send her into Carley’s camp on this issue.
“Because it’s dumb, that’s why.”
“Yes, it’s dumb, but Carley is my sister, and she wants my help.”
“If she asked you to jump in front of a moving car, would you do it?”
“That is so lame. Just the kind of thing you’d tell a two-year-old. Which I’m not!” Janelle whirled around and started for the door. “I’m going to buy myself a Coke. Cool off, Jon!”
She grabbed her purse and flounced out the door. Jon glared after her.
“Not much fun to be called names, is it?” Carley asked him when they were alone.
Jon gave her a sullen glance and crossed to the window, where he stood with his hands thrust into his pockets and scowled.
Carley sat forward and swung her legs over the side of the bed. “It wouldn’t kill you to cooperate, you know. We’re talking a fifteen-minute visit that won’t mean anything to you, but will mean everything to me. And to Kyle.”
“It’s just not right,” Jon answered.
“Lots of things happen that aren’t right. Like getting cancer when you’re twelve and turning into a permanent sideshow. You know, someone’s idea of a joke.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Woof-woof.” She saw the back of his neck and ears flush red. He turned slowly and their gazes locked. “I’m sorry you don’t like me,” she said. “But I can’t help the way I look. And I don’t like people making fun of me.”
“Who says I don’t like you?”
“It’s written all over your face every time you look at me. Or rather, don’t look at me.”
She was surprised when he said, “I really care for Janelle. She means everything to me. Are you going to ruin it for us?”
Carley felt a sense of power and for a minute wanted to see him squirm, but the feeling passed when she remembered how urgently she needed Janelle’s help. No use causing a scene simply to get revenge. “Wrecking people’s lives isn’t my style,” she told him. “But I would appreciate a good word from you. It would help this deal go down much more easily.”
Before he could respond, Janelle swept back into the room, a can of diet cola in her hand. “The vending machine hardly had anything good,” she grumbled.
Jon took a deep breath and stepped in front of her. “I’ve been thinking while you were gone.”
Carley resisted the urge to blurt, “That’s what you smell burning—Jon’s brain.”
“I think you should help Carley.”
Janelle glanced from Jon to Carley and back again to Jon. “I was gone less than ten minutes. How did she persuade you so quickly? Especially when she’s been working on me for an hour.”
“I overreacted. What she wants is really sort of harmless.” He glanced toward Carley. “Sort of like wearing a mask for Halloween. This guy will be happy. Carley will be happy. No one will know it’s you. And then that’s the end of it.”
Carley ignored Jon’s bad humor and nodded eagerly. “I told you, Sis, it’ll only take a few minutes, and you don’t ever have to do it again.”
Janelle’s shoulders drooped. “I hate it when people gang up on me. Especially people I care about.”
Carley felt a twist of guilt and vowed she’d make it up to her sister sometime. “I’ll be grateful forever.”
Her phone rang and she grabbed the receiver. It was Kyle. “Hi,” she said cheerfully.
“You’re in your room.”
“You sound surprised.”
“You usually run off.”
“Now, now,” she chided.
“Listen, my friends Steve and Jason are here. They were cohorts in my infamous rocket-fuel stunt, except that they didn’t get hurt. Anyway we want to come by and say hello.”
“Don’t do that!” Carley cut her eyes to Janelle and Jon, tucked the receiver beneath her chin, and pointed frantically at the wheelchair she’d confiscated earlier from the nurses’ station. “What I mean is, why don’t I come to your room? It’s a mess here and I don’t want strange boys around.” Janelle rolled her eyes. “I can be there in five minutes,” Carley added, ignoring her sister.
“Sure, no problem,” Kyle told her. “Come soon.”
“I can’t stay long,” she warned. “I have visitors coming too, and I want to be in my room when they arrive.”
“No problem. Stay ten minutes. Stay an hour. I only want my friends to meet you.” She heard a smile in his voice. “I only want them to meet the most special girl in the whole world.”
Ten
“I really hate this,” Janelle whispered as Jon helped her into the wheelchair.
Carley limped over with a blanket from off the bed. “But I need you to do it so much. And I’ll never forget how you helped me. I’ll be grateful forever!” She pumped up the area with a pillow and tossed the blanket across Janelle’s lap.
Jon leaned down and adjusted the footrest so that Janelle could prop her leg in a thrust-out position. “You know how to work one of these things?”
“I can manage,” Janelle snapped.
Carley fussed with the blanket, making sure that it covered Janelle’s lap and leg completely. “Just tell him—”
“I know what to say.” Janelle pushed herself toward the door, paused, and scowled back at Carley and Jon. “What about my voice? Do you think he’s clever enough to hear a difference?”
Carley’s stomach constricted. She’d forgotten about her voice. “You can do a pretty good imitation of me. You always did when we were little and you wanted to get me in trouble with Mom.”
