Her mother sighed. “Very well. Let’s go. We promised Nancy we’d pick her up at five-thirty.”
Julie’s parents left and minutes later, Frank, Solena, and Luke drove up to her house. “You look good enough to kiss,” Luke told her when she slid into the backseat of Frank’s car.
“I’m puckered up.”
He kissed her lightly. “I’m nervous,” he confided. “People have been acting strange around me. Especially Frank.” He nodded toward the back of Frank’s head. The customary hat was pulled low over Frank’s ears.
Solena glanced back and rolled her eyes. She was clearly disgusted with Frank, but Julie didn’t care. She was glad the guys were wearing their matching caps.
The dining hall of the luxury hotel was packed with tables and crowded with people. Each sport had been granted a specific area of the great room. Football took up the largest space and was up front, near the podium. At the speakers’ table, stretching across the front of the room, special dignitaries were seated. Julie waved to her parents, who were seated between the principal and school superintendent.
All through the meal and award presentations, Julie held Luke’s hand under the table. She realized it was difficult for him to sit through the ceremony, knew that every award, every word of praise reminded him of the “before time”—before he got cancer. Luke was showered with certificates and trophies, including the prestigious Player of the Year, an award that usually went to a graduating senior, not a junior. But there was little doubt that he deserved it. Leading the team to the semifinals of the state championship was something no athlete from Waterton had done in over twenty-five years.
“We’ll win it next year,” Julie’s father said into the mike as Luke made his way back to his seat carrying his trophy. The room erupted into cheers and shouts. Coach Ellis held up his hands for quiet. “I have a little something I want to show all of you,” he said.
A curtain parted and two waiters carried out an easel. On it was a large, flat object covered with a velvet drape. “Ladies and gentlemen,” Coach Ellis said with little fanfare, “I want to present the final drawings of the new Waterton Warriors football stadium.”
He pulled off the drape and exposed a gorgeous artist’s rendering of a brand-new stadium. The crowd applauded wildly. “We’ll break ground this summer,” the coach said. “And although it won’t be completed until the following fall, it will be the best stadium with the finest playing turf in the state. In fact, we may play the state championships here in the future.”
Again, wild applause. Julie squeezed Luke’s hand. The stadium would not be ready in time for him to play in it, but it was still nice for her to see one of her father’s dreams come true.
“Uh—Coach …,” Frank called, then stood up, walked swiftly to the front, and spoke into the mike. “The guys would like to say thanks for a great year.” He handed Julie’s dad a long white envelope, which Julie knew contained tickets for a night on the town in Chicago.
“And one more thing,” Frank said.
In unison, the players stood. Mystified, Julie gave Luke a questioning look. Equally baffled, he shrugged.
“This is for you, Luke, buddy. It’s a little present that the guys and Coach want to give you.”
One by one, the team members removed their baseball caps to expose heads shaved perfectly bald. Every one of them, even her father, had shaved his head clean. People gasped, then began to applaud. Then they stood and looked toward Luke.
Julie rose to her feet, her gaze locked on Luke’s face, a lump the size of a fist lodged in her throat. She saw tears shimmering in his eyes. Then he too stood, swept off his hat from his smooth head, and bowed in tribute to the sacrifice his coach and friends had made in his honor.
10
Julie celebrated the completion of Luke’s chemo by throwing a party, and she gave it the night her parents were to go into Chicago to use their banquet gift certificate.
“I’m not sure, Julie,” her mother said when Julie told her the plans. “I hate to leave you and your friends unchaperoned.”
“Mother, please.” Julie sighed dramatically. “My friends know how to act. Most of them are Daddy’s players; they’re not going to get crazy or anything. Daddy would make their lives miserable.”
“No alcohol,” her mother said emphatically.
“Not to worry. Everybody wants Luke to have a good time and so I know they’ll be on their best behavior.”
“Is Solena going to help you?”
“Solena and a couple of others. We’ll clean everything up. Don’t worry.”
So, her parents left in the early afternoon and Julie and her friends baked pizzas, made tacos, whipped up batches of chocolate chip cookies, hung lights on the back patio and deck, and set up two sets of stereo speakers—indoors and out. Just before six o’clock, the girls went up to Julie’s room and got ready.
“Hair spray!” Solena shrieked. “I forgot my hair spray.”
“Put a lid on it,” Diane called. “Use mine.”
Julie watched her friends running around and felt satisfaction. She thought back to those long days when Luke was in the hospital and recalled how much she had missed this kind of activity. One thing about the whole experience—it certainly made her more appreciative of everyday life. And grateful for life’s “little things.”
Although it was May, the evenings were still cool. Julie wore a dress and a lightweight sweater the same color as her eyes, and when Luke arrived with Frank, his expression told her that her choice had been perfect.
“Look at this,” he said, and sweeping off his cap, he bent to show her the top of his head.
“There’s black fuzz,” she exclaimed.
He grinned. “I figure it’ll soon be long enough for you to run your fingers through.”
“Why wait?” she asked, and brushed her palm over the downy growth.
Frank was dancing past with Solena. “Make a wish,” he called to Julie.
“I wish it’ll grow so long so fast, he’ll have to wear a ponytail to the first football practice.”
“If any of us come to training camp next August with ponytails, your father will personally shave our heads again.”
They laughed, and Julie leaned forward and placed a kiss on top of Luke’s head. Her bright pink lipstick left a perfect imprint of her mouth.
“Oh, man!” Frank groaned in protest. “Wipe it off.”
“Not a chance,” Luke said. He took Julie’s hand and led her out onto the deck, where music was playing and a few couples were slow-dancing. He took her in his arms. “It feels so good to hold you like this,” he whispered in her ear.
A tingle shot up her spine as she realized how much she’d missed him. True, she’d been with him every day, but not like this. Not with him feeling well and wanting to act like a boyfriend again. “I promised my parents there wouldn’t be any trouble,” she said softly.
“What kind of trouble could this lead to?” He nuzzled her neck and her heart thudded expectantly.
“The kind where I lose my head and leave lipstick marks all over your body.”
He chuckled. “Promises, promises.”
“Don’t test my patience, buster.”
“How about if I test your endurance?” With that, he kissed her, holding his mouth to hers until she was dizzy.
The slow-dance music ended and another, faster song began. He broke the kiss and grabbed her hand. “Come on. Go for a walk with me.”
They strolled down the sloping backyard, through the tender green shoots of new grass, until they reached the huge oak tree at the far end of the yard. He leaned against the tree and pulled her against him. She felt his hands smooth her hair and heard him breathe in its fragrance. “Oh, Julie … I’m so glad it’s all over with.”
She knew he was referring to his cancer treatments. “Me too.”
“Of course, I still have to go for blood work every six weeks for a while. And Dr. Kessler wants another CT scan the first of June.”
r /> “I’ll go with you.”
“I’ll never forget the way you’ve stood by me.”
She pulled away and realized he was being sincere. “Luke, I could never have left you alone in all this.”
Doubt flicked across his face. “Sometimes, I was afraid you would. It couldn’t have been much fun skipping stuff at school—the dances … basketball games. Guys would line up if they thought you were free of me, Julie.”
“Line up for what? A rejection slip?” She reached up and traced her fingertips along a carving in the tree. “Remember doing this?”
He glanced over his shoulder and read, “ ‘LM plus JE.’ I remember. I was twelve and I saw you out here with Tommy Fischer one afternoon. I got so jealous that late at night I sneaked into your yard and carved this into the tree.”
“And when Tommy saw it, he knew immediately who LM was and he got so scared you’d beat him up that he ran off and never came over again.” She poked Luke’s chest and teased, “That wasn’t very nice.”