“We’ve grown up since then. At least, one of us has.”
Carley gritted her teeth. Janelle certainly wasn’t being agreeable. “You’re going to do just fine,” she said. “And you’ll never know how much this means to me. Never, ever.”
Janelle rolled out into the hall while Jon and Carley peeked around the doorframe. When Janelle knocked on Kyle’s door, Carley ducked backward. “She’s in,” Jon said. “Now what?”
“Now we loiter in the hall by his door and maybe we can hear something.”
Jon looked at her as if she were nuts, but he tagged along when she hopped out on her crutches. She rested her back on the wall beside Kyle’s door, and Jon leaned his shoulder against the wall next to her. She strained to hear through the slightly ajar door, but only snatches of words and mumbles came to her. She whispered, “I sure wish I could hear better.”
Jon arched his eyebrow at her. “If only we’d thought to put
a tape machine in her lap, she could have gotten the whole conversation.”
She flashed him a hateful look. All at once her knees started shaking as it dawned on her that she was manipulating people’s lives! She was working so hard to protect herself that she was forcing her sister and her sister’s boyfriend to conform to her will. And she was deceiving Kyle and his friends by misrepresenting herself to them. She felt a wave of guilt and remorse. And fear. If Kyle found out about her now, he really would hate her. And she couldn’t blame him. But she felt as if she’d gone so far with her charade that she couldn’t drop it now. She couldn’t tell him the truth at this stage.
Kyle’s room door swung open and Janelle rolled out in the wheelchair, waving goodbye over her shoulder. Carley ducked under Jon’s arm and headed in the opposite direction down the hall, fearful that one of Kyle’s friends might stick his head out the doorway and see her. When she felt it was safe, she returned to her room. Janelle and Jon were preparing to leave.
She shut the door fast. “So what happened?”
“Nothing happened. I was charming and sweet.”
“Did Kyle say anything?”
“He said he’d call me later.” Janelle picked up her purse and slipped on her coat. “But of course, he thinks I’m you.”
“You don’t have to leave yet. We could watch an NBA game on TV, or maybe some old movie.” Now that the charade was over, Carley didn’t want to be left alone. She wanted her sister to stay. She wanted to get back into Janelle’s good graces.
“I’ve got a Lit test tomorrow and I need to study for it.” Janelle started for the door with Jon.
“Janelle,” Carley called. “Thanks.”
Janelle didn’t smile. “You’re welcome. We’ll walk down the stairwell to the ground floor,” she said. “Less chance of being seen by Kyle’s friends.”
Then Janelle and Jon were gone and Carley was alone. All alone.
“My friends were suitably impressed.” Kyle was eating dinner in Carley’s room. Their trays were spread out on the small table near the window, and the TV played softly in the background.
“That’s nice,” Carley said, grateful that he couldn’t see how little she was eating. She didn’t have much of an appetite tonight.
“What did you think of them?”
She started. Why hadn’t she pressed Janelle for more details? “They seemed nice.”
“Nice?” Kyle cocked his head. “Steve practically fell over your chair. Did he hurt your leg?”
“No. I’m fine.”
“Is anything wrong?” His expression looked puzzled.
“No. Why do you ask?”
He touched his meat loaf, gave the plate a small turn, and cut off a piece with his fork. Carley realized he’d become quite adept at feeding himself despite his blindness. “You—um—sounded funny today.”
“Funny ha-ha or funny peculiar?” She tried to laugh off his observation, but her heart began to thud.
“I don’t know. Your voice sounded different to me this afternoon. Not like your usual self. I’ve grown used to your voice and the way it sounds. I like it.”
“How does my voice sound?”
“Sort of sexy.”
She giggled with pure pleasure. Her voice was hers alone, and he liked it. She didn’t have to speak through her sister’s mouth. It was Carley’s voice Kyle heard. “Sexy? Me?”
“That’s what I said.” He grinned. “When all you have is someone’s voice to go on, you notice the smallest change. And today you just didn’t sound like yourself.”
“Um—I had a little allergy attack right before I came by to see you. Maybe that made me sound different.”
“Maybe so.” He still acted perplexed, but she didn’t pursue it and decided to change the topic to get his mind on something else. “So, have you heard how much longer you’ll be locked in this place?”
“My doctor hasn’t said. How about you?”
“The antibiotic is working fine—no fever for days. I’ll get another X ray tomorrow.”
“So you may be leaving sooner than me.”
“I’ve been here for over a week and I’d like to leave. Wouldn’t you?”
“Sure.” But his tone was hesitant. “It’s a little scary, though, thinking of going outside these walls when I still can’t see.”
“Will someone be with you when you go home?”