“You were so mad, you threatened to have your father throw me off his team.” Luke grinned, remembering.
“And then you showed up on my porch holding that wad of flowers and you looked at me with those big brown eyes and I melted.”
He grinned more broadly. “Once I discovered your weak spot, I never forgot.”
She snuggled close again. “Lucky for you I’m not allergic to flowers.”
She heard him sigh, heard the rumble of his heart against her ear, and thought she’d not been so content since before Christmas. “Did I tell you Uncle Steve called me?” he asked.
“When?”
“Last night.”
“All the way from Los Angeles?”
“He was checking on me and Mom. He’s a nice guy.” Luke paused. “He’s invited me out to visit him this summer.”
“Really?” She was half glad, half sorry. “What did you tell him?”
“I said I wasn’t sure. Of course, Mom wants me to go. You know how she feels about Waterton and getting out of this town.”
“You should go,” Julie said halfheartedly.
“I don’t want to leave you.”
She was touched, but thinking about all the misery his illness had caused him, she knew she couldn’t allow him to forgo the trip on her account. “You couldn’t stay long anyway,” she said. “Dad will expect you to show up on time for fall practice.”
“What will you do this summer?”
“Mom’s got me a job with her friend Mrs. Watson to help down at the public library.” Julie wrinkled her nose. “She wants me to work.”
“That’s a pretty good job.” Summer jobs in a town the size of Waterton weren’t plentiful, and Luke and Julie knew she was lucky to have one. Luke added, “Just think, you’ll have some money to take me out.”
“I’ll have money to buy school clothes,” she corrected.
“I’m wounded.”
“Get over it.” She patted his shoulder, then sobered. “Actually, I’m kind of provoked with my mom. She committed me to the job without even asking me first. But that’s her style—jump in with both feet and make excuses if you have to back out.”
“But you won’t mind working there, will you? I mean, it beats schlepping groceries or baby-sitting.”
“I guess not. Anyway, if you can go visit your uncle, you should.”
“Will you write me?”
“Every day.”
He rested his chin atop her head. “I’m going to start working out at the gym after school with the guys. I’ve got a lot of bodybuilding to catch up on. Uncle Steve says he belongs to a gym and I can work out whenever I want if I come. I have to be in good shape by fall.”
“If you’re worried about losing your starting position, don’t be,” Julie said. “Dad’s counting on you to lead the team.”
“Maybe that’s what’s got me worried.”
“How so?”
“He expects so much of me, Julie. I—I don’t how much this problem’s affected my game.”
She understood his fears. Her father had a subtle way of applying pressure, of placing a mantle of expectation on his players that weighed heavily. No one ever wanted “to let Coach down.”
Her mother often tried similar tactics on her, but she was not very subtle and usually it led to friction between them, rather than compliance. “You’ll get your game back,” Julie assured him. “My dad will see to it.”
Luke grinned. “You’re the only person in the world who can twist your father around her little finger.”
“Don’t you believe it. Daddy loves me, but we’re both stubborn.”
Luke looped his arms around Julie’s waist. “You know what I think?”
“What?”
“I think this conversation has gotten too far afield. I brought you out here, away from all those partying people, to get your undivided attention.”
“You’ve got it. What do you want?”
“This.” He lowered his head and skimmed her mouth with his lips. Again, her knees went weak. “I love you, Julie.”
“Talk is cheap,” she whispered.
He straightened, reached into his jeans, and pulled out a pocketknife. “Then let me spell it out for you.”
He dug the tip of the knife into the bark of the old tree, and soon, under their initials, symbols emerged—the letter I, a lopsided heart, and the letter U. He stepped back. “Now it’s in writing for the whole world to see.”
She draped her arms around his neck, rose on her tiptoes, and kissed the end of his nose. “For the whole world to see,” she echoed. “The whole, entire world.”