He shook his head. “Both my folks work, so I’ll have to be on my own for most of the day. It wouldn’t be so bad if I could see. I’m behind in all my schoolwork and I’m in accelerated classes. I’ll probably never catch up.”
“Are we having a pity party?”
“You’re not going to let me feel sorry for myself? Not even just a little?”
“It won’t help.” Carley toyed with her fork. She wasn’t being insensitive to his plight, but she knew how senseless it was to sit around complaining about what couldn’t be changed. Life went on whether a person participated in it or not. “But I know how it feels to be swamped with schoolwork. That’s enough to give anybody a downer.”
He laughed. “Well, I’m not ready to learn braille and I don’t want to spent the summer in school, so I’m not sure how I’ll catch up.”
“Why don’t you have Steve or Jason tape your class lectures for you? Maybe then you wouldn’t fall so far behind.”
He straightened in the chair. “Why didn’t I think of that?” He sounded amazed that something so obvious could have eluded him.
“You don’t have a brain as devious as mine?” she offered playfully.
“Carley, that’s a great idea. My dad could arrange to have all my classes taped and I can keep up that way. Why, I might even be able to take tests orally.”
She tapped his hand. “I charge big bucks for advice, you know.”
“I’ll pay.” They laughed together, but soon Kyle grew quiet, thoughtful. “Can I tell you something?”
She nodded, then realized that he couldn’t see her. “Sure,” she said for emphasis.
“I like you.”
She felt her mouth go dry. “I like you too.”
“Once we both go home, can I call you? Visit with you?”
So long as you’re blind, she thought, but she said, “Oh gosh, once you get back to regular life, you’ll forget all about me.”
Kyle grabbed her hand and held it tightly. “Not so, Carley. I’ll never forget you.”
She felt a wave of fear. There was no way they could have a relationship once they were both out of the hospital. Sooner or later someone would see her and tell Kyle the truth. Certainly there would be no way she could ever persuade Janelle to impersonate her again. How could she put him off without hurting his feelings or telling him more than she ever wanted him to know? “Why don’t we wait and see how things go once we blow this place?”
“You don’t want me to keep in touch, do you?” He looked dejected.
“I didn’t say that.”
“But it’s what you meant. Is it because I could be permanently blind? Is it because you don’t want to be stuck with a guy who’s blind?”
“No way,” she started to protest.
Kyle interrupted. “Steve and Jason told me how pretty you are. I can’t figure out why you don’t have a boyfriend, unless you’re so beautiful that you can pick anyone you want. If that’s the case, I don’t stand a chance.”
In her heart she longed to tell him that he was handsome, smart, nice—the most wonderful guy she’d ever known. And that having him for a boyfriend would be the greatest thing that ever happened to her. But of course she couldn’t. She could never let him know how she truly felt. “I think we should not talk about this stuff,” she said quietly. “I think we should have fun right now and not talk about tomorrow.” “But—”
“Please,” she begged. “Let’s just be friends as long as we’re here.”
“If that’s what you want.…” He tried to keep the hurt out of his voice.
“It’s what I want.”
> Eleven
“You’re going home? Lucky you.” Reba gave Carley a wistful look. “I sure am going to miss you.”
“I’ll call you,” Carley said, feeling sorry for Reba, who was still recovering from her abdominal surgery. “And before you know it, you’ll be headed home too.” Home for Reba was a small town in middle Tennessee, at least four hours from Knoxville and the hospital.
“When are you leaving?” “My mom’s packing my stuff and filling out the paperwork right now.”
“I’m glad you stopped by to tell me. Have you told Kyle?”
Carley shook her head. “He’s my next stop.” She didn’t let on how much she was dreading it.
“What have you decided to do about him?”
“Nothing. I figure that once he goes home, he’ll get on with his life.”
Reba dismissed the idea with a wave of her hand. “I think you’re dreaming. I think he’s going to want to see you.”
“Don’t say that. You and I both know it’s impossible.”
“Wrong. You think it’s impossible, so you won’t change your mind about telling him the truth.”
Carley squealed, “Will you stop it already! I know what I’m doing.”
Reba shook her head in exasperation. “Never mind. It’s like talking to a brick wall.” She grinned. “Anyway, keep your promise and call me. I know we haven’t been friends for long, but you’re my best friend ever and I want things to work out for you. You know, Carley, in spite of the way your face looks, you really do have a shot at being normal.”
“Just how do you figure that?”
Reba’s gaze led to the wheelchair parked near her bed. “I wish my face was the only thing messed up about me.”
Impulsively Carley leaned down and hugged her. “I’ll be in touch.” She positioned her crutches under her arms and retreated from the room.
She stopped at Kyle’s door, took a deep breath, and knocked. When he called, “Come in,” she did.
“I got my walking papers,” she told him without preamble.
His bandages couldn’t hide his disappointment. “I’ll miss you.”