Julie, Luke, and his mother rode the train into Chicago the first Friday in June for testing. They had to take the train because Nancy’s car was in the shop and Luke’s was too old for such a trip. “I like the train,” Nancy insisted.
Julie didn’t mind it because she could cuddle with Luke while watching the scenery zip past. Eventually, trees and countryside gave way to buildings, parking lots, and malls.
At the hospital, Julie waited with Nancy while Luke went into the radiology department for the test. She tried to read a magazine, but couldn’t concentrate.
When Luke came back, he told them, “Dr. Kessler wants us to wait while the radiologist reads the scan. He says it’ll save us a trip back.”
So they waited another hour, until Dr. Kessler’s nurse called them up to his office on the seventh floor. They rode the elevator, Julie feeling as if her stomach were twisted in a knot. Perhaps it was just being back in the hospital that was making her nervous; she wasn’t sure. All she knew was that she wanted to see a smile on Dr. Kessler’s face and hear him give Luke a clean bill of health.
“The last time your scans were negative,” Nancy said. “No reason they shouldn’t be the same now.”
But when they walked into Dr. Kessler’s office, he wasn’t smiling. Behind him, X rays were mounted on a light board so that they glowed clearly in dull gray and white.
“Is that me?” Luke asked.
“That’s you,” Dr. Kessler said. “And I’m afraid there’s a problem. There’s a mass in your chest.”
11
“A mass?”
“A growth—a small tumor,” the doctor said, tapping Luke’s chest. “It’s here on your left side, between your lung and your heart.”
Instantly, Luke was on his feet, rage registering on his face. “What do you mean ‘a tumor’? Are you saying that I’m not well? Are you telling us that after all that stinking chemotherapy, I still have cancer?”
“Hodgkin’s is a tricky beast, Luke. Your lymph system networks your whole body. All it takes is one maverick cell to escape and settle elsewhere.” The doctor’s voice kept calm.
Nancy looked so pale, Julie thought she might faint, and Julie felt as if she herself might throw up. “I don’t believe it. I don’t believe that after all Luke’s been through, he isn’t cured of this thing,” Julie cried.
“He’s been in re
mission,” the doctor said. “And when caught early, seventy-five percent of all newly diagnosed Hodgkin’s is curable.”
“But not Luke,” Nancy said. “Not my son.”
“This is a setback,” Dr. Kessler conceded. “Usually remissions last longer.”
“I don’t want to go back on chemo,” Luke shouted. “I don’t want to take that stuff again.”
Dr. Kessler stood and took Luke by the shoulders. “You won’t do chemo again. At least, not now. I’m going to put you into radiation treatments.”
“Radiation?” Nancy asked.
“Radiation will shrink the mass so that we can remove it surgically. It might possibly eliminate it altogether.”
“I can’t miss any more school.” Luke sounded distraught. “I’m already behind and I don’t want to be sick and throwing up like before.”
“Radiation’s not like chemo. And you won’t have to come here to get the treatments. You can go to Waterton General. A friend of mine, Dr. John Laramore, is a radiation oncologist there, and he’ll be handling your case.”
Julie felt as if they were trapped in a bad dream, one that was circular and kept coming back to the same starting place. Why couldn’t Luke get out of this nightmare?
Dr. Kessler made several phone calls and gave Luke fresh assurances. Then Julie, Luke, and his mother left and caught the train home. The very next day, Luke was to start his radiation therapy. He had planned to go to the gym and begin his weight-lifting schedule, but instead he would report to Dr. Laramore to begin another journey into the unknown.
Julie’s father refused to believe the news when Julie told him. He ranted and raved, hopped into his car, and tore over to see Luke. Depressed and morose, Julie flopped on the sofa and flipped through the TV channels without pausing.
Her mother watched her for a few minutes, then came and took the remote control from her hand and turned the set off. She said, “I’m sorry, Julie.”
“It isn’t fair, Mom! Luke did exactly what the doctors told him to do—everything! And now he’s right back at square one.”